Chapter Fourteen

Chase

I lay my head back down, folding my arms behind me like a pillow as I gaze up at the stars.

Even after all the horrible things that happened in my life, the stars still shine so brightly.

I stretch my arm up, pretending to catch a few in my hand, and as I do, a memory ebbs back. It’s the memory of another starry night from my childhood, my father softly singing “Lucy in the Sky with Diamonds” while he has his arms wrapped around my mother, all three of us standing on the deck of a yacht. My mother turns to him with a frown, asking who Lucy is, and he whispers something in her ear and gives her a kiss on the cheek and the frown is gone.

I place my arm over my chest, sighing. My mom used to tell me to find a nice girl so I could have what she and my father had but I never thought it was possible. I never thought I could find someone who would smile at me the way my mother smiled at my father or someone who I could be myself with like the way my father was with my mother.

Not until I met Lauren.

She’s like this ranch, providing my soul with a little peace in the midst of all this chaos, simple but capable of making a world of difference, refreshing, rejuvenating. She’s like home and for someone like me, who’s been wandering about on adventures and misadventures, she’s exactly what I need.

A smile forms on my lips, which I trace as I remember how I’ve kissed her… everywhere.

Indeed, she’s given me so much. If only there was something I could give her, something I could do for her.

As I’m scratching my chin, I hear footsteps approach.

“Lauren, what do you think about…?”

My words die down in my throat as I hear another one clearing, replacing the sound of the footsteps that have suddenly come to a stop. My heart seems to have stopped as well as I sit up and turn my head, seeing not Lauren but Isaac standing a few feet away.

Fuck.

Quickly, I scramble to my feet and put my shirt on, finding Isaac right in front of me with a shotgun pointed to my chest just as soon as I’ve slipped the piece of clothing over my head.

I stare at the ebony barrel, gleaming in the moonlight. It’s the second time today that a gun has been pointed at me but somehow, this time feels scarier.

Slowly, I lift my gaze along with my hands, hearing leaves crunch beneath my feet as I take a step back.

“Isaac, there’s no need to be hasty. I…”

He steps forward, pressing the barrel of the gun against my chest once more, right over my chest.

“Shut up,” he warns.

Beside him, Smoke seconds the warning with a low growl, having transformed into a different beast, far from the one I know. His black, floppy ears are flat against his head and even from where I’m standing, I can see the hairs all along his backbone raised. His lips are curled, his fangs bared.

Fresh sweat breaks out at the back of my neck and I swallow the knot in my throat.

“Where’s Lauren and what have you done with her?” Isaac asks, not blinking.

“She’s… She…”

I turn my head to look around for her but the barrel of the shotgun touches my cheek, the cold metal scorching as it forces me to look right into the raven eyes of the man in front of me.

“She left,” I answer, doing my best to keep my voice from shaking as the gun points back at my chest.

“And?”

“I don’t know where she is.”

“I asked you two questions, dumbass.”

I point my gaze up, trying to remember the second question.

What was it again? Right. What have I done with her?

I consider lying but then my gaze goes down to Lauren’s blouse and her blue skirt that’s still on the ground near Isaac’s boots.

I’ve lied about a lot of things recently. I might as well come clean regarding this.

I take a deep breath as I put my arms down. “I’m sorry, Isaac.”

“What was that?”

The barrel of the shotgun pokes my chest almost painfully as Isaac’s eyes narrow dangerously.

“I’m sorry,” I force myself to speak more loudly and more contritely. “Believe me, I never—”

Isaac’s fist lands squarely on my jaw, knocking my words and breath away and sending an explosion of pain across my face. Then he grabs the front of my shirt, Smoke growling louder beside him.

“You piece of shit!”

“Daddy, stop!”

Lauren’s voice sounds from a distance as she comes running, her hair damp.

In nothing but her underwear, she stands between Isaac and me, pushing us apart and then pushing her father back.

“Daddy, please!”

Isaac raises the gun, pointing it at me.

“I welcomed you into my ranch and into my home. I hired you, fed you, shared my beer with you. And this is how you repay me?”

“Daddy, no!” Lauren tries to free the gun from her father’s grip but to no avail.

“I only gave you one rule, Chase. One rule. That you not mess with my daughter. But that’s exactly what you did.” His voice quivers along with his hand, the gun lowering slightly. “You… treated my daughter like some brood mare. I saw you. I saw you just now.”

Lauren’s arm falls to her side. “You saw?”

He raises the gun again, pointing the trigger. “I’m going to kill you for what you’ve done.”

Smoke barks.

“No!” Lauren stands in front of me, arms stretched to the sides. “I’m not going to let you do that.”

Isaac falls silent but keeps the gun raised.

“Smoke, that’s enough! Down, boy!” Lauren shouts.

The animal complies, concealing its fangs but still watching me intently.

“You, too, Dad,” Lauren says.

“I’m not a dog.”

“I’m not going to let you shoot him, Dad,” Lauren says, her voice cracking with a plea. “If you want to kill him, you’ll have to kill me first.”

For a moment, Isaac doesn’t move. Then he shoots into the air, the bang deafening in the silence around us and sending the horses neighing in the stables.

He throws the gun on the ground. “See? See what you’ve done to her?!”

He stretches his arm out at Lauren then places his hand on his forehead, his expression anguished.

“I gave you everything I have. And you take my little girl away from me.”

“I’m not a little girl anymore, Dad.”

“You’re right.” Isaac nods, sniffing. “The woman I saw was a complete stranger.”

I see the lump in Lauren’s throat move and she licks her trembling lips before speaking.

“Dad, we didn’t do anything wrong.” She places her hand on her chest. “I’m going to be twenty-one soon.”

