When I saw him for the first time, Lily was asleep upstairs, and I was sitting at the dining table staring at the wall.
It had been just over a month since Anthony left, but it felt like a lifetime. I hadn’t heard from him since he’d left, and I knew that it was probably a matter of no news being good news, but if he’d died…
I couldn’t even finish the thought in my head, flinching at the three words as they hung in the space between what I knew for sure and what I thought I did. I couldn’t be sure whether he was alive or dead until I laid eyes upon him, in whatever state they found him in. And that scared the living fuck out of me.
I ran my hands through my hair, letting it fall across my shoulders in soft waves. Lily insisted on taking me out to some fancy salon she found in the city a couple of hours away from us for a cut, and I had to admit, I liked the way it sat on me. When I looked in the mirror, I admired the way it brought out the shape of my jaw and seemed to brighten my eyes. But like with everything else that had happened since Anthony left, he flashed through my brain. Would he like it? Would he touch it lightly with a small smile on his face before he kissed me? Would it pull it while we were fucking from behind? It felt as if there was nothing I could know without him, much as I tried to thresh out a life for myself.
I supposed I was so obsessed with Anthony coming back because I knew that if he returned, it meant that my life in America could pick back up again. It wasn’t that I didn’t like Italy; far from it, I adored it. I loved the fact that when we stopped in for coffee at the tiny shop down the road from us, the place was packed out with men so handsome and well-groomed each of them could have passed for a male model (as Lily liked to point out to me with glee). I loved the food and enjoyed the culture we had the money to indulge in, but I had a life back home waiting for me, ready for my return, and I missed it.
Not a day went by where I didn’t go over everything that had brought us to this point, and wonder if there was something I could have done to avoid it. I thought back to when we brought the restaurant, to the fact that we turned down a place on the other side of town. If we’d just gone for that place instead… God, things would be different. If I hadn’t walked home that way that late, dark night, I might have been able to sidestep everything for a little longer. Or, if I hadn’t asked for Lily to come join me, she might have been able to keep her life, to escape the implications all of this had brought for her.
But then, on the other hand, I had to remind myself - if I hadn’t met those men that night, it would have happened another night. A night when Anthony wasn’t passing by. A night when they might have gone on and killed me, and then come after Lily as the co-owner of the restaurant. The thought of not being able to save her, of being oblivious to all of this, made me ache - she had been so good and so kind to me, the type of friend who would drop everything if it made me feel even minutely better. I had always known she was one in a million, but now she was more than that - we were bonded by everything that had gone down, and we shared a link that would never be broken. Soul sisters, as she described it to me one night after a couple of glasses of wine. And I agreed with her.
Having her around was a relief, as it took my mind off worrying about Anthony. I eventually revealed everything to her - about his past, and our relationship. She was a little taken aback, but after everything she’d seen, I guessed nothing was a real shock anymore. When I told her how I felt about him, she hugged me and told me everything was going to be alright. And when she said it, it felt real. For a moment. I could pretend, there with her, that he was on his way back to me as we spoke and any second then he could have walked through the door and caught me in his arms again.
I loved him. There was no doubt in my mind about that. I adored him with every fiber of my being. Yes, there was a part of me that was worried that our love was driven by the adrenalin and excitement of our situation, but then I would remember our first night together at the restaurant, before any of it started, and remind myself that I was falling for him even then. He was the man I wanted to be with, and even when I caught the eye of the handsome guy behind the counter at the bar we’d begun to frequent, all I thought of was Anthony. I had never much been one for pining, but I found myself lying awake at night and wondering what it would be like if he were there with me. Sometimes, if I thought hard enough, it was as though I could imagine his hands on me, the heat of his body next to mine.
I stretched and let out a little yawn, then got to my feet and began to pace up and down the kitchen. We didn’t use it much. Lily pointed out that now was as good a time as any to pick up on all the regional and national dishes this country had to offer, and with all the money we’d been left, I couldn’t exactly disagree, but it was still the place I felt most at home. On nights that I couldn’t sleep, like that one, I would come down and stand next to the enormous picture doors that dominated the room and stare out at the sprawling lawn in front of me. Beyond it, a small cluster of trees and the stream they lined were just visible; I felt myself calm slightly, the closeness to nature soothing my soul. The sun was just setting, and I made my way out onto the porch to enjoy the stillness of the place for a few minutes.
Just as I sat down, I saw something move out of the corner of my eye. My head snapped up - what the fuck was that? I scanned the grass in front of me, peering down to see if someone was hiding in the foliage, and felt my scalp prickle with fear. I hadn’t been able to truly relax after all that had happened; finding myself jumping at shadows and watching over my shoulder for anyone I perceived as dangerous. I had a nose for it now, and it was one that I found was hard to switch off.
I saw some movement again and got to my feet to give myself a better look at the horizon. That’s when I saw him.
