“It’s gonna be incredible, V. I have my own little cubicle at the tutor center, and I bought this letter board so I can post inspirational sayings or quotes so everyone that comes in can get a little bit of positivity added in their day.”

She chuckles but throws her arm around me. “I’m proud of you. Tossing inspiration around like confetti while your boyfriend is being an ass.”

“He isn’t my boyfriend,” I grumble. “We were a casual thing, and now it’s over I guess.”

“Mm-hmm. Spin it however you want, but I saw the way he looked at you the other night.”

“Well, regardless, it’s been a week, and I haven’t heard a peep from him.”

Vanessa gives me a reassuring smile.

“It’s fine.” I shake off the sting of rejection. “On a happier note, Gabby is coming up next week to meet with an advisor and scope out the campus. Fingers crossed it goes well and that senior year the three of us can get an apartment off campus together.”

“Now you’re talking.”

Her phone beeps, and she gets that look on her face that tells me it’s Mario, which is confirmed when she says, “Mario says the guys are having a party tonight. What do you say we go celebrate surviving the first day of a new semester and your awesome new job?”

“I dunno.”

“Come on. The basketball guys are at an away game, so you don’t have to worry about running into them, and I’ll tell Mario I’m spending the party hours with my best girl. I promise I will not leave your side.” She sticks out her bottom lip, pouting and looking ridiculous.

“All right, all right. It’s better than sitting around here feeling sorry for myself.”

There are more people than I’ve ever seen crowded into the small space. Looks like everyone is looking for a way to celebrate the beginning of a new semester. “This is insane.”

“I know, right?” Vanessa says as she pushes through the living room. “Mario is probably downstairs. Let’s get a drink and say hello.”

With plastic cups filled with vodka and Sprite, we move toward the music pumping downstairs. Unlike the last time I was here, the basement is so packed that I can’t even tell it’s a dilapidated shithole.

We skirt the edges of the dance floor, holding hands so we don’t lose each other. “I see Clark and some of the other guys on the other side, maybe Mario is with them.”

I sip my drink and sway to the music, following V. It feels good to be out and not to be obsessing over if or when Wes might call.

A row of couches are pushed back against the far wall and people are smushed on them, girls on laps of guys I recognize. Clark is holding on tight to a busty redhead, and another guy I recognize as one of Mario’s roommates is leaning back, letting a petite blonde rape his face. She’s using so much tongue that I cringe and look away.

But what I see next stops me in my tracks. His lap is currently playing host to a beautiful brunette who has her hand affectionately resting on his chest. He’s drunk, that much would have been clear even if he didn’t have a tequila bottle in his hand.

“What the fuck, Wes?” It’s Vanessa’s voice, not my own, that gets his attention.

When his eyes find mine, they’re filled with regret and pain. He sits forward like he’s going to get up, but I’m not interested in talking to him. Not now. Maybe not ever again.

I turn and flee the way I came, pushing through the crowd as best as I can with my eyes blurred with unshed tears.

I make it all the way to the porch before Wes catches up to me. He puts his big body in front of me. “Wait, damn it, woman. Hold up.”

His breathing is labored, and he grabs ahold of the railing like he needs the support.

“What are you doing here?”

“Hanging with Mario and the guys. Nothing happened with that chick. She just sat down. I didn’t do anything.”

Nothing happened? God, if that isn’t the guilty man’s anthem, then I don’t know what is. Laughter bubbles in my chest. “I meant why aren’t you in California with the team?”

He shrugs. “Didn’t feel like it.”

He reaches out and caresses my cheek, brushing away a tear before he leans in bringing a waft of alcohol with him. I step back.

“You’re free to do whatever or whomever you want. You’ve made it very clear that whatever we were, we aren’t anymore. Just leave me alone.”

He looks conflicted about my words, but I mean it. I don’t want to talk to him when he’s like this. I knew standing by while he dealt with his shit would be hard, but this is too much. “Please. I’m begging you. Not here. Not tonight.”

He nods and tucks his hands into his front pockets before turning back to the house. I sag against the railing when he’s gone and let all the tears fall. I don’t even know why I’m crying. Despite the cliché, I believe that nothing happened between him and the chick downstairs. Not yet anyway. And I guess that’s what wrecks me —he is going to move on, and man, does it sting to picture him with other girls.

“Aww, don’t tell me the happy couple broke up?” David’s voice is like adding insult to injury. He walks out on to the porch with a beer in hand.

“I don’t have anything to say to you, David. What are you even doing here?”

He shrugs. “Looks like the whole university is here tonight.”

“Go away.” I bite back the horrible words I want to say. “Please.”

David smiles cruelly. “Reynolds cut you loose, huh? Maybe we should work out another agreement.” He leans in. “You didn’t really think I deleted all the pictures just because you got your boyfriend to threaten me, did you?’ He laughs. “Knew that wouldn’t last.”

My control, and probably my sanity, snaps. Killing him with kindness seems to be a losing battle. “You know what, David? Go to hell. You’re a shitty excuse for a human.” I shove past him and walk all the way home, hugging myself as I ugly cry. As I crawl into bed, I promise myself that, after tonight, I won’t shed one more tear over Wes Reynolds. I will cry out all the sadness to make room for hope, but the only thing I’m hoping for is to turn back to a time where Wes and I were happy.