It’s time. Probably more than time, but I had to be sure they’d all be sorted without me. And, really, what better way than to just go? No fussing about, no decisions for them to have to make.

It’s grand.

I can’t say that I ever intended to find a new family when I came to the States. I mourned the loss of my Moira and sons. I’d buried them, left Ireland, and merely hoped to find a new sort of normal here for myself.

Honestly, I don’t even know how I started amassing these people I’m leaving behind. My pub grew faster than I’d planned, and a friend knew of a lad who needed a hand—a job, a place to live. And, before I knew it, the McBride’s boys were born. I never considered that I’d be granted a heart full of love again. I’d thought that was taken from me forever when Moira was struck and killed in the street. She’d taken our twin boys to visit her sister in Belfast, and I’ll pray until my dying breath—this last breath—that the bomb blast took them so quickly that they didn’t suffer.

The troubles were not something I could get involved in, so I left. I buried what was left of my heart and boarded a plane, half-hoping that it would crash into the ocean, ending my pain. The other half of me wanted to honor their memory by doing some kind of good. When my plane touched down, I had my answer, and I just took each day in turn.

Moved forward, hoped and prayed that I could somehow do them service. Make them proud.

As each lad that came to me passed through the pub, helping out until they found their way, my heart eased just a bit. It wasn’t until Finn showed up at my doorstep with his own set of troubles he was running from that things changed. That lad needed more than just a job; he needed a family.

Then, Lissy and Gracyn found their way into my pub and my heart, and against everything that made sense, I was stepping in more and more. Offering advice, a shoulder to cry on, a pat on the back, and a soft place to land.

Those three—Finn, Lis, and Gracyn—became the children I hadn’t gotten to raise. They allowed me to be the father I’d only dreamed of being.

Knowing that each of them has found their way with a person worthy of their love grants me the peace to let go.

Aidan will honor and care for Lissy, giving her the support she needs and the love that she deserves. I hate that I’ll miss their wedding, seeing their wee ones and holding them in my arms. That hurts more than the cancer ever has.

Finn—thank the good Lord he has Addie to keep him in line. I did more than my share of worrying about that boy, but, for the love of God, I wasn’t sure he’d ever find his stride. Now, with the way he’s stepped up in the pub, taking charge but finding that balance between work and his woman, I have no fear that he’ll do the pub justice, run it well, and carry on with helping those who need it. He’ll make me proud. He can’t help but to do so.

Gracyn though. The girl who, by all appearances, had everything is the one who struggled the most. God love that girl and her stoic heart, always trying to be what others thought she should be. She fought a battle that not many could ever see, one that not many could ever appreciate. She’s not only found love, but she’s also found the one man capable of helping her to see what she can do if only she grants herself the opportunity. See all the things she has to offer the world, if she allows herself to.

Two weeks is not a lot of time, nothing in the grand scheme of things, and one might say it’s hardly enough time to get to know a person, but I watched. I saw the way her Gavin treated her, the love, the reverence. The no-shite adoration that he didn’t even try to hide from the world. That man loves Gracyn freely and fiercely, and tonight, before I came back to the office for some much-needed quiet, I watched again as she showed the same for him.

Fierce.

Free.

Honest love that will withstand the test of time.

Christ, they’ve already weathered more than most couples, and as long as they have each other, they’ll find the chords, the lyrics, the tunes that make a symphony of music.

My kids are grand. They have what they need, the love they deserve. They have each other, and they won’t be alone.

My final task was seeing them all sorted and now it’s done. They will cry some tears, hopefully lift a parting glass, but not a one of them needs to be burdened by my passing.

The sun will shine on them, and I’ll be with them all the way.