Chapter 5
Natalia
My cell phone rang as I was about to descend the stairs to catch a train back downtown. Seeing it was Anna, I backed up to the sidewalk so I wouldn’t lose service. I wasn’t in a hurry to get back home.
“Hey, Mrs. Weiner.”
She sighed. “Will you ever be able to say my new last name without cracking up?”
“I wouldn’t count on it. I still can’t believe you gave up Anna B. Goodwin to become Anna B. a Weiner.”
“I’m ignoring your curmudgeonly commentary because I’m in wedded bliss.”
“Curmudgeonly commentary? Your new husband’s vernacular is rubbing off on you.”
She laughed. “I’m on the way to the airport for our flight to Aruba, but wanted to run something by you.”
“What’s up?”
“Hunter is bugging my husband for your phone number. He says you gave it to him, but must have entered it wrong. Did you enter it wrong?”
“Nope. I entered the right number…to reach Eden.”
“Eden? Don’t tell me you’re still giving out phone-sex numbers at twenty-eight years old.”
“Of course not.”
“Then who is Eden?”
“She’s an escort who happens to have a very similar number to mine.”
Anna sighed. “So I take it you don’t want Hunter to have your phone number?”
“He’s a playboy who lives three-thousand miles away. What’s the point?”
“I guess. Although he’s actually a great guy. I thought you guys had a lot of chemistry.”
“Playing with chemistry leads to explosions.”
“Fine. Derek won’t give him your number—even though he’s been bugging him for days.” She exhaled. “How’s Izzy doing? Did she enjoy her week with her grandmother?”
“She said she’s never going back. I hate to admit it, but it made me feel a little better that she despises her, too.”
“You two needed this break.”
My stepdaughter, Isabella, has been living with me for two years now. Well, technically, I guess you could say she’s lived with me for three, since Garrett and I had full custody after his ex-wife died. Izzy lost her mother to cancer in seventh grade. Then, mid-eighth grade—October 31st, to be exact—she lost a second parent. Only this time, it wasn’t to illness. In the middle of the Halloween party we were hosting, my husband was arrested for running a Ponzi scheme at his prestigious investment firm. He was wearing a pirate costume at the time—irony at its finest.
“Yeah, we needed the break. She’s been somewhat civil to me since I got home. But that’ll change. Sunday is visiting day. Her crankiness usually ratchets up for a week after visiting Garrett. And this month, I wrote him a letter asking him to tell her she was getting pulled from private school after this year because I can’t afford it anymore. So she should be especially unhappy.”
Our monthly pilgrimages upstate were always difficult. Since New York state didn’t allow unaccompanied minors to visit inmates, I had to see my ex-husband every month, just so his daughter who hates me could visit with her dear old dad.
“You’re going to heaven for taking her to visit him once a month.”
“I hope not. It’ll be lonely without you there.”
She laughed. “I gotta run. We’re pulling up to the terminal.”
“Have a great trip! Don’t get pregnant. I’m not ready to be an aunt yet.”
“Says the woman who has custody of a fifteen year old.”
“Umm…you just made my point.”
“Love you. I’ll call you when I’m back.”
“Love you, too, Anna B. a Weiner.”
***
“Mrs. Lockwood?” the prison guard manning the desk called without looking up from his clipboard.
“You ready?” I turned to Izzy.
She pulled her earbuds from her ears and went to throw her stuff in a locker. While I always left any banned items in the car, Izzy couldn’t be without her earbuds for the short wait to see her father. God forbid I try to strike up a conversation with her. She kept the things in her ears twenty-four-seven, like most kids her age.
I walked to the sergeant at the desk. It was a guy I’d never seen before. “I’m Natalia Rossi, visiting for Garrett Lockwood. You called for Mrs. Lockwood, but my name is Rossi now.”
He flipped through some papers in his clipboard. “List of approved visitors says Natalia Lockwood, wife. Are you not her?”
“Yes. Well, no. I was when I first started visiting. But we’re divorced now, and I go by Natalia Rossi—like the license I showed you and the name I signed in with.”
“You should tell the inmate to update the list of names.”
I did, every time I came. But the asshole refused to write my name without his last name.
“Isn’t there a form I can fill out myself?”
“Only the inmate can request visitor approval.”
Great. Whatever.
“I would have kept Lockwood anyway,” Izzy said from behind me. I hadn’t realized she’d finished up with the locker. “It’s a better last name than Rossi.”
I bit my tongue to keep from responding that even Weiner would be a better last name than that of a lying thief. Izzy and I were led to a room where a few other visitors waited, and eventually they brought us all to the family visiting room. Garrett was already seated at a table. He stood when he saw us and flashed the dazzling smile that had swindled hundreds of investors out of millions and me out of my pants and dignity.
His eyes were trained on me as we walked, even though his daughter was practically running to greet him. She wrapped her arms around him for the brief embrace allowed at the beginning and end of a visit. In that moment, the vulnerable girl she really was shined through. Izzy did her best to act tough, with an I-don’t-give-a-shit-about-anything attitude, but inside, a big part of her was still a little girl who’d lost her mother and her father. She idolized Garrett, even with all that he’d done.
After she released him, he attempted to physically greet me. I took a step back out of his reach and nodded. “Hello, Garrett.”
He frowned. “Hello, Nat. You look beautiful.”
“I’m going to grab a drink. Do you want something, Izzy?”
She didn’t even turn around to respond. “No.”
The rules required a minor to be accompanied by a guardian. It didn’t require me to sit at the same table as my ex-husband. I was here for his daughter, whether she appreciated what it took for me to come each month or not. I walked to the vending machine and bought a bottle of water before taking a seat at a small, vacant table on the other side of the room.
During the hour, I glanced over at Garrett and Izzy a few times to check on her. I hated that once my eyes lingered on his face for a minute. I hadn’t even realized I was doing it. Even after two years in prison, sallowed skin, and dark circles under his eyes, he was still an incredibly beautiful man. But I’d learned the hard way that a beautiful face is nothing when you have an ugly heart.
When the guard called the end of visiting hours, I walked back to Izzy. I could have waited at the door, but I never wanted her to have to walk away alone.
Garrett used every hello and goodbye as an opportunity to manipulate me. “Can I have a word alone with Nat, Izzy? We need to talk about some finances.”
I waited until his daughter was out of earshot. “Did you tell her?”
“The timing wasn’t right.”
My eyes widened. “You get one hour a month. You don’t have the luxury of timing.”
His eyes dropped to my collarbone. “Remember when we were on our honeymoon and you—”
I interrupted him. “We’re not walking down memory lane. Come back to reality. You’re about to walk back to your eight-by-eight. You need to tell your daughter that you drained her tuition fund. I can’t afford twenty-five thousand dollars for her private school next year.”
“I’m working on something.”
I scowled. “From prison? Don’t make me tell her. She hates me enough as it is. You need to own up to this.”
He reached out for me. I put my hand up. “Don’t. You couldn’t do this one thing for me.”
“I miss you, Nat.” Did he even fucking hear me?
I threw my hands up in the air. “This is pointless.”
Then I turned around and walked my stepdaughter out of the state prison, vowing never to come back...like I did every damn time.