Chapter 15
Diane
Did I run? Stay? I knew I was trapped, but damn if I didn’t want to attempt to try. The only reason I was still standing by the bed was the curiosity to see if I was wrong about his good side. After Jaime’s story, I couldn’t help but think that Master had something to do with him changing his mind about suicide. It had to be because of him. It was too coincidental that we’d both be linked to this man by pure chance. Sure, he worked for him, but Jaime had delivered me here. Knew all about the set up. Maybe he had an appreciation for being where I’d been and believed in a person’s right to choose. Or maybe Master wasn’t killing or letting people die, after all. Could that be it?
Black silk ties swayed at his graceful movement. For a man ready to inflict pain, there was such powerful elegance in his strides. It was almost enough to make the fear dissipate. Almost. I didn’t like the knife he held. I’d yet to adjust to the first branding, I couldn’t have him repeating the process.
“Hands above your head.”
The order was full of authority. Although my body obeyed, my brain revolted. “You do not have permission to cut me again.”
Master’s eyebrow rose, but his advance didn’t falter. Silk weaved around my wrists as he leaned into my body, fastening me to the intricate lines of twisted metal. The hint of his cologne had my lids lowering the slightest amount. The good. I didn’t think as I eased forward, brushing my lips against his rough cheek. He pulled back, the composed façade falling as his eyes searched mine.
“Do I get the kiss now?” Fuck if my voice didn’t sound husky. Deep and seductive with my invitation. Would it work on him? I’d broken through a little. It was worth a try.
Pressure tightened on my wrists as he jerked the ties even tighter. “I told you no. You don’t listen very well. And, for your information, if I want to cut you again, I will. You ordering me not to isn’t going to benefit you one bit. You’re going to learn that I make the rules here. You follow them and bear through whatever it is I have planned for you. If you don’t, you may never leave.”
“I thought you weren’t going to let me anyway.”
If I could have taken it back, I would have. With the escape of my declaration came an unleashing of the monster I’d come to know. The blue of his eyes darkened while his hand latched around my throat, pushing me into the flat post behind me.
“Do you want to stay here, slave? Be my cut-up, scarred, little whore for the rest of your days? Is that what this is about? Can you take the beatings I hold back from putting you through? I don’t think so. I’d kill you, eventually, and I’d do it with more pleasure than you’d know.” His lips curled back as he gripped tighter, moving in closer so his eyes were level with mine. “Kiss you, you say. You want my kiss? So be it.” The hand on my throat pulled me forward and his lips brutally crushed into mine, grinding the insides against my teeth. Blood refreshed from my previous wound nearly making me gag from the metallic flavor. My arms jerked wildly at the ties as my legs tried to run with nowhere to go. Air came in an explosion to my lungs as his hand traveled to clutch under my chin.
“Mmm.” The tip of his tongue swept over the cut while he sucked my bottom lip into his mouth, causing pain to flare into what felt like a million stinging needles piercing my skin. “So sweet. So fucking good, slave.” His fingers pushed into my cheek until I was crying out from the force.
“You want me to kiss you again?”
The need to spit in his face was there. I wanted to with everything I had. That, or bring my knee up between his legs. Had I been wrong about the good? My mind wouldn’t let me believe that. It had to be there, the only question was, why did I care to find it?
“Answer,” he growled.
My head was pushed back into the metal and I whimpered as his mouth pressed back into mine. I waited for the pain, for him to do something that would cause more tears, but the back of my mind was anxious to see if he’d suddenly turn gentle. He didn’t give it to me. Pressure from his teeth bit into my top lip, pulling out with just enough strength to make my feet shift. Fuck, it hurt…so good. How was I even enjoying any of this? Even just a little? It reaffirmed just how unstable I was in my mind.
“I’m going to mark you up so good. You just wait. Now, fucking answer.”
He let go, his touch sliding more toward my lips, making them pucker just a fraction while he stared.
“I’m not saying anything until you kiss me right.”
The cold from the blade flattened over my collarbone and my pulse jumped, the air hitching in my lungs. At a leisurely pace, he moved toward my shoulder, drawing it out, and with it, my heart rate. The dull end caught on my skin, scraping along the surface, until he slipped under the strap of my dress. My body tugged the smallest amount as it gave way.
