Chapter 10
"This is amazing!" Sasha exclaimed as she climbed out of the vehicle and looked at the lights shining everywhere. "You guys really know how to do Christmas." She stood there with her coat wrapped around her body as she ignored the cold biting into the material. She felt a little lightheaded from not eating for the entire day, but she was certainly not going to let it affect the time she was spending with Stephan and his mother. It was Christmas Eve night and he had come to pick her up personally from her apartment. He had called and told her to pack enough clothes for several days and she had done so.
"As soon as Mother knew you were coming, she had people over to decorate and out up the lights." He took her arm and guided her out of the cold. It was late afternoon, but the dark had already descended. He had a function later tonight and wished he could cry off, but he had to be there. The new line of makeup and lipstick had come out to rave reviews and this was the coming out party. He wished she would come with him.
"Please take Ms. Fullerton’s bag to my suite," he told the maid as soon as they entered the foyer. He took her hand and led her into the vast living room where she stopped and stared at the towering Christmas tree with the star atop it. A fire was blazing in the hearth and his mother was seated near the mantel with a smile on her face. She was wearing a bright red robe and looked very alive and well.
"My dear, welcome." She stretched out both hands in welcome. Sasha hurried over and gave her a hug.
"For a person who is supposed to be dying, you look amazing," she said without thinking.
"Sasha." Stephan’s tone was resigned as he spoke.
"Your mother knows me quite well and so do you," she said as she turned to look at him with a smile on her lips. "I talk first and then think after." She turned to look at Elizabeth. "It’s good to see you out of your room."
"It’s good to be out." She gestured for the girl to sit next to her. "As soon as I heard that you were coming. I wanted everything to be okay for you."
"It is more than okay. I really do feel welcome. And while Stephan goes to his little party, we gals are going to stay up late and chat and forget about him."
He looked at her wryly. "You could always come with me."
She looked up at him and for a moment was tempted. "You know why I cannot and besides I like spending time with your mother. I will be fine."
"You will be." Elizabeth squeezed her hands lightly. "But first, we are going to eat something."
Stephan saw the hesitant look on her face and waited for her response. "Okay."
*****
Stephan wandered around the room restlessly and felt the strain of the forced smiles on the muscles of his face. He kept glancing at his watch discreetly and wandered how soon he could leave. Sasha had come up to watch him get ready for the party and had told him how sexy he looked. "So how many of your past flames will be there?" she had asked him casually as he knotted the tie around his neck. She had been lounging on the bed wearing nothing but a flimsy dark blue robe and he could see the outline of her body through the material. They had not long finished making love and he could feel himself hardening again.
"Jealous?" he had teased her.
"Why should I be?" She had shrugged. "I was just curious. We don’t own each other, Stephan."
"And yet you are the woman who is in my bed."
"Just a technicality and one that you don’t have to worry about. I mean, you can always take her back to the apartment with you before coming back here," she had told him.
He had turned to look at her. "You want me to take someone back to the apartment while I have you here? Why?"
She had shrugged. "I don’t own you," she repeated.
"I am coming back here to be with you, Sasha. You have no need to be insecure."
"I have never been insecure in my life," she had told him stoutly.
He had walked over to the bed and sat on the edge of it to look at her. "I am with you," he had told her softly. "Get that into your head."
For how long?" she had asked him.
"Are we going to be doing this now?" he had asked her.
"No," she had responded as she touched his face gently. "You really look hot."
"Thank you."
"Please, get out of here before I beg you to stay."
"Beg me to stay," he had whispered as he bent his head to hers.
"No," she had moaned as he took her lips with hers. He had ended up taking her from behind and being late. Now he was wishing he was with her.
He was jolted back to the present as someone touched his arm. He turned around to see Claudia standing there. She was wearing a sapphire blue outfit that looked stunning on her and her long black hair was loose around her face. She really was a lovely woman, he thought objectively.
"Hi," she said softly.
"Claudia, I had no idea you would be here."
"I get an automatic invitation to all the press parties your company puts on, remember?" She looked around. "You are alone?"
He stiffened at that. "Yes."
"Good," she said softly. "I found myself wondering how I was going to bear to see the woman you are with when I am not over you."
"Claudia-"
"It’s fine, Stephan. I will be okay. Do you mind me hanging with you for a little bit?"
He hesitated a bit and then nodded.
"Thank you." She placed her hand inside his arm and walked with him as he made his way across the room. The hotel ballroom was the scene of the dazzling display of women in their finest as they walked around the room. Giant displays of the newest lines from the Skin Deep collection were everywhere and the glossy displays of the plus sized women who were involved in the commercial were mounted against the walls. A particular one caught the interest of most of the women as well as the men there. It showed a size twenty African American woman wearing torn jeans, knee length boots, and black open front long sleeved blouse as she pursed her lips wearing Coral Deep. It was very eye-catching and had people constantly staring at the photo.
