“So? How’d it go?” Silas asked when I answered his call.
I turned my car down Main Street, smiling. “Great. I aced it.”
“I knew you would.” I couldn’t see it, but I knew he was smiling too. “Pax and I are going to the café for dinner tonight. Meet us there? I’ll buy you a congratulatory bacon cheeseburger.”
My lip curled at the thought of seeing Paxon. Not only had he been an asshole to me but he’d also been occupying all of Silas’s time. I hadn’t seen Silas since the night Paxon had arrived, and though I missed Silas’s company, I had no desire to celebrate anything in Paxon’s presence.
“I’d be a horrible dinner guest. I’m exhausted from the trip so I think I’m going to swing into Maple’s for a hot chocolate and then go home to watch TV. I’ll probably fall asleep on the couch.”
It wasn’t entirely a lie. I was tired. I’d gotten up before dawn to drive the four hours to Missoula, where the realtor licensing exam had been administered. My early morning alarm paired with the stress of the actual test, plus the drive back, had drained all my energy reserves. I was looking forward to a relaxing evening in my sweatpants.
“How about tomorrow?” he asked.
“I can’t. Jess and Gigi invited me to tag along to their Friday-night dinner at the café. What are you doing this weekend?”
“I’ve got a list, like always.” Silas’s to-do list resembled an encyclopedia.
“Do you think you could get away? I was thinking about going to a movie.”
“Just text me when. I’ll make time.”
My smiled widened. “Okay. Bye.”
I parked in front of Maple’s and walked inside. My smile turned to a grimace when I saw a pair of black eyes watching me stroll through the door.
Shouldn’t he be at the ranch?
“Hello, Paxon. Here to taint another one of my favorite places?”
There went the snark. Silas was definitely going to hear about this one. Damn.
“Felicity. How are you?”
Like he really cared. “I’m fantastic. You?” Like I really cared.
“Awesome.” He leaned back in his chair and crossed his arms over his bulky chest. His legs were planted wide and he kicked out the chair across from him. “Join me.”
Was that an invitation or an order? I couldn’t tell.
“I’d love to. Really,” I said dryly, “but I’m just grabbing something to go before I head home. I need to wax my eyebrows and I think that would be less painful than sharing a coffee with you.”
Sonovabitch! What was wrong with me? I’d been doing so well at keeping my attitude in check, but today my pent-up bitchy retorts were coming out like a tidal wave. Though, in my defense, this guy had it coming.
The corner of his mouth twitched. Was he laughing at me? Asshole.
“Listen,” he said, “I think we’d better clear the air. Silas reamed my ass last week because I was a dick to you and I promised him I’d make it right.”
I stifled a smug grin at the thought of Silas setting Paxon straight. “Fine,” I muttered. “Just let me grab a coffee.” I didn’t offer to buy him a refill. He could pay for his own drinks.
With a huge mocha in hand, I returned to his table.
“Chitchat first or should I just get to the point?” he asked.
I did like people that cut right to it. “By all means, let’s get this blessed event over with.”
He grinned. “So, you gotta know. Silas and I met not long after he joined the army. He was fucked up about you back then. It took years for him to open up about what had happened when you guys were kids but that hurt was still there. I’ll always take his back so it shouldn’t surprise you that I don’t like you much.”
That hurt. It came as no surprise but it still didn’t feel good to hear. Silas had let me off easy that night at the café when I’d apologized. I hated that he’d taken my leaving so hard and that it had taken him years to get over it.
“You should know,” I said, “that I never meant to hurt him, but I was a stupid kid, not that it’s any excuse.”
“Yeah, well, he also set me straight that things had changed. Sorry about the other night. Some of those hits were below the belt.”
“Thank you,” I sat back, a bit stunned. “Apology accepted.”
He chuckled and took a sip of his coffee. “Well, fuck. That was easier than I thought it would be.”
“Really? What did you expect?”
