I wake up the next morning to buzzing and banging. It takes me a couple of seconds in my sleepy haze to remember where I am.

I get out of bed, grab my dressing gown, and pull it around myself as I walk out to see who it is. When I get to the little screen, I see Mum and Aunt Addy stood waiting.

I press the button down to unlock the door and tell them to come in. I put the flat door on the latch and head over to fill the kettle, knowing they’re going to want tea. I quickly pull out a tea bag from the decaf box hidden at the back of the cupboard and pop it in my mug before they get to the top of the stairs.

“Morning,” I say when they enter.

“Hardly; it’s almost lunchtime,” Mum says as she follows behind Aunt Addy, making sure she gets to the sofa safely on her crutches.

“It’s not like you to sleep so late,” Aunt Addy says after taking in her surroundings. “Are you okay?”

“Blake came over last night,” I say.

When I turn around with two mugs in my hand I can’t help but laugh at the goofy smiles on their faces.

“Is he still here?” Aunt Addy whispers. “I told you we shouldn’t just turn up unannounced,” she says, turning to Mum.

“No, he’s not here. He just came around for dinner so we could talk.”

“And…” Mum prompts.

“And we’re talking.”

“Come on, Addison, spit it out, who the hell was the woman?”

“Ugh, fine.” I carry the tea over before sitting down on the chair opposite them and explaining everything Blake told me.

“He’s been escorting?” Aunt Addy asks, sounding shocked. “So you’re telling me that while I was babysitting Sinead, he was out wining and dining random women for money?” The way she says wining and dining takes me back to questioning Blake’s actions and wine knowledge at my birthday meal. I remember him saying something like I know how to treat a woman properly. Well, of course he does if he was being paid to fucking do it. I try to keep a lid on my anger. I may now understand what Blake was doing and why, but that doesn’t mean the thought of him spending all that time with those women makes me happy.

“And you believe him?” Mum asks.

“Blake’s not a liar, Bex,” Aunt Addy snaps, trying to defend him.

“Maybe not, but he was still out with another woman when he should have been with my daughter.” Wow, Mum getting all defensive for me? This is new.

“Maybe not, but you don’t know what that boy’s been through.”

“Okay, that’s enough, you two. To answer your question Mum, yes, I think I do believe him. I don’t like it, but I do. And we’re going to give it another shot, but,” I say quickly, before either of them can put their opinions in, “we’re taking it slow—starting again.”

“I think that’s a good idea. It got intense quite fast last time.” I can’t help but agree with Aunt Addy. I turned up in Ireland looking for a new life and I somehow fell head first into a new relationship that wasn’t just about the two of us but his daughter as well.

* * *

I wake up to a gorgeous spring day the following Sunday morning. The sun is shining bright and the birds are singing. I lie in bed for a few minutes, appreciating the peace Ireland has to offer, but it doesn’t last long, because when I swing my legs out of bed and sit up, I instantly have the urge to throw up.

I hear my phone ringing out in the living room while I’m bent over the toilet. Once I’m done, I brush my teeth and pull my hair back into a bun. When I see who was ringing, my stomach twists again, only not with morning sickness but with excitement.

I unlock my phone and call him straight back.

“Good morning, baker girl.”

“Morning, sorry I missed you. I was in the bathroom.”

“Umm…naked in the shower, I hope,” he says in a husky voice.

I almost laugh to myself before saying, “Yeah, something like that.”

“Anyway, Sinead said something about a picnic in the park and we wondered if you’d like to come with us.” I’m torn. I really want to say yes; I’m desperate to see Blake but I’m worried about allowing Sinead to see us happy again in case it doesn’t work out. She doesn’t need that. Blake must sense my thoughts, because after a few seconds of silence, he says, “I’ve had a chat with Sinead. I’ve told her we’re just friends.”

“Blake, I—”

“Please, Addison. I really want to see you.”

“Okay, fine,” I say, breaking down to the pathetic begging voice he puts on. “But if you’ve told her we’re just friends, we’ve got to act that way.”

“I can do that,” he states adamantly.

“Okay then,” I say, but I really doubt his ability. He’s always been too tactile when it comes to touching.

