Past
AS SOON AS the door closed behind me, I knew. This was it. This was what I wanted.
I slowly turned around, finding Butcher leaning against the door. His jaw was clenched tight. His back was stiff. He was huge. Much larger than I remembered but everything inside of me wanted him.
“Tell me why the fuck I keep hearing that you’ve slept with every fucker I know,” Butcher demanded, clicking the lock into place.
I leaned against my dresser, crossing my arms under my chest and lifted my chin defiantly. Excitement rushed through me that I finally got to him.
“Tell me why it’s only taken me spreading a rumor about myself for you to notice me.” Although Butcher was much larger than I, he didn’t scare me.
“Little girl, I’ll have you fucking know—”
“No.” I pushed off the dresser and took a step toward him. “I want you. I’ve wanted you since the moment I met you, but you were too fucking stubborn to see it. So, why now, John? Tell me that.”
“No one calls me by my first name,” he bit out, his brows narrowing.
“Do I look like everyone else?”
“No.” His eyes raked down the length of me. “You definitely don’t look like everyone else.”
“Tell me what you’re going to do about it then.” I took a couple more steps toward him until I stood only an inch away. Breathing deep, I inhaled the spice of his cologne mixed with the leather of his vest.
“You don’t want me, Trixie girl,” he said, his voice becoming even deeper as the seconds rolled by between us.
“I do.” I glanced up at him. “And I can tell by that delicious lump in your jeans that you feel the same way.”
Butcher leaned forward, brushing his nose down the length of my jaw. “You think you know me. You think you can heal me. Put my shattered pieces back together again?”
“No. I just want you to fuck me and then we can go from there. I’m not needy. And I’m definitely not clingy.” I tilted my head back. “So, what will it be, John?” I licked my lips, grazing my hands down his chest. “You going to spend the night where your cock wants to be or are you going to be a pussy and leave?”
“Fuck, woman.” He fisted my hair, pulling my head back in a rough move. “You always say what’s on your mind?”
“Yes.” My chest rose and fell with ragged breaths, my need for this man growing even more as time went on. “Life’s too short.”
“Ain’t that the truth, beautiful.”
When his mouth crushed against mine, I knew this was where I was meant to be. Where both of us were meant to be.
(Butcher)
Several years later
“I love you, Trixie girl. I love you with everything inside of me and more. I have no idea how I’ll get through life without you at my side. We were supposed to be in this as one. Together. You and me against the world and all that shit. But now you’re gone and I … I can’t …” My chest tightened. I couldn’t do it. How the hell was I supposed to move on?
“You don’t have to.”
My head snapped up, finding Tray, Greyson, and Catch standing a few feet away.
“What are you doing here?” I asked, my voice rough.
Catch moved first and knelt at my side. He didn’t say anything and instead just wrapped his arm around my shoulders.
Tray moved to my other side, mirroring Catch’s pose while Greyson knelt beside Tray.
“We’re here for you,” Grey said gently.
“That’s it.” Catch grabbed my hand, squeezing it tight in his.
Under normal circumstances, I would have pulled away but this … I needed this. I needed them.
I thanked God up above that I had these men in my life even though I didn’t see them often anymore.
“We love you.” Tray cupped my nape. “Whatever you need, however long you need it for, it’s yours.”
Tears rolled freely down my cheeks. I didn’t even try to brush them away that time. I didn’t know what to do or what to say so I just knelt there and prayed. I prayed that I could find the strength to get through this. I prayed that I could be there for my boys without falling within. I prayed I could move on.
You got this, baby.
Trixie’s voice sounded in my head, shedding a bit of light on the darkness in my life.
I took a breath and then another. I would do this. I could do this.
Even though Trixie was no longer by my side physically, she would always be in my heart.
THE END