Chapter 12
Daisy
Two days! Two freaking days since Big John had dropped me off at the clubhouse, fucked me like it was our last time, and then disappeared without a word. I hadn’t seen him since. Thank goodness Jasmine was there, because otherwise I would have taken my crap and walked back to my house. She was just as upset that Clay had disappeared, too. It didn’t take a genius to figure out that they were together. We had questioned Hawk, since he was their president, only to be told in his cold and moody way that it was club business and, therefore, none of ours. His wife, Audra, had been sweeter about it and more understanding about our anger. She and the other old ladies had taken us under their wing and had explained how MC’s worked.
Well, their MC, anyway.
I’d learned that most outlaw clubs followed the same formula, but that each had subtle differences. The one constant seemed to be that it was better not to know about “club business” so that you would never have to lie if the law came calling. Not that any of the old ladies that I had met would ever have betrayed their men. They seemed to be genuinely enamored with those rough, dirty-mouthed bikers, and the men were just as captivated with their women. Proof of that had been shown by more than one demonstration of affection between the couples who were wandering around the clubhouse.
The couples didn’t seem to care if they had an audience during a smoldering kiss or an intimate touch, even when it sometimes caused me to look away uncomfortably. Despite these awkward moments, I had to admit to myself that thinking about Big John doing the same to me was a turn-on that I didn’t want to mull over for too long. His intensity scared me at times. I guessed that that was why he was the enforcer. From what little I’d learned from the other women, his job was to keep the peace, and to keep the club safe, by whatever means were necessary. Maybe I didn’t want to know exactly what that meant.
“How’s it going?” I jumped slightly at the sound of Jasmine’s voice behind me. She laughed. “Were you daydreaming?”
“Kind of,” I smiled, reaching for another head of lettuce. I’d offered to make the salad for lunch/dinner, and was in the kitchen next to the huge farmer’s sink, washing the veggies as I went along. “What are you up to?” Jasmine wasn’t a domestic kind of girl who enjoyed doing mundane things like cooking and cleaning, so she was not in the kitchen helping like some of the other women were.
“I found a job I’m good at.” I paused to give her a long, doubtful look, knowing what her background was. Her smile turned into a giggle. “Oh, come on, honey! I can tell what you’re thinking by your look. Do you really think I’d be doing that here? I doubt these guys have a nickel between them, and besides, some of them don’t look like they bathe regularly.”
My jaw dropped with shock, and then I slowly realized that she was joking. “You’re terrible!” I chuckled.
“Had you going, didn’t I,” she nudged me in the shoulder. “That life is behind me, honey, you know that, and besides, I have Clay now. The man’s a God and a sex machine in bed. All you have to do is drop in a quarter and he just keeps going and going like The Energizer Bunny.”
I rolled my eyes. “So, what are you doing to help out?”
“I’ve been helping out with the little ones, giving their moms a break, bringing them food and drinks, I even changed one of the babies.” Once again, I paused to give her a stunned look. “I know! Who would have thought that I liked children? But I find that I do.”
“Wow. Maybe being here is going to be good for you. Maybe it will show you that there’s more to a relationship than sex.” I was cutting up celery now. “I’d like to see you happy and settled down.”
It grew quiet between us for a minute, and I knew that Jasmine was thinking about her past. She’d often stated that no man would want an ex-prostitute for a wife, much less for the mother of his children. Usually self-assured and vibrant, that was the one thing she let hold her back. She was convinced that she was tainted and didn’t deserve to find that kind of happiness.
“Stop it,” I said, tossing some cherry tomatoes into the huge bowl. “Stop thinking negative thoughts. We shape our own lives, honey, but you have to fight for what you want. If something isn’t working--” I instantly thought about my crappy life with Paul, “then you change it.” I gave her a meaningful look. “You know that.” She released a sigh and nodded. “So, you like Clay a lot, huh?”
Her face lit up. “Yeah, for some strange reason I do. It started out as just sex, but I don’t know . . .” She shrugged. “He’s different from any man I’ve ever met. Rough, controlling, intense.” She halted for a minute, as if thinking about what she wanted to say. “And he’s annoying as hell, but he gets to me. He makes me feel . . .” She paused, searching for the right word. “Special.”
I grinned. “Are you in love with him?”
Her expression immediately fell. “No! What? No way! It’s too damned soon for that.” She made a tisking sound. “Where did that come from? Gee, slow down, girl.”
“Okay, okay,” I laughed, cutting up some carrots. She was right. She and Clay hadn’t been together long enough for it to have turned into something more serious. He wasn’t exactly the kind of man you brought home to the family, but if Jasmine was happy, that was all that mattered.
I thought about Big John. The same could be said about him, but there was absolutely nothing between us. One session of smoking hot sex didn’t a relationship make. I wasn’t even sure what there was between us, other than that one moment when we have given in to what had been building between us since we’d met. Maybe now that the sexual tension had been worked out he’d be done trying to intimidate me with his intense, smoldering looks.
Yeah, he hadn’t been intimidating me.
He’d been staking a claim.
And I’d liked it.