“We’ll pick you up at eleven.”

“Do I need to bring any food?”

“We thought you might like to supply dessert.”

“Okay, I’ll see what I can do.”

“I can’t wait to see you,” he says in a quieter voice.

“You too. I’ve got to go; I’ve got cakes to make,” I say, before hanging up. If he wants Sinead to ever believe we’re just friends, that sort of shit can’t be said.

I quickly have that shower before throwing on a pair of leggings and a loose dress. I may only be a few weeks pregnant and I’m not sure if I’m just being paranoid, but I feel so bloated already. I stand in front of the mirror and smooth my hands over my belly. There’s no way anyone would notice but it still makes me feel uneasy. I shouldn’t be keeping this from Blake. I tell myself I’m going to tell him the next time I have him alone. He deserves to know, and the longer it goes on, the worse the lie is going to get.

Once my hair and makeup are sorted, I head downstairs to make a batch of raspberry and white chocolate muffins. I’m just popping them into a box when I hear banging at the back door.

I scoop up the box and my bag before flicking the lights off and heading out.

The second I pull the door open, I’m assaulted by the scent that is Blake. My mouth waters and I fight with myself not to step into him. I run my eyes up his black t-shirt to his face. He’s smiling like he hasn’t seen me for a month as his eyes run all over me, igniting my body with just a look.

“Hey, baker girl. That smells amazing; what is it?” he asks, dragging his eyes from my face to the box in my hand.

“Muffins.”

“Umm, can I have taste of your muffins?” he asks with a smirk.

“Later. You can’t have cake before lunch,” I say, trying to steer this conversation back to where it should be. I glance over his shoulder to see Sinead watching us sheepishly from the middle seat of his van. “We should get going. Sinead’s waiting,” I add, pulling the door shut behind me and making sure it’s locked. I don’t miss Blake’s attempt to rearrange himself before he turns towards the van. “You need to behave.”

“I can’t help it. I only have to think of you, of how amazing you smell, how incredible you taste, and I’m hard for the rest of the fucking day,” he whispers as he follows me. My thighs clench at his words, making my steps falter a little. “Seems like I’m not the only one,” he mutters before opening the passenger door for me and taking the box from my hands. I shoot him a look of warning but he just laughs. That arsehole can read me too well.

“Hey,” Sinead whispers when I step up into the van. “I’m so glad you could come. I’ve missed you.”

“I’ve missed you too, sweetheart,” I say with a smile to show her everything’s okay between us. What’s done is done; there’s no point still being mad at her.

I chat to Sinead all the way to the park—okay, when I say chat, what I really mean is I listen to her tell me all about everything she’s been up to since I last saw her. The whole time, Blake sits in silence with an amused smile on his face. He looks over every now and then and catches my eye. His smile widens and it hits me exactly where he intends. When I warned him to be friendly, it wasn’t code for pretend-to-be-friendly-while-turning-me-on-to-epic-proportions-for-your-own-amusement. Arsehole.

Sinead picks out what she says is the perfect spot for our picnic, and we put the blanket down and get all the food out. The park is packed with others doing the same thing, along with dog walkers and joggers. I lose myself watching everyone else, imagining what their lives are like, and I totally miss Blake talking to me.

He places his giant hand on my thigh and I jump a mile at the contact.

“Shite, sorry,” he says, quickly removing his hand. “Go anywhere nice?”

“No, just people watching.”

“Help yourself to food. We’ve made enough to feed the five thousand.” I look down and see he’s right. Spread out on the blanket is everything you’d expect and then some—sandwiches, sausage rolls, crisps, veggies and dip…the list goes on. I grab the plastic plate Sinead holds out for me and dig in. I had a slice of toast for breakfast to settle my stomach but it didn’t fill me up for very long.

“Hungry?” Blake says with a laugh when he sees my plate.

“It looks too delicious not to,” I say, and it makes Sinead beam.

It’s a lovely afternoon. We’re sat under a tree and the sun peeks through the leaves, warming my skin as I lie out on the blanket after stuffing my face.