“Oh, slave. You don’t know what you do to me.” Scratching from the tip made a path over my chest, barely existent with the lack of pressure, but felt intensified from the alarm of him possibly breaking the skin. My fingers twitched as I took in his words. I wasn’t sure if this was the good leaking through or if it was still his dark side.
The back of the strap pulled against me as he leveled the blade under the remaining one and pulled it toward him, away from my chest. My mouth rambled while I fought the uneasiness. “Tell me. What do I do to you?”
Up and down, he caressed the fabric with the knife, never slicing, only teasing as if he would.
“You didn’t ask properly, therefore you don’t get an answer.” With a tug, the cloth broke free, catching on my tight nipples as the dress began to drop. Despite the fact that he could cut my skin at any moment, the animalistic lust on his face kept my body humming to see what he’d do next. I wanted him, regardless of whether I should or not.
“Will you please tell me, Master?” I lowered my voice, dropping my tone to show him just how much. “I’m dying to know. Please.”
“Dying…” His eyes rose to mine. “You should feel right at home then.” Master jerked the dress down, exposing my breasts and gripping one with just the right amount of pressure. As he brought the knife over the swell and down toward the hard nub begging for attention, wetness settled between my thighs.
“Breath any deeper and you might regret it.”
The scratching came back as he bent his wrist and grazed my tightened skin with the pointed end. My lids lowered while pleasure mingled with the need to pull back.
When he turned the dull edge against me and eased it over the sensitive tip, I couldn’t stop the moan that filled the space between us. His eyes rose to mine, the edge of his lips pulling back into a smile that was so sexy, I fought to breath at all.
“I think you like my knife more than you’re willing to admit.” He jerked me forward, fisting the material of my dress in his hands. Ripping assaulted my ears as he cut through the top, only to use his hands to tear through the rest. I was pulled more toward him with each yank of his hands.
“I like it sometimes,” I barely managed to get out. My mind went back to the earlier question. “What do I do to you, Master?” Tell me something. Anything. I wasn’t sure why it was so important to know. Maybe I longed to be able to redeem such a viscous man. One who did things to me that I enjoyed, yet feared. I wasn’t ignorant to the fact that some people weren’t salvageable, but I longed to see a different side of the one before me. If he had both good and bad, perhaps…fuck, I had to be looking for a way to justify what I was feeling.
The jacket fell to the floor and he stepped back, taking off the cuffs links from his shirt and placing them on the tray that held the knives, saws, and scalpels. When his shirt opened, my stare dropped right to my signature.
“Why don’t you tell me what you do to me, slave. Why did I allow you to scar me?”
Still, I couldn’t look away. Even when he unbuckled the belt and pulled it free from the loops, I stayed transfixed to the letters I’d cut into his lower stomach.
“Moment of insanity? Maybe you wanted to cut me enough to suffer though carrying something you might not want, like my name. I don’t think you would have done it had I not given permission.”
The spell was broken as he surged forward. I could barely focus before his hand pushed against my forehead and pinned my head to the post.
“You think I need your permission to do what I want?” Fire over my shoulder had me sucking in air. My mind said to jerk, to fight to try to get away. Rationality said if I moved, the pain would be a hell of a lot worse.
Up and down, and then, up and down again. The angles already told me what I couldn’t see. The bastard had branded me with the letter M. It had to have been no bigger than a quarter, but it was there, nonetheless.
“You son of a bitch.” I swallowed past the lump in my throat and the tears clouding my vision.
There was that smile again. “My mother was lovely, thank you very much. A kind soul. Nothing like me or my father.”
I flinched as the knife continued to draw fear. He pushed the flat side in, only to graze more with the tip. I glanced down, watching him smear the blood. Smooth and warm, it traveled toward my neck at his lead.
“You still want to die?” The weapon inched closer to my throat as I tried to ground myself and face him. The moment our eyes met, he paused, pushing until I sucked in at the slight sting.
