I stood in front of the closed door of Carina’s apartment, feeling more alone than ever.

Then, I took a deep breath, put Carina’s backpack on my shoulders, and made my way out of the apartment.

The air outside was cool but pleasant, and I walked down the street with no one else in sight. It was early - or late, however you wanted to look at it - and I was afraid. My heart was pounding, and I wasn’t sure whether I wanted to walk away from him once again. But I knew the main reason I was doing this wasn’t because of me. It was to keep my friends safe.

I couldn’t believe Thorn had threatened Carina. She was the innocent one in all of this, only wanting to help me and Amber get out alright. I hated him for it.

The sun wasn’t out yet as I walked through Belgravia. It was a rich neighborhood, one I had dreamed of living in but knowing full-well I probably never would. Ballerinas didn’t make much money. More than I had before Thorn took me, sure, but not by a whole lot.

I found the tube station a little way off from the neighborhood and bought myself a ticket. It felt so strange to be back in London, to be sitting on the tube with people who knew nothing about me or my problems.

It made me wonder about my life before Thorn. Had I really been happy?

Of course, I had my dreams, hopes, and desires, just like any other young girl. But was I truly satisfied with my life? Would getting a new role in a ballet really change my life that much? And without Thorn, would I have ended up unhappy, broken and alone?

I shook my head to get the thoughts out. The tube ride was taking ages, and I leaned back with a sigh as the ride slowly plowed forward. It was then that I got the feeling of being watched, like someone’s eyes were on me.

I turned my head to the side, but there was no one I knew there. Just regular passengers, people with jobs to go to, who already looked worn out by the week even though the day had barely just begun.

Yet the feeling wouldn’t go away.

It was so intense it made me switch seats, get up in the middle of the ride and stand behind a tall man with headphones in his ears so I wouldn’t be so vulnerable sitting down. But it wouldn’t go away.

I started shaking. I started hyperventilating. The fear set in like a living breathing thing, its fingers wrapping around my throat and squeezing my breaths out of me, just like Thorn used to do. I was afraid and alone, and I felt a panic attack coming on, knowing I had to get out of there. I needed to get off at the next station.

I was shaking as the tube came to a stop, practically running off when the doors opened. I felt like I was transported back in time to some day months and months ago when I was late to ballet practice and I felt like I was being followed. Now, the feeling was back with a vengeance.

I wasn’t far off from my destination, and I kept walking through the now busier streets towards the place I was supposed to be. My heart was pounding, my mind screaming one word at me repeatedly. Danger. Danger. Danger.

I was afraid, shaking as I made my way down the street, pushing past people I didn’t know and trying to keep my tears at bay as I kept on walking. I convinced myself I’d be okay as long as I kept moving, kept going forward, slowly trying to reach my destination where surely they’d take care of me, and where I would finally be safe.

Looking at the address Carina had given me again, I prayed for the first time in my life, but I didn’t know what I was asking for.

My heart, my head, and my feet hurt. I ached for him, to be taken into Thorn’s arms again and be reassured that he would take care of me, make sure nothing bad happened to me. That he would watch over me, make sure I was alright and make sure nobody would hurt me.

I entered a semi-delirious state as I walked down the street, still feeling like danger was a single step behind me. It was morning then, and there were so many people outside, but it didn’t make me feel any safer. In fact, I felt lost in the sea of strangers, their faces unknown to me and unkind, out to hurt me, out to get me. I was afraid.

I kept moving, the little piece of paper in my hands crumpled, the ink smudged from my sweaty hands. There were less and less people around as I made my way into a different neighborhood, checking the paper again to make sure I was following the path Carina had drawn for me. I was.

The panic attack I had felt coming on in the alley was now threatening to come out in full force. My breaths were shallow and panicked and I knew I had to stop, but I was so afraid a monster would jump from the shadows and attack me I tried to keep going at any cost. Finally, it became too much.

My palm gripped the brick wall of an unknown building, and I stumbled forward, trying desperately to catch my breath. I looked around, once again not finding anyone around me. I was alone… no one was out to get me, no one was following me. So why wouldn’t the feeling go away.

I saw an alleyway a little way off, and made my way there, wanting to get to a quiet spot to gather my thoughts. It was partially hidden from the main street, and I figured my panic would finally subside if my mind understood I was somewhere safe.

I opened the fence that led into the alley, checking yet again to see if there was anyone around. But there was no one in sight.

Walking down the alley, I pressed my back against the brick wall and shook with unexplained fear. The tears were really threatening to fall now, burning my eyes and making me want to run for my life even though it didn’t seem like I was in any kind of immediate danger.

