Dex was pacing the living room when Tarek entered, and he stopped short to glare at him. The scent of Braun’s arousal drenched the place.

“Where have you been?” Dex asked. “Braun’s going nuts in there.”

Tarek stared blankly at the bedroom door. “I’ve been gone less than four hours.”

“Yeah, well, this time he got up an hour after you left, genius. He needs you.”

“Shit.” Tarek sprinted across the room. The knob turned but the door didn’t budge.

He’d been locked out.

Tarek banged on the wood with an open palm. “Braun, it’s me. I’m back. Please, let me in.”

“You left me!” The wail in Braun’s voice shattered Tarek heart into pieces.

“Oh, sweetheart, I didn’t want to. I had to help someone else, but I’m here for you now. Let me in so I can help you.”

“No. I can handle this one myself.”

Tarek rested his forehead against the door. His sweet, stubborn, firecracker omega was angry, and not even the lust-craze of a heat surge was overriding that anger. “A dildo isn’t the same and you know it. Please don’t suffer because of me, Braun. Please.”

“You. Weren’t. Here!”

All three words struck his chest like bullets and they might as well have been. Braun had needed him, and Tarek hadn’t been there, as he promised he would be. He’d betrayed his omega’s trust when he’d only just earned it. Yes, he’d participated in a search that saved the lives of four teenage betas, but he hadn’t had to be there. Someone would have found that storage room with the boys eventually.

You can’t be sure of that. You saved their lives tonight.

Sure, he’d saved lives, but what if he’d lost his omega just as he’d finally found him? Tarek wasn’t sure he could live without Braun.

* * *

“What the hell is the matter with you?” Serge yelled before he’d even shut the front door. He stomped into the kitchen where Tarek and Dex were chopping vegetables for a stir fry.

Well, Dex was doing most of the chopping while Tarek supervised. He didn’t have the physical coordination to slice peppers into proper strips while his omega was suffering ten feet away and refusing to let him help.

Tarek growled in Serge’s general direction, but didn’t hassle him for using that tone on an alpha. The anger was completely deserved.

Serge got right up in his face, pointy finger and all. “You had one job, and that was be there for Braun, and you couldn’t do that? You had to leave for work?! Are you kidding me?”

“Back off a little, babe, he’s miserable about it,” Dex said.

“Not as miserable as Braun is, and that’s a fact.”

“I know,” Tarek said. “You don’t think I can feel him right now? He’s angry with me, and he’s suffering, but he’s too stubborn to let me in, and I hate myself for it. But I helped save four lives today, Serge. Four kidnapped, beaten, abused betas who can go home to their families now.”

Serge squinted at him, then took a step back. Folded his arms over his chest. “I’m still pissed at you.”

“I’m still pissed at me, too, believe me. I helped those kids, but I betrayed my omega in the process.” Tarek swallowed a frustrated whine. “Braun still has hours left in his heat, and I don’t know what to do.”

“When was the last time he ate?”

Tarek glanced at the microwave clock. “About six hours ago now.”

“Fine. Finish cooking whatever it is you’re doing, and I’ll take it to him. Try and talk some sense into him.”

“Thank you.” He loved knowing that Braun and Serge had their own friendship. If anyone could get through to Braun right now, it was Serge.

That wasn’t completely true, though. Kell was the best person to talk to Braun, but Kell was stuck in his own personal nightmare, and Tarek had no idea how to save the young, abused omega. He’d contacted an acquaintance to see if he could trace the adoption of Kell’s baby, but so far, there were no leads, which suggested black market.

And if Krause had used the black market to sell his baby, it was the opening Tarek needed to arrest the bastard. But first he needed proof.

“The kidnapped betas are going to be okay?” Serge said after a few minutes of silent cooking.

“So far, so good,” Tarek replied. “I’ve been getting updates. They’ve all been reunited with their families, and they’ve given brief statements but…they’ll all need counseling. Probably for a long time.”

“They were just kids,” Dex said. He stirred the wok hard enough to send a piece of onion flying onto the counter. “Youngest was fifteen.”

“Fuck.” Serge came up behind Dex and wrapped his arms around his waist.

The simple domesticity of the pair made Tarek’s heart ache. He wanted that with Braun so badly. To share meals and cook and watch television after a long day at work. To support each other during the bad times and celebrate the good times. He needed his omega to trust him again.

Tarek fetched beers for his friends and a soda for himself. They ate in near silence, no one in the mood to make small talk while so many terrible things lingered in the air. After he finished, Tarek made a tray for Braun with the rest of the steak stir fry, juice, and a bar of chocolate. Braun liked the super-dark kind best, he’d discovered.

