CHAPTER 21
Enrico watched Kate sleeping. It was just after dawn, a little light filtering into their room. He thought back to those moments on the beach, what he’d said to her about Antonella.
It was all true. Even while he and Fiammetta were involved, Antonella’s presence had hovered close to him. But now—well, more and more, especially the last few days—he’d stopped constantly thinking of Antonella. Which didn’t mean he’d stopped loving her. He always would. Would Kate ever be first in his heart? He didn’t dare hope for that.
All he wanted was to soothe the ache in his chest, to banish the loneliness that coiled around his heart. To stop wishing he was dead. And on those three counts, Kate was the answer he heard. He’d make her his wife—if she’d let him.
He watched the rise and fall of her breathing, the to and fro of her dreaming eyes. Cristo, he was a fool. Kate wasn’t really his. She was in his bed, but that was all. If he demanded anything from her, she’d bolt. His stomach knotted. Could he suffer that loss, that emptiness, again?
No. He had to keep coping with Kate’s indecision, her chaotic moods. Once she knew who he was, she’d come to see that she could trust him, that they could make each other happy. And if he had to hide the divided nature of his heart from her, he would.
When they were talking in the trees, a truth had risen unbidden in his heart: he wasn’t yet fully in love with her, as much as he wished for it. He didn’t love her the way he’d loved Antonella. If he truly loved Kate, he would put her needs first, not his. He would have sent her away, would have married Delfina to keep Kate safe from Carlo.
Instead, he’d followed the dictates of the selfish, greedy side of his heart. And that side said to keep her with him. And it whispered to him, as it was doing now: How could he ever be sure she was safe? How could he trust Carlo’s word? Better to keep her close than to have her far away and in danger. That was the right thing to do, yes? The safest thing?
But if that was true, why did his conscience keep niggling at him?
He sighed. Maybe it was just nerves. Introducing her to Don Battista, that was monumental. His approval of Kate was necessary. Without it, there could be no wedding, no matter what Enrico wanted. And without Don Battista’s approval, she couldn’t leave either. At least not alive.
Under his breath, he cursed Dom for putting him in this position. If Dom had just kept his mouth shut, Enrico could have kept Kate under wraps for a while longer, could have given them both time to sort out how they felt about each other, could have given her the option to leave.
But now that Don Battista was aware of Kate, most likely so was La Provincia. Which meant Enrico’s judgment would be called into question. He would have to account for his actions. He’d endangered the cosca and started a war with Carlo Andretti that probably wouldn’t end until one of them was dead.
But he’d figure it out. He always did, didn’t he?
Kate stirred, and Enrico had the pleasure of watching her awaken. Her eyelids fluttered before opening, and she took a deep breath, her nostrils flaring slightly. Then her green eyes took him in. A moment of anxiety flashed through them before she recovered and smiled. It was a definite improvement over yesterday morning. “Hi,” she said, then bit her lip, her shy gesture seeming most fetching to him.
“Ciao, bella.” He leaned over and kissed the tip of her nose.
“How long have you been watching me?”
“Long enough to realize you are even more amazing than I thought.”
“And all I was doing was sleeping. Imagine how much more impressive I’ll be while awake.”
He gave her a wolfish grin. “I was thinking about that. Debating whether to wake you.”
“You’re insatiable.” She smiled.
“It is all your fault.”
She arched a brow. “Blaming the woman for your lack of self-control, are you?”
How right she was. That was how they’d ended up in this mess. “If you were not constantly tempting me, I would be a model of restraint.”
She chuckled. “I doubt it.”
He growled and lunged at her, pinning her to the bed while he ravaged her with kisses. “I am such a beast, yes?” he asked when she dissolved into giggles.
“A very ferocious one.” He rubbed his hard cock against her and she bit her lip again, this time holding his eyes suggestively. “Very ardent too.”
“As I said, it is all your fault.” He pressed a kiss to her lips. Then he pulled back and looked at her a moment, debating whether to tell her who he was. Was now the right time? Or should he wait?
“What has you so serious all of a sudden?” she asked.
He shook his head. He’d wait until he’d spoken to Don Battista. Much depended on his counsel. “Our meeting today with my godfather.”
She looked up at him, questions in her eyes, then she said, “It means a lot to you, what he thinks of me, doesn’t it?”