“I still want you to kiss me,” I countered, not able to answer his question. “And not like the animal you were before. I want you to do it right.” My mouth closed, only to open again. “And you own me a D on your shoulder. I’ll take that too when you’re finished.”
Master shook his head. Although his face told me he was furious, his eyes held something altogether different. Amusement? I could only hope that I’d somehow broken though his tough exterior. I was beginning to lose hope.
“I owe you nothing. The only D concerning me and you, is my dick in your pussy. That’s it. Oh,” he smiled, “and death. That’s a D, too.”
I hissed at the new sting, right next to the other. “Will you stop fucking sticking me with that thing? I’m not your Goddamn cutting board.” I turned my face away from him, knowing I was about to be in a shitload of trouble. I just couldn’t resist riling him. If he wasn’t going to show me his good side, I’d see just how dark his bad side truly was. “I don’t like this anymore. Unless you give me something else to work with, like gentle mixed with your barbarian ways, I’m afraid I’m going to have to put a stop to this. I’m growing rather bored of your treatment.” Please don’t let him hit me…or worse.
My eyes glanced over in time to see the shock dissolve into real anger. Fury, even. “I bore you? Really? I wasn’t aware this was a fucking vacation, slave. Here, let’s fix that, shall we? We’ll start with a makeover. Women get those when they go on holidays, right?” A handful of my hair was collected in his fist and I gasped as the knife settled above his grip.
“Oh, God! Please, Master,” I begged. “Don’t do it. Don’t—”
My head jerked and I felt my lip quiver at the long curls hanging loose from his grasp. I almost couldn’t believe it. He’d cut my fucking hair off with his knife!
“Oh we’re just getting start, love. Best keep still if you don’t want to get cut in the process.”
A sob exploded out as the length fell to my chin and more of my hair was collected. How had I thought to push him? That he could be good? The man wasn’t. Not at all. He was a fucking monster. The devil, himself.
I tried to move, to escape his grasp, but there was nowhere to go. “Just a little more. Then, we can start on your massage. Women get those too, right? I think the flogger will do the job perfectly.
“I hate you,” I breathed out. “I’ve said it before, but I really mean it this time. I’ve never hated someone so much in my life!”
Master ripped through the last of my long hair and held it up for me to see. “If you hate me, then we’re finally getting somewhere.” The locks fell and he stepped in, cupping my face. The mask fell away, making me hesitate in turning away. I was trapped, transfixed, as he leaned closer, easing his lips into mine. There was nothing brutal about the gentle coaxing he was administering.
Finally getting somewhere? I stood frozen, torn by my need to bite his tongue or try to understand what the fuck was going on. My emotions battled each other, fighting to decide if this was all an act for some ulterior motive. I just wasn’t sure. I could see his good before he kissed me. And from what he said, it almost appeared as if he were trying to teach me a lesson, but of what?
“Kiss me, slave. You’re going to need all the comfort you can get before I start unleashing on you.” His lips pushed back into mine, along with his body. Metal bit into my back, but his hands easing over my ass made it all disappear. I was lifted to straddle his waist while one of his palms slid up, pushing into my lower back.
The tip of his tongue slid along mine, but I didn’t meet it. Instead, I remained perfectly still, devoid of passion. The life that flooded through me had my eyes closing while I tried to hide my reaction. I could feel the wetness covering my face smear as his rough cheek slid against mine. Fuck, even after what he’d done, I was still responding. I couldn’t understand it. Everything in me begged to involve myself in the act.
The kiss deepened while his fingers dug into my flesh. His hard cock rubbed along my ass and I craved to move against it. The need focused, zeroing in on what was beneath me. Before I realized it, I was kissing him back. Pleasure and hunger burst to life, causing me to move. My eyes opened, taking in the stranger before me. I didn’t think — couldn’t, if I was going to stand up for myself.
My teeth sunk down into his bottom lip and I pulled back at the taste of his blood. Where I expected a beast to emerge, all I got was a growl followed by a smile pulling at his mouth. Blood trailed to his chin and he licked the source while I trembled from fear and lust.
“You cut my lip twice,” I rushed in. “I figure we’re even on that account. If you’ll just untie me, I’ll place my mark on your shoulder and we’ll be even. Then, I’ll leave. I’m ready to go home.”
