S’mores
On my way out the door the next morning, I take a hard look at the keys on the hook. After I got home last night, I did a quick run through on all of our bills coming due for the month and was surprised to find that Gramps already paid the electricity bill. When I asked him about it, the only answer I got was ‘it’s covered until at least December’. I pressed him for more details, but it was like pulling teeth, so I gave up. That means that I’ve got an extra one fifty in the bank. Teagan’s words got me to thinking and why shouldn’t I get a cell phone? There are those prepaid things and if I don’t have the money that month then I just won’t keep service on it. I was so excited last night that I almost went right then to get one, but common sense won me over. It’s always best to sleep on big decisions.
I’m pretty sold on it this morning and since I have to work later, it would make more sense to drive. I’ll never make it over to the store and in to work on time if I’m walking. Snatching the keys down, I walk toward Gramps’ door. I knock softly, but there’s no answer. I hate to wake him up, but I need to make sure that he isn’t going to need them today. It’s not like he can drive, but sometimes the neighbors come over and borrow the car to run errands for him or take him to the doctor when I can’t.
“Gramps?” I call out softly, knocking again. I get no answer. One of my biggest fears is that I’m going to come knocking one day and the no answer will mean the worst. I know it’s inevitable. We all die at some point. I just don’t want it to be right now. There’s rustling on the other side of the door and I let out a relieved breath.
I hear him cough before saying, “Kendall? Everything ok?”
Cracking the door, I give him a few seconds warning and then peek my head around the corner, “I was going to take the car today. Would that be ok?”
He tries to hide his shock, “That’s perfectly fine. Robert did everything I needed him to do yesterday. Just drive careful please.”
“I will, Gramps, promise. I won’t be back after school. I’m going to run to the store before work. Want anything?” I ask.
He shakes his head then stops, “You know, I saw a commercial the other day for some of those white fudge covered Oreos. Your Nana would have loved those. Could you pick some up for us?”
I smile, “Of course. How are you feeling?”
“Better than I have all week,” he says smiling.
“Good,” I tell him, “I’ll be back later tonight. Call me at the school if you need anything or need me to bring the car back.”
He nods as he slowly lays back down, “I will, Pea. Drive safe.”
His words choke me up and I have to shut the door before I start crying. Gramps and I have never really said that we love each other, but his use of the nickname Pea reminds me that we don’t have to. It’s enough just to know that he cares, because we both already know. My heart takes a deep stab wound as I think about losing him. Not today Kendall. Keep your shit together.
I manage to make it all the way through school without running into any trouble, other than Mr. Parker telling me that if I’m going to start driving to school that I’ll need a parking pass. I spend my lunch break in the office filling out paperwork and waiting on the secretary to get her ducks in a row, but it pays off. Waiting until last bell, I rush out to put the sticky thing on my window, so I can hurry to the store.
“Goddamn it,” I say getting frustrated. The thing is monstrously huge and super sticky and for some reason keeps trying to crinkle on the window. I’m about ready to give up when a male hand reaches around and takes the sticker from me.
“Here let me help,” a voice says. I look up to see Billy Terth, the school’s quarterback, smiling back at me. Embarrassingly enough, he flattens the sticker in less than five seconds.
I want to thank him for his help, but my mouth is glued shut. His dirty blonde hair shines in the sun and with his hazel eyes plus a bright white smile, there’s no doubt that he’s a looker. He doesn’t run in Derrik’s circle, but that doesn’t mean that I trust him. Call me a stereotype if you want, but I don’t put anything past that asshole.
“Thanks,” I say finally.
He smiles wider, “You’re more than welcome. Those things can be kind of tricky at times.”
If I was feeling anything towards him, his next words would have crushed them, “I haven’t seen you around before. Are you new here?”
“You’re kidding right?” I say not able to stop myself.
He looks taken aback, “What?”
“Dude, we’ve been going to school together since the fourth grade,” I say backing up to open my door. “And what’s even worse is the fact that we have three classes together right now.”
His eyebrows draw down on his face as it scrunches in confusion. When I start the car, he backs away throwing me a smile and a wave. It’s actually a fucking creepy smile. His look is how a runner looks at the finish line. It makes me miss Lucas and the other guys. They may be arrogant prep boys, but at least they are genuine and don’t give me the willy nilly’s.
I try to shake it off as I go into the store. Conscious of my time frame, I know I don’t have a lot to spend picking anything out. Doing the next best thing, I get someone to help point me in the right direction. I manage to make it out of the store with a working smart phone, whatever the fuck that is, and a month’s worth of service for less than ninety bucks.
