He advanced on me like a wolf stalking its prey.

I felt the fear in my blood, pumping through my body and putting every cell on high alert. My body knew danger was coming and I trembled with the anticipation.

The slap I was almost eagerly anticipating never came, and my poor, confused head was left screaming at me in held-back rage. I wanted him to hit me. I wanted him to react. I wanted him to deserve the hate that coursed through me because of him.

Yet I still recoiled when his hand reached for me. I was expecting a hit, but instead he stroked my cheek so gently I wanted to lean against his hand and whimper against his fingers. I kept looking down as he kneeled next to me on the floor, amidst the pages of the books I’d ruined forever.

Such a stupid thing to do… I loved books, but I felt so completely out of control when my panic attack happened I could barely even remember it.

“Don’t hurt me,” I whispered on an instinct, and he held my face with his fingers on my cheeks. He made me look at him, and my tears spilled over my cheeks, down to my lips and dripped down my chin. “Don’t hurt me, please, I’m so scared. Please.”

“Shut up,” he said, but his voice was surprisingly gentle. “Stupid little girl. Stupid Angel. Fucking stupid, Evangeline.”

I sobbed but he wouldn’t let me move as his lips came closer to mine. I froze up. Completely froze on the spot, the only thing moving was my bottom lip, trembling with fear.

He bit down on it, his teeth digging into my sensitive skin and making me whimper against his mouth. He groaned, moving his hand to the back of my head, letting it rest on the nape of my neck and pulling me in.

And then he kissed me, and I felt myself falling in love with a monster.

He didn’t kiss like he fucked, and I had a feeling he’d decided to make a change just for me.

He kissed me sweetly, almost innocently, until I gasped against his lips and deepened my first kiss. And then he did it hungrily, with his lust and mine mixing together, so palpable around us I could taste it. He bit my lips and made me his with a single kiss that only lasted seconds, but I wanted it to go on forever.

“Be good for me, Angel,” he muttered against my mouth, and I moved closer to him desperately, so needy for another taste, another lick. Even another bite from him… Anything.

“I will,” I stuttered. “I’ll be better, please. Please a little bit more.”

“No,” he groaned against my lips as I tried to kiss him clumsily. I didn’t have a fucking clue what I was doing, and the only thing I knew was that I wanted to taste him some more. So I kept trying, kept trying to kiss him and make him keep going for me, because I needed it so very badly.

He took hold of my hands and clasped them over my back, pulling me off him. When I looked into his eyes they seemed so dark they were almost black, and I knew he wanted me as badly as I fucking wanted him.

“Enough,” he scolded me gently, and my lips parted desperately for him. “Enough now, Evangeline. You’re going to bed now, little girl.”

I tried to protest, but he didn’t want to hear it, pressing a finger firmly against my lips to shut me up.

“Go to bed,” he said, and pulled me up to my shaky legs. “You need to get some rest, little girl. I’ll come find you in the morning, I promise.”

I stared at him, once again waiting for my punishment. But when I didn’t move, he merely smacked my ass, making me gasp out loud.

“Evangeline,” he said roughly. “Bed. Fucking. Now.”

And I practically ran out of the room despite my legs being shaky. They carried me all the way to the room with the cage, and I crawled into it with my heart beating loudly. I left the door open this time, because I secretly wanted him to come and drag me out by my hair. Either punish me or comfort me some more, anything, just so I could get another kiss.

But he never came, and I ended up lying on my back, staring at the bars above me. It felt weird, and I felt alone, but in a way, it was comforting.

That is, until I fell asleep…

* * *

The little girl’s daddy wasn’t her daddy anymore.

No, it seemed like another man was living inside the man who used to hold her close, kiss her chubby cheeks and throw her in the air while she squealed with delight. The little girl couldn’t fully understand what had happened. Where had her daddy gone? And who stole his body, who was the impostor that dragged himself through their house, made the little girl cry, and screamed at her mommy at the top of his voice?

It surely wasn’t the man who raised her, and it upset the little girl so very much.

And then one day, her mommy told her she’d have to find a job, and her daddy would be the one staying home with her. She sat the little girl down and explained everything, and then she told her she was going to work a shift at the bar in town. The little girl had never been in there – her parents never allowed it, and called it seedy. She didn’t understand why her mommy had to leave for work there, it didn’t make any sense. And when her mom left her with the shell that used to be her daddy, the little girl cried her eyes out.

She cried so much she upset her mom, and she left in tears too. This made Daddy angry, and he put her in her bedroom, telling her not to come out, no matter what happened.