Carina’s backpack slid off my shoulder in a moment of carelessness, and the money she’d given me fell on the ground, fanning all over the alleyway. I cursed out loud, kneeling and picking up the bills, clumsily shoving them back inside the bag.

Once I got everything, I straightened up again, the once again full bag resting by my feet. I let out a cry, the only one I’d allow myself, and turned around to walk out of the alleyway again.

When I bumped into a hard, unyielding chest, a scream escaped my throat, but his gloved hand was on my mouth before I could make a sound. My eyes flew up and my body flailed while my mind screamed. Not again. Please, not again.

And in the smallest corner of my mind, there was another thought making its way to the surface.

Please. Please let it be him. Let him take me back home. Let him forgive me.

“Rose,” he growled darkly, and I squeezed my eyes shut, trying to discern whether he was real or a mirage. “Fucking look at me.”

Once again, my eyes flew open. I stared up at him, eyes filled with tears.

Thorn, my Thorn. His palm over my mouth, his eyes thunderous as he towered over me.

“You ran,” he growled, and my whole body shook as we stared at one another. “You ran away from me, my little Rose. Why did you run?”

I couldn’t have answered even if I tried to. He knew the reasons. He knew I ached to dance, to be free. But I knew what the real question was there.

Hadn’t our connection been strong enough? The love we felt for one another, the crazy fucking attraction between us. Hadn’t all of it been enough for me to forgo a different life? To forget about everything else and commit myself to him, belong to him, be his property?

He moved his hand away from my mouth, but I wouldn’t have screamed anyway. In fact, a part of me felt relieved that he had found me. That he had come back for me, proving yet again how much he cared. In that moment I knew I could keep running, but he would also keep coming after me.

“There’s not a place in the world you can hide in from me,” he told me gently, confirming my thoughts. “Not a stone I’ll leave unturned if you fucking run again.”

He walked me back, my back hitting the brick wall as I yelped in pain and he grabbed my cheeks, the leather of his black gloves cold against my skin.

“Say you’re sorry,” he told me darkly. “Tell me you’re sorry for running away from me, Rose.”

“I…” I couldn’t get the words out.

But at that moment it became so very clear that I belonged to him completely, mind, body, and soul. I was his property, and I was as addicted to his special kind of torture as he was to mine.

“I’m sorry,” I managed, my words breathy and needing him to forgive me, to understand. “I’m sorry I ran.”

“You’re mine,” he growled angrily. “Don’t you fucking understand that by now, Harlow?”

My name on his lips felt like a treat, something I wasn’t given very often. I shook in his arms as he pulled me flush against him, his heart pounding above mine.

“Tell me you won’t run again,” he told me darkly, and I shivered under his touch. “Tell me this body is mine. Tell me you’ll do anything I fucking ask of you.”

“I… I will,” I whispered.

In the back of my mind, I wanted to hate myself for how powerless I was being. Yet hadn’t I known things would end like this since the very beginning?

“Beg,” he went on. “Beg me to punish you for what you’ve fucking done to us.”

“Punish me,” I begged breathlessly. “Please, Thorn.”

He slapped me, catching me by surprise as his hand left my cheek.

“M-Master,” I corrected myself. “Punish me, Master, please punish me.”

He held my throbbing cheek gently, stroking the skin with the utmost care. Then, he pulled me closer, his lips touching mine more gently than they ever had.

He didn’t kiss me, just showed me what I’d been willing to run away from. And soon, it became too much to bear, and I kissed him.

His lips were soft and angry, and I kissed him with desperation, realizing at that moment he didn’t have to come after me at all. In the end, I would have crawled back to him. There was no life for me without Thorn. There was no future without him in it.

I needed him just like I needed the air we both breathed. And it was time to stop running. It was time to accept I would do anything for the man in front of me, the man who kissed me like I belonged to him all along.

I felt tears slipping down my cheeks as we kissed, not sure whether I was mourning the loss of my independence, or celebrating finding the love of my life again. He kissed me angrily, like he was trying to teach me a lesson, but I melted into his kiss nonetheless, my legs weak as he held me in his arms and took from my body as if that could make what I’d done to him okay.

I finally understood why he was so angry. It wasn’t because of Amber, or because of my dancing. It was because I had abandoned him, choosing a mediocre life instead of a future with him - a future where he would spend the rest of his life giving me anything and everything I’d ever wanted.

He pulled away from my lips and looked deep into my eyes, and for the first time ever, I saw vulnerability in his eyes, and realized I was the one who’d put it there. And standing in that alley, I vowed to stay by his side no matter what.