The first thing I do when I get to the car is save Lucas and Teagan’s number in the contacts the way that the guy showed me in the store. It takes me about five minutes, but I also figure out how to send them both a text message letting them know that I finally got a phone and giving them my number.
“Shit,” I say glancing at the time. “Shit, shit, shit.” I’m going to be late for the first time ever. I’ve got five minutes to make the fifteen minute drive to the restaurant. After Charles’ words the other night, I don’t think he’ll fire me over it, but it’s more than that. Nana and Gramps raised me with a work ethic of knowing better. Early bird gets the worm and all that hoopla.
Unfortunately, it looks like I won’t be getting that metaphorical worm today. I’m ten minutes late and have to rush through throwing my uniform on in the bathroom. Trying to make up for being so late, I work my ass off into the night. We are busier than normal and since I’m trying extra hard, tips roll in.
By closing time, there’s a fat wad of cash in my pocket. I’ve been staying so on top of everything that by the time Charles locks the doors, all I’ve got to do is fold some silverware up into napkins and the dining room will be done.
He walks by and pats me on the shoulder, “You’re the best employee I’ve got girl.”
I smile at his back and he says, “Just don’t tell the others.”
It makes me proud as stupid as it sounds. It’s not much, but I’ve never really stood out anywhere except here. I’m still ridiculous smiling as I grab my clothes from the back and Charles locks me out. There’s a whistle that sounds like a bird and I raise my head to find Teagan sitting on the ass end of a brand-new hunter green Jeep Wrangler.
“What are you doing here?” I ask as I make my way to him.
Holding up his phone, he says, “You never messaged back. Just wanted to check and make sure you were ok.”
Oh hell, “Sorry, I got here late and had to rush to change my clothes and everything.” I dig the phone out of my bag and see that it’s got four new little message symbols at the top. When I open the texts, I see that two are replies from Lucas and Teagan and two are from numbers I don’t recognize. There’s no question who they are though. Sure enough, when I open them, I see Maverick and Goose’s name.
“You gave them my number?” I question.
He looks sheepish, “Technically, it wasn’t me. Lucas sent it to them, but only because they threatened to beat him up for it if they didn’t.”
I laugh. Fucking boys.
“Besides,” he adds, “For one, there’s never been any secrets between us. And two, what if they needed to get in touch with you while Lucas and I weren’t around.”
“One of the perks of the temporary pass?” I ask
He nods, “Don’t worry though. If you don’t want to talk to them, just tell them to back off.”
I smile, “Ok.”
There’s a few seconds of silence before he asks, “Want a ride home?”
For the first time today, I’m disappointed that I drove, “I borrowed my Gramps’ car today, so I could go get the phone before work.”
It only takes half a second for me to see that Lucas told them about our conversation, “Wow, there really are no secrets between you guys huh?”
I get an apologetic smile in return, “He didn’t really mean to. Maverick has a way of dragging shit out of people.”
“Oh, and I’m sure that you and Goose had nothing to do with it at all,” I light heartedly accuse.
He places a hand over his heart, “Ouch. Already grouping us together like everyone else does.”
My eyebrow goes up. He laughs, “Ok, fine. We might have had a little to do with it. I can make it up to you though.”
“Yeah?” I ask. “And how’s that?”
He watches my face, “Well, I was going to see if you wanted to come hang out with me for a little while tonight. We have this fucking awesome fire pit out back and I’ll even stop to get stuff for s’mores.”
“Isn’t it a little late, especially since we’ve got school tomorrow?” I ask.
Shrugging, he says, “I’m somewhat of an insomniac, so I’m used to working with little to no sleep.”
“We definitely don’t have that in common then. I turn quite bitchy without sleep,” I say watching disappointment flash in his eyes. I sigh, “But it probably wouldn’t hurt to lose a little tonight.”
“Hell yes,” he says jumping up.
I laugh, “I just need to go check on my Gramps before we go and change my clothes real quick.”
He nods, “We can drop off your car and I’ll drive you home when you’re ready to leave tonight, if you want.”
The thought sounds more appealing than I think it would, “Ok, but I hope you don’t mind that I’m taking the long way home.”
He grins, “Nope.”
I hold up my phone, “Let me just answer them back real quick so they don’t think the worst like you did.”
“Here, let me see it,” he says reaching for it. It only takes him several presses of the buttons before he hands it back, “Just type in your message and hit send. It’ll go to all to of us in a group chat.”
I do as he says telling the others what happened and that I’d talk to them later.
