Seven

WHAT IF

A SOFT BREEZE LIFTED MY hair as I stared silently at the stars. The moon shone in the gloom of the night sky. The old man’s face hid behind a sliver of shadows as the stars danced around it, peeking out like fireflies at twilight. I’d always preferred the darkness of night to daylight. The vastness of the universe made most feel small and insignificant, but for me, it was a time to dream. A time to plot the course of my life away from my family. I’d lie in my bed trying to find the constellations, wondering if there was a man out there staring at the same night sky, thinking about me as well. I’d try to picture him. His hair color, his eye color, whether he was tall or medium height. His face would never come to me, but his presence was always there somewhere between dusk and dawn. He’d appear in that place between consciousness and dreams, a shadowed figure reaching out his hand for me to take hold, beckoning me to trust him.

Looking over my shoulder where Bo sat with Devin, I wondered if I’d finally found that man. “Men at some time are masters of their fates. The fault is not in our stars but in ourselves,” I whispered. The abbreviated quote from Shakespeare’s Julius Caesar seemed apropos. I was master of my fate if I chose to follow it. If I didn’t, it wasn’t fate’s fault, but my own.

Had fate led me to Bo?

I’d accepted Bo as the man in my life with little argument, but I was holding back from the one aspect of a relationship that brought a man and woman closer, and I wasn’t sure why anymore.

I wasn’t a child, a fresh-faced college student with stars in her eyes, but a woman. So why was I acting like the virgin I was?

“How did you know that Devin was the one for you?” I asked Cali.

She and Poppy were sitting on the top railing of the horse corral, silently taking in the beauty of the night as well.

“I knew he was the one when I jumped on the trolley. I was prepared to turn my back on us to protect him from my granddaddy, but I couldn’t breathe at the thought of what I was leavin’ behind.”

I closed my eyes, wondering what it would feel like if Bo were to change his mind. I drifted back to earlier in the evening when he’d said he wanted to slow down, and how my immediate reaction had been emptiness. I’d turned my back on him to hide my tears, but I remembered a pain in my chest, as if I couldn’t fill my lungs. The thought of being so close to what I’d always wanted had tumbled around in my head, then extreme relief had pulsed through me when he’d clarified his statement.

“You said that you thought fallin’ in love happens by chance. Serendipity. That it’s like walkin’ into a room and bam, you just know when you lay eyes on them that they’re the one. Is that how it happened to you?”

Cali looked down at me a smiled. “Bam,” she muttered. “It was like the planets aligned when I finally reached out and took hold of his hand.”

“Bam,” I whispered to myself.

“What’s runnin’ through your head?” Cali asked, looking down on me.

“A bunch of what-ifs.”

“Such as?” Poppy asked.

“What if I take a leap of faith and give myself completely to him and it doesn’t work?”

“There are no guarantees in life, you said so yourself.”

I smirked. “Always easier to give advice than to take it.”

“Well, to quote you further, if you’re lookin’ for a life free from pain and heartache, you won’t find it. You just have to trust your instincts. What does your heart tell you?” Cali said.

“My heart wants him,”—an impish grin pulled across my mouth—“and so does my body.”

“So you’re holdin’ back because?” Poppy questioned.

“I guess I’m holdin’ back that one aspect of our relationship as a way of protectin’ my heart.”

“Well, there’s no reason to rush if you’re not sure,” Cali said, jumping down from the railing. “But I can tell you that the bond that forms between a man and a woman once sex is introduced is a whole other level. The connection you’ll have with Bo will be deeper than what you’re feelin’ already.”

I rolled my lip between my teeth and looked back at Bo again. As if he could sense I was watching him, his head turned toward me and our eyes locked. I barely noticed when Poppy and Cali walked back toward the house; I was caught in Bo’s invisible web. I could feel his eyes burning a trail from my head to my toes, and my body reacted. The intensity in his gaze reached across the courtyard and pinned me in place, sucking air from my lungs. Holding back from him was almost physically painful, leaving my body battered and bruised without him landing a single blow.

I knew all about the scars from emotional neglect, but now I was the one inflicting them on myself. Life was about experiences. About falling down and getting back up to fight another day. It was about collecting scars that proved you’d lived it to the fullest, and I realized I was being a coward. I wanted him with every fiber of my being, and the only reason I was holding back from him was to protect myself. That wasn’t living; that was hiding from life.

