Chapter Fourteen
Reid’s fingers were curled around the back of Rusty’s slender neck, over the rose inked there, hair sliding against his hand, warm and silky smooth as he led her inside. He used those seconds to calm the hell down.
What the fuck?
She was trembling. But it wasn’t from fear. She sure as shit wasn’t afraid of him. If she was afraid, she never would have thrown a goddamn rock through his window right in front of him.
Shoving aside the toilet paper blocking his way, he unlocked the door, letting it swing open. When she stood rooted to the spot, he gave her a gentle push. “In you go.”
Head down, she walked into his living room like a petulant child, one that didn’t want to admit she was wrong despite the glaring evidence. “Is this gonna take long?” she muttered.
“Sit your ass down.”
Surprisingly, she did as he said, though she scowled at him, throwing a shitload of attitude his way. “I’m sitting. Now what?”
“Now you talk to me, like you should have done when you saw me with Nina outside her hotel instead of coming to my place and messing shit up.”
She shrugged. “What do you want me to say?”
He arched a brow. Was she for real?
She grumbled something under her breath and crossed her arms. “Okay. God. I was wrong. I admit it. Sorry, whatever.”
Her chest rose and fell rapidly. She was nowhere near as calm as she pretended to be, not at all. And as hard as he tried, he couldn’t get a handle on her mood, what she was thinking.
He took a step closer. “Why are you freaking out right now? Have I given you any reason to be afraid of me?”
“No.”
“Then what is it? Why the attitude? What do you think’s happening here?”
She turned away, stared out the window. “Just get it over with.”
“Get what over with?” She was confusing the shit out of him.
Her gaze snapped back. “End it. Finish whatever the hell we’ve been doing here. You got what you wanted, right? Me in your bed. Now you’re done with me. There’s no need to pretend that you want to carry this further. I’ve even given you an easy out. I smashed your window. Your place looks like Frosty the Freakin’ Snowman took a dump on it. Doesn’t that piss you off?”
Something inside his chest coiled tight. “What did you just say?” His voice came out rough, pure gravel.
“Doesn’t that piss you off?”
He shook his head slowly. “No. The other thing.”
She swallowed, that slender throat working. “I said a lot of things. You’re going to have to spell it out for me.”
“I got what I wanted, and I’m done with you?” In the past? Any other woman? Yeah, he would have been done. He would have walked away without a backward glance.
But none of those women had been Rusty West.
Her gaze finally met his, full of challenge. “That’s the truth isn’t it?”
She was exquisite, full of fire and attitude, talented as hell. Yet he realized in that moment she was so insecure, so afraid that she wasn’t worth the effort, that she’d decided to push him away rather than risk getting hurt. She saw him with another woman and immediately thought the worst, thought that he could move on to the next and not look back.
He’d figured out early on that wouldn’t be possible with Rusty. Tonight he also realized she could never know about his plan to try to take her business from her. If she ever found out, she’d never forgive him. Never trust him again. As tough as she tried to act, it was just that, an act. She was fragile, needed to be treated with care. It was there, shining from her eyes, the wariness, the disappointment. The pain.
She actually believed the bullshit she’d just spouted.
Like hell he would let her go. He thought he could, but it was too late for that. “No. It’s not the fucking truth.”
She actually flinched. “What?”
“I told you what I wanted. I laid it all out for you. I told you I wanted to give us a shot. Do I have to go over it again? Is there something that you didn’t understand?”
“No. But I…”
“What? You thought I was lying to get you in my bed? That I’d screw around on you without a second thought?”
“I…ah…”
Possessiveness reared up inside him, a dark energy simmering just below the surface as his next words formed in his head. “Someone hurt you. I can see it. You show me every time you clam up, try to push me away. Who hurt you, baby?”
Her eyes widened, and she shook her head. “No…that’s not it…”
“Tell me.” Taking the seat beside her, he hauled her into his lap, then gripped her chin, tipping her face up to his. “I’m not playing with you, Rusty. No one reacts the way you just did without some shit in your past. I know that better than anyone. I want us to move forward, but I need to know what I’m dealing with here. I need to know how to show you I’m in this for the long haul.”
“You are?” she whispered.
“What the fuck have I been telling you?”
