I let the hot water run over my body after a night out with Lizith. I didn't speak to her at all on the way back. Instead, my hands twitched as I itched to go back and put a fist through that fucker’s face. He practically drooled and touched her with his eyes, imagining the things he would do to her. 

He was Lizith’s age. Young, untainted by years of life behind him that would make him hard to love. He would touch her in a way I cannot—with youthful hands lacking the roughness of age. I’m so much older than Lizith, and she has decades left of beauty, and one day, she may not want me anymore. 

Before my little bird, I never questioned my looks and charm. Now, with a beautiful angel-like creature like Lizith, I fear time like a plague chasing after me. I can’t outrun it. Then, when she tempted him out of revenge, I was reminded that I am by far living a nightmare that gets closer with each passing day. 

My muscles bunch under the water and soap cascading down my skin. The room is spinning, and I feel sudden anxiety that I can’t slow down. 

“Xander?” Her voice revives me, bringing my head out from under the water. I keep my hands braced on the shower wall in front of me. 

“Yes, my love?” I try to seem controlled. My blood may be rushing with insecurities, but I don't dare voice it to her. 

“I was wondering if we could talk.” 

I take a deep breath and watch her body outlined on the other side of the fogged glass. “I’m in the shower, little bird. Wait on the bed for me and I will be out in a moment.” I deflect and show dominance. Control the situation, and I can keep some sanity. 

“Okay.” She leaves, and I spend a second or two reining back in my emotions and putting on my game face. I climb out and towel off, wrapping it tight around my waist, low on my hips. Stepping out, I am met with a surprise. 

“Lizith?” 

“Little bird. Call me by my name, my keeper.” She kneels in the middle of the bed, naked. On her knees, she perches with her hand extended out with a tumbler filled with scotch on the rocks. 

“What are you doing, little bird?” I question, stepping closer. I’m shocked by the turn of events. 

She has her head down, but when I whisper this question, she slowly brings her eyes up. “I forgive you, my keeper. I don’t ever want to go another day telling lies or spewing hate. I can’t do it, my love. I just can’t.” Her lip trembles and thousands of goose bumps break out over her skin as she starts to shiver and the ice clinks against the glass. 

Just like that, I move. Taking the drink from her hand, I place it on the desk and replace her hand with mine. 

“Stand up. You're my equal.” I pull her flush against me, her barely there bump touching my pelvis. 

“Look at me.” I grip her chin in my hand. “Do not apologize for what I did. I shouldn't have hidden this secret. This is my fault.” 

She nods, her beautiful eyes locked on mine. I can see deep into her soul. “I thought about it and realized how much your lie changed my life. If you didn't pick me that day, Xander, I wouldn't be with you, and our love wouldn't exist.” I watch her eye twitch—my stunning, neurotic woman. “Our miracle wouldn't exist. And we both did things wrong. I lied for years, planning to win you back and start a family I promised you. You were hurt, but you forgave me. I owe you.” 

“You do not owe me anything. I thrive off knowing you did everything to win me back, just the way I like it.” I tighten my grip on her chin. “Crazed and possessive. You would do anything I ask, and I wouldn't have it any other way.” 

Lizith trembles, knees buckling as I catch her before they go out completely. “I think your little wings just grew back.” 

“Because we are mending each other.” 

“No, it’s because we thrive on the damned and broken inside us. You can never do that again, Lizith. We can never turn on one another. We have no one but each other. This world is against us already, so we cannot be at odds.” 

She blushes, nodding and letting those tears fall without reservation. “Kiss me, Xander. Make this all better.” 

With apologies on our lips, I decide to change the mood. “Now that we are both on the same page, you do owe me.” 

She shakes her head, confused. “What do you mean?” She reaches between us and releases the towel from my hips, leaving us both naked, and my cock goes full-mast. 

“You flirted to upset me, and bad little birds get punished. You owe me a thousand apologies, starting now. On all fours, on the bed. Ass in the air and lips on my cock. I want you to choke on me until I flood your mouth with my seed, little bird.” 

Her nipples could cut me as they pebble against my abs. “Xander, I didn't want him. I wasn't flirting. I promise.” She drags her nails up my abs and I growl. 

“Your eyes sparkled when he reacted to your charm. You wanted to make me boil and it worked. I don’t take kindly to you fucking with me like that. You are mine.” I move my hands from her jaw to her neck, and I squeeze with just enough force that her breath catches. She is so fucking painstakingly beautiful it nearly squeezes the very life out of me. Her green eyes and pale skin are my undoing.

“Are you going to hurt me?” Her lashes bat up at me and those eyes penetrate me. Lizith looks afraid but excited, hopeful yet petrified. 

“Do you want me to? Just ask, little thing, and I will give you what you and I both want.” 

That snarky, smug smirk tugs at her lips, and I watch the fire dance across her hazy eyes. “Don’t let me come till you see fit. Fuck your sorries into me, and then when you think you have found my forgiveness, fuck me so hard I don’t remember anything but the feel of you.” 

I growl, my cock now leaking heavy beads of need all over her stomach. How could she be so beautiful and forgiving and selfless after everything that transpired over the weekend? I don’t mistake it as submission. I identify it for what it is—control over me. This porcelain beauty was made for me. Lizith Morrison has me by the neck, heart, and fucking balls. I would take a life for her if she asked. 

