“Absolutely not,” Calix said. Rather than attend court dinner, Calix insisted we stay in our reception chamber so that the court could come to us. “Go to the desert? With my unborn child? No. Never.”
“It’s tradition,” I told him. “The baby needs to be blessed in the desert, or it won’t be healthy and strong. I could even show you the lake, and we could look for the elixir.”
He waved his hand. “Foolishness. Trifectate babies are perfectly healthy without setting foot in the desert. It’s unnecessary.”
“It’s necessary to me,” I told him. “The whole clan gathers, and there are songs and dances. Light and love. I want my family to bless the baby, Calix. I want that for my child.”
“Your family is here,” he told me. “Now, we must speak of more important things. I’m sure we should wait for the tour until your belly grows—everyone will want to see my child growing in truth.” His hand covered my stomach, warm and gentle. “I wonder how long that will be.”
“Not long,” I said. “I haven’t bled for more than two months.”
He nodded, pleased. “Excellent. We will tour you around the country as soon as arrangements can be made.”
“What about the Consecutio? They are eager for us to attend.”
He lifted an unrepentant shoulder. “They will manage their disappointment. It’s not nearly as important as allowing the country to fawn over you.” He kissed my forehead. “My precious wife,” he said. He grinned. “Wait until you see the jewels I’ve commissioned!”
I shook my head. “I don’t need any of that. I just want to go to the desert, Calix. Let my family come and bless the child. It will be good luck.” I tugged his hand. “Please. We needn’t go into the desert; they could all gather in Jitra and meet us.”
He kissed me again. “No,” he said, smiling at me.
Zeph opened the door. “My queen, there are vestai who wish to pay their respects,” he told me.
“Send them in!” Calix crowed.
Two men entered, bowing low. “My queen, we came to offer gifts for you and your child,” one said. He handed me a basket of strange, brightly colored fruit. “These were brought from my estates in the south,” he told me. “Only the most delicious food for the future king.”
Calix beamed at this.
“A necklace, my queen,” said the other man, holding a stone as green as Galen’s eyes on a leather cord. Calix took it in delight, lifting it from the tiny wooden chest it was in to string it around my neck.
“Lovely,” Calix told me. “A stunning jewel for my own priceless gem. Vestai, you please me.”
They bowed at this. “Thank you, my king!”
Calix grinned as they heaped honors upon him. I smiled and sat there while courtiers kept coming with gifts that seemed to have materialized out of the air. Or maybe not—maybe they had all been waiting for this, for the child who would change everything.
While courtiers fawned over Calix far more than they did me, I took a moment to go out to the balcony. The wind was strong, and I found myself staring at the narrow bridges that connected the castle to Galen and Danae. I couldn’t see any activity at Danae’s castle, but I wasn’t sure if she had left to return to the desert yet.
When I turned to the other bridge, Galen was standing on his balcony.
Glancing over my shoulder to see Calix still quite occupied, I went toward Galen’s side. The bridge reminded me of the one I was married upon at Jitra; it was white stone and a little wider, but it didn’t have sides or handholds of any kind. Taking a breath, I stepped up onto it, walking a few feet forward.
The wind pushed me so hard I swayed, and I froze, looking down the hundreds of feet to the churning ocean water.
“Shalia!” Galen called, seeing me. He didn’t hesitate, striding across the bridge, his hand meeting my waist and gently pushing me back. “It’s not safe up here. Certainly not in your condition.”
I stepped onto the balcony, and his hands left me as he glanced at the large windows. “You must be aching to remind me you were right,” I told him. “About the information. That he doesn’t want peace at all—he wants submission.”
“Maybe I wasn’t,” he said, but his eyes moved away from mine. “He said he won’t pursue the information.”
“But he still has it,” I said. “It seems like a very careful distinction.”
“You are queen,” he told me. “Your life is full of careful distinctions.”
It almost felt like an encouragement, and my mouth lifted a little. “You’ll be an uncle,” I said, looking at him.
His shoulders curled forward a little, his head inclined, and when he looked at me, it was with such sharp pain that I felt it inside my chest. “Yes,” he said.
“Galen,” I breathed, raising my hand toward him, but there was nothing I could say, or do.
“I should just leave,” he told me, his voice soft, the wind pulling the sound away as it ruffled through his dark hair. “But I can’t just leave. I can’t leave you here with him. I can’t leave the city to his caprices.”
My mouth was dry. “Galen,” I whispered.
He stepped forward and kissed my cheek, his mouth hovering there, warming my skin, making my whole body tingle and throb. “I have nothing, Shalia, nothing of worth to make promises. And maybe I can’t even keep such a promise, but I will protect you and your children. I’ll protect you until I die.”
In my heart, I knew what he was speaking of. I knew why he should leave, why I shouldn’t say his name, or touch him, or fight with him. Like the power I wanted to hide, the way he made me feel hovered just beneath the surface, stronger for having never seen the light. “I don’t want protection.”
He pulled away and his green eyes met mine. “That’s all I have. That’s all I am.”
I stared at him so long my world drowned in green. “That’s not all you are, Galen.”
The corner of his mouth turned up, but the ghost of a smile held no amusement. “You don’t really know me.”
I crossed my arms around myself, nodded. “Good,” I said, shutting my eyes.
“Good?” he asked, his voice too close.
I kept my eyes closed, desperate to open them, to move closer, to run my fingers over the scars on his face. “Yes. It’s easier to think that I don’t know who you are at all, that I’m imagining this.”
“Maybe I’ll try that,” he said, his voice low and heavy. He was still two steps away, but I felt him, everywhere, close to me, hovering just beyond my skin, calling my power up and making it shiver to be unleashed.
“Ha-ha!” Calix shouted, and I jumped, turning as he closed the balcony door behind him. “Galen, are you hoarding my wife?” he said, striding up to me and putting his arms around me from behind. His hands fanned over my stomach, his lips touched my cheek, and I shut my eyes rather than look at Galen while Calix touched me.
“Forgive me, brother.”
“Most of the court is lined up to see us, wife. Galen, come in and take note of who isn’t there.”
“I’ll stay out here,” I told them. “A few minutes longer.”
Calix kissed my hand. “Are you all right?”
I nodded. “I feel a little ill. The fresh air helps.”
He kissed my mouth, nodding and relinquishing my hand. I watched them walk in together, and I turned away, looking for solace and finding only the endlessness of blue sea.