“I was prepared for you to dump hot coffee on my lap. I guess I always pictured you with horns and a forked tail.”
“Hmm.” I took a sip of my coffee but didn’t respond. He’d see my horns and forked tail if he ever mentioned one of Silas’s old hook-ups again. And if this nice-guy apology was all a ruse, my coffee wasn’t going in his lap; he’d be getting it in the face.
“So, you just moved back?”
“Yep.” I took another sip.
“And your family is still here?”
I set down my cup and studied his face. His eyes were smiling and he looked genuinely interested in my answer. Okay, he was trying. I’d give him credit for that. And it would mean a lot to Silas if we could get along, so I sat all the way back in my chair and decided to give Paxon Montero another chance.
“Yes, my family is all still here. What about you? You’re from California?”
He nodded. “Born and bred.”
“What made you decide to go into the military?”
“Funny story.”
For the next hour, I got to know Paxon Montero. Turned out, he wasn’t much of an asshole. On the contrary, he was a big sweetheart and I was glad that we’d been able to start over.
“You’re easy to talk to, Felicity,” he said as we walked outside.
Though our conversation had started out light, with stories from his adolescence and how he’d found himself enlisted in the army, time had passed and Paxon had become more serious. He’d confided in me about some of the horrors he’d seen in Iraq, and it was clear that he was struggling with demons he’d brought home from overseas.
“I’m always looking for coffee companions. Call me anytime,” I said.
“You mean that?”
I answered by giving him my phone number.
“I don’t know what to do about the weather up here. Last week it was snowing. Today it was in the sixties,” Paxon said.
He was sitting at the small table in my breakfast nook while I was in the kitchen, cooking pasta for dinner.
I laughed. “March is tough. It’s just so unpredictable.”
It had been two weeks since I’d met Paxon at the coffee shop, and in that time, he’d attached himself to my side. Whenever he hadn’t been working on the ranch or hanging out with Silas, he had been here with me.
Talking.
And I had been listening.
Paxon’s demons made mine look like teddy bears. In my house sat a man with burdens I couldn’t even fathom.
I usually had no idea what to say when he confided in me. The first few times, I had urged him to talk to Silas but he’d refused. Why, I wasn’t sure, but Paxon had been adamant about keeping our conversations between us. So I’d opened my ears and promised my mouth would stay closed. His secrets were safe as long as they didn’t threaten his wellbeing or safety.
“You and Silas didn’t have big Friday-night plans? No night out at the Silver Dollar or Claim Jumper?” I asked.
“I couldn’t find him earlier and he didn’t answer his phone.”
“Oh, I see how it is. I’m second fiddle.”
“Yep.”
“You could at least pretend to like me more. Inflate my ego a bit.”
“Right. Sorry. Next time.” He grinned as I went back to cooking. Pax was a handsome man and, in a different place and time, maybe boyfriend material. But my heart was for Silas only.
If he wanted it.
All he had to do was take it.
Silas
“Pax?” I called into my apartment as I shrugged off my coat.
I had just gotten back from working in the Quonset. I’d been having trouble with a tractor earlier and found out that it wasn’t going to be a simple fix that I could do myself, which meant a call to the mechanic and a hefty service bill on top of my already shit day.
Dad and I had gotten into a rip-roaring fight this morning that had left Mom in tears as she tried to mediate. I was an ass for putting her in the middle and not controlling my temper with Dad. Then, on top of all that, the tractor had broken down.
I needed a beer, or five, and some time spent away from the ranch tonight. Only two things stood a chance of snapping me out of this mood: sex or beer. The only woman I wanted to have sex with was Felicity, and since that wasn’t going to happen, beer would have to do.
Where was Pax? He was always up for a trip to town.
The situation with Felicity had been weighing heavily on my mind. Slow had turned to stagnant, and with Pax as my house guest, I’d hardly seen her. I cursed myself for not getting more than a barely there kiss in the barn. I’d gone for the slow burn when I should have picked fast heat. We’d been so close that night to crossing the line. So fucking close.