The little girl tried so very hard to be good. She cried herself to sleep, but woke up what felt like minutes later. She couldn’t rest when her family was breaking apart like that. She had to go check on her daddy and make sure he was alright.

She went downstairs, and what greeted her was complete, deafening silence. She lingered on the stairs, her foot a few inches away from the floor. She was afraid to step into the living room, and later, she would regret not listening to what Daddy had told her. She should’ve been a good girl and stayed in her room.

Because little girls should always listen to their daddies.

Daddy knows best, after all, and the little girl was about to learn just that.

She walked into the room, and the first thing she saw were her father’s feet. They looked a little weird, because they weren’t touching the floor. Instead, they were a few inches above it.

She ran up to her daddy. He was hanging from the ceiling and it looked like he was sleeping.

She hugged her daddy’s knees and told him she was sorry for being a bad girl and coming out of her room when she wasn’t supposed to. She hoped Daddy would be able to forgive her for being a bad little girl.

But Daddy didn’t say a word, and as she hugged him, he swayed from side to side, but his hands never moved.

She looked up at him, confused.

“Daddy, what’s wrong?” she asked in her small voice, but now she felt scared because Daddy wasn’t responding. She shook him by his knees and Daddy still didn’t say a word. His eyes were wide open and his mouth was slack, but he still didn’t reply.

The little girl thought maybe her daddy was ignoring her, so she decided to cheer him up. She brought down all her favorite toys and set them around in a circle around her daddy’s dangling feet. She talked to him as she played, tugging on his trousers every so often to get his attention. But still, not a word from Daddy.

With all her teddies lined up in a circle, the little girl realized something was very wrong.

She needed help, so she ran out of the house, stopping tentatively on the lawn. She wasn’t supposed to leave the house alone, but the front yard was empty. She held her bunny in her hand as she went outside.

There was something that caught her eye though, and she looked at the white garage door.

Big, bright red letters stared her in the eye. She didn’t really know how to read yet, though Mommy had been doing her best to teach her. She stared at the letters and tried to make them out.

C-R-I-M-E… No, C-R-I-M-I-N-A-L. And there was another word, but that one she didn’t understand. What was a bastard? She had no idea.

Her mommy came home then, and the little girl ran up to her on the street when she saw her.

“Mommy, Daddy won’t talk to me,” she sobbed. “Daddy’s hanging from the ceiling, and he doesn’t want to talk to me. What did I do wrong, Mommy?”

Her mother clasped a hand over her mouth, and looked towards the house. And then she ran inside, leaving her little girl alone on the road.

She sat down in the middle of it, putting her favorite teddy, a little bunny, in her lap. And she waited for someone to come and get her, and to explain why Daddy’s feet weren’t touching the ground.

* * *

I woke up screaming. But the sounds were muffled, because I’d learned not to wake anyone up when I was having my nightmares.

I crawled out of the cage, my body covered in sweat, my palms on the floor. I tried to force myself to breathe normally, but I fucking couldn’t. I was gasping for breath, doing my best to get it to my lungs, but desperately failing.

I wanted him. I wanted Daddy.

Leaving the room, I had to hold on to the doorframe so I wouldn’t topple over. I walked down the hallway with my bare feet brushing the floor, so scared of overstepping, my heart pounded when I thought about how angry this would make him. But I still kept walking, on and on and on until I reached the door I knew led to his bedroom.

I opened the door and it creaked as it gave way. He shot up, leaning on his elbows as he stared at me.

“What’s wrong?” he asked in a gruff, still half-asleep voice.

“Daddy.” I choked on the word, and I practically ran inside.

Crawling into bed next to him, I prayed he wouldn’t be angry with me, and I hoped he wouldn’t kick me out. I needed him so very badly in that moment, and I cuddled as close as I possibly could, clutching his body like it was my lifeline, the only thing connecting me to the real world.

“Shh, little girl,” he muttered as I started to sob. He kissed the top of my hair and pulled me closer, until I lay sprawled on his chest. My sobs quieted, and I hung to him closely.

“I’m so sorry,” I whispered. “I know I shouldn’t be here, I just can’t help it…”

“You know you need to work to be in my bed,” he grunted, and my body tensed. “Good girls do as they’re told, and you’ve been so very bad, Evangeline.”

I shook all over as he took his hands off me, so scared he would toss me aside just like everyone else had.

“If you want to sleep in my bed, you’ll have to earn it,” he told me, his fingers stroking my back. “But not tonight, Angel. Tonight, you get what you need the most.”

He pulled me closer and I exhaled a breath of relief as he held onto my shaking body and made it all better.

He didn’t let go of me that whole night, and for the first time, my nightmares were subdued.