[Jake]

The park is close enough to our apartment for us to walk to the movie. The sky is heavy with clouds and will more than likely dump on us at least one point throughout the night, but when you live in Washington State, you expect as much. We rarely have days in a row where it doesn’t rain, let alone weeks. Forget months. It’s the price we pay for going to college on an island in the Pacific Northwest.

Kayla has the blanket wrapped in her arms and stares straight ahead. It’s like she’s in a trance. She hasn’t talked much since we met up at home after her classes to leave for the park. Even as we ate a kickass pizza I made from scratch, she kept her eyes shadowed by her hair, her expression guarded.

My first thought is I did something wrong. Again. So, I ask, “Rough day?”

“No.”

“Everything good?”

“Yep.”

She’s not helping with her single word, single syllable, answers. I blow out a breath and work on my next strategy as we walk in silence. The closer we get, the stronger the smells of the food trucks get. Since it’s already getting dark, most of the vendors under canopies have closed up shop. Even some of the food trucks are closed.

As we approach the park, I spy a giant inflatable screen at the far end of the grass and an impressive number of moviegoers on a sea of blankets spread in front of it. Music floats through the crisp spring air. Once I find a premium spot under a tree—all the best spots are under shelter—I take the blanket and spread it out before setting the backrest pillow I carried right in the middle.

“What are you doing?”

I take a seat and lean on the pillow. “I’m getting comfortable.”

“Where am I supposed to sit?”

“Right here.” I tap the spot in front of me. “You can lean on me.” I meet her cautious gaze, hoping she picks up on what I’m really trying to say. “For everything.”

She folds her arms and tilts her head as she juts out a hip. “What makes you think I don’t want to have you lean on me?”

“Can’t we do both?” I sit up and rest my elbows on my knees. She tilts her head to the other side and studies me. I don’t look away. There’s no way she hasn’t picked up what I mean. She’s too damn smart. To make sure there’s no room for doubt, I jump to my feet and approach, cupping her cheeks in my hands. “You’re shaking.”

“I’m scared,” she whispers against my lips.

“Of what? Of me?”

“Of being with you. Of what it’s doing to me.”

“I know what being with you is doing to me,” I counter gently. “You make me a better man. For you. Because of you. I’m falling for you, Kayla. I’m falling hard.”

“Jake—”

I slant my lips over hers, cutting off her protest. It’s the only thing I know to do to snap her out of her uncertainty. It starts as a kiss to ease her angst, but when she licks my mouth open, it grows into a heated competition for control. I devour her lips. In turn, she devours my soul. I’m powerless to stop it, nor do I want it to stop. She’s already consumed so much of me. Why not let her have it all?

“Looks like we’re in for two shows.” Emma’s comment breaks the connection.

Stepping back, I lick Kayla from my lips as I bounce my gaze between Ryan and his girlfriend. What the hell? Is he stalking me now? I already work with the guy. Our girlfriends are both waitresses at the diner. We don’t need to sit next to each other at the movie.

“Hey,” Ryan greets.

“’Sup.” I nod in response.

“Not this again.” Emma thrusts the blanket into Ryan’s hands. “You two are terrible conversationalists. Where’s the wine? Never mind, I found it. Kayla, where’s yours? I’ll open it.”

“I’m not really feeling—”

“Wine, woman.” Emma gives her a look. Without another word, Kayla hands her the bottle we brought. I’ll have to learn that look.

By the time Ryan has their blanket next to ours, a single reading pillow similar to ours in the middle of their setup, Emma has four glasses full of ample pours. Kayla takes two and delivers one to me. I hold it up and wait for her to do the same. Once she does, I tap them together and steal a kiss. “Are you ready to relax?”

“I don’t know if I’ll ever be ready.”

Her comment bothers me. I have to find some why for her to let her hair down. “Tell you what. Just for tonight, let’s pretend there’s nothing past midnight. Tomorrow, we no longer exist.”

“That’s kind of morbid, don’t you think?”

I really need to work the words through in my head before saying them out loud. “I’m saying we live like there’s no tomorrow.”

“Better.” When she smiles, I smile. “Still doesn’t help me relax, but I appreciate you trying.”

“Kayla, come on.”

Her smile widens. “Now who’s too tense?” This time, she steals a kiss and leaves me wanting more.

“What was that for?”

“To say I’m sorry for being so bitchy these past few days. I can’t get out of my own head. I’ve worked myself into a panic over this business case. What if I screw up and the firehouse ends up on the chopping block for not taking any of my recommendations?”