“I’m going to feed the ducks with the leftover bread,” Sinead says.

“Okay, we’ll be here.”

We both watch her walk off happily for a few seconds before I feel his gaze turn to me. “Thank you for coming. She’s really missed you. I didn’t realise before how much she needed a female in her life other than her grandmothers.”

“Don’t,” I warn. I don’t need him using Sinead to win me back around.

“I don’t mean it like that. I was just stating a fact. That night you did her makeup and helped her choose her outfit made it so obvious what she’s been missing out on.”

“You’ve done an amazing job, Blake. She has everything she needs. Don’t put yourself down.”

“I know, she’s incredible,” he says, as his eyes search her out over by the pond. “I’m not saying any of this to rush you. I know I fucked up, Adds, and I know I need to prove myself to you. I just miss what we had.”

“Me too,” I mutter.

His eyes glisten as they stare into mine. “Thank you for giving me a second chance. I promise I won’t let you down.”

“You’d better not, because if you hadn’t noticed, it’s not just me this affects. Look how happy she is right now,” I say, nodding my head to a smiling Sinead as she walks back our way.

“I know.”

“They just ignored it. I guess I’m not the first to try to feed them today,” Sinead says with a laugh. “They do all look at little fat.”

She just gets sat down when I feel someone approach us behind me.

“Blake, how are you doing?” A female voice purrs, and I turn around to see who it belongs to.

The second I lock my eyes on her face, I know exactly who it is, and I feel my anger begin to bubble up. She must be heading towards forty but she has an incredible figure accentuated by the dress she’s wearing. Her blonde hair is perfect—if not a little too big for my liking—and her makeup flawless. She screams money, and that’s without looking at her Gucci bag and Jimmy Choos.

I hate her.

“Hi, Shauna. I’m good, how are you?”

“So so,” she says with a wave of her hand. “It’s not the same, you know?” Her hand comes up to her neck and she slowly lowers it, trying to show off her cleavage.

I clench my fists at her attempted seduction and the mention of spending time with Blake. I glance over at Sinead but she’s grabbed another muffin and is mostly ignoring what’s going on.

“It was time to move on.” Is all Blake says.

“Looks like you’re having fun.” She takes her eyes off him for the first time and looks down to the blanket to find me staring daggers at her. “Is this your…sister?” she asks, looking me up and down.

“No,” Blake snaps. “She’s my…” I see him glance over to Sinead. I’ve no doubt if she wasn’t here his answer would be very different, but he has to hold his tongue for her benefit. “Friend.”

I know why he says it but the second the word falls from his mouth it’s like someone’s slapped me around the face. Shauna’s eyes sparkle and her lips quirk up in delight.

“Okay, well, nice to meet you,” she says before turning back to Blake and practically shoving her tits in his face. “You have my number. I’m free anytime, just give me a call.” As she says it, she bends down and places her hand on his forearm.

I’m all but ready to get up and drag her the fuck away from him by her hair if she doesn’t stop touching him and fuck off. A quick flick of her eyes over to me shows me she knows exactly what she’s doing. Fucking hussy.

“I’ll bear that in mind,” Blake says politely, his voice giving nothing away. I realise he’s pulled some kind of mask on; he’s in escort mode. I stare at his expressionless face as he politely speaks to Shauna and removes her hand from him. As I watch, I realise just how much I hate what he’s been doing. It’s not just that he was spending time with different women while with me, it’s the fact that he clearly doesn’t enjoy it. The effort he’s putting in is obvious, and he did all that for Sinead.

Eventually, Blake manages to get rid of Shauna. He pulls his wallet out of his back pocket and thrusts a ten-pound note towards Sinead as he instructs her to go and get us ice creams.

“Don’t be angry,” he says, turning his gaze to me.

“Don’t be angry,” I repeat. “She just stood there practically drooling over you in front of not only me, your friend, but also your daughter,” I snap. My anger has got the better of me and I can’t help it when my mouth opens before my brain engages. “She was so fucking blatant, the way she was towards you. Are you sure you haven’t fucked her?”

“Addison,” Blake warns. “Keep your voice down.”

“You fucking have, haven’t you?”