“I know how fucking old you are!” he shouts, throwing his arm down. “I’m your father! Or did all that… fooling around in the muck muddle that brain I thought you had?”

Lauren falls silent, her eyes growing wide with horror as her cheeks grow pale. Her hands roll into trembling fists at her sides.

I want to pull her into my arms, to hold her hand at least, but I don’t. As much as I have a part in this, this conversation is between Lauren and her father.

“Tell me,” Isaac speaks as he places his hands on his waist and hangs his head low, his voice calmer. “How long has this been going on? When did this start, huh?”

He scratches his chin.

“Back in the storm cellar during that tornado after I fell asleep or on your mother’s favorite kitchen table when I was drunk, like that time you made all those – what were they? – crepes?”

“No!” Lauren shouts with eyebrows adamantly furrowed.

“That night when you didn’t come home, you were with him, weren’t you?” Isaac asks.

Lauren falls silent.

“And yet, you lied to me. You hid it from me. And now you’re telling me you think you did nothing wrong?” Isaac spits on the ground.

Lauren steps forward. “I would have told you. I wanted to tell you, but I knew you wouldn’t understand.”

“Oh, I understand perfectly.” Isaac nods. “I understand that my daughter is stupid enough to be smitten by a lousy farmhand who has no ounce of gratitude or honor in his body.”

His glare pierces me like a dagger, and I bow my head in remorse. I never meant to hurt him, but I should have known it was inevitable the moment I took interest in Lauren.

“I want you to be off my property by sunrise,” he continues.

“Dad!” Lauren protests. “You can’t do that. Chase…”

I place a firm hand on her shoulder, shaking my head when she turns toward me. Isaac doesn’t need to know about my past or my current situation. Not now.

It’s not going to change what’s happening nor is it going to make what we’ve done forgivable.

Lauren gapes in disbelief but doesn’t say another word.

Isaac picks up his shotgun. “If you ever set foot on my property again, I’ll kill you.”

He picks up Lauren’s clothes next and throws them at her. “You. Back to the house. And for God’s sake, put some clothes on.”

As she hastily puts on her skirt and her blouse, Isaac walks off with Smoke beside him.

“Mr. Calver,” I call after him. “Thank you!”

He just raises a finger in the air and keeps walking.

Lauren frowns as she watches him then turns to me, throwing her arms around me.

“Don’t go,” she whispers in my ear. “I’ll talk to him. Everything will be okay.”

She runs after her father.

As soon as she’s out of sight, I put my shoes on and go back to the old barn, dragging my feet and slouching my shoulders.

There, I pack my things. Not that there’s much to pack. I only have a few shirts, pants, pairs of underwear, and my toiletries. I’m only taking what I came here with and I’m leaving nothing behind.

Except Lauren.

I lay down on the cot as I wait for morning to come, thinking I’ll miss its creaks. I’ll miss the rotting barn, too, and the chirping of crickets at night and birds in the morning. I’ll miss the smell of the hay and yes, even the smell from the animal barns. I’ll miss Smoke and Isaac, even though they hate me. And most of all, I’ll miss Lauren.

She’s practically begged me not to go, but I’ve already made up my mind. It’s for the best, both for her and for me.

Staring at the ceiling with the breeze blowing through my face, my eyelids eventually fall shut, allowing me to get a few winks.

I wake up just before sunrise, the horizon turning purple as the early splotches of sunlight mingle with the night sky.

I get out of bed, take a shower outside the barn, and change my clothes. When I go back to the barn again to fetch my things so I can leave, Lauren is there, sitting on the bed, wringing her hands on her lap. She’s still wearing the collared blouse and the pleated skirt from last night, the rings under her eyes suggesting she hasn’t been able to sleep. When she sees me, she stands up.

“Chase,” she gasps.

I smile at her. “You didn’t have to come and say goodbye.”

She frowns. “Goodbye? You’re really leaving?”

I sit on the edge of the bed as I put on my shoes. “There isn’t any other option, really. I can’t stay here.”

“But you can’t leave.” Lauren kneels in front of me. “Your life is in danger. If you leave, they’ll find you and…”

I touch her chin. “Have you forgotten? They’ve already found me. This place isn’t safe for me anymore. Nowhere is safe.”

She sinks to the floor.

“Did you tell Isaac about me?” I ask her.

“No. I didn’t tell him a thing.”

I nod, putting on my other shoe.

She lifts her head. “Do you really have to go?”

“You know I do. I don’t want to but I have to. There’s somewhere else I have to be, something else I have to do.”

She places her hands on her knees. “Then I’ll come with you.”

I pause, my eyes wide.

“Lauren…”

She gets on her feet. “You can’t leave me here.”

“I can’t get you more involved in this than you already are,” I tell her, walking over to the chair where my backpack is.

“What? Are you trying to push me away again?”

I sigh. “Lauren…”

“If you’re leaving, I’m coming with you, and you can’t stop me just as much as I can’t stop you.”

I gaze into her eyes, seeing her determination in them. Or should I say stubbornness?

“Isaac will be even more furious.”

“I don’t care. He’s decided not to speak to me anymore anyway. I’m not good enough for him anymore. I might as well leave.”

I place my hands on her shoulders. “Lauren, if you’re coming with me just because you’re mad at your father…”

“I’m not.” She takes my hands in hers. “I mean, I am mad at him, but I’m not coming with you because of that. I’m coming with you because I want to stay by your side.”

And I don’t want her to.

I clasp her hands. “I’ll be back for you when all this is over, I promise.”

“I won’t wait.” She shakes her head. “I’ll be with you until it’s all over, not when.”

I let out a deep breath. Damn, she’s stubborn.

“Come on.” She grabs my arm. “We’ll take my car.”