“Not possible.” God, I hope. That would mean this past year working my ass off to get on with the department was a complete waste of time. Being with TREX helps pay the bills, but I don’t want to be a fulltime field agent. That may suit the generation before me, but I have a life and want to live it before settling into my role of TREX Agent Jake Swanson. I want to be plain old Jake Swanson for a little while longer. That requires a job outside the covert agency.

“First off,” I continue, hoping to convince us both. “You’re cutting expenses, not creating new ones. Second, the cap doesn’t have to do any of the stuff you recommend. The firehouse isn’t in any danger of closing whether we cut expenses or not. This is a school project, not life or death. There’s no risk.”

“Without risk, there’s no reward.” Her eyes widen as if she’s just recited something revolutionary. I’m pretty sure that’s on motivational posters in every office across the country. She looks at me and lets out a short breath. “That’s it.”

“What’s it?”

“I need to take risks.”

“I could have told you that.” She’s just now realizing that?

She giggles, the sound warming my blood. She then shouts into the air. “I need to take risks!”

“Or no reward.” I play along, not really sure where she’s going with this, but it’s better than the silent treatment from earlier, so I go with it.

“No reward.” She nods, like whatever the hell she’s saying makes perfect sense. I’m lost. “That’s why I’m struggling with this. I don’t want to take any risks. The captain took a risk by hiring me. I need to take risks on my delivery. That’s it. Thank you!” She kisses me soundly. I still have no idea what’s going on, but I like the way she thanks me for it.

The movie starts and everyone cheers as they all jump to their feet. The entire park is dancing along to the footwork during the opening credits. We laugh and drink, trying not to spill our wine as we mimic the steps. It’s a lot harder than it looks.

Once the credits finish, the crowds settles. I take the moment to refill our wineglasses as Ryan refills theirs. We exchange glances and grin like a couple of idiots. Without a word, we return to our blankets. I lean against the pillow and pull Kayla to me. She gets comfortable and leans her head on my chest. The scent of her shampoo invades my senses and tickles my nose. It’s like spicy vanilla. Leaning in, I inhale deeply as I kiss the top of her head.

It turns out movies in the park are nothing more than excuses for the moviegoers to act out the entire script. As the movie opens and the preacher is preaching away, several around us recite every word, some of them doing a better job than the actor playing the role. I love this movie, but I don’t know it word-for-word. Neither does Kayla, so we look at each other awkwardly and shrug before taking long pulls from our wine.

That’s when we catch Emma playing the role of the preacher’s daughter while Ryan laughs. It’s a side of the scary ginger waitress I’ve never seen.

By the time it’s to the tractor scene, we’re out of wine. Ryan and I snag each other’s attention and both hold up empty bottles. Damn it. So much for stealing some of theirs. Maybe one of the food trucks serves drinks. Just as I shift to stand, my phone buzzes. I check the number and frown. I hate blocked IDs. More than likely, it’s TREX, so I peel away from Kayla.

“Where are you going?”

“I’m going to see if any of these food trucks serve wine.”

“I’ll go with you.” Ryan jumps to his feet and holds up his phone as he catches my eye. Yep, definitely TREX.

We slip behind the giant tree and both answer our phones. “Swanson.”

“Ryan.”

“Are you with your partner?” It’s Jackson.

I face Ryan. “Yes.”

“Becoming quite chummy, aren’t we?”

Dick. “What can I do for you?”

“Wait.” Ryan loses his color. “You want me to what?”

“Time for your next assignment,” Jackson states. “It’s a bit of a role-reversal for you and Ryan.”

I glance at him. He’s now stuttering as he paces and thrusts his hand through his hair. “I heard you the first time. I’m just having a hard time processing it.”

Processing what? “Jackson, what’s going on?”

“We need you both in Seattle.”

“When?” Please don’t say within the next two weeks.

“This weekend.”

“I have finals.”

“And we have a secret society to bring down,” he counters.

“The Order?” I ask as Ryan asks the same. We catch each other’s attention and way too much passes between us. He’s anxious. I’m annoyed. He’s eager to know more. I’m eager to get back to the movie. Clearly we have different levels of interest in this call.

“There’s a function this weekend at the Edgewater in Seattle. We need you there to gather intel.”

Jackson’s order pulls me back to the conversation. “You want me to gather intel?”

“While Ryan goes in. It’s invitation only. Stuart Ryan received an invite. His son can go in his place.”

“What about Vic Greene? Did he get one?”

He laughs. “That would be a hard no. The Order knows Greene is the head of the agency. They don’t like anything to do with TREX.”