She rested her hand on his bicep. “Right. I’m sorry.”
“So you’ll talk to me?”
Laying her head on his chest, she nodded against his pec, melting into him, soft and sweet, dropping that barrier. “Okay.”
“I’m listening.”
Her swallow was audible, but then she finally started talking. Thank God.
“I had a major crush on this guy at school, Brian Jamison. I never told anyone but Piper and Alex. I guess it was hard to hide. They pegged me right off. I’d start blushing and stuttering whenever he was around.” She wriggled on his lap, getting comfortable. “I had a reputation at high school. Some of the guys called me a cock tease, frigid, ice queen. You know, that kind of thing. I learned from a fairly young age my looks got me attention, whether I wanted it or not. I hated it. I’ve always hated it. People don’t tend to look any deeper, you know? So I never went on dates or favored any one guy.”
He rubbed her back, encouraging her to carry on. He had an idea where this was going and could already feel his blood pressure starting to boil over. “Keep going, Foxy.”
“Anyway, I liked Brian more than I’d ever liked any other guy. For the first time I wanted to be noticed, I wanted him to see me, get to know me. Our senior prom was coming up and a few guys had asked me out, but I wasn’t interested in any of them. So, nervous out of my mind, I got up the courage to ask him to go with me. He said yes right away. I was excited, really happy that he liked me too.”
Of course he did. Little asswipe.
“Prom night came, and we all went. We had a blast…then afterward Brian took me to the hotel he’d booked for us, and me being naive and, I thought, in love, followed blindly. He started kissing me as soon as we got in the door, no small talk, then onto the bed. It was embarrassing and rushed. He made no attempt to prepare me and just pulled off my underwear, pushing inside me before I was ready. It wasn’t only embarrassing, it hurt as well, and not just for the obvious reason.”
Every muscle in his body went rock solid. He was sure plenty of teenage girls had similar stories, assholes that treated them like shit, but this was Rusty, his Rusty, and the thought of anyone treating her that way turned him inside out.
“He finished a few minutes later. I…” He could actually feel her cringing against his chest. “I tried to wrap my arms around him. I thought he loved me. But he jumped off the bed, did up his pants, and ran to the door, flinging it open. His friends poured in and cheered. High fives were exchanged followed by…money.”
“What?” He growled, a dangerous edge to his voice.
She lifted her head, looking him in the eye. “It was a bet. To see if he could take the ice queen’s virginity. Thankfully, Alex and Piper were at a party in the same hotel, heard the noise, and ran over. Alex went ape-shit and smacked Brian over the head with a chair, and the guys took off.” She rested her head on his chest again. “That was my introduction to sex and relationships. My mother cheating on my father and leaving us a few years before had already skewed my ideas about love and lasting commitment. I guess that’s why I don’t date. Silly, I know. It was a long time ago, and I should’ve gotten over it already.” He felt her slim shoulders shrug. “But I don’t trust easily. It’s kind of hard when the person you trusted most in the world left you behind without a second glance, then the first guy you ever liked, took your virginity on a bet.”
He’d learned more about her and how her mind worked in the last few minutes than he had in the last couple of weeks. Now he understood her hesitation, her wariness.
Reid tightened his arms around her. “There’s nothing silly about any of it. That asshole treated you like shit when he should have treated you like gold. That’s his loss. As for your mother, she missed out big time. That was her mistake, and I can guarantee one day she’ll regret her decision to cut her kids out of her life.” He kissed the top of her head. “But you gotta know. I won’t fuck you over that way, ever. We give this our best shot. If it works out, it works out. If it doesn’t, we part ways like adults. But, Foxy, you gotta talk to me. If I piss you off, you tell me. You talk to me about it. You don’t throw a rock through my window, and you sure as fuck don’t try to hit me.”
She winced, all color draining from her face. “Oh, God. I’m sorry…after your father…” She slid her hands up either side of this neck. “You didn’t deserve it. I let my temper get the better of me. I can’t believe I did that.”
“I get it, babe. But this is finished now. We put it behind us?” She nodded, and he slid his fingers into her silky, red hair, tipping her head back. “Now enough talking for tonight. I want that mouth.”
She grinned. Then his woman wrapped her arms around his neck and kissed the hell out of him.