Chapter Nine
Emma
I throw three days to the dogs…literally. I spend all my time with them, especially Faith. Theo and Otis are therapy dogs, in a way. Mac showed me how they help socialize the other dogs with their interactions. I follow his lead and learn a great deal about training dogs. Faith teaches me a lot, too. Mostly, how to play again.
I have a few conversations with Kenneth and tell him about the dog rescue. I also explain that Aiden is coming with me to Linx. I expect this to spark an argument, but it doesn’t. He says its good I’ll have someone with me. His lack of interest signals something is really wrong with our relationship. If I am being honest, it’s been this way for a while, but I think I’ve gotten so used to wrong that it feels…normal. I’m not going to give up on us, though. We’ll work it out when I move to L.A. Things will return to normal one day. The real normal.
Aiden is still a mystery. He works with the animals when he isn’t eating or exercising. I tell myself he’s not avoiding me, just in his own zone. I’m not really sure why I miss his company so much.
Silly girl.
On the third day, I sit on the back porch. Faith is sleeping by my feet while I read my newest romance. I picked it up when I went grocery shopping with Mac. I have officially inherited my mom’s favorite pleasure, even using her method for choosing a book by closing my eyes before the shelves lined with paperbacks and pointing my finger. No front or back cover, no judgment or guessing. Yeah, I end up with a lot of duds that way, but I also get some amazing surprises. Books I never imagined reading turn out to be my favorites. And this book will probably make the list. I’m forcing myself to slow my pace so I don’t devour it all in one gulp.
Aiden’s shadow falls on me, blocking the sun. “Cooper, I’ve been looking all over for you.”
I lower the book. “You have?”
He twirls my key ring around his finger. “I finished fixing your vehicle.”
“Really? I thought you’d do it when we got back.”
“I had some time. We’re still taking my car, but I figured I should get this done.”
I’m grateful, but also a little sad. It’s obvious he wants me to leave as soon as we get back from the trip. Shaking the feeling away, I give him a smile.
Aiden jerks his head toward the front of the house. “C’mon, I want to show it to you.” The excitement on his face is contagious.
Faith follows us to the garage. Aiden goes to lift the door, but pauses when it’s halfway up.
“Close your eyes, Cooper.”
“Um…okay.” I shut them.
“No peeking.” He comes behind me, leading me in slowly so I won’t trip over anything. I go tense at his touch. He eases back in reaction.
“Open,” he whispers.
I blink a few times, expecting to find my daddy’s truck with a new set of shiny wheels, but instead the whole car is shiny. I walk around it slowly. It gleams from top to bottom, every scratch filled in, every rust stain buffed out.
“It looks brand new.”
“It’s not, but it did get a serious makeover.”
I look inside the window, taking in the sparkling chrome and spotless dashboard. The whiff of new car smell washes over me as soon as I open the door.
“I don’t know what to say. Thank you.”
He leans against it, looking almost relieved by my reaction. “Welcome.”
“Wait, where’s my stuff?” The tarp is gone and the truck bed empty.
He gestures to the corner of the garage. “I had to take it to the carwash. I didn’t want to risk damaging anything.”
I stare at the boxes he’s carefully stacked in the corner of the garage.
“I hope you’re not mad. I figured we’ll be gone for a while and Mac may need to move it at some point. We get some heavy rains around here, and I didn’t think the tarp was enough protection. Your stuff is safe here in the garage.”
I shake my head. “It’s very thoughtful.”
He twirls the keys again. “You want to take her out for a spin? I’ve driven her around here, but I figured a longer drive might be wise so we can fully test the alternator and spark plugs.”
“You put new spark plugs in, too?”
“Just a little tune-up.”
I take a step back. “How much do I owe you?”
“Stop insulting me.”
“Seriously, this is a lot of work. Let me pay you for your time.”
“Cooper, I swear if you bring it up again, I’m gonna rip that alternator out with my bare hands.”
“Okay, I won’t. But I appreciate it more than I’m capable of expressing.”
“So, you up for it?”
“For what?”
He sighs, dragging a hand through his thick, unruly black hair. “A drive.”
“Yeah, sure.” I reach for my keys.
He yanks them back, eyeing me cautiously. “First, you need to go change.”
I look down at my cargo shorts and T-shirt. “Why? Are we going somewhere special?”
“Yeah, someplace I want to show you. But nowhere fancy. Wear loose, comfortable pants and layer yourself. A T-shirt, a sweatshirt, and probably a jacket, too. You have good shoes?”
“Yeah.”
“Sunscreen?”
“I think so.”