He nodded, his heart twisting as he wondered where his own father was, what he would think of Kate. Enrico wanted Rinaldo’s approval too. But it was Don Battista’s that mattered most.
She stiffened underneath him. “Enrico, I haven’t promised you anything. I haven’t decided to stay.”
“I know. But I want you to keep an open mind.” When she nodded, he kissed her quickly, then rolled off the bed, the easy mood between them broken. “We had better hurry. He expects us for breakfast.”
They took a small motorboat around the island, Enrico easily guiding it to a secluded inlet on the northern shore. He tied off at the dock and helped Kate out of the boat. They walked hand in hand toward a simple whitewashed house nestled among a grove of palm trees. Sun streamed down on them, and Kate was glad she’d chosen a light flowery dress that fluttered in the breeze. Near the end of the dock, Enrico stopped short. “Can you wait here a moment? There is something I want to discuss with him.”
She frowned. “More secrets?”
“It is a business matter.”
“Why can’t I hear about it?”
“It is his business; he would not appreciate my disclosing it to a stranger.” He gave her a pleading look. “It will take only a moment.”
“All right.” She sat on one of the pilings, watching him head toward the house. She didn’t like all these damn secrets. She was going to force them out of him if she stayed. If she stayed.
Kate thought back to the sadness on his face when they’d talked about this meeting, about his father. She’d been afraid to say anything at that moment, afraid some quaver in her voice would give her away.
Damn him. The way he’d been looking at her then, he’d made her want to say yes, that she’d stay. That she’d risk his breaking her heart. That she’d stand by him, that she’d trust him to keep her safe from Carlo. But she was afraid to make those promises, afraid to let him have her heart. Afraid to break her resolution to leave.
Enrico found Don Battista on the stone patio at the rear of the house. He was sipping espresso, and he put the cup down when he saw Enrico. “Rico, my son,” he said, his wide smile revealing the small gap in his upper teeth. He rose and embraced Enrico, kissing him on the cheeks. “Where is this lovely American of yours?”
“She’s on the dock. There’s something I need to tell you.”
“What is it?”
“She doesn’t know who I am. What we are.”
The old don’s face turned stern. “Then why is she here?”
“I wanted you to meet her. To give me your opinion. I’m afraid….” He trailed off.
“Afraid of what?”
Enrico had trouble meeting his eyes. “I’m afraid I don’t see her clearly.”
“How do you mean?”
“I can’t decide whether to tell her.”
Don Battista picked up the cup and took another sip of the steaming liquid. “You know what it would mean if she can’t accept it.”
The knot in Enrico’s stomach, the knot that had been there all morning, tightened. “I can’t bear losing her.”
“I’ll give you my opinion after we speak. That is all I can do.” He set down the cup and put his hands on Enrico’s shoulders, giving them a squeeze.
Enrico finally looked up, meeting his gaze. “Thank you, mio padrino.”
Enrico seemed a little more relaxed when he returned for Kate. Taking her hand, he escorted her to the back of the house, where an older, somewhat heavyset man awaited them at a table laden with covered dishes. He rose as they approached.
“Padrino,” Enrico said. “Allow me to present Kate Andretti. Kate, this is my godfather, Vittorio Battista.”
Vittorio stepped around the table and extended his hands toward her. “At last we meet, Signora Andretti. I have heard tales of your beauty, but they did not do you justice.” He took the hand she offered in both of his and kissed it.
Kate smiled and laughed. “If I didn’t know you were Enrico’s godfather, I would have supposed you were his father.” When he gave her a questioning look, she said, “You’re both so very gallant.”
He looked at Enrico. “I do not know this word?”
“She means you are a flirt.”
Vittorio grinned at her. “Ah yes, we share a weakness for beautiful women.” He shrugged. “I hope you will forgive me.”
“What is there to forgive?” she said, enjoying the way his face creased up when he smiled. She could see he’d been very handsome when he was young. He was still handsome now, but in a distinguished way. He’d lost most of his hair, only a short grayish fringe remaining around the back and sides, but the look suited him. His thick salt and pepper mustache and intelligent eyes gave him an air of vitality. Though he was at least twice her age, he was far from dead.
Vittorio’s eyes twinkled. “Ah, now who is the flirt?”
“I cannot help myself around a handsome man either,” she said.
