Chapter 23

 

In her parents’ driveway, Gabby turned in the passenger seat and blinked, looking about as happy to be here as Flynn. “We don’t have to go inside.”

He offered a crooked grin and looked out the windshield at the Cosette’s brick ranch lined with neatly trimmed bushes. He’d been to her folks’ house a million times, but this was different. This time, he was dating their daughter.

After word had gotten out they were officially a couple—in Battleaxe record time of about thirty seconds—her mother had insisted they come over for dinner. With Cade and Avery’s rehearsal tomorrow, coupled with what had happened with Hailey earlier in the week, plus the job stress he wasn’t used to as of late, this dinner was just one more thing determined to drive him batshit.

He sighed and fidgeted behind the wheel.

Screw it. He was with Gabby now and wanted to keep it that way. He needed to grow a pair and just open the car door. Her parents were nice people, had always treated him kindly, but again...he hadn’t been dating her those other instances. Not to mention, Gabby’s evil sister would, no doubt, be inside. He wouldn’t shed a tear if he never crossed paths with Rachel again. He could take the crap she dished out to him, but he would not tolerate the way she often treated Gabby.

She waved her hand to get his attention. “They already love you, you know.”

Yep. As her best friend, they loved him just fine. Except he had the sinking suspicion that was about to veer way south.

Smiling when he felt like yakking, he kissed her forehead and attempted to shove the foreboding sense of dread back into its cage. “Let’s go.”

The scent of roasted chicken filled the house as they stepped inside. Her father was doing a crossword puzzle in front of the TV, but set it aside to hug his daughter. He smiled at Flynn and shook his hand. “How have things been with you?”

“Good, thank you.”

Gabby translated and glanced around. “Mom in the kitchen?”

Her father nodded and gestured for Flynn to take a seat.

She headed out of the room and Flynn hesitantly eased into a recliner, staring at the dark brown shag carpet, then the flower-printed furniture. He never noticed they matched the drapes. Aside from the neutral beige walls, the room was raging femininity.

The Cosette house always looked like a crochet party had thrown up on every available surface. Gabby’s mother had been a stay-at-home mom, and ever since the girls were old enough to move out, she’d filled in that time with knitting. Doilies. Afghans. Picture frames. Seat covers. A creepy-looking doll.

Craft hell.

Photos of the girls lined the mantel, and from his chair, he zeroed in on one in particular—him and Gabby from senior prom. Last time he’d been here, her cheerleader shot had been in that frame. He didn’t know what to make of it, wondering if the change was some kind of silent support of their relationship or appeasing it.

Without Gabby around to translate, her father had gone back to the crossword puzzle. Unlike Flynn’s family and friends, the Cosettes never showed interest in learning sign language. Maybe Hailey had been onto something with getting him to speak the other night. It wasn’t like he was a clumsy five-year-old anymore. He might feel awkward talking, but it couldn’t be more uncomfortable than sitting here twiddling his thumbs.

“You want me to change the channel?”

Flynn lifted his hand and shook his head with a smile that bordered on plastic. To prove it, he focused on the set and pretended the fishing program was interesting. The only thing that rated more tedious than going fishing was watching it. He subtly checked his watch. Christ. It had only been five minutes since they’d arrived.

Bless her sweet, perfect, gigantic heart, Gabby came back with a beer for him and sat on the arm of Flynn’s chair.

“What’s a seven letter word for fatigued?”

“Haggard.”

Gabby translated, and her dad pointed at him. “You’re a keeper.”

Yay him. Flynn strummed his fingers on his thigh and got lost in thought. He stared at Gabby’s profile while she watched TV. She was the spitting image of her mom with her fair skin and blond hair, but she’d inherited the curves from her dad. Flynn had no clue where the baby blues had come from as both her folks had brown eyes. She also had her mother’s hospitality in spades and her father’s calm, reserved presence.

It had him wondering where the hell Rachel had gone wrong.

Tick-tock.

After a hundred years, Mr. Cosette set the crossword aside. “So, I hear you two are an item.”

Flynn deflected to Gabby, who smiled. “Yes, for a few weeks now.”

“Kind of surprised it took you this long. You two have been joined at the hip since kindergarten.”

“Flynn’s a little slow on the uptake.” She nudged Flynn’s shoulder and winked at him, her smile the epitome of adorable.