I wasn’t sure how I felt about that now that I’d let him have me so easily.
Whew! I was getting warm just thinking about the big man. I tossed the carrots into the salad, staring down into the bowl to see if it was missing anything. If it had been up to me I would have added onions, radishes, and mushrooms, but there were children who would be sharing the salad. A pile of cucumber, celery, carrots, cheese squares, and sweet dried cranberries sat on a huge mound of lettuce. I picked up the tongs to mix everything together.
“How’s the salad coming?” Hawk’s wife, Audra, called from across the kitchen. She was removing a huge sheet of garlic bread from the oven.
“All done,” I smiled back at her. “Jasmine, can you get the salad dressings out of the fridge?”
“Sure.”
“We’ll bring the salad out first,” Allie chirped in, straining one of many colanders of spaghetti in a different sink on the other side of the room next to the stove. “Otherwise they’ll fall on the spaghetti like vultures and the salad will go to waste.”
Several laughs echoed through the huge kitchen. I was getting good at learning who the main women of the club were. Carol, whose only connection to the club was that she was Audra’s friend, had already taken out the bowls, plates, and silverware. Then there were Trish, Michelle, and Robin, who were wives of some of the club members. All of the ladies were sweet and easy going, the complete opposites of their spouses. Jasmine and I had already been invited to one of their girls’ nights out and a spa day. Michelle had suggested that it be at my salon, but I didn’t offer all the amenities they were looking for. Besides, who wanted spa day in their own place of work? I could do that anytime.
“Drinks are all set up.” Trish breezed through the swinging door from the restaurant.
“So are all the kids,” Robin added coming in right behind her. “Babies are strapped and locked into their highchairs, sippy cups in place.”
“Oh, and Clay and Big John have returned.” Trish shot me a wink.
Why did she give me a wink? Why not Jasmine? Jasmine and Clay were an item. I glanced at Jasmine, who was quickly exiting the kitchen with a kind of girlish excitement that made me smile in spite of it. Well, I wasn’t about to go out there running to Big John. I may have caught my breath at the sound of his name, my heart may have thumped a little harder in my chest, but not enough for me to make a fool of myself over that man. It was too soon for that.
The stupidity of that last thought wasn’t lost on me.
“Ready for the salad to go out?” I asked no one in particular.
“Yep.” Audra was the one who answered. “We’ll come back for the rest of the food when it’s time.”
One by one we filed out of the kitchen, and I brought up the rear with the huge bowl. I went directly to where the food was going to be set up. The ladies had done a nice job of fixing up a buffet style display, which seemed to work best for the amount of people present. As I made my way to the table I spied Jasmine and Clay, hand in hand, leaving the restaurant towards the direction of the bar. Their expressions revealed how captivated they were with each other, and it was clear that they were in a hurry to find a private corner somewhere for a more private welcome. Without being too obvious, I scanned the restaurant in search of Big John.
I tried not to feel hurt that he had not sought me out. After all, I was staying in his room. But I didn’t expect anything from the moody enforcer. I set the bowl down and turned to head back to the kitchen, halting abruptly when I pushed through the door to see Big John leaning against the counter, ankles crossed, looking all big and dangerous as he chugged down a beer. My heart jolted as our eyes clashed, and I felt a welcoming smile spread across my lips.
I took a deep breath to steady my nerves.
“Hi.”
He lowered the bottle. “Hi.”
He always wore such an intense expression. I swallowed. He appeared worn and dusty, as if he’d just come home from a hard day’s work. His hair was tussled, the sun lines on the weathered skin of his face appeared deeper than they had before he’d left. It was a look that was sexy as hell on him. “Thirsty?”
Without looking, he reached behind him and set the bottle of beer down onto the counter and then straightened. I didn’t miss the way that his gaze moved over me in a lazy way that made my pulse jump. I caught my breath, suddenly feeling overwhelmed by his presence. He reminded me of a predator sizing up his next meal.
Or a lion picking up on the scent of a mate in heat.
He nodded at my question, and then slowly made his way toward me. “And hungry.” Before I knew what was happening, his hands were sinking deep into my hair and he was jerking me against him until we were flush. “Been thinking about this,” he growled, lowering his head and covering my mouth with his.
What began as a soft touch of the lips quickly turned into a deeper connection that signaled the intensity of our feelings for each other. It wasn’t love, no, it was physical. Something basic and raw, all-consuming. I came alive the instant our tongues thrust against each other and danced in an age-old battle that fueled other wants and needs within our cores. Big John was already hard, and he was grinding his cock against my lower belly as if he were a randy teenager trying to get off. I moaned low, welcoming the wildfire that was surging through me, hoping that my submission would encourage him to do whatever he wanted. He responded to our increasing arousal with a deep groan, letting his hands slide down my back to cup my butt.
I dropped my hands to his bulging biceps, clenching into the unyielding muscle. His large hands squeezed my ass, lifting me up until his cock was level with my pussy. I wrapped my legs around him and instantly arched into his huge erection, remembering how he had filled me, suddenly wanting nothing more than for him to be inside of me again. I’d never reached this level of need so quickly before with any other man, and from just a single kiss. It frightened me.