He emerged from the trees and made his way up the grass towards me. I blinked a couple of times, not entirely sure I was seeing him at all - he felt like a mirage, like I’d willed him into being by sheer force of will. But then, I heard his voice echoing up towards me, and I knew it was him.
“Sabrina!”
I took off across the grass, not paying any attention to the fact I didn’t even have shoes on and pulled up my nightdress so that it didn’t get caught up underneath me. We were sprinting towards each other - it was ridiculous as we’d spent so long apart, but I couldn’t bear not to be with him for even the few seconds it took us to collide.
We crashed into each other, and as soon as we did, he hands were all over me. He brushed the hair back from my face and slid a hand around my back, pulling me close, and I grabbed for his ass and his face and his arms, anything that I could grab on to. I felt dizzy and wobbly on my feet as if I was in shock, but then our lips finally found each other and nothing else mattered.
We fell to the ground at once, and he was on top of me - feeling his heat against the cool dampness of the grass beneath me was intoxicating and exciting all at once. Lily flickered through my mind, but then I remembered she was in bed. Not that it would have stopped us if I was being honest.
“I missed you so much,” he murmured urgently against my mouth, his hand sliding my dress and parting my thighs. I spread my legs and kissed him hard, knowing he didn’t need a reply, knowing that he could feel it in the way I grabbed for him.
I wasn’t wearing any underwear, and he skimmed his fingers lightly across my bush before finding my clit and drawing quick, soft circles against it. I raked my fingers over his back, tugging at his blazer, desperate to get at what was underneath. He sat up and tossed it aside, along with his shirt, and returned his hand between my legs. I ran my hand across his shoulders and his arms, as if fulfilling an addiction to him, and arched my hips up to meet his fingers.
He slid them inside of me obligingly, and I let out a cry that seemed to echo out around us for miles. He kissed down my throat and found my breasts, sucking and biting hard, leaving me squirming beneath him. I awkwardly slid my hand down between his legs and shuddered with visceral desire when I felt how hard he was beneath his slacks.
“Fuck me?” I moaned into his ear. I couldn’t wait any longer - I needed to feel him inside me. He planted a kiss on my jaw, firm and passionate, and quickly stripped himself down and sheathed himself. In the last rays of the sunlight, he looked divine - lit by the golden rays, it was as if he was part of a dream or fantasy. I prayed that I would never wake up from it, and pulled him down onto me, drawing my legs up so I could wrap them around his waist.
He watched me as he entered me, taking his time as he slowly pushed himself into my pussy. We let out a simultaneous groan, and then laughed at our synchronicity. Even after all this time, it was as if we were one brain, one mind. At least when it came to screwing.
He ran his hands over my bare legs, leaving gooseflesh in his wake, and then began to move inside me. He started slow, taking his time as if savoring the feeling of being inside me once again. I slipped my hand between my thighs and began to masturbate, remembering all the times I’d done exactly that lying in my bedroom after he left and dreaming of this encounter. I had gone over again and again what it would be like in my head, and none of that had even come close to how fantastic and all consuming this was.
“You’re so beautiful,” he whispered in my ear, his hot breath grazing my neck and making me squirm. I turned my head to kiss him, slipping my tongue past his lips, and soon enough we were lost to it once again. I wasn’t sure how long we stayed like that, but it felt like an eternity and far too soon at the same time.
Suddenly, I found myself teetering on the brink of an orgasm. I opened my eyes and gripped his back, as if clinging on for dear life, shifting my hips and pulling my legs back to allow him deeper.
“You want to come, baby?” He nuzzled my ear lightly, and all I could do was nod. He moved faster, deeper, keeping up a pace until I finally, finally came.
My legs clamped tightly around him as I reached my climax, my cries strangled and almost silent. I remembered the last time we had fucked - how worried I had been, and how terrified I was that it would be the last time we ever had sex. That it would be the last time I ever saw the man I loved. But now he was back, and my relief felt palpable - it moved through my body as my orgasm subsided, my limbs relaxing around him and my body calming. A few thrusts later, he came inside me with a small, gorgeously sexy groan directly in my ear before pulling out of me. He laid next to my side, and pulled me in close, kissing me hard. I wrapped my arms around him and kissed him back, and I honestly believed at that moment I would have been happy never letting go of him again.
We had lain like that for God knows how long, but eventually he moved back and looked at me.
“You’re shivering,” he remarked, and I glanced down at my body - I had hardly noticed how much I was shaking, but then it was hard to notice much of anything with him next to me.
“I guess so.” I shrugged.
“Let’s get inside.” He scooped me up in his arms, letting my dress fall in swathes of fabric around his hands, and carried me back into the house. He was still naked, and I pressed my head against his bare chest and inhaled deeply. God, the smell of him - I’d missed that. It was all mixed up with the scent of the damp grass we’d been lying on, but it was still undeniably him.