I square my shoulders as Ryan’s spine grows rigid. He holds my gaze. I hold his. He opens and closes his mouth several times, so I jump in, conveying what he wants to say. “Ryan gathers the intel, not me.”

“Not this time.”

If I’m gathering the intel, that means… “You’re sending Ryan into the field?”

“Holy shit,” Ryan mutters and loses more of his color. “I’m not ready. No, I’m really not. I wish I had that same level of confidence.”

“TREX thinks he’s ready,” Jackson explains.

I turn from Ryan and lower my voice. “You don’t think so?”

“I don’t think he’s you.”

Obviously. That’s not necessarily a bad thing—except maybe when you send him in on a field assignment he’s not ready for. “Meaning?”

“He’s not a natural at this. You are. You have instincts. You read the situation and adapt. Ryan doesn’t. If he can’t look it up on a computer, the kid is lost.”

“Why send him into the field then? You can override this, can’t you? You’re the SAC on this, damn it.”

“Not anymore. Snyder showed up and assumed the role.”

“The assistant director?” My guts twist. What the hell were they doing sending in rookies on a mission that warranted the attention of an assistant director of the agency? And why am I so worked up about this?

I know why. I can handle the stress. The pressure of a last-minute assignment. Hell, I chose a profession where I rush into burning buildings for a living. I got this.

It’s my partner who’s at risk. Without risk, there’s no reward. Well, shit. Just when I think there’s no likeliness between my girl and my partner, I go and blow that all to hell with a single, simple statement.

“Make it work,” Jackson tells me, like it’s that easy. “Report in at 0700 for the briefing.”

“Sir, I don’t think… Hello? Jackson?” The son of a bitch hung up on me. I turn to Ryan, who’s now lost all his color and is sweating. Concern replaces my annoyance. “Are you okay?”

“No.” He releases a shaky breath. “I can’t…I’m not ready…I just can’t.”

“Easy, man.” I hold him by the shoulders. He’s trembling. “What’s the assignment exactly?” And why put you into the field instead of me?

“You make it look so easy. I’m not you!”

“Ryan. Dude. Talk to me.” I can’t help but see the parallel in the way I’m handling him the way I handle Kayla. Clearly, they both tend to work themselves into near panic attacks. Insulting Ryan on the mat earned me a lecture from him and unsolicited advice from Bailey. Insulting Kayla would have ended with me earning a black eye. Based on the look in Ryan’s hard expression, if I so much as use the wrong tone right now, he’ll completely lose his shit. “What’s going on? What’d they say?”

“They’re sending me in.”

Shit. I can’t believe this is happening. I’m the field agent. He’s the intel. That’s the deal. I risk my life while he stays in the van. He’s not ready. Hell, I’m not even ready. I recite the same words that seemed to work for Kayla. “Without risk, there’s no reward.”

He blinks for several seconds as that sinks in. He then nods. “You’re right. I’ll never get close enough to take down the Order if I don’t take risks.”

Holy hell. That worked?

“How do we explain this to the girls?”

I shrug and pull the douche card. I hate to do it—I’d rather burn the bastard card than fall back into my douchy ways—but it’s what I know and right now, it’s what we need. “We don’t tell them anything. It’s not like we’re married. Hell, we’re not even a thing.”

“I am,” he fires back, a burn in his eyes that causes me hesitation. He’s got the start of a great intimidating look going. If he perfects it, he may just stand a chance in the field. Granted he can do it by Saturday.

I can’t let my concern for him cloud my focus. He needs to keep his focus as well. Worried about what Emma will think every time he’s out on assignment isn’t helping. Am I worried what Kayla will think? Yes. Am I going to let it get in the way of my job? No. It’s a lesson I need to teach Ryan.

“We need to get back.” I take a step away from the tree.

Ryan stops me. “We said we were going for wine.”

“No, we said we’d check to see if any of the food trucks served wine. They don’t.”

“We didn’t even check.”

“They don’t know that.”

He stops me again. “We can’t just lie to them.”

“Watch me.” I move out of his reach and return to Kayla. She smiles and sits up to allow me to assume my position and role as her support. I hold on that thought. I really am her support, not just as a backrest, but in life. At least right now. And, in turn, she’s been mine.

We really are leaning on each other. I love it and am a little terrified at the same time.

“No wine?” Emma asks as Ryan joins her.

“Sorry. The, uh…um…the…”

Why the hell is he stuttering? He’ll never make it in the field if he can’t even lie to his girlfriend. Lying to a stranger may seem easy enough—until you need to recall what you said. I jump in before he screws up this night for us both. “Food trucks were closed.”

