Kayla: Can I come over?
Man, I just cracked open a beer and sat down. Maybe since she’s asking if she can come over, she only wants to kick back and relax. Hope so. I text back with yeah, baby. I can’t say no anyway. I haven’t heard from her since she called me after her classes yesterday and told me about the argument with her mom. That’s not for a lack of trying either.
There’s soon a knock on my door. I answer, beer in hand, and find her on the other side with a tote bag hanging off her shoulder. She looks as if her world’s all lopsided and like she’s in need of a hug.
“Hey, love bug.”
She cracks a smile as I step aside for her to come in. “You are so the person I needed to see. Thanks for letting me to come over.”
“Of course I’ll let you come over, even if you have been avoiding me.”
I catch her rolling her eyes, which is a good sign because she knows I’m teasing her. “It wasn’t on purpose. The shit keeps hitting the fan ever since I talked to you yesterday.” She takes a seat on the couch while I grab her a Coke, and then I sit next to her. “Thanks.”
“Want to talk about it?” I ask.
Kayla sighs. She picks up my arm, lays it across her shoulders, and leans into me. “Let me enjoy a few peaceful moments first.”
I lift my beer to my lips, but hesitate. “You don’t plan on me having to drive us anywhere, do you?” If she does, then I need to get my own Coke instead.
She lifts her head to look at me. “What? No. Go ahead and enjoy your beer. How was your first day at work, by the way?”
“Good! That’s why I’m celebrating with a beer. I think I’ll like it there.”
“That’s good.” She toes out of her shoes and rests her legs on top of mine, which are now propped up on the coffee table.
“What’s in the bag?” I ask.
“Oh, I thought I’d hang here for a bit, but I have schoolwork I need to do, so I brought my stuff. Is that okay?”
“Yeah, I don’t care. You gonna tell me why you’re upset, Kayla?”
She sighs once more. “After I talked to you, I did go see my dad. He gave me the thumbs-up to move in with him. The problem came when I told my mom. I knew they split because they grew apart, but what I didn’t know was that apparently my mom was unhappy for a long time before that. Like, a really long time. So, when she found me packing and realized I was actually going through with it, she went off.” Kayla takes a deep breath. “Mom has a lot of pent-up resentment against my dad. My parents are only thirty-nine.”
“What?” That can’t be right. “I mean, they look youngish, but I didn’t think that was because of their age.”
“Well, it is. They had me when they were nineteen. I always thought they got married because they were high school sweethearts, but based on what Mom said when she exploded, they primarily got married because she was pregnant. Anyway, the point is she seems to be holding this grudge against my dad because she feels like she wasted her life by being married to him. And because of that, she’s, like, hoping her feelings about him will transfer to us. She definitely doesn’t want me to live with him.
“She thinks it’s a mistake. That he doesn’t deserve it. That he works too much for me to stay over there. She said something about how I was choosing him over her. She went on and on and on. Dad had to come over and calm her down, which only served to piss her off some more. I think she would’ve reacted better had I simply told her I was getting my own place.”
I tug her a little closer and take a long draw of my beer. Family drama is something that truly sucks. “I’m sorry, baby.”
“Nothing makes sense to me anymore,” she whispers.
“You don’t have to think about it tonight. You’re with me!” I nudge her chin with my knuckle until she lifts her head and then I kiss her softly. “Get started on your homework. I’ll even help you.”
One of her eyebrows arches. “How are you helping me?”
I smile. “You’ll see.”
Kayla grabs her bag and pulls out a textbook. “I have to read first.” She cracks open the book to one of the chapters and wiggles her body against me in an effort to get comfortable.
“Do you need me to turn the volume down?”
“No, you can leave it.”
She might not know how I’ll “help” her, but her using her finger to track where she’s at will help me know when to “help” her. She reads. I half-watch TV and drink my beer. Once she’s read a few paragraphs, it’s time for a little of my “help.”
“Sugar?” She hums in question as she looks up at me. “Time for me to help.” She looks confused for a moment, but that’s okay. I lean in and kiss her. Her lips form a quick smile before fusing against mine.
How is it that my life completely sucked not too long ago and now, I have a new job and this girl who I never want to stop kissing?
“Why’d you do that for?” I ask when she pulls away before I’m ready to let her.
“How is that helping me?”
“It’s a reward system. You read a few paragraphs, you get a kiss. It’s a motivational tool.”
Kayla seems to think about this for a second. “What happens when I finish reading?”
My grin is quick and devious. “Finish and you’ll find out.”
I’m able to kiss her two more times, each kiss lasting longer than the last, but my phone rings before we can get to the next kiss. I’m relaxed as I reach for it on the end table, thinking it’s probably Dad or Syd, maybe even Carey, though she’s more of a texter and unless she’s having boyfriend trouble, I don’t hear from her that often. Sydney is more likely to hear from her than I am. It might even be another rarity of being a buddy from college.