He narrowed his eyes in good humor. “Such a comedian.”

They talked about his brother’s upcoming wedding and mundane crap like the weather until her mother poked her head through the doorway to announce dinner.

Flynn followed Gabby into the kitchen and paused when he found Rachel at the table. Since he hadn’t spotted her before now, he’d been hoping she’d not been able to come. She squinted at him with a sneer, and he bit back a sigh.

At least dinner smelled good. Mrs. Cosette had always been a great cook. Roasted chicken, baby carrots, biscuits, and mashed potatoes lined the table. He took a seat next to Gabby and across from her wretch of a sister.

Dishes got passed. Conversation started. Stink eye from Rachel abounded.

Great times.

Mrs. Cosette wiped her mouth with a napkin. “Flynn, are you going to give a toast at Cade’s wedding?”

She was probably just issuing polite chat, but he got the sense he was being baited. “I’m not sure. Probably.” He glanced at Gabby. She’d helped him get more comfortable with the idea of dancing, but a toast hadn’t much crossed his mind. She’d have to translate if he did do one. Or maybe Drake. Cade never mentioned a speech preference.

Rachel rolled her eyes and whipped Gabby’s mom an I told you so look. Pretty sure he didn’t want to know what that was about, he focused on his plate.

He was a quarter-way through his meal when he noticed Gabby had barely made a dent. She’d been too busy translating everything to pick up her fork. By her mother’s expression, she hadn’t missed the fact either.

Flynn tapped Gabby’s thigh. “Just eat, sweetheart. I’m good. I’ll follow fine.”

She gave him an are you sure look, and he nodded. When she started eating, he dug back in and did the same.

From what he could tell, none of the conversation involved him and they were all talking too fast for him to keep up very well. Something about Rachel and her apartment and her job or whatever. Tuning them out, he focused on his plate and forced himself to swallow food he didn’t taste, even though his appetite had taken a hike.

This sort of felt like elementary school all over again. Him left out of the mix, only being included because of the pretty blonde next to him.

What the hell? Could he be a whinier bitch right now? She had a right to enjoy her meal, to spend time with her family.

After he finished, he sat back and draped an arm over the back of Gabby’s chair, idly running his fingers through the ends of her hair to calm himself and adjust his mood. He glanced around the kitchen for something to do. Bare oak cabinets, white countertops, black appliances. Nothing much to see. They had an apple-print wallpaper design which he stared at hard enough to have the fruit blend together.

He suddenly got a glimpse into his future if he and Gabby stayed together, and it made his stomach burn. Holidays and birthday parties and family picnics. Her sitting on the floor, translating every word, trying her damnedest to make sure he was a part of things. Constantly looking his way to be sure he was okay.

She set her fork aside and smiled at him. His Gabby, the sweetest damn person on the planet. “Mom wants to know if you’d like dessert?”

He forced his gaze off her and onto her mom. “No, thank you. I’m stuffed. Dinner was delicious.”

Mrs. Cosette stood, gathering plates. “I’ll send some home with you. You can eat it later?”

“Thank you.”

Rachel must’ve said something snotty because Gabby whipped her a steely glare. Then she rose to help her mom with dishes.

Before she could get too far, he kissed her cheek. “I’ll be in the living room with your dad. Need anything?”

She wrapped her arms around his waist and pecked his mouth with a quick kiss. “We can take off soon.”

There was a God. He nodded and occupied some time helping her dad with a crossword. Mr. Cosette would point at a hint he couldn’t solve. Flynn would fill in the spaces. Thirty minutes passed, and Gabby hadn’t returned. He made a stop at the bathroom and then hunted her down in the kitchen.

She stood in a circle with Rachel and her mom, her back to him. Her shoulders were tense and her hands fisted on her hips. He stopped in the doorway, wondering what was going on, his stomach twisting in concern.

Rachel flung her hand in the air, drawing his attention to her. “Do you really want to date a deaf guy?”

He froze, his muscles going rigid to the point of pain. They were discussing him? Rachel talked too fast to read her lips for the rest of her statement. Her mother seemed to be following up that declaration, anyway.

“Are you really happy, though?”

At that second, Rachel glanced up and a wicked gleam lit her evil incarnate eyes.

Gabby whirled, saw him, and closed her eyes. Regret pinched her brows. She rubbed her forehead before her apology-laden gaze met his. “Hey. Are you about ready to head home?”