Enrico slipped his arm around her shoulders. “You will make me jealous.”
She nudged him playfully with her hip. “I only have eyes for you.” She surprised herself. It was true. When had that happened?
They sat down and removed the metal covers from the dishes. The meal was simple—cold cuts of various meats alongside olives, cheeses, fresh fruit, and a small pastry. And of course cups of rich, steaming espresso accompanied everything.
They chatted pleasantly while they ate, Vittorio inquiring about Kate’s family and what she thought of Italy. She kept her remarks light and positive, not wanting to trouble the man. He accepted what she said without comment, then he surprised her. “Signora, I must extend you my regrets regarding what happened with your husband.”
“Please, call me Kate. And there is no need to apologize.”
“It was a terrible thing, and I have had some involvement in the matter.”
“Oh?”
Enrico gave him a look she couldn’t read, but Vittorio didn’t seem to acknowledge it. “The conflict with the Andrettis dates back many years. It stems partly from my advice to Enrico’s father.”
Interesting. “What was your advice?”
“I thought he could do business with Andretti without getting hurt. I was wrong.”
“You knew who Carlo Andretti is? That he’s a mobster?”
Vittorio nodded. “I thought he was a reasonable man. He is not.”
Kate let out a little sound of agreement. “Far from it.”
“He will want you dead for killing his nephew.”
She thought for a second, then started to laugh. The most ironic thing just occurred to her.
“What is it?” Vittorio asked.
“Vince is the one who taught me to shoot.”
Vittorio smiled. He studied her for a moment. “You are at ease then, with killing him?”
The smile left Kate’s face. “‘At ease’ is an overstatement. But I have come to terms with it. And I would do it again.”
Vittorio nodded. “I can see it on your face. Most people, especially most women, I think, would not be so determined.”
“There really was no decision to make. I was not going to die and neither was Enrico.”
Vittorio took a sip of his espresso. “You are an unusual person.”
“No, just very practical, in the end. I’m not happy I had to kill him, but I did learn something important about myself that day.”
“What was that?”
“I learned what my limits are. What I will and will not tolerate. And it turns out, my limits are not what I thought.”
“How so?” Enrico asked.
“You were there, Rico. I wouldn’t let him rape me, and I wouldn’t let someone else kill for me. I wanted my revenge on him, for hurting me.” She smiled, but not pleasantly. “I’m more vindictive than I thought.”
“I think killing him was more about survival than revenge,” Enrico said.
She gave him a hard look. “Then why didn’t I let you or Ruggero finish him?”
“I had not wondered about that.”
“Yes, you have. Don’t tell me it didn’t cross your mind that I could be Andretti’s spy.”
Enrico looked at her in surprise. “It did. But I soon dismissed it.”
“I would hope so. You’d be an idiot to keep me around if you thought I was a threat.”
He held her gaze. “I would indeed. I have seen what you can do.”
“Practice, practice, practice. There’s no point doing something if you can’t do it well,” she said lightly, even though it seemed odd to be joking about shooting someone. She really had come to terms with it. Who was this person in her body?
Vittorio chuckled. “I like you very much, Kate. I hope you will make my Enrico happy and join the family.”
Kate’s heart stuttered. What had Enrico said to him about her? Was that the “business matter” Enrico had wanted to discuss with him? She smiled gamely. “Mille grazie, Vittorio. I like you very much as well. I know how much Enrico means to you, and I’m humbled you think I’m a worthy companion for him.” Kate gave a mental sigh of relief. There, it was the truth, but it didn’t signal her intentions.
“Cara, would you mind giving us a minute alone?” Enrico asked.
She nodded and hurried away from the table, heading back to the dock. She didn’t want Enrico to see how unnerved she was. Was he planning to ask her to marry him? Was this all about getting his godfather’s blessing? Shit, shit, shit!
When Kate was out of hearing range, Enrico turned to Don Battista. “So, do you think she can bear the truth?”
His godfather nodded. “Of course, I could be wrong.”
“And if you are….” Enrico inhaled deeply. “I can’t kill her, Don Battista. I can’t.”
“I see that. Yet you can’t marry her and not tell her who you are.”
“I know.” Enrico shook his head. “I hate this.”