“Don’t tell them you’re with me,” he says quickly before I hit the send button.
My eyes narrow, “Why?”
He shrugs and fiddles with his keys, “I just don’t want them randomly showing up at the house tonight. I’d rather keep it just us, if that’s ok?”
I smile, “Sounds good.” When I hit the send button, Teagan’s phone beeps and he shows it to me.
“That’s pretty cool,” I admit. “Saves time.”
“Yep, and if you don’t delete the message then you won’t have to go back in and start a new one,” he says.
I nod in understanding, “Thank you.”
He grins and one arm hugs me, “You’re welcome. Now, let’s go. The night is wasting away. I’m following you.”
When I get in the car, Teagan’s scent still clings to my shirt. It smells amazing and makes my palms sweat at the same time. I wipe them on my jeans and drive home, with him right on my heels.
All the lights are off in the trailer, so that means that Gramps is already in bed. I tell Teagan to stay in the Jeep and I’ll be right back. Making quick time of it, I change clothes and am back out the door with my wallet in one pocket and phone in the other. At the last second, I remember to grab my leather jacket out of the Malibu.
When I jump in with Teagan he smiles at me and asks, “Ready?”
I let out a quiet breath and nod.
He pats my knee before backing out. Driving just as careful as Lucas had, Teagan takes back roads and we are at his house in roughly thirty minutes. He blares music and sings along never missing a lyric. My fear was absolutely non-existent the whole drive, because I kept going back and forth between laughing and singing with him.
The house that we pull up to is one of the most stunning places I’ve ever seen. It looks like it belongs in a painting from the Civil War. Plantation style columns hold up a wrap-around porch on both the top and bottom floor. There are windows everywhere and with the lights on inside, it is a fucking dream house.
“Wow,” I say quietly as Teagan comes around to help me down from the Jeep.
He doesn’t even bother looking, “I know. It’s ostentatious, but it’s what Cynthia wanted.”
“Who’s Cynthia?” I ask.
Throwing his arm around my shoulder, he looks at me and smiles, “My step-mom. Want to meet her?”
I tuck the loose strands of my hair behind my ear nervously, “I didn’t know I’d be meeting anyone tonight.”
His cheeks lift again, “We don’t have to if you don’t want to.”
Right. I may be trailer trash, but my Nana taught me southern hospitality. “It’s ok,” I tell him adjusting the bottom of my shirt to try and hide one of the holes. The last thing I want to do is embarrass him or myself.
“You’re beautiful,” he assures me.
My heart does a skip pattern at his words. There have only been three people in my life that have said them to me. Even Nana never did. She said that it made people vain. I plaster a fake smile on my face and he pulls me to a stop, “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to say the wrong thing.”
“It’s not you,” I admit quietly. “I’ve just got a lot of issues.”
He looks down at me for so long that it makes me feel a little awkward, so I blurt out, “Look, maybe this was a mistake. You can take me home if you want.”
Pulling me in for a hug, his voice rumbles through his chest into my ear, “You’re not going to get out of tonight that easy.” I want to have some witty comeback, but being this close to his smell has deep fried my brain. I just wrap my arms around him and live in the moment.
“Let’s go get the fire started,” he finally says. His voice is a little deeper and butterflies take flight in my stomach. Dazed, I walk hand in hand with him through the house until we come to the last room near French doors in the back. I wouldn’t be able to describe the inside if my life depended on it. I’m too distracted by Teagan.
He pulls us to a stop before we make it to the doors. There are two people in a sitting room of sorts. The woman is sitting with her feet curled under her and a book in her lap. She’s very pretty, but not much older than us. If I had to guess, I’d say twenty-five at the most. The man is just an older version of Teagan with short hair and leathery sort of face.
“Hey guys,” he says to them.
The woman looks up immediately, but the man finishes whatever he’s doing on his gigantic phone looking thing.
“This is Kendall,” he says pulling me forward a little. “Kendall, that’s Cynthia and Steve aka mom and dad.”
She gets up and comes over with an outstretched hand, “Nice to meet you, Kendall.”
I shake her hand in return, “Nice to meet you too.” She gives me a once over with her eyes and smiles.
“Nice to meet you, Kendall,” his dad says. Before I can respond he continues, “How was practice today son?”
Teagan shrugs, “Same as any other day.”
His dad makes a tsk noise behind his teeth, “Did the coaches confirm about scouts at the game on Friday?”
Shaking his head, Teagan says, “No sir, not yet.”
He hrmphs and goes back to what he was doing before.
