NINE
Time ceases to exist.
A total standstill within my mind.
Nothing makes sense; head feels heavy and my throat is tight. Almost numb.
And yet, I sense him all around me. The gentle way he gingerly eases me down to sit on the bed. How he rubs his hands up and down my arms—shakes me a little in the hope that I’ll react.
I want to, almost do, but then he’s gone.
Without his presence the images hit me all at once. The broken doll. His reaction and mine. He was horrified for her, but it’s his pain that spears through my soul. Breaks a small part off. And it’s that feeling that births my guilt.
I’m here with him and she’s not. Can never be again.
And for a brief moment there, as she was being killed, there was a part of me that was . . . No. God, no. I can’t allow myself to think about it.
I stare off into space and my vision starts to tunnel out again. Chest tries to cave in on itself as my breathing becomes rapid. Almost choking me.
Everything is heightened: fear, anger . . . my attraction to him. A heady concoction that weighs me down. Makes me feel like the lowest form of garbage.
How can I still be aroused after what I just witnessed?
Noah returns and I feel him slipping something around my lower chest, clipping it. Whatever it is, he twists it, then lifts my arms to slip them through something. With care he sets me in place.
Straps. That thought is followed by another disconnected one. My bra.
His touch scorches my veins. Feeling returns to my numb fingers; it’s painful but I welcome it.
However, just as soon as it comes it’s gone.
He expertly puts it on me, covering my breasts. I should thank him, is my next muddled thought, but I don’t.
Not a sound leaves my throat. It’s closed up tight.
What would be the point anyway? Although I appreciate his gesture, I’m still naked from the waist down.
“I’m here, baby,” Noah croons, his voice like a balm soothing my fragile nerves.
Please. Make me feel something other than this.
He gently maneuvers me until I’m lying on the bed.
“Shhhh.” The covers are pulled from under me and draped over my body. For a second there is a reprieve. His scent warms me and I take in a big intake. Hold him in my lungs. My fingers twitch, and the urge to grasp his hand almost succeeds.
Silently, he walks away.
No. Come back. I need you.
I hear the thoughts loud and clear but can’t voice them. The lights around us dims once more, I think. Then again, I’m barely registering what my eyes are seeing. No way to be sure. Blurry images are merged with horrific memories.
That degenerate lullaby starts playing again.
The bed dips behind me, the covers lifting. Strong hands grab me and turn me around. A whimper escapes my throat; it’s the only thing I can muster.
Thank God he understands. Maybe he needs me just as much.
Noah lays me over him, my ear to his chest. His hand slides beneath my hair, caressing me, and slowly warmth starts to slip back in. It settles deep and my heart pounds.
Consciousness is just within my grasp. Right fucking there, and I’m ready to admit it’s because of him. He’s my center in this horror-filled game.
Noah is my sanity.
“Ivy. I’m bloody scared. I won’t survive something happening to you,” he mumbles against my cheek. He moves his hand, thumb pressing into my jaw to tilt my head back.
Heat against my mouth. Wet, plump flesh.
Air expands my lungs. Stability, that evadeful bitch, begins her descent into my consciousness and his worry-filled eyes meet mine.
Frantic.
Scared.
Warmth. Behind it all there is a warmth behind his gaze. He needs me.
This one thought causes a rush of electrical pulses to flood my system and the entire world reappears before my eyes.
“Ivy?” We’re so close that his lips brush against mine as he speaks. Chaste. Sweet. Feels as if we’ve done this a million and one times.
Fisting his hair in my hand, I stare deep into his eyes. “Noah . . . I-I need you.” I punctuate each word with a slow roll of my hips. Minute. Just enough to move his boxers down a tiny bit. They scrunch at the waist.
There’s a low rumbling building at the back of his throat. Animalistic, it urges me to continue. I want to hear it.
Louder.
Out of control.
“Ivy, baby . . .” Oh god, he whimpers this. His final plea for me to behave before it’s too late.
And I clench. He feels it, the way he tenses lets me know. Another swivel of my hips and the beautiful head of his cock slips over the waistband of his boxers.
His skin is on mine, touching me. Grazing my slick flesh.
I move over him. A tiny bit. Just enough that my lips pet his swollen girth.
Noah feels right. Too good for me to stop now.
Fuck propriety.
Fuck her perverse rules.
If I’m to be with him, it’s on my terms.
“Only you can make this right,” I breathe out, a low keening sound which is suddenly drowned out by his growl.
Noah snaps.
An animal unleashed.
On my next breath, I’m beneath him. Surrounded by him. A warm and thrilling cocoon. He holds himself up just slightly, most of his weight on his arms—one on each side of my head while he watches me.
Eyes piercing, looking for just a tiny hint of regret.
He will find none.
“You do this to me, love.” His hips move, a slow roll into my wet lips which brings me back to the present. The fabric of his boxers are rough against my sensitive skin.
“Take them off,” I beg on a low moan, my feet helping him push them down. Low enough that they sit just below his ass.
Noah’s entire body is wound tight. Clenching.
With both hands I grip his hips, urging him to take what I so willingly give, but again, he doesn’t. I can see the fight in his eyes, he’s giving me an out.