The kiss left my brain muddled. What in the hell was I talking about? He wasn’t going to let me leave. I knew that.
“You’re a brave one, slave.” He licked his lip again, smearing the blood as he wiped his free hand over his chin. “You’re the only one who’s ever made me bleed. The only one I’ve openly bled for. You think I’d just let you walk away from that?”
My mouth parted while I tried to shift against him. The ties rubbed at my numbing wrists, but, still, I pulled.
“What? No response?” His head shook, his eyes narrowing while I saw the anger return. “I didn’t think so. We both know you’re not going anywhere until I’m ready to release you. If,” he emphasized, “I decide to. You still have a long way to go. Just because you had a quick change of heart doesn’t justify letting you go. You’re in limbo. You’ll have to earn your ticket out of here, whether that’s life or death. The choice will be yours to decide, but the outcome will ultimately be mine. With the way you keep misbehaving…we may never reach the time when either of us decides.”
“So, that’s your plan? To let our lives pass by while you keep me in your home, torturing me? You know…” I paused, trying to slow my pulse. I couldn’t stop what needed to be said, regardless of how afraid I was to continue. “Whatever you hold inside, the rage you so easily let rule your life because of what happened in your past…you’re not going to heal yourself by breaking me. Or anyone, for that matter.”
Closer, he stepped, until there wasn’t any distance between us. My breasts were crushed against his chest, but he pushed in harder.
“Oh, slave. You just don’t get it. I don’t do this to slaves because of my loss. This, right here, I do for my pleasure. Besides, you love the torture, don’t you.” Not a question. His eyes held mine, searching for what, I wasn’t sure. All I knew was I had to figure out what I was going to do. I’d been on the path to obey so I could kill myself, but now that I didn’t want to die, would he truly let me go? There was a possibility, but he had said the opposite, too. It all came down to trusting him. Which I didn’t.
“You cutting my hair, what does that prove? That you have power of me? Do you think I don’t see that?”
Fingers gripped into my ass on each side and I tried not to move as he lifted me higher onto his stomach.
“Apparently not. You don’t obey for shit and you push me to my limits. Until you learn, I’ll do whatever I feel is necessary to get you to where you need to be. No matter what that entails.”
My head tilted as I glared. “And where is that? Where do I need to be?”
A growl tore from his throat and I could tell he regretted what he’d said. “Stable in whatever it is you chose. We’re done talking. From this day on, you will listen. You will follow all of my rules. Or so help me, I will lock you down here and beat you every day until you do. And I’m not talking about the pampering you’ve been given so far. I will break you, slave. Something I’m trying like hell not to do, because once you’re that far gone, you’ll be nothing but a fucking robot to my every command. You wouldn’t be able to leave then, even if you wanted to. Why, you might ask? Because you’ll be so dependent on my every word, you’d be lost without me telling you what to do. You’d die without me, or you’d sure as hell want to. I want you strong enough to make your own decisions while still following rules. This is for you. Not me. You. Let this soak in. Strong, but submissive. Do you see?”
His hand gripped my face, pushing my head into the metal. “Lessons. Obedience. Strong state of mind. Drop being proud and bend to me. Only then will you know what you truly want or need in life. And only then will I allow you to choose your path.”
Time slowed as I took in the weeks I’d been here. Suddenly, it was all so clear. This wasn’t a game like I’d warped myself believe. This wasn’t about finding out who he was or digging more into his psyche so I could unravel some huge mystery I held within myself. That didn’t matter as much as the purpose he’d given me. Strong, yet submissive. If I did that, the answers concerning him may come. Possibly, even easier than if I were to keep fighting with him. But most importantly, I’d understand who I was. Bend if I wanted to leave. If I wanted a life again, no matter what the held. Yes. It was time.
“All right…Master.”
His brow drew together and the stiffness in his shoulders seemed to melt as he lowered me to the ground. My head bowed as I waited for what was to come. I knew there’d be no pleasure this time. Maybe never again. It had all been over me goading him for a gentler kiss and the seal of our lips may have just been the death of anything else intimate we might share.