“We’re going to go out back to the fire pit,” he tells them as we start toward the door again.
Cynthia follows us, “Do you guys need anything?”
“Shit,” Teagan says turning back around quickly. “We forgot to stop by the store.”
“It’s ok,” I say at the same time Cynthia says, “For what?”
“I told Kendall we could make s’mores and I’m an idiot and forgot to pick up the stuff,” he tells her.
She claps her hands and reaches out for my other hand that isn’t in Teagan’s, “I bet there’s some stuff in the kitchen left over from Ryleigh’s last little get together.” I want to look back at Teagan to see if this is normal behavior for her, but she’s pulling me along before I get the chance to.
We walk into a well-lit kitchen that is covered in chrome. It looks expensive and pristine. She finally lets me go and walks into a closet that has shelves as full as a grocery store. I can’t help but to stare, even after she’s already walked back out.
She notices my attention, “Have to keep a full pantry around here. Never know when all of the boys will be here, and they eat up everything in the house. But here you go.” She hands over graham crackers and a Ziploc bag that has individually wrapped chocolate bars and a bag full of marshmallows in it.
“This is awesome, Cynth. Thanks,” Teagan says coming around me to side arm hug her.
She blushes a little, “You’re welcome. Glad I could help.”
Her reaction is strange, but I wait until Teagan has the fire roaring and we are warm and toasty before I ask him about it, “So Cynthia?”
His eyes watch the fire, “Yeah, my birth mom left us a long time ago, right after Ryleigh was born. Dad has been married four times now. I guess you could say that he’s just a hard man to live with. Cynthia is the coolest one out of all of them. She just tries a little too hard sometimes. And I get it man. It’s hard raising kids when they are right behind you in age.”
I’m curious, “What’s the age difference if you don’t mind me asking?”
“You can ask anything,” he smiles turning to look at me, “I like you knowing things about me.” Those damn butterflies are back, but he doesn’t need to know that. “There’s only a five-year gap between us. I’m eighteen and she’s twenty-three.
Damn. She’s even younger than I thought, “Ok, I have to ask. Is your dad not worried about you guys being so close in age?”
His face scrunches up in disgust and I laugh, “Not like that, but what about your friends or friends of friends.”
He shrugs, “I’ve never really asked him, so I don’t know how he feels about it. No one but the guys have ever spent time over while my parents are here and I’m not worried about them. That would be worse than sleeping with Ryleigh and they know that shit won’t fly.”
“Yeah, I get that,” I say pulling my eyes away from his.
“Hey losers, why wasn’t I invited to the party?” Ryleigh says from behind us. She catches sight of me and her step picks up. “Oh, hey Kendall. I didn’t realize it was you out here. I thought it was just the boys again.”
“Hi,” I say in return, “Nope, it’s just us tonight.”
“Hey, sprout, will you go grab the skewers inside? I forgot them earlier,” Teagan asks her.
She laughs, “Well, I would have said yes, but you just added that sprout thing in there.” Her butt falls into a chair opposite us.
Teagan smiles and mumbles under his breath about sisters as he gets up, “Don’t go anywhere until I get back.”
I’m not sure if he’s talking to me or her, but we just look at each other and I let out a small laugh when she giggles.
I watch him walk all the way into the house and when I turn back to her it’s to find her staring at me. Clearing my throat, I say, “I hope you don’t mind that we borrowed your stuff from the kitchen.”
She shakes her head, “Not at all.” Leaning forward she braces her forearms on her knees, “They like you, you know.”
I’m not even going to pretend to not know who this ‘they’ is she speaks of, but I can’t think of anything to say to it. I just keep my mouth shut.
“It’s been a really long time since I’ve seen Lucas laugh like he did with you yesterday. Fully letting go like that. Not to mention, Teagan has never once brought a girl home before,” she says.
“Never?” I ask curiously.
She sits back in her chair and shakes her head again, “Nope.”
In my state of shock, I stare at the fire and mull over her words. It’s only a few seconds before Teagan comes strolling back out with the metal sticks in his hand.
“Are you staying little sis?” he asks Ryleigh.
She stands up and brushes imaginary dust off her pants, “I don’t know why you do that. I’m not that much younger than you, but no thanks. Beauty sleep and all of that jazz. Bye Kendall. I’ll see you Friday.” She throws me a wink, “If not sooner.”
A thousand watt smile from Teagan makes me forget everything for a moment, “S’more?”