“We’ll stop if we need it.”
“Where are we going?”
“It’s a surprise. Second, do you mind if I drive? I can get a better feel for the vehicle that way, and see if there are any other issues.”
I have a feeling the request has more to do with his need for control then anything else, but I agree. There have been many small steps between us, but Aiden is making a giant leap by showing me something special. I want him to leap. Hell, I want to push him into a leap.
“Fine with me.”
“Well, you better get moving. Daylight’s wasting.”
When I come out dressed in my many layers, the truck is pulled to the front of the house with Theo in the back. Aiden runs around to the passenger side and opens the door. I open my mouth to remind him he wanted to drive before I realize he’s opening the door for me.
“Theo’s coming?”
Aiden rubs his coat. “Yeah, Faith is a little too rambunctious for this, but Theo has done it plenty of times.”
“Where are we going?” I ask again.
“Patience, Cooper.”
We drive through Butte Falls proper, passing stores, including the grocery store where I got my novel. We go by a huge waterfall.
“What’s that?” I ask.
“The falls. We are Butte Falls for a reason. We have falls.”
I am disappointed when he doesn’t slow. The falls look breathtaking. He keeps driving until we’re on some desolate road. The street signs become sparse, while the scenery turns vibrant. The forest is dense, with the tallest pine trees I’ve ever seen. Theo and I both hang our heads out the window.
Aiden pulls the car into one of the only paved lots I’ve seen. It edges a huge lake. He walks around to the bed of the truck and pulls out a hiker’s backpack.
“What do you think, Cooper?”
“This is post card beautiful.”
“It is, isn’t it? I come out here whenever I need to focus. I figured we both could use some focus right now.”
I tilt my head, taking in the skyline. “What mountain is that?”
Aiden slings the pack across his broad shoulders. “Depends who you are. The Klamath Indians called it Kesh yainatat, which means, “dwarf old woman who commands the west wing.” Most folks call it Mount McLoughlin, though.”
There was nothing dwarfish about this mountain with its sharp peak poking through the clouds. “Amazing. How long can we stay?”
“Probably a while. I packed us a lunch.”
“You did?”
He slaps his stomach; the sound is hard like a rock flung against cement. “Have you seen me? You think I’m gonna skip a meal?”
I chuckle. “I suppose not.”
“So, here’s the thing, Cooper. We can either enjoy a nice early lunch by this lake, or…”
“Or?”
Aiden’s smile turns mischievous. He jerks his head toward the mountain. “We can climb the dwarf old woman. You choose.”
My eyes go up to the steep, rocky cliffs. I imagine rolling my ankles on the sharp, jagged rocks or falling off the side. It’s huge and scary, but exciting, too. I want to climb. “We better get going, Sheffield. Daylight’s a wasting.”
“Good girl.”
Aiden tells me it will take us seven hours to go up and come down, but we don’t have to go to the summit. Although, I can see he really wants to. I watch my steps carefully. First, we hike, which isn’t so bad, but soon we’re climbing and the air begins to thin as the earth gets farther away. Aiden and Theo are pros, but they are patient with me. Aiden even reaches for my hand on a few of the steep inclines. It’s a pleasant day, a little overcast but not cold. Aiden sheds his sweatshirt, revealing a black T-shirt that shows off his molded frame. I try not to stare at his muscular backside, but he’s right in front of me, leading the way. That view distracts from all the other gorgeousness happening around me.
We are silent as we climb. I like it, though. The lulling sounds of a nearby creek, the fluttering wings of a hundred different birds, the breeze blowing through the trees, and the staccato of rock as it hits more rock make a very pleasing soundtrack.
“How far have we climbed?” I ask.
“A little over five miles.”
I pat myself on the back for making it this far. Seriously, I want to give myself a fucking framed award complete with an obnoxious gold star.
Aiden hands me a bottle of water. “You’re doing great.”
I empty the plastic bottle quickly and wipe my mouth. “Yeah, so are you, Sheffield.”
He smirks. He can probably scale this mountain blindfolded. Still, I’m keeping up and that’s something. Just when I’m feeling like an accomplished mountaineer, two children rush past me with their parents in tow.
I mentally shred the certificate of achievement.
“Should we wait for Grandpa and Nana?” the girls ask.
“No, they’ll be along,” their father answers, smiling toward us in greeting.
Grandpa and Nana?
The kids get even more excited as they spot Theo.
“Can we pet him?” the boy asks.
“Sure,” Aiden says. Theo laps up the attention the kids throw his way before they depart. Aiden shakes his head, a huge grin on his face. “Don’t feel bad, they’ve probably been climbing here since they were kids.”