Serge took the tray and went to the bedroom. Knocked and called out. It took a long time for Braun to undo the locks, and Tarek went out to the porch to avoid his omega’s strong scent. He stared up at the night sky and wished on a star for Braun’s safety. Serge was a great friend, but Tarek was Braun’s alpha. Tarek was supposed to be taking care of his omega.

And he’d failed.

The front door opened and shut.

“I don’t deserve him,” Tarek said.

“Yes, you do,” Dex replied. “You’re both upset right now, but you do deserve each other. From the moment you laid eyes on him, I saw it. But you’re at different places in your lives, and you’re coming at this mating thing with different perspectives on it. Braun’s afraid of ending up like his brother, and you’re scared you can’t make Braun happy.”

“He’s miserable right now because of me.”

“Because of a choice you made, yes, but not because of you. You are a wonderful person, Tarek, and he knows that. But he’s also stubborn as hell, and he’s hurt. The heat isn’t helping him make rational choices, and he’s punishing himself as much as he’s punishing you.”

“I hate that he’s punishing himself. I need to make it better, damn it. That’s my job.”

“Yeah, well, sometimes we all suck at our jobs.”

Tarek glanced at is friend, curious if Dex was speaking about his job in a literal sense, or about his relationship with Serge. “Serge told me about him hating me when you two first met.”

Dex snorted. “I know, he mentioned it. I’m lucky every day of my life that he lets me keep loving him.”

“Because of nursing school?”

“No, because of how I reacted when he told me what happened. You’d think I was an alpha, for how enraged and possessive I got. I scared him, but we talked. I calmed down. I did not go track the guy down and murder him, like I said I would.”

“I know the feeling.” If Krause had so much as put his hand on Braun’s dick, Tarek would have killed him where he stood.

“And that’s why you’ll make this work. You and Braun make sense, the same way me and Serge make sense.”

Tarek sighed. “If we were fighting on a normal day, this wouldn’t hurt so much, I don’t think, but he’s suffering through his heat alone, and I can’t stand it.” He grabbed the porch railing and squeezed, needing to break something to release a bit of his anger.

“Maybe Serge will create a miracle and talk some sense into Braun.”

“Maybe.”

Serge didn’t emerge for a full hour after he went into the bedroom, and he absolutely reeked of Braun’s slick when he did. Tarek stayed across the room from him, his only consolation the empty tray and juice glass. At least Braun was eating, keeping up his strength.

“He got through it,” Serge said as he washed the dishes. “But he’ll have at least one more surge before the heat is finally over.”

Tarek resisted the urge to stomp his foot in frustration. “He still won’t see me?”

“You didn’t come up in conversation at all.”

“What?”

Serge turned, a soapy washrag in one hand. “He needed to get through the surge, and now he’s resting. He’s eaten. He can think more clearly. Try talking to him again in a little while.”

Tarek didn’t like it, but Serge was right. At least someone in the house could be the voice of reason.

“Figure out how to fix this,” Serge said. “We’re going home.”

“We are?” Dex asked.

“Yes. The only thing that’s going to rid my mind of watching Braun fuck himself silly on a dildo is going home and getting my dick in you.”

Dex grinned. “Sounds like fun.”

Tarek grimaced. A dick in his ass didn’t sound like a lot of fun to him, but he’d also never given much thought to who fucked who when it came to beta relationships. “Thank you, guys, for everything,” he said.

Once they left, he finished cleaning the kitchen, but that didn’t take nearly enough time. He had the rest of the afternoon staring back at him and an omega who needed him, but refused to let Tarek help. Serge told him to fix this, but he didn’t fucking know how.

No, that wasn’t entirely true. He rummaged in a drawer for a piece of paper and a pen, then sat at the kitchen table to write.

Dear Braun,

My heart aches for your pain and in knowing you feel betrayed by me. I promised to be here for you through your heat, and I broke that promise. There are no words in our language to truly express how sorry I am for betraying your trust, so all I have are the words that do exist: I’m sorry. I’m so truly sorry for hurting you, my omega. My firecracker. I love you, and all I want to do is make this right.

I want our life to be together. I want to truly mate with you one day and to make you mine. I want to save Kell for you, and to find a way to give him the happy life he deserves. Most of all I want to make you happy. But if your choice is to never forgive me, I will accept that. I will mourn our lost potential forever, but I will accept it. And I’ll be heartbroken, but I’ll also know that my choice to betray you saved the lives of four teenagers, who otherwise would have suffered a fate as awful as your brother, only to have their young lives cut short by violent men.

I love you, Braun, and I’m so sorry I hurt you. So sorry.