Holding Bo’s eyes, I turned toward the barn, mumbling Sonia Ricotti’s words of wisdom. “Surrender to what is, let go of what was, have faith in what will be.”

When I reached the opening, I looked back at Bo. He was leaning against a post watching me. I turned fully to him and stared back. His relaxed stance became rigid, and he pushed off the post, facing me, watching. Neither of us moved. My heart began to trip a beat of anticipation as I willed him to follow with my eyes. In the pale moonlight, I saw the moment he read my thoughts. His jaw tightened, and then he moved. I turned without looking back, then disappeared into the inky blackness of the barn, and waited.

 

 

Bo’s muscles strained for control as he followed Sienna into the barn. His baser needs were howling at him to hunt her down and make her his completely. To fill her body with his, spilling his seed into her as a warning for all other males to back off.

The need to claim her was so powerful, he stopped at the opening and took a deep breath to control the burning need running rampant through his blood.

Movement caught his eye, and he looked toward the hay loft. Sienna was climbing a ladder, carrying a wool blanket across her shoulder. Without a word, he followed. When he reached the ladder, he paused and took another deep breath so he didn’t scare her. He felt wired, out of control, and he needed his hard-fought control at that moment.

He took each step slowly, patiently, until his heart slowed to a steady beat. On the top rung, his heart skipped a beat. Sienna had shed all of her clothes and was standing at a window, gazing up at the moon. Pale silver light highlighted her curves, leaving others in shadow. She looked ethereal in the heavenly light seeping through the window, and his breath caught for a moment before he moved.

Stripping his shirt from his body as he approached, he could feel his hands shake in anticipation. He’d left his boots off after he’d taken a shower, so the only thing between them now were his jeans.

Standing behind Sienna, Bo didn’t touch her. Afraid he’d move too fast, he leaned in, ran his nose down the side of her neck, and breathed in her unique scent of sweet almonds and sex. Lust ran rampant through his blood, and his lungs froze, trapping her essence inside.

His fingers itched to touch her soft skin, so he released the button on his jeans as his tongue snaked out and tasted her neck, and he stepped out of them. Reaching around her shoulders, Bo cupped her chin and nudged it sideways until her neck was bared to him. He ran his teeth gently across her tender flesh, then whispered, “You’re sure? No doubts?” as her body trembled. Sienna answered him by rubbing her ass against his throbbing cock.

Bo hissed at the contact and grabbed her hands, forcing them to the window. “Keep your hands on the window,” he rumbled low. His control was wrung tight, if she touched him again, he’d lose it. “Don’t move.”

Running his hands down her body to her legs, Bo spread them until he had full access to her slick, wet heat. With more patience than he felt, he ran a finger across her silken folds and hissed. She was dripping already in anticipation, and his control slipped further from reach. “This is mine,” he growled, making sure she understood exactly what was about to happen. “Once I slip inside, you’ll belong to me completely.”

Sienna sucked in a breath on a whimper and nodded.

Inch by inch, Bo caressed and played her body until a fine sheen of sweat covered her. He worked her core with precision until she was moaning with the need to orgasm, but he wouldn’t let her find release. He was teaching her. Teaching her to feel with her body and to follow his lead. Teaching her body to know only him, and what he could do to her.

Sweat trailed down her neck as she writhed on his hand. Bo leaned in and swept it off with his tongue, growling, “Do you want my cock?” When she arched into him, trying to reach for the precipice, he wouldn’t let her. He’d given her all he was going to give her with his hands. Her next orgasm would be around his cock.

“Yes,” she whispered, out of breath.

In one fluid motion, Bo picked her up and moved to the blanket she’d spread out on the hay. He placed her gently on top of it, then dropped to his knees, crouching between her legs. “Ride my face first,” he growled, then covered her core with his mouth, anchoring her in place with his hands. His tongue danced across her slick flesh, building the embers he’d fanned with his hand. She buried her hands in his hair, arching her back with the sensations playing across her body. When she began to moan with a coming orgasm, Bo slid up her body, took her mouth, and then gently slid inside her warm heat until the barrier that held her innocence stopped him. Sienna ripped her mouth from his and looked up at him. He expected to see fear of the unknown, but lust reflected back at him. He pulled out and slid back in until he couldn’t go any further, gritting his jaw to keep from slamming into her. When he slid out from inside her again, he paused at the entrance and held her eyes. He was waiting for her to give him a signal. Waiting for her to give him permission to take her innocence.