With his stomach bottomed out and his throat in a vise, he scanned the faces and resettled on her. And here he thought things were going well. Too well, he’d told Drake. He should’ve known something was coming to ruin their happy. In fact, he’d been sure of it. Their relationship had been almost too good to be true.

Regardless, it didn’t matter what her family thought of them together. Gabby was the only one who got a say in this, the only one who mattered.

Instead of making it easy on them, he confronted the issue. “Is there a problem?”

Gabby crossed her arms, refusing to sign, her head cast down. For all her sweet bravery, she gazed at the floor as if hoping it would swallow her whole. Embarrassment tinged her cheeks.

Fine. He repeated the question out loud.

Mrs. Cosette’s head whipped back, her eyes round, obviously not expecting him to speak. She glanced at Gabby and back to him. Her shoulders dropped, posture deflating. “We like you, Flynn. You’ve always been a good friend to our girl. Yet...” She glanced up, seeming to collect herself. “It was one thing when you were young and she did things for you, but she’s wasted her whole life making yours easier. Now, to have you start dating, is too much.”

Gabby stepped forward, her hands flying in rapid sign, but he kept his gaze on her mother. The edges of his vision started to gray, spots dancing before his eyes. He was pretty certain he’d stopped breathing, but his thoughts were too jacked up to figure it out.

Mrs. Cosette addressed her daughter. “You could have been anything, done anything you wanted. Did you even have a desire to be a veterinarian technician or did you simply follow him?” She faced Flynn, stark pity in her eyes. “I know you care about her, but when does she start getting to live her life?”

He swiped a hand down his face and looked away, not needing to read any more. He got the picture. Worst part? She wasn’t wrong. Not completely. Her words had hit a nerve because he’d had the same apprehension himself. More than once.

He fisted his shaking hands, trying to wrap his head around the facts, but it was a moot effort. Raw pain tore at his chest, stealing his breath. He couldn’t latch onto a tangible thought to save his life.

Gabby stepped in front of him, signing so fast air whooshed between them.

Not reading any of it, he stilled her hands with his own. Now was not the time for this, here not the place. Later, when they were alone, they’d hash this out, find out if there was any validity to what her mother said. He’d like to know the answer to that himself.

He forced a swallow past the rock in his throat and dropped her hands. “I think it’s best I leave.”

“I’m coming with you—”

Shaking his head, he cupped her cheeks. With his heart hammering, he pressed a kiss to her forehead and stepped away. “I’ll see you tomorrow.” He left her standing in her mother’s kitchen with wounded eyes and her lower lip quivering, feeling like an asshole.

How he got home was a mystery, as was how he wound up sitting on his back deck with his dog at his feet and stars winking overhead. A numb state of shock threatened, and it was all he could do to hold onto reality a little longer. Oblivion beckoned, but he couldn’t give in.

Gulping air, he let the breeze wash over his chilled skin and wondered if he’d ever be warm again. Dropping his head in his hands, he fought the tears burning behind his lids and replayed the I-told-you-so rhetoric for good measure.

Because shit...he had known. He’d known in high school when he’d shut down his attraction to Gabby and he’d known a month ago when it flared back to life. Yeah, they had something great going. And yeah, there was a lot more than basic desire at play here. There were emotions. Strong, consuming emotions. The forever kind.

But what was at the root of them? Even with all the miles and years accumulated between him and Gabby, he knew his answer. Yet hers wasn’t clear. And that was the gutting, eviscerating part. He’d trust Gabby with his life if it came down to that. But in this, when it came to his heart, if he wasn’t one-hundred percent certain her feelings weren’t misguided, they would be doing both themselves a great injustice by staying together.

The wooden deck planks vibrated and, without glancing up, he knew it was Gabby. Damn her, anyway. Fletch brushed by, scrambling to greet to her.

“I said I’d see you tomorrow,” he mumbled without looking at her. Keeping his head buried in his hands, he prayed she’d go home.

Cool fingers closed around his wrists and pulled his arms down.

He sighed, meeting her gaze. He’d been looking into those blue eyes so long and so often he wasn’t even sure they were two separate people anymore. Moonlight bathed her fair skin, illuminated the loose strands of her hair as if creating a halo. How fitting, since she was an angel. Cherubic face, huge eyes, long lashes, and curvy body. Ability to make anyone comfortable in her presence, give unconditionally, and empathize with any creature who emitted a heartbeat. Girl next door to the world, yet a seductive temptress in the bedroom.