Tarek.

It wasn’t poetry, but it was honest. Tarek slid the note under the door, and then knocked. “Braun? If you’re awake, please read this. If it’s the last thing you ever do for me, please let it be this.”

The floorboards creaked. The paper whispered. Braun’s scent grew stronger.

Tarek’s heart slammed into his ribs as he waited.

“What do you mean about the teenagers?” Braun asked after a long, painful silence.

“The investigation is still ongoing,” Tarek replied, stupidly happy to be talking, “but we raided a factory today and found four beta teens chained in a storeroom. They were being used as sex slaves in a kind of brothel. Drugged and chained into place, so anonymous men could have their way with them.”

“Fuck. Are they okay?”

“No, but they’re free.”

“They’re free like Kell isn’t.” Braun sobbed once. “Fuck.”

Tarek pressed both palms to the door, wishing he had claws to tear it down and comfort his omega. “I’ll find a way to help Kell somehow, I promise. Anything for you. I’m so sorry, Braun.”

“You can’t leave again. You can’t.”

“I won’t.”

“Tarek.” The locks turned.

Tarek stepped back from the door as it swung open. Braun’s strong scent smacked him in the face, and then Braun leapt into his arms, dressed only in a long t-shirt that barely covered his private bits. Tarek laughed in delight. His omega was back in his arms where he belonged. Tarek scooped him up and carried him to bed. He flung the dildo across the room, hating it for its very existence, because his omega never should have needed it. All he needed was Tarek.

Braun brought him down for a long, harsh kiss that only broke for the few moments necessary to get them both naked. To fumble for a condom and get it on. Braun wasn’t in a surge, but he was still slick and needy, and Tarek slid home, into his omega where he belonged.

* * *

They knotted twice that afternoon, and as the day waned into evening, Braun’s scent changed. His erection finally went down, and with the pheromone loss, Tarek’s own cock finally lost its state of constant arousal. Oh, he still wanted Braun, but the mating urge that came with heat was gone.

Braun rolled over in bed and slung an arm across Tarek’s chest. “It’s finally over.”

Tarek pinched his ass. “Don’t sound so relieved. Is me fucking you truly so awful.”

“No, you jerk, but it’s pretty humiliating to have your ass dripping for two days straight and begging for sex. I hate not being able to control my body.”

“I can imagine.” He ruffled his fingers through Braun’s damp hair. “You feel up to a shower?”

“Definitely. A shower, some food, and then I want to sleep through the night, and not wake up until, like, noon tomorrow.”

“I think we can do that. I have one more day of leave before I have to return to work.”

Braun rose up on one elbow so he was looking down at Tarek. His cheeks were still flushed, but his eyes were softer, less wild. “Thank you.”

“You never have to thank me for helping you through a heat. I acted like an asshole and left, and you gave me a great gift in forgiving me.”

“Well, I haven’t totally forgiven you, but I’m getting there. But I wouldn’t have gotten through this without you.”

“Now that the heat is over, I’d like to talk about our future.”

Braun frowned. “After we shower and sit down with food. I’m too hungry to have a rational conversation.”

“Deal.”

In only two days, they’d developed a showering routine of Tarek rinsing Braun down, and then very thoroughly scrubbing his entire body, paying extra attention to certain parts. Unlike the constantly aroused state of a heat, neither of them got much more than a semi during the shower, and that was fine. They needed to talk, not fuck.

Tarek stuck a frozen pizza in the oven; he didn’t have enough of any one thing to cook up a decent meal, but he did have some mushrooms and peppers to add to the pizza, as well as a dose of garlic powder. Then he allowed himself to indulge in a beer.

Braun wrinkled his nose at the offer of one. “Beer’s gross.”

“How do you know?”

“I snuck a drink out of my dad’s can once. Yuck.”

“Suit yourself.” He poured Braun orange juice. “Here, get your blood sugar back up.”

All the windows were open to air out the house, and a chilly breeze crept in. Tarek fetched them both sweatshirts. He loved seeing Braun swallowed up by his bigger clothes.

They settled at the kitchen table with their drinks. “It’s nice being able to think clearly again,” Braun said. He sipped at his juice. “Food tastes good again, too.”

Tarek absorbed that interesting tidbit. “Food doesn’t taste the same during heat?”

“No and it sucks, because I’m ravenous all the time, but food mostly tastes awful. I think that’s why alphas are so attentive during heat, to make sure we’re eating and getting enough calories, so we aren’t totally exhausted at the end. I mean, I’m still exhausted, but I think I burn more calories, too.”

“The burning calories makes sense, but not the taste thing.”