Don Battista leaned forward. “You are, as the English say, on the horns of a dilemma, my son. But remember this: the ’Ndrangheta comes first. You took the vows; you know the price you will pay if you don’t honor them. I cannot save you. If you tell her and she doesn’t accept you, you must kill her. And it would be a shame; she would make a lovely wife and mother of your children. Such spirit. She reminds me of Antonella.”
“Me too.” Enrico looked up at the old don. “And that worries me. Is that why I love Kate?”
Don Battista pursed his lips, considering. Then he shook his head. “She’s like Antonella, yes. But different. She’s her own person.” He looked at Enrico for a moment before continuing, and Enrico wished he could read his godfather’s mind. “She cares about you, but she doesn’t love you the way Antonella did. She holds herself away from you.”
“She knows I’m keeping something from her.”
The old don sighed. “Either take the risk and tell her, or send her away now.”
“I can’t let her go. I don’t trust Carlo not to hurt her.”
“Then you must risk hurting her.” He paused. “Better for her to die at your hands, than his, yes?”
Enrico recoiled at the idea, but he had to admit there was a perverse logic to it. At least he’d make sure she didn’t suffer. “I’m not sure I could do it and not kill myself afterward.”
His godfather studied him. “So this is what Domenico meant.”
“What did he say to you?”
“You’ve changed.”
Enrico snorted. “When haven’t I been this way? I never should have been capo.”
“Why did you take it then?”
“How could I disappoint my father after all he’d suffered? With Primo and Mario dead, I was all he had left.”
“You did the honorable thing, my son. You always have. That’s why I love you so much.” The old man’s voice roughened with emotion and he coughed to clear his throat. “But you must decide now what is most important to you: what the family needs, or what you want.”
“I’ve already decided. I’ve already jeopardized so many lives for her.”
Don Battista nodded. “There are some in La Provincia who think you need to be replaced.”
“Benedetto, I assume.”
“He’s not alone.”
“Who then?”
His godfather looked at him for a moment, then his eyes shifted toward the trees that sheltered his home. “I’ve defended you, but I must admit to having my own doubts. You will have to answer for this. Carlo has petitioned his brother for a hearing.”
Enrico wasn’t surprised to hear that. But he didn’t like to hear that Don Battista doubted him. His pulse sped up. “You think I should step aside, and let Dom take over?” The knot in Enrico’s gut doubled in size. If he lost his godfather’s support, it was all over.
“No. I know what he wants to do to the cosca. The drugs, the girls—” Don Battista shook his head in disgust. “It would be against everything your father and I have stood for. I know it may be a losing battle, but I won’t let the ’Ndrangheta turn into a cesspool without a fight.”
“I don’t want that either.” But I don’t care about it as much as I care about her.
The old man sighed. “You know what you must do, my son. What is best for everyone.”
Enrico nodded, feeling defeated. “I know. And I will do it.” He tried to keep the bitterness out of his voice, but he felt he didn’t succeed. He rose to leave, but the don stopped him.
“There’s one more thing.”
“Yes?”
“This disagreement with your cousin needs to be resolved, very soon, or it will break the cosca apart.”
“Which disagreement? The one about Kate or the one about the codes?”
“Both. He is hardening his heart against you. I didn’t like what I heard in his voice.”
Enrico bristled. “Dom is not the one in charge.”
“Then make sure that you are.” Don Battista’s voice was firm, his tone final. “Your cousin needs to know that.”
Enrico nodded. “Thank you for the advice, mio padrino.” He quickly kissed Don Battista on both cheeks. He was turning to leave when the don stopped him again. What now?
“I have a surprise for you.”
“You do?”
“Your father is here, in Capri. If you wish to see him, call this number.” Don Battista handed him a slip of paper.
Enrico looked down at it, his stomach flipping over. “Did you arrange this?”
The old don shrugged. “Rinaldo has run from his problems long enough.”
“But they’re my problems now.”
Don Battista shook his head. “Carlo has a long memory.”
“So do I.” Images of his brothers riddled with bullets and bathed in blood flashed through his mind.
“I will call you with the details for the meeting with La Provincia.”
He thanked Don Battista, then left to find Kate, wishing his godfather had thought of some clever solution to his predicament. But of course there was nothing. There never had been. He was in this for life, or he was dead. And if he wanted to live, he had to protect the cosca. There was no other choice. Even if it meant cutting out his own heart. He could still run things without one.