She wet her lips and stared back at him. Then in a burst of passion, Sienna grabbed his ass and impaled herself on his swollen cock, shredding her innocence in a single thrust. Bo moaned at the sudden heat wrapping fully around him, and Sienna gasped at the intrusion.

An emotion he couldn’t describe spread through Bo like warm honey, and he slammed his mouth over hers as he held still, waiting for her to adjust to his size. Sienna wrapped her arms around his neck and kissed him back with equal intensity, and then began to move against him, unable to stop the riot of sensation flooding her system.

“Slow,” Bo whispered in her ear. “Slow and steady. Let me bring you with me.”

Clutching his shoulders, she held on as he pulled out, then pushed back in slowly, easing into her so he didn’t hurt her. He increased his tempo gradually until she arched her head back, and moaned. Gritting his teeth to keep from exploding, he kept at her body until they were both wrung tight with need. When she was ready, he pulled her leg higher on his hip and slipped inside her body to his root. Sienna gasped at being completely full of him. Wanting his name spilling from her lips as she came, he rolled his hips, causing her to cry out, then thrust back in. He reached down when her moans began to sound like pleading and rolled her clit. Her back arched and her mouth opened as he stimulated her, and he surged in on a groan of his own as her hot walls squeezed him, milking his cock instinctually. She was a fucking natural. The hottest woman he’d taken to bed in his life, and she belonged to him completely, no one else. Possessiveness raged through Bo, and he vowed that he’d do whatever it took to keep it that way.

“Bo!” Sienna gasped, clutching his shoulder. She was frantic for release.

He rolled her clit faster and watched her eyes roll back in her head. When she began gasping his name, and her body began to shudder with her climax, he thrust hard twice more and then exploded deep within her, covering her mouth with his as they both moaned through their orgasm.

Once the shudders stopped, Bo rolled to keep from crushing Sienna, taking her with him, wrapping her tightly against him while his stampeding heart tried to slow.

She was limp against his chest, while her breath came in pants.

Tilting his head up, he brushed his lips against her forehead, asking in a hushed voice, “Did I hurt you?”

She shook her head in answer, then brushed a kiss across his chest.

He heard her tears before he saw them, and froze. Pulling her further up his body until she was eye to eye with him, he searched her face. “Talk to me.”

She bit her lip, then shook her head.

Bo rolled again until she was pinned beneath him, then ran a hand through her hair before brushing a kiss across her mouth. “Did I rush you?” he asked, praying to God he hadn’t misread her.

“No,” she hiccupped. “I’m…It’s just…It was everything I hoped it would be. Better than I could have imagined.”

“But?” he asked, trepidation setting in.

“I’m just afraid it will end. I’ve wanted this for so long that I’m scared to lose it.”

Bo blinked, then pulled her up and crushed her to his chest. “I’m not goin’ anywhere.”

“Don’t make promises you can’t keep.”

He was treading in dangerous waters now, and he knew it. After hearing about her situation with her family, he knew she had insecurity issues. Her family had led her to believe she was worthless in their eyes. It was his job to repair the damage they’d caused.

Bo rolled a third time until Sienna was perched on his chest. Then he grabbed her face with his hands.

“You think I lived twenty-eight years without knownin’ a fuckin’ great woman when I see one? You think I lived through what my dad endured without learnin’ a thing or two about women in general?”

She shook her head.

“I told you before you’re my desire, my fuckin’ wet dream. My life was gray before you entered it. I woke up the day I laid eyes on you, baby. You made the sun shine for me for the first time in fuckin’ years. I’m not lettin’ that go without a fight. I want you in my life, and I don’t see that changin’ . . . Ever.”

Her bottom lip began to tremble, then she crushed her mouth against his. He opened for her and poured every ounce of emotion he could into the kiss until Sienna was whimpering with need again.

He knew he should hold off taking her again, but he needed to show her how much he wanted her, so he slid back inside her as she lay on his chest and surged deep. Sienna moaned in his mouth at his intrusion, and pushed up to her knees and began riding his cock with enthusiasm, her body hot and pliant under his hands. She was hungry for what he could give her after suppressing her needs all these years.

Reaching down, Bo found her clit and began working her, bringing her closer to release as he met her downward thrust with his own. When her head fell back, he reached up and grabbed her shoulders and pounded harder until a low keening noise broke from her throat. He lost all control then and jackknifed up, rolling her to her back and sliding back in deep.