But it’s none of them.
It’s my mom.
Do I get up and go to another room? Am I prepared to take this call while sitting next to Kayla?
“Logan? Are you going to get that?”
I glance quickly at Kayla and nod. Not a great move to get caught hesitating. Now she’s sneaking peeks at me. “Hey,” I answer.
“Hi, Logan. It’s Mom.”
“Yeah.” Long drag on my beer. I’ll likely need three more when this is over.
“Are you busy?” she asks. “I would like to talk to you for a few minutes.”
“I can spare a few minutes, but only a few; I have company over.” I’ve changed my mind, too. I can’t sit here. After nudging on Kayla so she knows I want to stand, she leans to the side and I get up to retreat to my bedroom.
“First, I want to say I’m sorry for leaving you behind and in the hands of your father.”
“Why be sorry when he took care of me and raised me to be a damn good man?” I say before she can start her next sentence.
“Well, I meant I’m sorry for not being there, too. I’m retired and I feel like I barely know my son.”
“Because you don’t,” I interrupt once again.
Mom continues as if I didn’t. “Which is why I was hoping that maybe you’d like to come out to California to see me.”
Two feelings hit me at once: a sense of being stunned by what she asked and instant anger. The prospect of wasting my breath and letting her know I’m angry and why is unappealing. “No. Is that all?” I respond with all the curtness I can find within myself.
Mom is quiet for five seconds. “But why? I thought you’d want to see me.”
“I don’t have to explain myself to you. Is that all?”
“I guess so.”
“Good talk, Mom. Bye.” I hang up without waiting for her to respond. Unbelievable. Supposedly, she’s finally realized she missed out on a life with her kid, and her first suggestion is that I should get on a plane and fly to see her? Fuck that. If anyone is getting on a plane, it’s her. Forgive me if I don’t think I should have to tell her such a thing, too.
Pacing isn’t helping, so I sit on my bed and text my dad.
Me: She called.
Dad: What’d she say?
Me: That she missed me, but she wanted me to fly out to CA for a visit. Told her no & got off phone ASAP.
Dad: Why’d you say no?
Me: Because she pissed me off.
“Logan?” I glance up to see Kayla standing in the doorway. “Everything okay?”
“Yeah, sweet cheeks. You hungry? I’m hungry. Have you ever been to Bagels and Butts? I can go grab us something while you stay here and work on your schoolwork. What do you want?”
She stares at me. “Don’t want to talk about it, huh?”
Not even answering that. “Bagels and Butts or somewhere else? I don’t feel like cooking, so...”
“Bagels and Butts is fine. Get me whatever you get.”
I nod, walk over to kiss her cheek, and brush past her so I can leave. Maybe I can get all this crap with my mother out of my mind by the time I get back. It just pisses me off that after not hearing from her in about two years, she has this epiphany and I’m expected to be the one to make the trip to see her?
Hell no.
I’m not opposed to a relationship with my mother, but I’ll be damned if I’ll be the one putting in the majority of the effort. That’s her job, especially considering she hasn’t been in my life for so long. The fact that she asked me pisses me off as much as the fact that she didn’t realize what’s wrong with her asking such a thing of me.
What also bothers me is the fact that she talked to my dad prior. Did she tell him about asking me to come to California? And if so, how could he not warn me about that? I wouldn’t have answered her call if I had known, which could be why he didn’t tell me if he knew.
With the way Mom is, after that rejection, she’s likely to give up anyway. I probably won’t hear from her for a long time. For some reason, that’s the thought that relaxes and soothes me. Things are all good in Logan-World until I return to my apartment and find Sydney sitting on the couch next to Kayla.
“What are you doing here?”
“No hello for your favorite stepsister?” she asks.
Considering Kayla looks uncomfortable and two seconds away from bolting out the door, she’s not getting a hello. “You never come over unannounced,” I say.
“I tried calling, but turns out you left your phone here. Can I talk to you for a second?”
My suspicions rise. “About what?”
“Do you want me to take that and get stuff ready?” Kayla asks, pointing to the bag of food, clearly wanting some space.
“Sure.”
She smiles gratefully, gets the bag from me, and takes off for the kitchen. I return my gaze to Sydney.
“Mom called. She and Chris are concerned because your mom called you. They just wanted me to check in.”
My anger spikes. My arm swings out to point to the door. “Go home, Syd. Next time, tell them I’m a big boy and I can handle my emotional breakdowns on my own, okay?”
She frowns, opens her mouth, but I point to the door again. “Okay,” she finally says as she stands. I give her a hug before she leaves because it’s not like I’m mad at her and she didn’t do anything wrong. My sigh once I close the door is one of relief. Time to walk into the kitchen and face Kayla. Man, she hasn’t seen a good side of my life today.
She takes a bite out of her sandwich, leaning one hip against the counter, when I walk into the kitchen.
