Trying to protect Lucy from the inevitable was, by all intents and purposes, a complete waste of time. 

Under normal circumstances I would have appreciated her concern. She just couldn’t let go, and I was running out of excuses. The black maelstrom where stress and anger resided grew exponentially. I tried my best to cover it up, at least whenever we were alone. 

Things were different at the office, however. My phones kept ringing. People called me for the most absurd reasons and accomplished nothing other than take a permanent residence on my nerves.

The only call I wasn’t expecting came from Reynolds senior himself. He’d heard the news, it seemed. He sounded livid, and my guess was he mentioned it to Lucy as well. 

When she alerted me her father was waiting on line two, her tone had an undeniable sheen of anger. I still thanked her and picked up the phone, dreading the conversation that would soon take place.

“Is that how you want to play the game, Harris?” Reynolds’ voice sounded weak and distant, suddenly having lost his signature vigor due to the passing of time.

“I have no say in the matter, believe it or not. For what it’s worth, I opposed it,” I replied, rubbing my temple with my free hand. 

He didn’t believe me, obviously. He had no reason to. “Save  it. It saddens me to see your family’s honor followed your father to the grave.”

I  hung up. There were so many things I could have said, but chose not to out of respect towards Lucy. He still had a point, however. The honor he took pride in having was just another failsafe mechanism that prevented his company from actually turning a profit. Reynolds didn’t push forward and instead chose to err on the old and reliable ways of the past. It just wasn’t feasible anymore.

I slumped in my chair and reveled in the brief moment of respite I got before another Reynolds — Lucy, naturally — decided to show up. This one I normally would be glad to have around despite everything, though she didn’t look amused in the slightest.

“When were you planning on telling me?” She asked, her eyes shooting wide open as her nostrils flared. Anger, a rare sight on Lucy’s face.

“I don’t know. I hoped it wouldn’t happen,” I declared. I had no reason to lie to her.

She rolled her eyes and craned her neck towards the window, avoiding my gaze. “Alex, please. I’ve heard you talk shit about my father’s company on a regular basis for months!”

“Yeah. But—” She interrupted me, turning around suddenly. Her eyes narrowed onto me as if she were sighting a rifle.

“But what? I may have issues with him but that doesn’t mean you can just —” Repaying her in kind, I interrupted her before she had the chance to go off on a tangent. 

“Hear me out. I was just trying to protect you. The board of directors is in on it. Ours and his. They’ve known for a while, now,” I explained, standing up. 

I took a step towards her and she didn’t seem to react. “So is it over then? My father’s company?” Her question sounded hollow. Lucy knew well enough how those things worked, after all.

I took a deep breath. “The problem here is your father,” I declared. Lucy’s eyes darted up to meet mine. “The only way to stop it would be a change of leadership.”

“My father would rather die than appoint someone else…” She admitted, finally starting to relax. The anger seemingly faded away from her visage, at least on the surface.

“Unless it stays in the family. Which is why I kept it from you. I know you loathe the idea of taking over, but…” I let it trail off. The short lived silence filled the air and spoke for both of us.

“But there’s no other way, is there? It would destroy him to see his life’s accomplishments go up in smoke!” Lucy exclaimed, rage bubbling up to the surface again even if just for a brief moment.

I nodded weakly.“For what it’s worth, I was against it.”

Lucy didn’t say anything, and just stared out of the window for a while. I was mad at myself for not being able to fix the situation before it blew up, though I couldn’t have done much even if I tried harder.

She left my office without saying a word. That morning left a bad taste in my mouth. Nothing a few drinks couldn’t wash away.

The rest of that day was a boring blur. Even the calls stopped, thankfully. 

The monotony of my days made time appear faster than normal, and before I realized it, I found myself sitting in my car as James drove me home. Lucy had left an hour before me, and while I hadn’t seen her face since that morning, I could tell she wasn’t doing so great. We were on the same sinking boat, honestly. 

The air felt heavy and cold. Nothing out of the ordinary for New York. It covered me like a heavy blanket and somehow felt oppressive. As if the air itself didn’t want to enter my lungs.

James hadn’t made any comment on it, and usually the weather was his first topic of choice when it came down to small talk. He noticed I wasn’t in the mood, and in truth I hadn’t been for quite some time. I both appreciated and loathed his silence. A boon and a curse.

Something had happened to me. Perhaps I let it or maybe it just snuck up on me, exploiting an unguarded weakness in the walls I raised long ago. I couldn’t tell, though it hardly even mattered. I needed to pick myself up again and push forward, consequences be damned. 

The roadblock that prevented me from doing so had a name and a lovely face. I couldn’t simply  — and metaphorically — run her over, though I feared I would have to. That conclusion saddened me more than I let on.

More than a million people lived in Manhattan alone. Why did it have to be her? Why and how, out of all people, did I end up getting so deeply involved with her? I knew deep down it would come around to bite me in the ass, and like clockwork, my predictions became true.

Perhaps shielding her from the news hadn’t been a great idea after all, even if I had good intentions. I couldn’t blame her for the way she reacted, God knows I would have done the same. 

A few years ago I would have laughed at the mere idea of opposing a takeover — especially with Reynolds being the target. Lucy softened me, in a way. I would not have hesitated, even for a second. Burn everything, salt the earth. Fuck the consequences and fuck whoever was under my talons. Yet that was long ago. Looking back, I couldn’t recognize myself.

I stared out the window of the car as it slowly came to a stop at a red light. A never ending stream of people crowded the busy sidewalks, and even more populated the vast array of venues the city had to offer. And I picked her.

Reynolds senior’s words also made quite a few appearances in my thoughts that night. The honor I was expected to possess did in fact end up in a grave with my dear old father, exactly like plenty of other “unnecessary” things, as he put it.

I remember the notary office my sister and I were summoned to. A man like David Harris couldn’t leave a small testament, after all. It contained a few surprises. 

The frail old man behind the desk I sat in front of wore thick glasses he kept adjusting while reading. 

My sister stormed out of his office when she heard he wanted me to take over the company instead of her, instead of his beloved daughter who’d spent her entire life waiting for that very moment.

My father chose me. The man who never once expressed the desire to follow the family way. I guess that was part of the reason that drew me to Lucy in the first place. Her defiance, her will to forge her own path and walk it even if took her through hell. Deep down I just wanted her not to follow the same route I was forced to take.

The damage it could do was quite staggering. I used to be a completely different person. I despised alcohol, for starters. Funny how things change.

My sister should have been at the helm of the company, no questions asked. She resented me because of that. I couldn’t quite hold it against her, though after some time I stopped caring.

It was clear I wasn’t cut out for the job. I had to learn quick and improvise what I couldn’t learn. Things eventually started to click, and from then on it was all a game of appearance. The fundraisers came to mind, for example. Nobody wanted to be there, it was all a show. Everybody knew, and still played their part in that pathetic game.

I tried to steer away from that, but the claws of that dreadful world dragged me deeper into it than I would have wanted. 

I couldn’t back away from it all despite wanting nothing more. I made my money, enough of it to be able to live like a king until my dying breath. But what good is a king without a queen?