Gabe closed the door and stared at the dark apartment. Two weeks had passed since their trip to the hot springs. Cam hadn’t come home once since that weekend, his job keeping him working all the hours that God made in Singapore as his team raced to close a major deal. Gabe suspected that Cam was probably thankful for the distraction. Although they’d spent the rest of that weekend at the inn making love, Gabe knew the words he had spoken that first night had created a distance between them. Gabe had seen it deep in the gunmetal eyes watching him whenever Cam thought he wasn’t looking, a pensive, preoccupied look that spoke of a man wrestling with his inner demons.

Gabe sighed, dropped his bag on an armchair, and headed into the state-of-the-art kitchen. He grabbed a beer from the fridge and popped the cap before taking a swig of the amber liquid, his mind brimming with the thousand and one thoughts that had filled his every waking moment for the past weeks.

Gabe knew that Cam loved him. Cam expressed it every time they kissed, every time they touched, every time he thrust his powerful body into Gabe’s. Gabe was also conscious of the fact that Cam would probably never tell him the three words he most wanted to hear.

Although Gabe was grateful for their current relationship, his growing hunger for Cam meant he wanted his everything. His body, his mind, his soul. And his heart.

Gabe wanted those three little words.

Craved them like a thirsty man longing for a single drop of water.

But Cam was not a man who could easily give himself to anyone. Not while the scars of his past remained so fresh.

It was in the third month of their relationship that Cam had finally opened up to Gabe about his childhood. As Gabe cradled Cam’s head to his chest where they lay together in bed and listened to his horrific confessions, his heart had broken for the ten-year-old boy who had walked in on his mother while she was in her final death throes from a drug overdose. Though Gabe’s own relationship with his parents had become strained after he came out of the closet while he was in college, at least they were still alive.

Cam had spoken of his harrowing time in the various institutions where he’d spent his early teens until he met Joe Cavendish, his best friend and the owner of Saron, the club where Gabe and Cam had met. Despite the emotion choking his throat, Gabe had chuckled at the two teenagers’ various escapades as they had grown up, always there for one another and watching each other’s backs.

Gabe’s fingers had clenched in Cam’s hair when he told him of the night he and Joe had finally run away from the children’s home at age fifteen. It had been a stupid, brave, inane, and life-changing act—one that had sent their futures spiraling in vastly different directions and landed them in careers they could never have anticipated in a million years.

Though they’d tried to keep in touch, fate had torn the two friends apart and they’d spent the next few years treading different paths in the same city, neither realizing they were living just a few miles from the other. While Cam had worked all hours in several manual jobs and often went without food while he studied for his SATs in public libraries, Joe had been lured into the sex and strip club scene, his tall, alluring physique making him out to be older than he looked.

That they had found each other again twenty years later, in a country on the other side of the world, was a miracle both men had welcomed. Yet, despite their rekindled friendship and the fact that they were both wealthy and successful beyond their wildest dreams, the pair had struggled to let go of the darkness that still clouded their hearts.

It had taken nearly losing the man he loved at the hands of a vicious stalker for Joe Cavendish to finally overcome his demons and admit his feelings for Ethan Skye, one of the bartenders at Saron and Gabe’s closest friend in the city. That Ethan had harbored shocking secrets of his own had stunned all of them when they were accidentally revealed by a mutual friend nearly a year ago. Ethan’s deliberate, yet justifiable deception, would have jeopardized the two men’s burgeoning relationship had Joe not utterly and completely fallen for Ethan. The way they now openly loved and teased one another sometimes sent a pang of envy through Gabe.

He flicked on the lights as he walked through the apartment, his gaze sweeping the empty space. Though more than half a year had passed since he moved into Cam’s place and made it his home, Gabe could still see and feel his lover everywhere he looked—from the sleek lines of expensive furniture and the masculine decor, to Cam’s belongings scattered here and there.

Gabe showered, ate dinner, and went to bed. His cell had remained silent that day, Cam evidently too busy to respond to the text Gabe had sent at lunchtime. Gabe placed the phone on the nightstand and pulled the covers back. Heat flooded his cheeks when he saw the shirt lying on the sheets.

It was one of Cam’s.

Gabe climbed in the bed and settled on his back before reaching for the garment. He blushed and buried his face in it, inhaling the scent of the man he loved.

Like all the nights since he’d last seen Cam, Gabe reached down and touched his aching cock, one hand wrapping around his hardening shaft and setting a slow, punishing rhythm while he imagined Cam touching him.

A moan left Gabe’s throat as he dipped his hand lower and touched his hole, his index finger slick with his pre-cum. He bit his lip and squeezed tightly, like Cam had taught him, before opening himself to his touch. He ran the pad of his finger around his sensitive rim and plunged deep inside, a second finger quickly joining the first one.

Tension wound through Gabe as he rubbed his cock and finger-fucked himself, his ass lifting off the pillow as he bowed his back. His orgasm came too fast, his hips flexing up toward the ceiling, his ass clenching around his fingers while he pumped cum out into his hand, his labored grunts echoing around the room. Though his climax had his toes curling in the sheets, it wasn’t enough.

Gabe closed his eyes and shuddered, an ache building deep inside him. Only Cam could give him the pleasure his body craved and the gratification his heart and soul sought.

* * *

Cam dropped into the hotel chair and closed his eyes. It was past midnight in Singapore and he’d just finished at the office. He fished his cell out of his pocket and hesitated as he stared at Gabe’s message.

The words Gabe had spoken in the aftermath of their lovemaking a fortnight ago at the hot springs still haunted Cam. His confession had sent a chill through Cam’s bones that had only grown in the time they’d been apart, a thorn that twisted and stabbed at his cold heart.

Even though he cared deeply for Gabe, Cam didn’t think he could give him what he wanted. A fully loving, committed relationship. And Gabe deserved that more than anyone Cam knew—deserved to be happy, deserved to be cherished like the precious gift that he was.

Deep down inside, Cam knew there might be a time when he would be forced to let Gabe go. Cam didn’t know if he would be selfless enough to do that though, when that time came. Didn’t think he could easily give Gabe to another man. Didn’t think he could relinquish the possessive feelings he harbored for him despite the fact that he couldn’t return Gabe’s love.

Cam groaned and dropped his face in his hands. He wanted nothing more right now than to forget the storm of conflicting emotions raging through his heart and mind. And he knew of only one way to do this.

He wanted to see Gabe. To kiss him. To touch him. To take him. To watch him come beneath him, body impaled by Cam’s cock, hole clenching and sucking Cam deeper into his body, fingers and heels digging into Cam’s flesh while he arched and cried out in pleasure.

Cam felt his dick stiffen behind his zipper. He stumbled to the shower, stripped, and jerked off twice under the steaming water, the image of Gabe’s climaxing face imprinted on his inner vision as he stroked himself to his own shuddering orgasms.