Braun shrugged, but his cheeks reddened. “Biologically, it makes sense. Our bodies use the same passage for sex as for, you know, waste. So it’s the body’s way of saying don’t eat, you need that for other stuff.”

“Oh.” Tarek blushed and tried to hide behind his beer can. He’d never given much thought to how an omega’s anatomy adapted for the needs of heat and intercourse.

“That’s the gross stuff no one talks about in anatomy class,” Braun said with a wink.

“I suppose. It isn’t gross, it’s simply…unusual.”

“Yeah, well, being omega is pretty damned unusual. We have to deal with all of the physical shit the other genders don’t.”

“Oh, to have the simple life of a beta, right?” Tarek’s mind flashed to those teen victims, and he flinched. “Or not.”

“Do you have any updates on the case?”

“Nothing I can legally share, except to say they have several suspects, and the location may be tied to a larger trafficking operation in multiple cities.”

“Ugh, that’s terrible.”

“Yeah. But we found that parlor, and it’s a start. Hopefully, our investigation is enough to bring these bastards down for good.”

“I hope so. Goddess, with the heat I haven’t even thought about the halfway house. Anything new there?”

Tarek shook his head. “Nothing new, but they’re still being investigated. We’re trying to figure out a way to get one of our officers in as a potential alpha visitor, but Fynn is smart and paranoid, so it isn’t easy.”

“I know I was furious with you earlier about you leaving,” Braun said, “but now I understand, and I’m glad you saved those four betas. Really glad.”

“Thank you. Does this mean you aren’t mad anymore?”

“Yes. I’m officially no longer pissed at you.”

Tarek grinned, then reached out to clutch Braun’s hand. “I’m glad. And if it helps at all, Serge chewed my ears off about it.”

“Good for him. They’re amazing friends, especially Serge.”

“Yeah, they are.” They both seemed to be skirting around the larger issue surrounding them, so Tarek jumped in with both feet. “I want to mate with you, Braun. I meant what I said before. I want you in my bed. I want to create a life together, the two of us.”

Braun’s eyes shuttered, his expression guarded. “I want that too, but it’s too soon.”

Tarek’s heart didn’t know whether it should jump for joy, or cry in frustration. “What part is too soon?”

“Living together. And we obviously can’t officially mate until my next heat, but we can date each other. Really get to know each other. Have normal, non-heat-crazed sex?”

The way he phrased the sex part as a question was all kinds of endearing. Tarek pulled Braun out of his chair and onto Tarek’s lap. “We can do all that, especially the sex part.”

“Yeah?” Braun grinned, his face lighting with joy. “I feel the bond we created, Tarek, and it scares me a lot, but I feel good when I’m with you. Protected. You’re my alpha, and I can’t deny that. I don’t want to deny it. I’m just not ready to jump into living together.”

“I completely understand.” Tarek didn’t like the idea of Braun living anywhere except here, but his omega needed special care right now, and if that meant living apart for a while, Tarek would accept it.

He’d hate it, but he’d accept it. Anything for Braun.

“I’m glad you understand,” Braun said with a crooked smile, “because I’m not even sure I do. I’m just trying to do what feels right.”

“Same. I’m new at this, too, in case you’ve forgotten. I’ve never had a relationship before.”

“At least you’ve seen a good one in action with Dex and Serge. I don’t have the best examples in my life, other than them.”

“Then we’ll do this our own way. We’ve already bonded, and our scents mingled enough during your heat that no other alpha can try to claim you, which gives us time. Three months to get to know each other, to create a life we like, and then we can decide if you’re ready to mate during your next heat. How does that sound?”

“It sounds like a dream come true.”

Braun’s smile faded, and Tarek didn’t have to ask to know he was thinking of Kell. He squeezed Braun’s hand tighter. “I also meant my other promise, that I’d do something to help Kell. I don’t know what exactly, but I’ll help him. I swear.”

“Thank you. It’s hard letting myself be this happy when I know how miserable my brother is.”

“I know. But you are allowed to be happy. Kell would want you to be happy, wouldn’t he?”

“Yes. He would. He loves hearing me talk about you, and I’m sure he fell in love with you a little bit when you came to my rescue that day.”

Tarek bit back a growl at his memory of finding Braun hurt and bleeding on that bedroom floor, with Krause nearby cradling his junk. “I don’t want to think about that right now. Let’s think about the future.”

The timer dinged for the pizza. Braun sprung up to get it, probably out of some ingrained omega need to serve his alpha, but Tarek gently pushed him back into his chair. Tarek would proudly serve dinner to his omega, tonight and every night thereafter.

Always.