“On. The. Fucking. Bed. Don't think I won’t punish you even worse for letting foul words fall from your perfect mouth, little bird. Suck my dick; choke on it. Make me praise you. Got it?” 

She nods, her neck moving along the inside of my hands. 

When she turns, I can’t control myself. She’s one step away from me when I reach around and roughly grab her tit in my hand, the other hand grasping her ass and squeezing before I spank it. “Mine.” Fuck. “My fuck doll, my queen, my siren. You don’t understand what I will do for you. You have no damn idea.” I release Lizith, going to my knees on the end of the mattress, and she gets into the position I ordered.

She licks those full lips and opens to speak, but I shut her up with my cock. I shove it to the back of her throat and her eyes squeeze shut, water escaping the corners. She gags on me, and it’s like a symphony. 

“Fuck. Do it, beautiful.” I lean and slap her ass again, and she starts bobbing her head the best she can from her position. Grabbing all her hair and knotting it in my fist, I move her back and forth, watching the violence of my princess sucking my cock. 

Lizith is everything to me. My plaything, my heart, my goddamn lifeline. My most precious possession. I’m a thousand lifetimes of unworthiness for her. I do not deserve this classic beauty. 

Her green eyes have darkened and she looks up at me under thick lashes. I bite my lip, my entire body flexed and tight. The veins in my arms are thick as I steer her head. The veins that line my hips between my V are pronounced, alive, and pumping with alpha blood. 

“You are so damn beautiful. I love you like hell loves tortured souls,” I grit through my teeth, throwing my head back when she moans. It vibrates against my shaft as it’s deep in her throat. That’s when it hits me. What the fuck am I doing? My lady deserves the spoiling; she deserves her one thousand apologies in the way of intimate pleasure. 

My nostrils flare, and every ounce of restraint I have is tested as I leave her mouth. She peers up, confused, somehow wiping away the spit around her lips with grace. 

“Keeper? I wasn't done. Was I not doing it the way you wanted?” Lizith sits back, her ass meeting her heels. Embarrassment floods her body and her cheeks and neck go red. 

“No, you were doing it perfectly. Too good for what I deserve. You deserve the pleasure. On your back, pretty thing.” I turn on the cool and collected part of me. 

“But—” 

I hush her and gently touch her cheek. “No, on your back. I want to feast. I want to spoil. I want to ravage you.” I hear and see her gulp. 

“Xander,” she practically pleas, asking for something we both don't know or understand. There is a deep ache and a palpable need to mate and be so damn connected that we could crawl inside one another, become the same soul, the same body, the same heartbeat. 

“I know, little bird. I’m trying to scratch that itch. Let me inside you, and I promise I can mend everything I broke.” 

“Promise?” 

“What did I say?” 

She smiles, and this one reaches her eyes. And with that, she relinquishes her trust and lets me take everything from her. I lay her back slowly, her body surrendering to the silk sheets. I spread her legs and kneel between them. Her pointed knees graze against my ribcage as she smiles innocently up at me, the tip of her finger between her teeth.

I tilt my head, and my lip catches between my teeth, mimicking her action. I take in her body, looking down the slim column of her neck to the sleek, smooth skin over her collarbone. Her pink nipples are hard and rosy, beckoning me. I lean a little and grab a hold of her breast, pinching the nipple between my long, thick fingers. My other hand finds my cock somewhere in my venture, and I squeeze tight, trying to imitate the tightness of her smooth slit, but it’s not enough.

If it isn't her, it’s not enough. 

“Suck these fingers, baby.” My hand leaves her nipple, my other still going strong on my cock. Placing three stiff fingers to her lips, Lizith sucks them in and wets them. My jaw unhinges as she moans around them, her eyes eating up my working hand on my shaft. 

“Deadly.” 

She giggles. “Then fuck me like it, my keeper.” 

With that, I take my three wet fingers and slam them into her. She screams, her back leaving the bed and her arms seizing as her hands grip the sheets. “Xander!” I start out rough, showing her how fucking much she needs a man like me. Not a man her own age. Lizith would never be worshipped or pleased in the way only I can. It isn't possible. 

“Yeah, you're ready. Give me your orgasm, and then I will give you real pain. Real euphoria.” I curl my finger upward and hit her spot. She detonates around my fingers, her eyes never closing, staying focused on mine. For a split second, I swear her soul leaves her body and slams into me.

Before she even has a moment to collect her existence again, I replace my fingers with my cock and she is back at it, screaming, clawing, and reaching for me. I drag her hips up and balance her weight on her shoulders as I pound into her, ready for my release. She has me wound so tight I plan to go over and over again. This is just the beginning of a never-ending night where I will be inside her. Apologizing and stealing back what she took from me. 

“Don’t stop. Please, Xander, never stop loving me like this.” Reaching up, she grabs her hair in her hands and cries out into the night. 

And with a slap to her hip, I make a vow to her. “I will never stop. Ever.” 

For the next four days, we apologize to each other. Nonstop. Through fucking, through lovemaking, through late-night talks about her beginnings and mine. I truly learn who my little bird is. And for the blizzards that kept us locked up tight, I am forever in their debt.