“No, I haven’t. I told you I didn’t touch any of them.”

“That’s not how it looked. The way she touched you,” I seethe.

“Enough,” he snaps when he sees Sinead heading our way, trying to juggle three 99s with flakes sticking out.

“Thanks, Lil’ bit,” Blake says, plastering on a smile. I just about manage the same but I’m desperate to get out of here and away from Blake. I have no idea what I believe right now.

“Are you okay? You look a bit green,” Blake asks a few minutes later while I’m sat trying to eat my ice cream instead of throw up on it.

“I’m not feeling great. Could you take me home, please?”

Blake’s face drops but he agrees, and once he’s finished his cone he starts packing everything up.

The journey back is silent. Sinead tries asking Blake who the woman was but she soon gets shot down and doesn’t say another word. I’m still battling both my nausea and my lingering anger.

“Thanks for inviting me, Sinead,” I say when Blake pulls up behind the bakery.

“Thanks for coming.”

“See you soon.” I hop out of the van and make a beeline for the door.

“Addison, wait,” I hear Blake shout, but I wave him off and let myself in, knowing he won’t make a scene in front of Sinead. That doesn’t mean I don’t expect him to try again as soon as he can, but right now, I don’t have the energy to deal with him.

I haul my sorry arse up the stairs and let myself into the flat. I dump my stuff on the dining room table, grab myself a glass of water, and go straight to the bathroom to run a bath.

I find my iPod and press play on my relaxing playlist.

I just about manage to contain my sigh of pleasure as I lower myself into the soothing water. I rest back and try to rid thoughts of Shauna and Blake from my mind. I know I shouldn’t have snapped at him and I do believe him when he says he hasn’t slept with her, but just her presence pissed me off. It was a reminder of the shock of seeing them in that restaurant together, of believing history was repeating itself and I was being cheated on. Again.

I’ve no idea how long I’m in the bath but by the time I get out, the water is only lukewarm and my skin is pruned nicely. I wrap a towel around myself before walking out to the kitchen to refill my glass.

My heart flies into my chest when the front door suddenly flies open, banging back against the wall.

“What the fuck are you doing?” I ask in shock when I look up to find Blake walking in.

“Coming to prove to you that you’re the only one I want,” he says as he continues striding towards me with determination.

He doesn’t stop when he gets to me so I’m forced to step back, but I bump into the cabinet.

“What are you—” My question gets cut off when his hands land on the sides of my neck and his lips touch mine. I’m so shocked I don’t react for a few seconds, but it doesn’t take much encouragement for me to open for him. His tongue sweeps into my mouth and caresses mine. He tells me everything he needs to through his kiss and I lap it all up. His hands slide up into my hair and he holds me tightly, stopping me from ending it.

“None of them meant anything, Addison,” he says as he runs his lips across my jaw and starts kissing my neck. “None of them. It’s you I want. It’s you I’m in love with.”

My body’s alive, having his lips on me, but the second those words leave his mouth, everything stops. I stop thinking. I stop feeling. “What?”

“I’m in love with you, Addison. I have been for quite a while. I just didn’t know when the right time to tell you was.”

“You’re in love with me?” I ask, like it’s the most insane thing I’ve ever heard. My heart pounds as I wait for his response.

“Yes. I love you.”

“Good, because I love you too,” I admit quietly.

His lips twitch as the beginning of a smile I know will knock me on my arse threatens to break free. “A little louder.”

“I love you too.” I don’t really get the too out because Blake’s kissing me again.

“Fuck, Addison,” he mutters as he lifts me. My legs go around his waist and he carries me towards my bedroom, his lips never leaving my skin.

I get placed on my feet at the bottom of the bed. I’ve only just balanced when the towel that was around me gets tugged away. I stand there totally bare while Blake shamelessly stares at my body.

“Missed these curves, so fucking sexy,” he rasps before squeezing both of my tender breasts. The second he flicks my sensitive nipples I forget all about the pain because it sends an intense electric bolt straight to my clit. My nipples were always sensitive but this is something else. Blake notices my reaction and leans forward to take one in his mouth. The moan I let out when his hot mouth surrounds me is porn star worthy. His eyes look up at me and I can see my desire reflected.