Paxon’s timing had been worse than a broken stopwatch’s.
I’d been glad to see him until he’d opened his asshole mouth, tossing out that comment about the woman I’d hooked up with in Seattle. Fucker. We’d had words about that one.
But the damage had been done. I’d felt the pain that flashed through Felicity’s body. Was that why she’d been distant? Over two weeks, and she’d disappeared completely. I didn’t know what was going on in her head. Every time I got close, she froze. It wasn’t in a scared or nervous way, she would just turn solid. Like she refused to move and meet me in the middle.
Maybe it was time to do something drastic. Get us out of this rut. But I was worried about scaring her away.
Beer. I needed beer.
“Pax,” I called again after pulling off my boots and walking down the hallway. “Gone again?” He’d been disappearing lately. I smiled and shook my head. “Didn’t take you long, man,” I said into the empty room. Paxon had a way with the ladies. He had probably gotten bored out here alone and had found a hookup in town.
Walking to the fridge for a beer, I paused to read a note on the counter.
Princess,
Going to dinner at Felicity’s house.
Be back late. If I come back at all.
Might just stay there.
—P
What. The. Fuck.
My vision turned red.
She was mine and he was a fucking dead man.
I crumpled the note and stormed down the hallway for my coat and boots. The door shook as I slammed it shut with a rage I hadn’t felt in years.
After all that I’d done for him, he repaid me by going after Felicity? And what the fuck was she doing? Was Pax the reason she’d pulled away from me?
The drive to town went by in a furious haze. I parked and marched right up to her door, peering inside, hoping that I had misunderstood Paxon’s note and there was another Felicity in Prescott that I didn’t know about.
Nope. There they were, laughing and talking in her kitchen. Her beautiful face was split in a wide smile and Paxon was making wild gestures as he told her a story.
My blood started boiling and my temper wiped out any rational thought. I exploded through the door, ignoring the shocked gasp from Felicity and bolting straight for my “friend.”
Paxon held up his hands in surrender but grinned. The fucker grinned!
I didn’t slow, plowing right into him and grabbing him by his shirt to shove him against the wall. “What the fuck do you think you’re doing?” I roared into his face. “She belongs with me!”
His grin widened. What the fuck was wrong with him?
Before I could ask, his hands came up and started pushing me away. “Come on, let me go.” When I didn’t, the smirk on his face fell. “Silas, man, let me go.” He fought to get out of my grasp, but I didn’t budge. We were pretty evenly matched physically but I had rage on my side.
“Let me go!” His own rage sparked behind his dark eyes. Just like all the times we’d boxed together, that was the sign he was about to unleash hell.
Bring it on.
“What the fuck are you doing with her?” My jaw was clenched so tightly, my teeth didn’t move as I spoke.
Paxon didn’t answer. Instead, he let go of his temper. He pushed hard and I rocked back but then I used all my strength to slam his back into the wall again. This time he twisted, jerking my arm locked on his to the side. We both dipped and he lost his footing, so I was able to keep him pinned to the wall. Using all of my weight and every ounce of my strength, I kept him trapped as he struggled to get free. We were so lost in our grappling battle that neither of us noticed Felicity approaching from the side.
Then I was wet.
My face was soaked with cold water and I blinked furiously to clear the drops from my eyes. The surprise made me lose my grip on Pax’s arms and he jerked free. He was wet too.
And the fucker was grinning again, his anger evaporated. “She is perfect for you, princess.”
“What?” I rubbed both hands over my face, clearing away more water that was dripping out of my hair.
“Well, that was fun,” Pax said. He turned to Felicity who stood by our sides.
She was holding two empty glasses.
And she was pissed.
Well, too fucking bad, babe. I was pissed too. “You want to tell me what is going on here?”
Her answer was curling a lip and slamming the glasses onto the counter. Then with two hands planted firmly against my chest, she pushed me backward with all her might.