“Don’t rush this, Ivy.” Instead, he reaches for my hands and uses them together to roll the material of his underwear toward his knees before kicking them off. “Under my control . . . I say when.”
Oh God. He’s there. Right there against me and bare. A small swivel of my hips and he’ll be inside.
Stretching me.
Marking me.
“Please.” It’s a desperate whimper while I arch up, desperate to feel more of him.
Planting my feet on the mattress, I tilt my pelvis up. His cock, that piercing I’ve been curious about since we got here, rubs my clit. One pass and pleasure shoots up my spine. My entire being is one pulsating nerve-ending.
His cock slides through my slickness again and I close my eyes. It’s too much. I’ve never felt this before, and he has yet to slip inside.
“Look at me,” Noah growls out, stopping all movement until I do. His heaviness flexes and I whimper. “Open those eyes, baby. Need them on me.”
Mine snap open at his command. Focus on him. No words are exchanged between us. They aren’t needed.
His need is visceral. Demanding. Palpitating through each touch.
Long fingers rake down the back of my thighs and pull my legs high around his hips. Held tight. Not an inch of space is found between his body and mine.
“Son of a bitch.” Noah shivers above me, the movement strong enough to push us further up the bed. Another flex of his hips and the pupil of his eyes enlarge again; gone is that beautiful blue and in its place is left an almost hungry black.
If I didn’t know the man above me so well, I would’ve been scared.
His facial features contort into a look of almost pain. As if I’m giving him life and then taking away his next breath right after.
“Make me come,” I cry out on his next pass, the thickness of his head adding pressure on my sensitive bundle of nerves.
My choice of words is not lost on either of us.
I’m asking him to do what she ordered him to do, but this time, under our rules. Not hers. This moment is ours.
Bringing my legs up, he exposes me to his eyes. All of me.
He pauses, holding his thick cock just outside my entrance. “You seriously have no fucking idea how long I’ve waited . . .” Noah trails off, almost trembling. A minute flex of his hips and I can feel him pushing in. Just the tip.
But, Jesus.
I’m stretching to accommodate that first tiny inch, my pussy clenching to pull him in further, before he pulls out. All the way and then smacks my clit with his velvety tip.
Once. Twice.
“Oh my God!” The shock of pleasure rolls through me, almost causing me to choke. All I do is feel as he slips just the head once more and repeats the torture.
I’m a mess. So wet, I can hear my myself each time he pushes in. Can feel it as it drips down my pussy and onto the crease of my ass.
He presses harder. Uses his grip on my hip to slide through my parted lips and bump my clit. It’s no longer slow. No longer with gentle care.
His touch screams desperation. That piercing at the tip is his instrument of punishment.
Almost as if he’s angry at me for causing his loss of control while I relish in it.
“Let me feel you just like this, Ivy. Just like this beneath my touch.”
“Need more.”
“More baby?” he growls, a bead of sweat sliding down the side of his face.
“Yes. God yes. More!” Maybe I’m a greedy bitch. Maybe this will blow up in our faces.
Ask me if I care?
Placing a leg over each shoulder, Noah pressed our bodies closer. “Are you close?” His long fingers leave my hips and travel up my stomach. Through the center of my chest and settle at the base of my neck.
A flex of his hand and they hold me firm.
He’s trapping me. Commanding me.
The bold move makes my pussy clench. “Almost there.” It’s a wanton moan. A sound I’ve never made before this craziness began.
“Ivy . . . love, I need you to come with me.” His gentle tone is a complete contradiction to his movements.
All at once, I’m overwhelmed all over again. He covers me from head to toe. His fingers tighten around my neck and his length grinds harder.
“Noah.”
“Just like that, baby.” Arching up, I press my lips to his. A chaste touch, but it’s enough to cause an eruption.
Every single molecule in my DNA contracts—a harsh jerk that causes me to lose touch with my surroundings. I come for him and the sensations are almost volatile.
“Look at me, damn it. Look at what you do to me,” Noah hisses out and my eyes snap to his. Unfocused. All I see is that savage man over me, cock in hand.
When did he release my legs?
That thought halts as a hot string of cum lands on my feverish skin. Right at the top of my mound and dribbles down over my pussy. From top to the very edge of my slit.
His voice breaks on a violent roar, and he’s like a mutated version of himself above me—neck corded, veins bulging, teeth bared as he fucks his fist and milks his cock.
And then another two streams follow.
I’m covered in him.
“Oh God.” He shudders, barely breathing. “Oh fucking God.”
My breathing is harsh, but it ceases in my chest when that familiar crackle comes over the speakers.
Noah’s eyes widen and his facial features harden.
Immediately, we are met by an applause. What sounds like a standing ovation from a group, not just our captor.
Laughter follows—male and female from what I can tell.
They were watching us. A daunting idea hits and my insides churn.
Nausea claims me.
The euphoric rush of my release vanishes into thin air and my blood runs ice cold.
We were set up.
She pushed us to this point.
She wanted us to fail.
“Strike one. Now it’s time for the real punishment to begin.”
The end . . . for now.