He pulls off my nipple with a pop before giving the other one the same attention. If he continues, I swear I could come from just this alone.

After a minute or two, I feel his fingers brush against my thighs. He gives them a nudge, encouraging me to open them. As soon as I do, I feel his fingers run the length of me. My hips buck and I start to beg. I should be embarrassed by my impatience but I can’t find it in me to care enough.

The second he parts me and I feel him graze my clit, my head falls back and my eyes close as the sensations engulf my entire body.

“Oh fuck, Blake.”

“Fuck, you’re sensitive. Have you missed me?” he asks cockily.

I’m not in any fit state to respond appropriately as he slowly slides his fingers inside me. I’m riding right on the edge of falling head first into my orgasm.

“Come on my fingers now, Addison.” I feel him graze that one spot that ensures I’ll come on demand. My entire body shakes as wave after wave of pleasure slams into me.

“ARGH,” I scream when I feel myself flying. My orgasm has barely subsided when Blake lifts me off my feet and throws me onto the bed.

Once my eyes focus, I watch as he pulls his t-shirt over his head and drops it on the floor before he climbs on the bed and straddles me. His hands land either side of my head, caging me in before he lowers so he can kiss me. His kiss is enough to spark up the beginnings of my next orgasm. When I start panting, he begins descending down my body. He kisses, licks and nips every inch of skin he can get to. By the time he hits my belly button, I’m squirming and begging for more.

“Blake, please, I need you.”

“You need me to do what?” he asks against my hipbone.

“In me, I need you in me.”

He hums, and the vibrations hit me straight in the clit.

“Blake.”

His kisses down my legs before spreading them. He places my feet on the duvet and holds me open. I watch as he looks directly at my core. “So fucking beautiful.” His words make me blush and I try to shut my legs. “Too late to be shy now, Addison, you’ve already come on my fingers.”

“Ugh,” I groan when I feel him blow a stream of warm air against me.

“And now you’re going to come on my tongue,” he says before his head disappears between my thighs.

My fingers tangle in his hair as he licks me. My legs try to shut again but he holds them wide as he begins sucking on my already swollen clit.

“Oh fucking yes, oh Blake, fuck,” I chant as he continues his sweet torture.

He adds two fingers and I fall apart. My entire body twitches and shakes as my orgasm races through me.

Blake doesn’t stop licking until I’ve stopped, making it go on forever. He sits up and wipes his mouth with the back of his hand while he watches me pant.

“So fucking beautiful,” he says, getting up from the bed. It’s only now I realise he’s still wearing his jeans. “Got one more in you?” he asks as he drops them and his boxers to the floor. The sight of him naked and hard before me brings my body back to life. I’d have thought my answer to his question would be no but I’m fucking insatiable for him right now.

“I guess you’ll have to find out.”

He’s on me before I have chance to blink. He gets himself between my thighs and wraps my legs around his waist before pushing all the way into me. My back arches and my eyes shut as I try to process the sensation. The last two orgasms have left me so sensitive I feel everything, every glorious inch of him.

“Fuck I’ve missed this,” Blake says as he folds himself over me so he can find my lips. He kisses me with the same tenderness he thrusts into me with, the slow speed driving me insane.

“I need more, Blake,” I complain as I scratch my nails across his back.

He growls and indulges me with what I need. He sits back on his heels, grabs on to the back of my thighs, and lifts me from the bed.

“Oh fuck.”

His thrusts get faster and I take it all as he loses control in front of me. It’s so fucking sexy. Sweat runs down his face as he continues to pound into me.

“Addison, fuck, so good, fuck.”

The feeling of him hitting me deep every time forces my eyes to shut so I can focus on chasing my orgasm.

“Fuck, Adds, I’m gonna—”

“ARGH,” I interrupt as my own orgasm slams into me. Blake follows suit only seconds later. His cock twitches inside me for the longest time before he pulls out and falls in a panting, sweaty mess beside me.

“Fucking hell,” he says as he pulls me to him and shoves his face into my neck.