Was she kicking me out of her house? To be with Pax? No fucking way. “Felicity—”
“Shut up,” she snapped and kept pushing until the backs of my knees hit a chair and I had to sit.
My eyes were glued to her angry scowl when her hands clapped to the sides of my face. She bent low to look me right in the eyes. “You’re an idiot.”
Then she crushed her mouth to mine for a hard, fast kiss. She let me go, spinning away before I could react. Paxon was behind her, staring at us, smiling like a fool. I just stayed in my chair, staring at them both like—what had she called me?—an idiot.
“Thanks for dinner, Felicity,” Paxon said.
“You’re welcome. Let me know if you decide on house hunting. There’s a couple of nice places on the market right now.”
“Will do.” He walked toward the door, stopping when he reached my side to clap a hand on my shoulder. “About time you pulled your head outta your ass. I should have left you that note a week ago.”
Fuck. I’d played right into the bastard’s hands.
My shoulders slumped. So I may have overreacted. I couldn’t help it. The thought of Felicity with any other man made me lose my mind. When the door closed behind Paxon, I looked up from my lap to see Felicity with her arms crossed over her chest.
“Sorry.”
She dropped her arms to her sides and frowned. “You’re an idiot.”
I nodded. “Pretty much.”
“Now what?”
Now you tell me that I’m the man you want.
Now you kiss me again.
Now I pick you up and carry you to the couch, where those clothes will come off and I’ll spend the next two days buried inside you.
But I didn’t tell her any of that. Instead, I told her what I had always told her when she’d asked me that question.
“Whatever you want.”
Felicity
Whatever I want?
I faced away from him and planted my hands on the counter. It was look away or storm across the room and strangle him.
Whatever I want?
You! I want you, you big dumbass!
In front of me was the plate of oatmeal cookies I’d made for dessert. I reached for one and held its chewy goodness in my hand.
“I’ve been waiting and waiting,” I said. “Hoping you would finally decide to make a move.”
I spun back around and flung the cookie at him, flicking it like a Frisbee. The cookie fell short so I reached behind me and grabbed another, this time giving it an extra zing. Still not quite enough.
“What are you doing?” He stood from the chair, staring at me like I had gone cuckoo.
“All this time and this is how you do it?” I yelled. “You come in here, your temper way out of control, and almost pick a fight with your friend?”
I went back for another cookie. This time, I hit my mark. He tried to block it but the cookie smacked him right in the face before crumbling to the floor.
“Hey! Stop throwing cookies at me.”
“You deserved that!”
He swiped the crumbs from his face. “You think it was my move to make? What about you? You could have come after me for once.”
This time I grabbed a whole handful of cookies and whipped them in his direction, littering the floor between us. “I have always come after you! Did it ever occur to you that I needed you to show me that you wanted me more than any of the obstacles in our way? Huh? That I was more important than your friendship with my ex-boyfriend? That even though I hurt you before, you were willing to take another chance on me?”
Any calm he’d had evaporated. “Did it ever occur to you that I needed you to choose me when there wasn’t a bunch of shit swirling around us? That I needed you to show me that you wanted me, just for me?”
We stared at each other for a moment, my chest heaving and his nostrils flaring. Then we were both moving, closing the distance between us with desperation.
My foot slipped on a cookie but Silas caught me before I could fall. His arms spanned my ribs and he hoisted me up against his chest. My arms and legs clung to him and I erased all of the space between us.
When I tipped my head down, lowering my mouth, his was open and waiting. His tongue swept in and twisted with mine, spreading fire through every nerve. Everything was hot. My skin. My lips. My sex. Everything.
Silas walked us backward, and when my ass hit the counter, I broke away from his mouth and pulled at his coat. I worked it frantically over his broad shoulders, and as he shrugged out of its sleeves, his mouth came to the sensitive skin underneath my jaw, sucking and kissing.