I take the gooey mess from him, “Thanks.” I’ve never had one before, but I’m not going to admit that to him. Taking my first bite is pure heaven on earth. I don’t even know if the fudge covered Oreo’s I left on the counter for Gramps could even compete. “This is fucking amazing,” I say around a mouthful. Not the most elegant thing I’ve ever done, but it can’t be helped.
Teagan looks at me incredulously, “Please tell me that you’ve had one before. Did I give you your first?”
My face flames as hot as the fire at his innuendo and he throws back his head and laughs. Oh really? As much as I hate the waste of a perfectly good roasted marshmallow, I dip my finger into the goo and wait until the right moment. His head turns at just the right angle and it catches the very tip of his nose. I couldn’t have planned that better if I truly tried.
His mouth hangs open in surprise still half smiling, “Is that so?”
Flashing out in a lightening move, his hand grabs ahold of my wrist of the hand that has the goo still on it. I try pulling it back, but it’s no use. My thought process is he’s going to use it to smudge it against my face, so I quit fighting. My heart thuds in my chest as he locks eyes with me and slowly lowers his head to take my finger into his mouth. I feel like such a moron for not seeing his intentions before-hand, but I can’t bring myself to complain at the situation I’ve found myself in. His tongue swirls around my finger and as odd as it sounds, it feels so good. My eyes close on their own accord as I savor the feelings that he is stirring inside of me.
A deep hum comes from him as he pops my finger out of his mouth, “That’s so much better than a s’more any day.”
I want to clear the rest of the distance between us and get my own taste. As if reading my mind, he leans into me and presses his lips against mine. When his tongue teases my lips, I open for him. Just when I think that nothing in the world could possibly taste better than the s’more, he proves me wrong. His hand comes up to cup my chin and it’s warm against the chill of my skin. All too soon, he is pulling away and kissing the tip of my nose. He leans in again and I get my hopes up for another kiss. Instead, he rubs his nose against my face and spreads the goo across my cheek.
“Never play with the master,” he says retreating back into his seat laughing.
Wiping the marshmallow off my cheek, I can’t help smiling with him. It’s contagious.
He moves his chair as close as he can without sitting in my lap and takes ahold of my hand, “I’m sorry if you didn’t want us to know about what you told Lucas. It was an invasion of your privacy and we shouldn’t have pressured him so hard to tell us.”
I sigh, “I’m actually kind of glad that he did. It seems like I might be hanging around for a little while and I’d rather not go through it three more times.”
He nods, “I get it. I’m here if you ever do want to though.”
“Thanks,” I say relaxing in my chair.
Squeezing my hand and playing with my fingers, he asks, “Can I just ask one question?”
“You gave me all access so it’s only fair right?” I reply.
He hesitates, “I just don’t want you to feel obligated to sate my curiosity. I’ve just been kind of wondering and Lucas wouldn’t tell us.”
“What is it?” I ask.
“He told us why you’re scared of riding in cars,” he says, “and trust me, I completely get it. I can’t imagine what it’s like going through something like that. Who was it that you lost?”
I take a deep breath and let it out slowly as my hand tightens in his. It will never be easy talking about them, but it seems to be easing some of the weight off my heart to say their names out loud, “Their names were Will, Casey and Brian VanPelt.”
His head jerks toward me, “I knew Brian through the construction place that we volunteered for a few summers ago. He went to lunch with us a couple times and was an alright dude.”
I nod, “That he was to say the least.”
“So, they were family?” he asks.
“Might as well of been,” I say softly. A tear rolls down my cheek, “They were mine.”
“Wait, what?” he asks stunned. “What do you mean yours? Like your boyfriends?”
As I nod again, he whistles under his breath, “Wow.”
“I’m not a whore if that’s what you’re thinking,” I say going on the defensive. “It wasn’t conventional, but I loved them, and they loved me. What’s so wrong with loving more than one person huh? Who the hell ever set up those fucked up rules anyways?”
“Woah,” he says pulling my hand to his lips, “I wasn’t judging babe and I’m sorry if it came off that way. You just caught me by surprise is all. I tend not to have a filter sometimes and you are more than welcome to slap me if it ever offends.”
He softly says, “Hey.” When I don’t look at him, he pulls my chin to face him, “There’s nothing fucking wrong with the way that you love, and I’ll kick anyone’s ass who tells you otherwise.”
Another tear tracks down my cheek, “It’s not like it matters anymore right?”
“Don’t think like that. While you’re still breathing, there’s always tomorrow and I’ll be damned if I let you forget it,” he says right before he pulls me in for another kiss that’s even more breath taking than the last.