“They are kids!”
As if to add salt to the wound, Grandpa and Nana offer warm encouragement as they pass us, too.
“You’re doing great, honey,” Nana says as I huff next to her.
I do my best to return her smile, while I’m picturing burning the remnants of my shredded certificate.
Aiden’s grin widens like he’s got a direct line to my thoughts. I punch him in the arm. Ouch. I shake out my hand. What the hell is he built out of? Steel?
“What was that for?” he asks through a muffled laugh.
“It’s not funny. I thought I was climbing Oregon’s Everest, but it turns out this is more like the steep incline on I-5.”
“Relax, Cooper. It isn’t a competition.”
“Well, I’m not a very good competitor if a seven-year-old can beat me.”
“Don’t be so tough on yourself.” He shoulder-bumps me. “That kid was at least nine.”
I want to be mad, but all I can do is laugh. I laugh so hard I almost slip on the rocks. Aiden grips my hand, steadying me.
His face turns serious. “Take it easy. This is no eight-thousander like Everest, but you can still get hurt.”
Once I’m steady, I replay what he said. “You say that like you’ve climbed Everest.”
He’s quiet until we make it up the next incline. “Negative. Never climbed Everest.”
“Yeah, ’cause who does that?”
“Did K2, though.”
I spin around and gape at him. “What?”
“K2. Some people call it Chhogori or Mount Goodwin-Austen.”
“I’ve heard of it. When?”
He shrugs as if it’s no big deal, like people climb up the side of gargantuan mountains every day.
“When my contract expired. I was in the area, and I’d always wanted to summit a major mountain. One of my Marine brothers was setting up the trip. It was my once in a lifetime.”
I saw a special once about mountain climbing and the risks that came with it. “Don’t they call it the Savage Mountain?”
“Some folks do.”
“Where is it again?”
“Pakistan.”
I shiver, feeling a cold that doesn’t exist outside my body.
“You okay, Cooper?”
“I’m just trying to wrap my head around this.”
“Around what?”
I tap my finger against my lips. “Let’s see, you were in the Marines stationed in Afghanistan. You survived the ordeal, so you decide to head to Pakistan, the perfect country for a Marine to vacation.”
“I didn’t exactly flash my military ID or anything.”
I hope my sarcasm shields how much this freaks me out. “Yeah, but let’s explore this further. Then because, you know, you’re looking for a thrill in your otherwise humdrum life, you decide to scale the highest and most dangerous peak in all the world.”
“It’s only the second highest, after Everest. So not that big of a deal.”
I jab a finger against his chest. “Don’t joke. Why would you do it?”
He bends so our faces are inches apart. “I wanted to touch the sky,” he whispers but he might as well be shouting.
I don’t have any words. His choice wasn’t some type of adrenaline kick or ego thing, at least, not all of it. There is something compelling Aiden to take on the most dangerous challenge. No, not a challenge—more of a need to gamble with danger. I want to lock him up in a safe box and throw away the key.
“Such a huge risk.” I meant to say it to myself, but the words came out anyway, part question and part statement.
“If I didn’t know better, I’d say you cared.”
“Well, you don’t know better, because I do care.”
His emerald eyes stare me down. “Don’t trouble yourself worrying about me.”
Oh, it’s trouble, Aiden. I couldn’t stop worrying if I wanted to, and trust me, I really want to. I want to because I know you’re trouble.
We continue, quiet for a long time. I try to swat away the swirling images of him surviving avalanches, hanging off rock cliffs, and enduring freezing temperatures. Who am I to judge him? After all, the most adventurous thing I’ve ever done is to pick out a book at random.
He turns to me after a long stretch of silence. “Are the mosquitoes getting to you? I have repellent.”
“No.” There’s not enough spray in the world to repel the thoughts that are bugging me.
“We didn’t summit or anything,” he confesses, as if that makes the act any less threatening. “We got close, but the weather turned on us. We had to go back.”
“There’s always next time.”
“True.”
I stamp my foot and splay my hands. “What? No. No next time.”
He arches an eyebrow and smirks. “Kitten, I’m worried about your blood pressure. What the hell has got you so worked up?”
“You could have gotten hurt.” Or worse.
I quicken my steps because I don’t want to keep having this conversation. I don’t want to think about how worried I am about his safety, or why it concerns me in the first place, which is probably what he’s wondering, too.