It took my breath away.
I finally had to pull away so that I could catch my breath. But Big John didn’t let me go far, keeping me up against him. I was aware of his arousal as we panted harshly against each other, our mouths just inches apart. I met the intense need in his dark eyes and saw the rough stamp of desire that was controlling his expression. My heart was pounding, my blood racing. It would have been so easy to forget where we were, but the bright lights of the kitchen prevented me from doing that.
“I think we’d better slow down,” I said unnecessarily, and, if I were being honest, reluctantly.
“This is slow for me,” he growled. “And don’t think where we are will stop me from fucking you.” I raised my brows at his explicit admission. “Just a warning, baby. For the future.”
The future? That sounded encouraging, yet caused immediate doubts to enter in my head. What each of us wanted for our futures might be very different. I’d heard talk about him, some of the old ladies had carefully offered up tidbits to me, and I was sure that they’d meant them as a warning. Big John had always been a loner unless he was spending time with one of his brothers or being entertained by one of the sweetbutts, and he’d preferred it that way. So his fascination with me, a civilian, had come as a surprise to everyone in the club.
Before I could comment, he was brushing my mouth lightly with his again, drawing a whimper of need from me. Our pelvises were still grinding against each other and I shivered as his cock rubbed over my clit mercilessly. I leaned back. The smirk on Big John’s face revealed that he knew how he was affecting me. He was torturing me with a promise that he knew he couldn’t possibly deliver considering that anyone could walk in on us at any time.
In retaliation of pure frustration, I leaned forward and buried my teeth into the area where his neck and shoulder met. I didn’t break skin, but I knew it was hard enough to hurt. His grunt sounded loudly throughout the kitchen, and he pulled away sharply to meet my eyes. Eyes dilated, nostrils flaring, teeth bared, he sucked in a breath. It was not the reaction I’d been expecting. His expression looked positively feral, and in a move that seemed too quick for a man his size, he crowded me back against the fridge.
“Oh, little girl, that was a big mistake.” Unexplainably I laughed at his rumbling threat. “You think this is funny?” My amusement fled instantly when I felt Big John’s hand at the front of my jeans. What was he going to do? “You don’t know me yet, but you’re going to learn who I am fast.” He expertly undid the snap and zipper. “You’re going to learn what I like. And I like pain, baby.” My eyes rounded when he parted the material and slipped his hand down into the front of my pants. “Pain is a sure-fire way of getting me to attack this pussy.” Without warning, his finger parted my folds and slipped inside.
“Oh!” I cried out, burying my face against his shoulder to drown out the sound. Big John didn’t play around. His finger went in deep, pulled out to the tip, and then sank back inside. His thumb stroked against my swollen clit, and not softly, either. It was clear that his roughness was a sort of punishment for my biting him, but it was a chastisement that electrified me. I’d never associated pleasure with pain, but the sharp sting of his fingers made me wet and hot between my legs.
It didn’t occur to me to protest. My whole body jerked with a sharp, pleasant reaction as he finger-fucked me with a rough lack of control. My hips moved in rhythm with his thrusts, and when Big John curled those thick digits against my G-spot I exploded around him. I threw my head back against the fridge and convulsed, thankful as he took that moment to swallow my cries with a grinding, wet kiss.
Ohmygod! Ohmygod! Ohmygod! I chanted to myself every time I convulsed against Big John’s hand. His fingers were still buried inside me, his thumb pressing against my clit. I saw stars behind my closed eyes. I was satisfied and mortified at the same time. We were in the kitchen, where anyone could have come in, and still could, yet I couldn’t find the strength to care. Gradually his kisses grew tender, matching the calm that was moving over us, until we stilled against one another and the only thing left was the sound of our breathing.
“Jesus,” I breathed softly. “I can’t believe we just did that here in the kitchen.” I slowly lowered my legs when I realized that they were still around Big John’s waist. His fingers slipped out of my body, and he dragged his wet hand out of my pants. As I busied myself by doing up my pants, he held his hand up, letting me see that it was coated with my release. I felt my cheeks grow hot. “If someone had walked in−”
He smirked, satisfaction in his eyes, even though he still had an impressive hard-on pressing against his zipper. “No one did.”
“I’m too old for this kind of juvenile thing.”
Big John scoffed. “Baby, you’re never too old to enjoy sex.”
I quickly corrected him. “I don’t mean sex, I mean sex in the kitchen when there’s a hundred people just outside that door.”
“That’s what makes it feel so good.” God, he was right, but I wasn’t going to admit it to him. I’d never thought that I was the kind of person who would find it thrilling to do something so illicit when I could have gotten caught so easily.
As we stood staring at each other, Big John brought his hand up to his mouth, and my jaw dropped as he proceeded to suck my cream off his fingers. A mini-orgasm raked through my body, and fresh wetness soaked my panties. It was hot, and in a heartbeat he’d managed to turn me on again without half-trying. The man had magical powers, that had to be it. Well, why not?
He had the body of a God.