"Very unusual," Claudia commented as she stared at the photo. "She is beautiful. Society leads us to believe that only women of a certain weight hold the keys being beautiful, but they are wrong."
"I agree," Stephan said softly as he stared at the photo. It reminded him of Sasha. She had worn something similar when she came with him tonight and he had not been able to stop looking at her. He removed Claudia’s hand from his arm. "Would you please excuse me?"
"Of course."
He hurried off to find a private place and made the call. "Are you bored?" The sound of her voice caused him to smile.
"Sort of. What are you doing?"
"You seriously called to find that out?"
"Yes, so please humor me."
"I am sprawled out on your big ass bed and watching your impossibly large television. How is it?"
"People are talking about the campaign. I think that you are going to be flooded with jobs from now on."
"I am sure Benjamin will be over the moon," she said lightly.
"And you?"
"And me," she responded. "So what are you doing?"
"I am talking to you."
"I mean aside from talking to me. Who are you hanging out with?"
"I thought you were not jealous."
"I am not. I am just curious."
"It’s okay to be jealous, Sasha."
"Only I am not," she insisted. "Who is she?"
"Just a friend."
"A friend you slept with in the past."
"We don’t need to go over that."
"So the answer is yes. As I said before, we are not in a relationship so it’s none of my concern."
"You are wrong," he said quietly.
"About what?"
"About us not being in a relationship. I am here now and this is my press party and I would rather be spending time with you."
He waited until she was ready to speak. "What are you saying?"
"You already know what I am saying, Sasha. We mean more to each other than just the meeting of our bodies."
"We don’t know each other."
"Then let us get to know each other. I am not coming to one of these functions without you again and I am coming home."
"You just got there!" Sasha exclaimed.
"So? I am coming home to you."
******
"I cannot believe that you ditched your own press party to come home." She had been absurdly pleased when she had seen him come into the room. After he had hung up from her, she had waited on him to come home not quite believing that he would. But he had bounded into the room and after taking off his clothes he had come onto the bed and had made love to her.
"I told you I would." He was propped against the pillows with her head on his chest.
"And the friend?"
He looked down at her. "I already told her that I had met someone else."
"How did she take it?"
"Can we stop talking about her?" he asked her in exasperation.
"For now," she warned him. "So let’s talk."
"Okay." He bent and kissed her forehead. "My dad was a pharmacist."
"I already knew that. There is a wealth of information about you on the internet, Stephan. I just Googled Stephan Coleman and you should see the amount of information that comes up."
"He was the best damned pharmacist there was. I bet that information was not there."
"No," she told him. "Or the fact that he must have been a very good father."
"And husband. After he died, my mother was never the same. She took care of me the best way she could and made sure that I knew she was around and was my greatest supporter, but she was sad and I wanted to erase that sadness from her face. I never quite achieved that."
"And now you stand to lose her as well," she said softly. He stiffened at that and then he nodded.
"Yes. But I don’t want to talk about that. I am not ready to talk about losing the only family I have."
"I get it. When Mama died, I could not function. God! That woman knew the all the right words to say about every subject. She was never one for self-pity and always said that things could have been worse. I never knew my dad and she never talked about him only saying that he gave her one of the best gifts in the world and she was grateful for that. I used to hate when she would wake me up bright and early on Sundays to go to services with her." She laughed suddenly and he stared down at her in wonder. "I remember one Sunday I feigned sickness, I told her that I was having the cramps and I could not walk. She just came into the room and looked me straight in the face and told me that it was a good thing we were driving and that I should get out of bed and go get ready because we were going." She sighed. "She was quite a woman and when she died I wanted to die as well, but she told me that she had already lived her life and it was my time now."
"She sounds like an amazing woman. Do you think she would have liked me?" he asked her softly.
She lifted her head to look at him. "Maybe not at first. She would probably think that you are too rich to be humble, but after she got to know you she would have liked you."
"Thank you."
She nodded. "Why didn’t you become a pharmacist like your dad?"
"He wanted me to become a doctor," Stephan told her with a grin.
"Hmm." She studied his handsome face. "Maybe it was good that you weren’t."
"Why not?"
"They would not get anything done at that hospital. You are too pretty for your own good," she said offhandedly. She trailed a finger down his muscled chest and smiled at the quivering of his flesh. "What are we doing, Stephan?" she asked as she looked back at him.
"We are getting to know each other."
"And then what?"
"And then we get to know each other more and start going out on dates," he told her softly as he captured her hand.
"You know why I cannot do that."
"Actually, I don’t."
"My life will be turned upside down. I would not be able to work where I am now and my life will no longer be my own."
"You could quit."
She stared at him with a frown. "And do what? Become your full-time woman?"
"That’s actually not a bad plan."
"I think too much of myself to even answer that one."
"You could come and work for me."
She stared at him. "So now I would become the woman who gets the job because she is screwing the boss. Nice."
He laced his fingers through hers. "No one would dare say that."
"Not to our face, but behind our backs they would have a field day."