“Makes sense,” Kayla says and curls into me. I pull her in closer to keep her warm, safe. “That’s okay. It’s at the dance. We’ve got maybe ten minutes left. People are already getting up.”

“That’s so we can dance.” Emma jumps to her feet and pulls Ryan to his. When we stare at them, they wave for us to join in. “Come on. It’s the best part of movies at the park. Last week, it was Mamma Mia. You should have seen the outfits.”

“Outfits?” I stand and help Kayla up.

“People dress the parts. It’s awesome.”

“I don’t see any costumes.”

“Why do you think there’s so much flannel and cowboy hats?”

I glance around. There really is a ridiculous amount of flannel in the crowd. That’s when I notice several—guys and girls alike—dressed in the iconic red tux jacket. As I sweep the scene, I catch two guys watching me. I don’t look away. They do. Odd. Why’d they have their attention on me? Or maybe they were eyeing Kayla. Either way, I don’t like it and keep redirecting my gaze to them. They don’t look my way again.

The movie’s love theme plays over the speakers and all the couples rock back and forth. I dismiss the two and open my arms as I smile at Kayla. “Can I have this dance?”

She smiles and walks into my embrace. We sway to the music. Hell yeah, this really is almost paradise. I hum along and run my hands up and down her back. She leans closer and joins in. We lean our foreheads together, eyes closed, and take in the moment. Grasping her hand, I hold it to my chest as I rest the other on the small of her back.

“I don’t want this moment to end.” Kayla sighs and rests her head on my shoulder. I release her hand and wrap her in my arms. “Ever.”

“Neither do I.”

“Looks like we found something else we do well together. It’d be nice if we found other things that don’t end in a fight.”

“We’ll just have to keep working together until we do.”

“I like the way you said that. We’ll work together. Like a partnership.”

“Like a relationship.” My chest tightens as those words sink in. Holy Jesus. I’m in a relationship for the first time since moving to Bainbridge Island to attend BU. It’s not like I haven’t had the opportunity. Why now? Why this woman? Why is Kayla Riggs so different?

I know why. It’s not Kayla who’s different. It’s me. She makes me want to be a better person. She makes me want to be more than who I am. I never want to let her go. Not in a month. Not at the end of summer. Not ever. The thought of holding anyone else like this, dancing with someone other than the woman in my arms, makes my world too dark. I don’t want to live in a world full of darkness. She brightens it. She brightens everything.

Sometime during our dance, the music stops. Even when it starts to rain, we don’t stop swaying. It’s our time, our moment, and we don’t want to ever let it go. We aren’t ready for reality to sink back in. The rain picks up, drenching us. Only then do we finally break our embrace and both glance at the sky. Figures we have a perfect evening, only for it to end in a downpour.

It doesn’t slow the moviegoers. Suddenly the crowd shouts, “Let’s dance!” The theme song blasts and everyone cheers as we all dance in the rain like complete idiots. Kayla’s laughing as she keeps wiping her wet hair from her face. It’s so goddamn captivating seeing her like this. I can’t look away.

I slow and pant as I stare at how stunning she is. She stops and holds my gaze. When she sucks her bottom lip between her teeth and bites down, I come undone and cup her cheeks in my hands before devouring her lips. I can’t get enough of her. Her taste. Her essence. I’ll never get enough.

We’re still consumed in each other when the movie ends. I vaguely hear Ryan ask if they should split us up. Emma smartly responds by dragging him away. Only when I hear snickering and comments from moviegoers passing us to get to the parking lot do I finally break our kiss by nipping on her bottom lip.

She looks into my eyes, her pupils dilated. She doesn’t have to say anything. I know exactly what she wants. Without a word, we pack up and rush home, where we drop everything as soon as we close the apartment door behind us.

“I need to ask you something.” Her comment causes me to stop working the buttons on my shirt. “What you said at the park… Are you really falling for me?”

I slide closer and wipe strands of wet hair from her cheek. “I may have already fallen.”

“Seriously?” Her question comes out an octave higher than her regular voice.

I kiss her nose. “Why is that so hard to believe? I think I’m falling in love with you, Kayla. Now, are we going to keep talking? Or are we going to fool around?”

She grins and jerks my shirt open, sending the remaining buttons flying. I’ve never been so turned on in my life. “I don’t plan on sleeping alone tonight,” she informs me as she chews on my ear.

“I don’t plan on sleeping tonight,” I counter and help her out of her shirt.

With a wide grin, she leads me down the hall. “I like how you said it better.”

So do I.