We made our way back to the bedroom I’d claimed as mine, and we lay on the bed. He looked over at me and smiled, and I knew the question that I’d been too afraid to ask needed an answer.
“Are we safe?” My words were tentative.
“Yes.” He nodded, and tears pricked my eyes as relief washed over me. “We’re safe.”
“Are we?”
“Really.” He turned to me. “Don’t ask me how I know, but I do. I can promise you that everything’s okay.”
“Oh, Anthony.” I buried my face into his chest. “Thank you.”
“You don’t need to thank me,” he replied gently. “Those people… they needed getting rid of. You were just a catalyst for that.”
“So we can go home?” I sighed. “We don’t have to stay here any longer?”
“Not if you don’t want to.” He cocked his head at me. “But… we don’t have to go home yet. We could travel, and eat, and have adventures…”
“What about the restaurant?” I reminded him gently. “That needs to be taken care of too, you know.”
“I know, I know.” He shook his head. “It was just an idea. Maybe Lily could take it over for a bit?”
“Maybe she could.” I shrugged. Right at that moment, I couldn’t think about anything else but being here with him, and how ridiculously happy that made me. Suddenly, he extracted himself from our embrace and got to his feet.
“Just wait here a second.” He kissed my forehead, and I gazed up at him, pathetically ecstatic. “I forgot something.”
He went back outside. I heard the door open and close, and for a moment I was worried that he was leaving me once again. But he soon returned, carrying his clothes in his arms, and I sat up on the bed.
“Hey, I like you naked,” I teased. “Maybe I should get rid of all your clothes.”
“The rest aren’t arriving till tomorrow, so I guess I’d have no choice,” he shot back with a smile. He was rummaging in his pocket for something, and I cocked my head as I watched him.
“What are you doing?” I demanded, flopping back on the bed and staring at the ceiling.
“There’s something I have to give you,” he murmured. “Aha!”
He suddenly pulled whatever it was he’d been looking for from his pocket and held it up triumphantly. I pushed myself upright and looked over at him. My heart stopped.
In his hand was a small velvet box; the kind that people kept engagement rings in. I stared at him, then back at the box, then him again. Was he doing what I thought he was doing?
“What’s going on?” I managed.
He got down on the floor, still stark naked, and arranged himself so that he was on one knee. I climbed over to the edge of the bed, unable to take my eyes from him. He popped the box open, revealing a simple gold ring in which was embedded the biggest diamond I’d ever laid eyes upon.
“Sabrina,” he asked, a small smile playing at the corner of his mouth, “Will you marry me?”
“Yes.”
The word was out of my mouth before I had a chance to think about it. It didn’t need thinking about - I was certain, more than I’d ever been, about this man. I wanted to be with him, I wanted to marry him; I wanted to spend my life with him. His face lit up.
“Are you serious?” he spluttered.
“Yes!” I leaped off the bed and towards him. “God, fuck, yes!”
He burst out laughing and wrapped his arms around me.
“Thank God,” he murmured into my hair. “I was so worried that you were going to turn me down.”
I pulled back and looked at him: my man, my fiancé, and the person who I’d soon be spending the rest of my life with. It seemed absurd for him to think that I’d have said anything different, especially after everything we’d been through together.
“You never had to worry.” I caught his face between my hands and looked at him intently. “Never.”
“Neither do you, now,” he reminded me and darted forward to plant a kiss on my mouth. I grinned, delirious with joy, and wondered if this feeling would ever fade.
“So, what now?” I asked, raising my eyebrows at him. “Where do we go from here?”
“Wherever you want,” he replied. “Home, or…?”
“Or…?” I prompted him.
“We could go traveling together,” he suggested. “See the world before we go back.”
“That sounds incredible,” I sighed. Before we could make any more plans, I heard footsteps on the stairs, soon followed by a knock on the door.
“Sabrina?” I heard Lily’s sleepy voice drift in from outside. “You okay?”
Anthony and I quickly pulled on our clothes, and I went to the door, opening it wide enough that Lily could see who was inside with me. Her eyes widened, and she blinked a couple of times as if confirming what she was seeing was actually real.
“You’re back?” she murmured, and Anthony shrugged modestly.
“And everything’s dealt with,” he promised her.
“Since you’re out of bed, you want to celebrate?” I grinned at her, catching her by the arm. She looked down, obviously feeling the unfamiliar ring against her skin, and then back up at me.
“I think we’ve got lots to celebrate,” she agreed. “I’ll crack the wine.”
“We’ll be there in a second,” I promised and turned to Anthony. “Thank you,” I murmured, wrapping my arms around him. “For everything.”
“There’s nothing to thank me for,” he replied gently, and I lost myself in his kiss once again. There was no place I’d rather be, no person I’d rather be with. Now, we had the whole world ahead of us to explore together. Life didn’t get much better than this.