His fingers yanked at my navy sweater until they finally found its hem. Leaning back, he whipped it over my head before reaching to the base of his own gray shirt and doing the same. When his lips fused with mine, my hands rubbed all over his muscled chest. Feeling his chiseled abs brush against my stomach sent another jolt of heat to my core.
“Baby,” I whimpered when he pulled back.
“Up,” he ordered, grabbing my ass and sliding it off the counter. My legs swung around his hips and my ankles crossed at his back as he started walking. His tongue trailed along my neck and collarbone as he carried me upstairs.
“To the right,” I panted when we reached the landing. He obeyed and entered my dark bedroom. The faint light from the streetlights outside gave my white bedding a soft glow. When my back hit the mattress, Silas went to the button on my jeans. I wriggled my hips as he slid them down and off. I pushed up and went straight to the buckle on his belt. While I worked it open, he twisted the clasp on my bra.
My hurried fingers couldn’t get the zipper down fast enough on his jeans and I let out a frustrated groan. Silas’s deep chuckle filled the room as he stared down at me, his brown eyes so dark they looked black.
“Hurry,” I begged, letting him work his jeans off while I slipped off the straps of my bra.
Silas tucked his thumbs into the waistband of his jeans and off they came. Holy hell, he was going commando. That was so fucking hot. I stared at his thick, hard cock while he tugged off my satin panties and sent them flying over his shoulder.
“Mouth,” he ordered and I tossed back my chin just in time to catch his crashing lips. Holding tight to his shoulders, I stroked my tongue with his as he moved me further into the bed by the backs of my knees.
“Condom?” he asked.
I shook my head and felt his grin. Silas and I had never used a condom. He was the only man that I’d ever had inside of me bare. Some of my serious boyfriends, including Wes, had asked but I had always refused. Even though I was on the pill, I had required that barrier.
But not with Silas.
I didn’t want anything between us.
He lined his cock up with my slit and teased me, sliding himself up and down through my wetness. When it grazed my clit, I moaned and tipped my hips up to meet his.
“Please, baby.”
“What do you want, Lis?” he whispered.
“You. I want you.”
With one hard thrust, he drove into me to the root. “Fuck,” he groaned as I cried out.
I closed my eyes as I stretched around him. He filled me completely. Perfectly. I throbbed around him and pressed my hips up, urging him to move.
When he didn’t, I opened my eyes. He was staring down at me. The intensity of his gaze and the seriousness of his face surprised me. I lifted a hand to his cheek and caressed his stubble with my thumb.
“What’s wrong?” I asked.
“Nothing.” His eyes softened. “I just want to remember what you look like tonight. You’re so beautiful, Lis. And all mine.”
My heart swelled into my throat and I drew in a jagged breath. “Silas,” I choked out. I didn’t know what else to say. That was the sweetest thing I’d heard in a long, long time.
He dropped his forehead to mine and slowly eased his cock out, stopping when the tip was barely inside. I groaned at his loss and again lifted up my hips. My hands went to his sides and his muscles tensed as he slid back inside, inch by inch.
When I was full again, he lifted his head and looked into my eyes. “Ready?”
I nodded. Yeah, I was ready. More than ready.
He went from slow, restrained glides to powerful, frantic thrusts in an instant.
“Silas,” I gasped. My legs were shaking as he brought them up to his sides. His muscled thighs drove his hips and cock, sending me higher and higher with each powerful stroke.
With a rush of heat, I moaned and threw my head back into the pillow. “I’m com—” Before I could finish my sentence, my climax peaked and I exploded around Silas, pulsing and squeezing as it washed over me. Every muscle shook as my long and hard orgasm rendered me completely helpless.
“Lis.” His voice was rough and on edge. I was just coming down when his thrusts lost all control. Pounding into me, I opened my eyes just in time to see Silas’s corded neck tighten. His hot release spilled inside me.
His sweaty chest collapsed on mine and we held tightly to each other, panting for breath as our hearts thundered between us.