“You’re mine,” he hissed.

She whimpered.

“I’m not lettin’ you go,” he vowed.

Her back arched as her mouth opened in a noiseless cry of passion, and Bo drove in deeper and held, throwing his own head back as he pulsed inside her, making her his again in every way.

When her eyes opened, still hooded with residual passion, he brushed a kiss across her mouth. “Do you understand now?”

Her eyes softened, and she nodded. “I’m not letting you go either,” she whispered back.

“Good,” he returned, kissing her thoroughly once more.

Bo collapsed to his side, exhausted, and wrapped her in his arms, tucking the blanket around them both.

“Sleep,” he ordered.

She didn’t answer, and he looked down at her. Her eyes were closed, her face slack, and he smiled. He’d fucked her into submission.

As Sienna’s breathing evened out, it hit Bo that they hadn’t used protection. The thought she could be carrying his child hit him like a ton of bricks, and he clutched her tighter to him.

Then an arrogant smile pulled across his lips.

 

 

With heavy lids, I opened my eyes slowly. Still wrapped tightly in Bo’s arms, I smiled. Then I frowned. The moon was still up in the night sky, but there was a bright light spilling into the hay loft.

Blinking to clear my eyes from sleep, I stared at the light. It seemed to move, dance across the courtyard like children chasing each other in a game of hide and seek. I squinted my eyes against the light and then sat up in a panic . . . “Fire!”

Bo sat upright, then stood and grabbed his jeans, completely alert and in control. “Get dressed,” he ordered.

I fumbled in the darkness for my top and jeans as Bo pulled on his shirt.

He rushed to the window and looked out. “The main house is on fire.”

“Go!” I cried out as I fumbled with my jeans. “You have to get everyone out!”

Bo hesitated for a moment. He seemed torn between leaving me alone and waiting for me to dress.

“I’ll be right behind you! Go!”

Nodding, he disappeared down the ladder and out of sight. I ran to the window and watched as he tried to open the front door of the house. He stepped back, shaking his hand. The fire was too hot. Grabbing a chair from the porch, he smashed in a window near the side of the house and disappeared inside.

“Please, God. Let him get them in time.”

Throwing on my shoes, I climbed down the ladder and met Troy and Brantley in the courtyard. They bunked in cabins on the opposite side of the ranch and must have seen the fire. They looked wired as they grabbed hoses and tried to tame the blaze crawling up the side of the house, bursting windows on both levels.

I was frantic to help, but my cell was inside, so I couldn’t call 911. All I could do was stand there helplessly and wait for Bo to emerge from the inferno with Devin and the Wallflowers.

What seemed like hours passed before Poppy ran out the front door with a towel covering her head, then Devin ran outside carrying Cali over his shoulder, followed by Bo carrying his boots.

I ran to Bo and leaped into his arms, overcome with emotion. He could have died. They all could have died.

“I’m okay,” he mumbled in my ear, then squeezed me once before letting me go to help Troy and Brantley.

The fire department arrived ten minutes later, but it was too late. The fire had engulfed most of the structure.

I huddled together with Poppy and Cali. They’d escaped in nothing but a T-shirt, so the fire department had given them blankets to cover themselves with. We watched in horror as the power of the flames destroyed everything in its path.

It took the men and the voluntary firefighters more than an hour to control the blaze. By the time the last flicker of fire was doused, all that was left was a charred shell of memories forever lost.

“How do we tell Natasha?” Poppy whispered.

“I don’t know. But we don’t tell her until after Boris is out of surgery. She has enough to worry about this mornin’,” I replied.

“We need clothes,” Cali stated, then looked around at the destruction. “And more help.”

“Are you thinkin’ Bernice and Eunice?”

She nodded. “They can help Natasha with Boris while we handle the cleanup here.”

“What about work? Don’t you have to be back tomorrow?”

“I’ll call Jolene. The only book I’m working on is the one with family connections to Poe. They can wait another week. This is more important.”

I’d been Alexandra Poe’s right-hand woman for the past three years, so it was natural for me to start prioritizing the cleanup.

“We’ll need to call the insurance company first,” I explained. “They won’t want us touching anything until they’ve investigated the fire. I’ll head to town as soon as the stores are open and get clothes and food for all of us, while you call your aunts and rally the troops. Once we know Boris has made it through the surgery, we can break the news to Natasha.”