“I’m sorry you overheard that conversation. Mom meant well, but she doesn’t know what she’s talking about.” She gripped his forearms, squeezing. “She was wrong.”

Leave it to her to ignore him.

He did not want to do this tonight. He felt too unguarded and raw to be civilized. Much needed to be hashed out and, since she was here, he started with the least invasive. “You need to think about what your mom said. If there had been no me in the picture, if we’d never been friends, would you have wanted to be a technician?”

A helpless gesture of her hands fluttered the space between them and she pinned him with a frustrated narrowing of her eyes. “I don’t know, Flynn. I wanted to be Rock Star Barbie and an Olympic gymnast, too, but I can’t sing and I’d kill myself on a balance beam.”

He growled, rose from the chair, and stalked the length of the deck. Strain wrenched his muscles until he was brittle with irritation.

She rounded him and planted her feet, stopping him mid-pace. “The point is, you do exist and we are friends. The rest doesn’t matter.”

“Of course, it matters!”

“Why, Flynn? The people in our lives shape us. We grow with them. Taking you out of the equation is like removing a limb. It’s impossible to know the result. The outcome is, I’m happy.”

He rubbed the back of his neck. “And what about the rest of it? The years wasted in an attempt to make my life easier?” He never saw it that way, or maybe never considered the option, but did others? Like her family apparently had? Yeah, she made his life easier, but it wasn’t as if he couldn’t do things by himself. And she had a life of her own, her own interests outside of him.

Her typically affectionate eyes morphed to blue ice. “Are you kidding me right now? Not one minute of the time I spent with you was wasted.” Tears brimmed her lashes and she shook her head like she didn’t comprehend. “I love you.”

There went all the air. Hell, this hurt. Like ripping apart organs kind of pain. “I may be deaf, but that big heart of yours might be blinding you.”

She stared at him, gaze steady, tears trekking her cheeks. “I would love you if you weren’t deaf. I’d love you if you were blind. I’d love you if you had all your senses or none at all.”

She angrily wiped her tears with her palm, and he had to clench his fingers in order not to do it himself. “You were the first person to see me, a scared little girl in a classroom full of strangers. And all these years later, you’re still the only man who does. You’re funny and kind and courageous.”

He believed her. She could tell him Elvis was living in sin with Little Orphan Annie on the island of Atlantis and he’d believe her. Trust wasn’t the problem.

She wasn’t alone in her feelings. He’d fallen so hard, he hadn’t even realized he’d smacked pavement until he was in fragmented pieces. And he loved her too much not to let her go, just for a little while. Long enough to give her time. The only way to be certain she’d really dissected the grating issue was for him to not be right in front of her.

He’d never been an insecure person. Lonely on the outside looking in, often irritated by being disregarded, sad to be different from his peers, sometimes hurt to be laughed at behind his back...but not insecure. His family and friends were loving and encouraging. He had a great support system. But lately, ever since he’d gone all in with Gabby and succumbed, he’d been a twisted ball of self-doubting, unsure, confused chaos.

It wasn’t like him and he hated it. Not that it was her fault, because it wasn’t. Perhaps he just wasn’t cut out for a long-term relationship, even though that’s what he’d secretly desired. For too long, he’d craved that connection to another person. He had that with Gabby, but they weren’t the only two people to consider. Her family meant a lot to her. And the last thing he wanted was for her to wake up one day and resent him. For settling. For not venturing out. For inadvertently trapping her.

Letting out a deliberate breath, he took in her features, his beautiful Gabby, and begged for strength from any higher power that would listen. “We’ve spent too many years knotted together to see the bigger picture. I’m not saying this is the end or that we’re over, just that we need some space.”

Slowly, her features slackened, her eyes pitting to a void of nothing. Like putting on a shell of armor to protect herself. And how ironic. The one person she never needed protection from was him. Her chest rose and fell in rapid succession and, eventually, she squared her shoulders.

She leveled him with a penetrating stare that obliterated anything in her path and shot right to his soul. “There’s something you don’t understand, that I fear you’ll never understand. We all have our handicaps, Flynn. You’re not mine.”