“You started eating without me?”
“I’m hungry. Plus, I didn’t know how long that standoff between you two was going to last. You don’t mind, do you? Don’t you want your girl’s stomach full and satisfied? Otherwise, I’ll be cranky.”
I smile and grab my sandwich. Good mood is officially back. “You? Cranky? I don’t believe it.”
“You’re right. I’m too sweet to ever be cranky.”
That makes me laugh. I lean over and kiss her quickly. “You know, Kay-Kay, I think I like you.”
She lifts her hand, which is holding a floppy shoestring fry. “Okay. I can deal with all your little names for me, I even like some of them, but Kay-Kay won’t work.”
“Why? It’s like Lo-Lo.”
“Kay-Kay sounds like cray cray, Logan,” she points out with such a serious face and tone that I can’t help but laugh.
“Okay. That name has officially been deleted from my vocabulary. Hey, one of my friends from college is throwing a huge birthday party on Saturday. Do you want to go with me?” She immediately seems unsure. “I promise it’ll be fun and that at no point will I leave your side, but you don’t have to go if you don’t want.”
“That sounds like fun. Sure, I’ll go.”
I smile. “Good. We’ll get back late, so you could spend the night here if you want.”
“Already trying to get into my pants again, Puddin’ Tang?”
I laugh. “Who says I’m waiting until Saturday? You’re here now.”
She takes a sip of her sweet tea and shakes her head. “I should actually head home. It’s getting late and I still have so much schoolwork to do.” She starts to gather the trash from her meal to throw it away.
“Stay.” Kayla arches an eyebrow at me. “You can still do it here. I don’t want you to leave yet. It’s turned into a shitty day. You can’t leave me like this.” I pout my lips and make an attempt at puppy dog eyes, making her laugh.
“You’re pitiful, but fine. You win.” She leaves me to finish off the rest of my sandwich while she gets back to her studies.
I join her a minute or so later. She grabs a pillow, places it in my lap, and lies down to continue reading. My fingers seem to tangle in her hair almost immediately. I’ve never been a guy who does such a thing, or to otherwise care much about a girl’s hair, but I’m a bit fascinated with hers. I blame it on the length. There’s so much of it.
“How long have you had your hair like this?”
“What?” She cranes her head to look at me and I repeat my question. “Oh, since high school. It took forever to get it this long and I haven’t gotten sick of it yet, though I come close every summer because I get so hot.” She turns back to her textbook.
We sit like that until she turns to another assignment. It’s actually not a bad way to spend the night. I’m dozing off when Kayla finally finishes up. With my eyes barely opened, I watch her put her things back in her bag.
“Going home, sugar?”
“Not yet.”
My eyes drift closed; I’m apparently more tired than I thought. But they pop back open when I feel her hands on my shoulders and her straddling my lap.
“Sleepy, Logan?” Kayla asks with a teasing tone.
“Nope.” Not anymore I’m not. Especially when she kisses my neck.
“I seem to remember you mentioning a reward system, though you slacked off, leaving me so disappointed. You don’t want me to go home disappointed, do you, Logan?”
“No, baby. Not at all.” My hands slide down her back, cup her ass, and then pick her up to carry her to my room. No sense in starting something on the couch when she’ll likely want to be in my bedroom, like last time. Not to mention, I don’t have any condoms in here. We get on my bed, I take off her shirt and pants, and swoop up her body to kiss her again.
Once I kiss down her chest, hook my fingers into her panties and slide them off, Kayla tenses.
“What’s wrong?” I ask.
“What are you doing?” She pulls her knees together to hide herself.
Seems pretty obvious to me, but I say, “Going down on you. Should I not?” I’m confused by her sudden change. We didn’t actually fool around last time because once I brought her to my bed, things moved straight to sex. What could be her issue? Maybe she’s one of those girls who simply doesn’t like oral? I’ve heard of those girls, though I’ve never met one. Or maybe... “You’ve done this before, right?”
“Well...”
“What kind of jackasses have you been with, Kayla?” This is unbelievable.
“The kind who never wanted to do that obviously,” she snaps.
“Hey.” I pull her knees apart so I can crawl up her body and be face-to-face with her again. “I can’t believe what you’ve missed out on because of them is all. It’s good stuff, hot lips. And I would love to be the one to show you I’m right. It’s my second favorite thing to do next to sex.”
Her eyes widen. “Seriously?”
“Oh, yeah. I love getting a girl off like that.”
Kayla hesitates once more, but then she says, “I’m nervous about it.”
That is not a no. It’s practically a hesitant yes. “I’ll help you relax again, but at any time you change your mind and want to stop, say so. It’ll rock your world, I promise.”
With her nod and my promise on the line, I work on relaxing her and making her want more. There’s a weight on my shoulders. This is Kayla’s first time having someone go down on her and this is my first time being someone’s first. There’s no way I’m letting this girl down.