I stop at the shady edge of the mountain and take a deep breath, filling up on the heady scent of fresh pine. Looking down, I gasp at the sight below me. We’ve climbed so high. The trees resemble a dark green shaggy carpet surrounding a sparkling lake. If being on the ground looking up was like living in a postcard, this…this moment is like being in heaven.
“C’mon, Cooper, we’re close to the summit. This here is a summit I can actually make.”
“Aiden, I’m not your dog. Stop commanding me.”
“I’m sorry.”
I feel guilty for snapping at him. Even guiltier because it’s clear he genuinely feels bad. Our little banter has piqued something dark in him. I’m responsible for the look on his face. I want to forget it all and bring back the playful Aiden of fifteen minutes ago. “Will you come here and share a moment with me?”
He strolls over and glances at the sight below us. “It’s pretty.”
“Pretty? I think it’s the most beautiful thing I’ve ever seen.”
He’s quiet for a while, taking it in, just as I am. “Not the most beautiful. Maybe second place.” His voice is so low I have to strain to hear him.
“Yeah, I’m sure the view from K2 was stunning.”
“Sure, Emma,” he says, his eyes boring into me as if I’ve gotten it all wrong.
“Let’s take a break and eat lunch here.”
“Deal.”
He pulls a blanket from his pack and lays it on the ground for us to sit. Aiden sets Theo up with a plastic bowl of kibble then takes out sandwiches from a small blue cooler.
I survey the contents of my sandwich. “Peanut butter and jelly, huh?”
Aiden smiles. “It’s not gourmet, but it’s my favorite, and I was jonesing for something sweet.”
“It’s my favorite, too.”
“You’re kidding.”
I hold up my sandwich. “No, and it’s adorable how you cut the crusts.”
“I take my sandwich making very seriously.”
“I’m just surprised this is what you made. I figured a guy like you would go for something more…adventurous.”
“Such as?”
“Poisonous eel on whole wheat with a smear of jellyfish or something.”
He cracks up. “Well, I would have, except I couldn’t find all the ingredients at the grocery store.”
“What? No eel in Butte Falls?”
“Oh no, we have a fine selection of eel. It’s the whole wheat bread I was having trouble with. Eel just doesn’t taste right on any other kind.”
Pretty soon our laughter echoes.
“I’ll give it to you. Your sassy mouth is something I’m never going to get used to. Most girls wet their panties when I tell them about my adventures.”
“Seriously, why did you do it?”
“George Mallory was one of the first to attempt Everest. You know what he said when they asked him why he did it?”
“He wanted to get laid?”
“Funny, smart-ass. He said because it was there. I have the same answer. I climb mountains because they exist for me to climb.”
“There are other mountains?”
“Cooper, you don’t run before you crawl and you sure as hell don’t make an attempt on Karakoram without practice. I did Mount Rainier, Shasta, and Denali first. I even did Mount Haleakala in Hawaii. Every time I got leave, I picked a mountain to conquer.”
He spent all his leave climbing mountains? I respect his athleticism, but there has to be another reason he chose this particular sport. Why didn’t he go home to people who loved him?
The answer comes to me, sudden and sharp. He had no one to go home to.
“So the girls climb you when you tell them you climbed these mountains?”
He presses his mouth tight, perhaps to quell the twitch of his lips. “Something like that. Tell me, you always blush this much?”
“I’m not blushing.”
“Your cheeks are as pink as Pepto-Bismol.”
“With lines like that, it’s no wonder the girls are always throwing themselves at you. They probably can’t resist your Casanova ways.”
“That’s what I like about you, Cooper. You keep me humble.”
“I’m sorry about my reaction before. It’s a huge accomplishment. I’m actually in awe of it. It’s just hard for me to get why you’d want to tempt fate.”
“Conquering mountains and tempting fate is not the same thing. I’m not afraid of getting hurt.”
Didn’t he get it? That statement there is exactly why I’m freaking out. Really, I shouldn’t care this much. Maybe it’s all the emotion of losing the two people I love most in the world, and I’m projecting onto him. That’s gotta be it, right?
I keep staring at the panoramic view. It calms me. I try to soak it up and memorize every perfect pixel.
Aiden’s deep voice pierces through my thin veil of comfort. “I’ve never noticed how peaceful this spot is.”
“You’ve never checked out this area in all the times you’ve hiked here?” I ask, plucking a few grapes from the plastic container he packed.
“Can’t say I have, but I’m happy you made me stop. Sometimes I’m too driven to finish something to enjoy all the in-betweens.” He gestures toward the view. “This is a pretty damn nice in-between.”
“I’m grateful for this day. Thank you for making me climb, Aiden.”
“Thank you for making me stop, Cooper.”