"What do you want us to do?"
She shrugged. "I want to keep the arrangement this way for the time being until I figure things out."
"Someone is going to find out eventually."
She shrugged again. "When that happens we will deal with it. I like my life the way it is right now, Stephan. You are used to the limelight and I am not."
"How do I behave when I come to your ad agency?"
"Why would you be coming there?"
"I have decided that your agency should be the one handling our accounts from now on."
"Because I am sleeping with you?"
He sighed at that. "Because you are damned good." He tilted her chin up. "I thought you were filled with confidence?"
"I was – I am. You are right. I am pretty damned good."
"I know," he said softy. "Can we stop talking now?"
"Why?"
"Because I want to do this." He bent his head and took her lips with his in a kiss that ceased all conversation.
*****
He watched her throughout the day. They had gotten up late and he had given her a diamond bracelet for her Christmas. "I did not get you anything because what do you give a freaking billionaire?" she had told him as she stared at the bracelet on her wrist.
"What indeed?" he had said in amusement. They had showered together before going downstairs where Elizabeth had been waiting in the cheerfully elegant living room. He had gone over to kiss his mother and handed her a gaily wrapped package and told her to open it. It had been a selection of poems that she had wanted and she had thanked him effusively. She had also given Sasha a gift. A lovely cashmere coat that she could not stop staring at!
"Okay, guys, you really do not play fair!" she had told them as she stared at the moss green coat and touched the softness of the material. "I did not get you anything."
"That’s okay, my dear. You being here is present enough," Elizabeth told her.
"I should feel bad, but I will take that," she had said with a grin.
He noticed that she barely touched the rich and delicious breakfast that had been laid out in the dining room, just picking at some fruits here and there and a small cup of coffee. He walked over to where she was sitting and told her. "Let me fix you a plate."
"I am fine."
"I insist." His gray eyes met hers and she knew what he was doing.
"Stop trying to run my life."
"By fixing you a plate?" he asked her mildly as he walked away. He heaped a plate with delicate croissants, crispy bacons, scrambled eggs, and a glass of freshly squeezed orange juice and brought it over. She gave him a dirty look and for a moment refused to take the plate from him. "I have no problem in feeding you," he told her.
She grabbed the plate from him and started stuffing her mouth. "There! Are you satisfied?"
"Not until everything is finished," he told her mildly and did not leave her side until she was finished.
Sasha felt her stomach protesting. She had spent weeks not wanting anything much to try and get the weight off that the food she had just eaten was taking effect. She felt the nausea and knew she had to head to a bathroom very soon! She waited until he was preoccupied with talking to his mother before she made her way out of the room and straight upstairs to the bathroom in his suite. She shoved her fingers down her throat and gagged. She had to do it several times before the food came back up and into the bowl. She closed her eyes as the last of it came up and felt the weakness invading her body. It was when she stumbled to her feet and went to the sink that she saw him standing there with his arms folded onto his chest.
"Stephan, you startled me." She rinsed her mouth out and turned to him. "I guess it was the bacon or maybe the croissant."
He did not move or say anything but stood there watching her.
"We should go back down." She made to move past him but he blocked her way. "What is it?"
"How long?" he asked her softly.
"How long what?"
"How long have you been inducing vomit?"
"I don’t know what you mean." She made to move past him again but he stood his ground. "Please, let me pass."
"Not until you tell me what is going on. You don’t eat anything and I take it that when you do, you bring it back up deliberately. Am I right so far?"
She stepped back and stared at him defiantly. "So?"
"Jesus, Sasha, why in God’s name would you do something like that?"
"It’s easy for you to say that!" she cried as she stared at him. "You are gorgeous! You don’t have an extra ounce of fat on your body. You can eat anything and get away with it. I even look at a chocolate cake and I put on weight. I have been trying to lose weight since I was a child and nothing works for me, so my last resort is to stay away from food."
He grabbed her arm, his gray eyes flashing as he looked at her. "Do you have any idea what that does to your body? You need food in order to survive, dammit! You need food inside you in order for you to be able to function. What’s the matter with you? You are beautiful and smart and incredibly sexy! Why would you want to change anything?"
"Because I cannot be seen with a man like you. I stand next to you and we go somewhere and it will be a joke! I will be the fat woman with the handsome Stephan Coleman. Don’t you get it? I am not thin. I wear size twenty and I have been trying to lose the weight and it is not happening no matter what I do. I can’t-" She broke off as the tears sprouted.
He took her in his arms and resisted when she tried to turn away from him. "Hey." He closed his arms around her body. She buried her face into his chest and cried. He ran his hands over her back and waited her out. When she had finished he led her into the bedroom and they sat on the sofa.
"We should go back downstairs," she muttered.
"Not yet." He took her hands in his. "There is someone I would like you to talk to."
"A shrink?" She looked at him with a frown.
"That’s not such a bad idea," he said with a slight smile. "But the wife of a friend of mine."