The after-sex with Silas was almost as good as the sex itself. Almost.
I loved that he would lay on me right after we came and our combined heartbeats drummed between us. The rhythm resonated across my arms to my fingertips and down my legs to my toes. It was like my body was saying, “This one. This one is the right one.”
My eyes closed as I enjoyed this closeness, this connection. He was heavy and he wouldn’t stay here for long, just enough to give me what I wanted.
“Are you okay?” he asked into my hair.
I hummed and wrapped my legs around his thighs, pulling him deeper.
He propped himself up on an elbow, brushing away the hair that had fallen on my forehead. “Lis?”
“Yeah?”
“I need to ask you something important.”
My eyes popped open and I searched his for a sign of anything bad. But they were happy, full of warmth and light. “What?”
“Did you throw all of the cookies?”
I giggled. “There’s probably a couple left.”
“Good. I’m hungry.” He slid out and rolled off the bed.
With one hand, he tugged me out too. He bent and grabbed his shirt, shaking it out before pulling it over my head. While I pushed my arms in, he stepped into his jeans, leaving his belt buckle hanging and the top button open. I could see a light dusting of hair at the zipper that traveled up his happy trail to his belly button.
Sexy. Damn sexy. I was ready to go again.
“If you keep staring at my cock, we’re never going to make it back to the kitchen.”
“Fine by me.” I let my eyes linger as they climbed his abs and chest to his handsome face. “I ate dinner.”
He smiled and captured my hand. “Come on, babe.”
After a quick pit stop in the bathroom, we walked downstairs hand in hand. I refused to let cookies be Silas’s dinner, so while he leaned up against a counter, I whipped him up some scrambled eggs.
“Sorry about coming over like I did.”
I looked over my shoulder and smiled. “I’m not.”
He sighed. “Fuck. I feel bad for getting physical with Pax.”
“He’s not doing well, Silas. He’s been coming over to talk to me about some stuff from the army but I don’t know what to say. I think you should try and talk to him. Maybe see if there is somebody in town that he could talk to, like a professional.”
“Yeah. I was thinking the same thing. He hasn’t talked to me, but he is jumpy as all hell. I cracked a whip at one of our bulls the other day and he dropped to the ground for cover.” He raked a hand through his hair. “And then I tried to fight him tonight.”
“What were you thinking? Did you really think I’d go for him?” I set his plate down in front of him.
“We’ve been in a weird place lately. I didn’t know what you wanted.”
“Do you now?”
“I’ve got a pretty good idea.” His eyes twinkled, and when he smiled, my knees wobbled.
“Good. I’m glad we don’t have to have a big discussion. That we can agree we’re better off as just friends,” I teased.
His fork fell to the counter and he lunged at me. I squealed and darted around the island, running up the stairs but I was too slow. He caught me at the hips and started tickling my sides.
“I’m kidding! Stop!” I laughed and begged but he was relentless.
“Are we friends?”
“No!”
“That’s right.” He stopped torturing me and bent low, shoving his shoulder in my belly and hauling me up into a fireman’s hold. My shirt flew up and my bare ass felt the cool air. “We’re friends with benefits.”
“Silas!” I said, smacking his butt. I knew he was joking but I couldn’t resist giving him a smack. That gorgeous behind was right in front of my face.
“Payback.” His hand cracked against my ass.
I yelped and started laughing again as he carried me upstairs and tossed me down on the bed. Off came his jeans and he proceeded to show me that we were definitely not just friends. Two orgasms later, we were both exhausted and ready to sleep.
“Are you still hungry?” I asked.
“Too tired. You can make me a big breakfast.”
I hummed my agreement. “This is nice.” I was tucked into his side while he lay on his back. My leg was thrown over his and our feet were gently playing. “We’ve only ever spent one whole night together. You always used to leave after. I could get used to this.”
He leaned down and kissed the top of my hair. “You better.”