She's sitting before me, in my kitchen, munching on one of Daisy's chocolate chip cookies, and staring at me with a level of trust I don't understand. Still, I'll do everything in my power to keep that look in her eyes, even if it means telling her everything. Even if it means risking the fact that she may never look at me again.

"My father was an officer in the Devil's Shadows Motorcycle Club."

Taylor nods, already knowing this.

"When I was eleven, my mom passed away. Breast cancer. After that, my dad got really caught up in the MC life. Spending nights away, partying until morning. He began to move up in the ranks right along with his social expansion in club outings. Slowly, he pulled away from our family, and he pulled Denver along with him. At the time, Jax and I were kids, but we knew enough about his lifestyle that we didn't want any part of it, and we didn't want Daisy around it. We managed to keep things going okay between us for several years. But then Jax enlisted in the military, Daisy entered high school, and Den got caught up in some of my dad's bullshit and got slapped with a stint up in Jackson Penitentiary."

Taylor inhales sharply at this morsel of information, and I wonder if Denver's the only person she's ever met who served time. Probably.

"After that, Denver cut ties with my dad completely and since Dad wasn't contributing anything to our family at that point, just causing more bullshit for the rest of us to deal with, it was an easy decision and all the Kane kids agreed to cut him off. But then Griller, the MC President, caught sight of Daisy one day. She was about sixteen at the time, walking home from school or dance practice or some shit. And suddenly, he started coming around. Dad was locked up but still wanted the MC connection, still wanted some protection on the inside, so he encouraged it." I look away as I say this because I don't even want to see the disgust in her eyes. How the hell could I share DNA with such a monster? On some level, I have to be like him. I mean, I come from his tainted genes.

"And I reached out to cut it off, to keep Daisy out of the pull, to call off the Prospect that suddenly kept tabs on her, to make sure Griller and his guys weren't rolling around trying to pick her up or scare her or invite her to parties or whatever the fuck they were interested in. Dad saw an opening to continue having some control over our family, to use me to help him further his own goals of still being a player in the MC. I started running errands and shit for them, organizing illegal poker games and underground fights, pushing drugs, wheeling and dealing on a bunch of activities that could have landed me in the cell right next to Denver but at the time, the risk was worth it because it kept them away from my sister."

Taylor's eyes soften as she stares at me, the cookie forgotten, her ice water perspiring through the napkin and onto the butcher block. "Carter."

I shake my head, needing to get it all out. If she gives me the slightest bit of compassion, offers just one word of understanding, I might not finish, and she needs to hear it all. To know it all.

"I did a lot of shady things. Got Evie," I say, looking at her, and she nods that she remembers Evie, "in a big fucking mess. I hurt people, whether intentionally or not. I lied, cheated, stole, whatever needed to be done to finish the job. Whatever needed to be done to guarantee Daisy was safe. When she went away to college, it made things easier. A lot easier. But then, there was tuition. So even though the threat of the MC wasn’t as bad, those monthly tuition payments were, and I didn't get out like I told myself I would, like I should have. I told my brothers Daisy got a scholarship. I told Daisy a bunch of grants came through. It was stupid, but I wanted to give her the life my mom would have wanted for her and I got hung up on it. The deals were right there for the taking; the money was too good, too easy." I pinch the bridge of my nose. "I did a million things that make me certain I don't deserve any of the good that someone like you brought to my life. And it caught up with me, like I always knew it would."

"The accident?"

I nod. "The accident. That was so unbelievably stupid. I'm usually not much of a drinker. Especially when I need to be alert all the time. But I was looking for a good, lazy time that day. See, the month before, I ended things with the MC. I told them I was out. Griller asked me to do one last job, to get a bigshot business man to step up to his underground poker game. Just introduce the guy to the players, make sure the business man threw down some money. That was it. I agreed, got Joe to the game, and was done with the MC.”

She bites down on her lip at the mention of her father, and I clench my hands into fists on top of the island for having this type of connection to her dad.

“I swear, I had no idea Joe was your father. I didn’t even realize it until the day I helped you move back into your townhouse. As I was pulling out, I saw your dad pull up, walk over to you and give you a hug hello. I was shocked, completely caught off-guard and felt like a dick. I didn’t know how to tell you.”

“So you kept lying?” Her tone is icy, and I rock forward on my heels before nodding.

“Yeah.”

She raises her eyebrows. “That’s it?”

“No. Then the terms changed.”

“What terms?”

“The terms of the money your dad owed Griller.”

Her eyes narrow, honing in on me like she’s not sure whether she believes me or not. It hurts, reading the uncertainty in her eyes, but it’s well-placed. I guess that hurts even more.

“What happened?”

“My dad called me up and informed me that your dad had twenty-four hours to pay the MC fifty grand or unspeakable things would happen to him. Or, I could go back to working for Griller.”

Her eyes widen, “The alexandrite.”

“The alexandrite.”

“You sold your mother’s pendant to clear my father’s debt?”

“And to keep my future MC-free.”

Understanding dawns in her beautiful blue eyes, and I feel the slowest stream of relief work its way through my chest, up my throat, and out of my mouth on a sigh.

"I'm sorry. Really, really sorry for everything I put you through, Taylor. For making you feel like I played you, used you, or whatever the fuck else. But I swear to you, I would do anything, everything, to keep you safe. To make sure nothing else happened to you. It's already my fault that you lost so much of your career. I didn’t want you to have to deal with more disappointment and more worry where your father is concerned too."

"No, it's—"

"I won't let you lose one more piece of yourself. I want to give you everything. Every single thing that a guy like Barrington Wade can and more. But this is it." I hold my arms out wide, encompassing the kitchen that is almost identical to the way it looked back when Mom was alive. "I don't have much. But whatever I do, it's yours. If you still want it."

I hold my breath as she considers me and even though I don't deserve it, don't deserve her, I'm hoping like hell that she'll give me just one more chance to prove to her that she's worth more to me than everything in the universe combined.