“Bernice can handle that. She’s been friends with them for over twenty years,” Cali said.

“We’ll need phones,” Poppy pointed out. “Ours were lost in the fire. I plugged them all into chargers in the kitchen.”

“Devin’s wasn’t,” Cali announced. “I felt it stickin’ out of his jeans pocket when he carried me out of the house.”

I turned and walked over to Devin. I could see his phone peeking out from his back pocket just like Cali said, so I snatched it out and turned back to the girls, grinning when I heard Bo chuckle.

I handed it to Cali. “Call Bernice so we can get the ball rollin’.”

A strong hand wrapped around mine and tugged me to the side and kept walking. I quickened my step to keep up with Bo. When we were far enough away from the girls, he turned me into his arms and kissed me. Thoroughly.

“This is not how I envisioned wakin’ up with you this mornin’,” he whispered. “How are you feelin’?”

With all that had happened, I hadn’t had time to process the night before. A blush began to spread up my neck and settled in my cheeks. I’d slept with this man, and now I had to look him in the eyes.

“I’m fine,” I told his chest.

“Look me in the eyes.”

“I’d rather not.”

“Why?” he asked hesitantly.

“You’ve seen all my bits, and I’m embarrassed.”

His body shook as a low rumble of laughter filled my ears. “I’ve tasted all your bits, too.”

I buried my face in his chest. “You’re a very naughty man.”

“And you’re cute.”

I peeked up at him, and he winked at me.

“Was I any good?” I whispered, then held my breath. I would die a thousand deaths of humiliation if he said it was just okay for him. It had been . . . otherworldly, fantastic, perfect for me.

Bo blinked, then a sexy grin pulled across his mouth. “If you’d been any better, you would have killed me.”

It was my turn to blink. “You did most of the work. How could I have killed you?”

Bo pulled me in closer, then leaned in to whisper in my ear. “I’ve never wanted a woman the way I wanted you. Every touch, every whispered word drove me wild. As long as you’re responding, I’ll keep giving you what you want. Even if it kills me.”

“So I almost killed you by enjoying myself?”

He grinned.

That wasn’t exactly otherworldly, but he did seem pleased.

I rolled my lips between my teeth and thought about what he’d said. He loved the way I responded? Hmm. “You’ll probably need some rest if that’s the case, because I don’t anticipate disliking anything you do to me in the foreseeable future.”

His grin turned arrogant.

I rolled my eyes.

“Time for a serious talk,” he said, pulling me deeper into his body. “First, we didn’t use protection last night. That’s on me. I should have been lookin’ out for you.”

“That’s not on you. I’m just as responsible for my own body,” I sighed. “But it’s not an issue since I’m on the pill.”

“All right. Then I need to tell you that the man who tried to rob you two days ago was found beaten. He’s in a coma, and my gut tells me it’s connected somehow to you three women. Now we have this mysterious fire on our hands, and I’m on red alert. I don’t want you or the girls out of our sight until we know different.”

I felt the blood drain from my face. “You think the fire was on purpose. That someone set it to kill us?”

“I’m sayin’ I don’t like coincidences, and until the fire marshal gives me the cause for the fire, I don’t want to take chances with any of you ladies.”

“You’re scarin’ me now.”

Bo hugged me tighter. “Good. Bein’ scared will keep you on guard. And I need you on guard right now. So, no more takin’ off on four-wheelers. No more ridin’ horses unless it’s under my or Devin’s supervision. We’ve got a lot of work to do here, and I don’t have time to keep huntin’ you women down when you get a wild hair up your ass. So I need you not to be unpredictable until we know what the fuck is goin’ on.”

I nodded, but added, since he was disparaging me and my friends, “We aren’t unpredictable, just so you know. We spent years keepin’ to ourselves, so now we’re just makin’ up for lost time.”

“Don’t kid yourself.” Bo grinned. “You’re as unpredictable as a hornet, and the three of you together is like a swarm.”

I narrowed my eyes. “Careful, or you’ll get stung.”

Bo snagged me around the neck and pulled my mouth to his. “You won’t sting me,” he mumbled against my lips. “You like what I do to your body.”

“Arrogant,” I mouthed back.

“Truthful,” he answered and then kissed me hard, wet, and deep to prove his point.