Every part of me shook and shivered from the cold. The shock of icy water left my head aching and my body freezing, particularly since Evershaw tried to drown me under the shower. I ground my teeth until bright spots danced in front of my eyes and it didn’t help alleviate my rage. That insufferable ass. He’d stormed in there and manhandled me like I was one of his wolves, like I was someone to just order around—and when that didn’t work, he shoved me. Shoved me.

Henry looked uncomfortable, lingering near the door, while Mercy bounced on her toes as she searched for fresh sweats and underwear in the dresser. The medic studied the burns on my legs with an odd expression. “I’ve never seen anything like that, young lady.”

“My name is Deirdre,” I muttered. “And it’s never happened to me before, so your guess is as good as mine on what caused it.”

“You were doing magic,” Mercy said, breathing the words reverently.

I shivered and hugged the towel more tightly around me. I just wanted the men to leave so I could strip off the sodden clothes and get the dry ones on, then I could try to sleep at least a little bit before... Well, before I had to sit in that room and think about how to save the complete asshole who dumped me in the shower.

At least I’d knocked him down. I took a great deal of satisfaction in remembering the stupid look on his face when his ass hit the tile.

Henry scratched at his jaw and yawned as the medic finished evaluating the burns, and the older man retreated with a nod in my direction and the general acknowledgment that he’d be back in five or so hours to make sure everything still looked like it was healing okay. Which left me with Mercy and Henry, both of them staring at me expectantly.

And my teeth kept chattering.

Mercy’s head tilted as she held out dry sweats. “You should change. Aren’t you cold?”

“I’m f-f-freezing,” I muttered. I frowned in Henry’s direction. “But I’m not about to strip down in front of... everyone.”

A slow flush climbed Henry’s face and he grumbled a bit as he turned his back. “I wouldn’t have looked. I’m not stupid and I don’t fancy getting my ass kicked.”

“What does that mean?” I dropped the towel, stripped off the T-shirt and underwear that still clung to me, and reached for the dry clothes. I wasn’t jazzed about dropping trou in front of Mercy, but it was at least a small victory that the guy wasn’t going to see me altogether. “I hardly think I could kick your ass, not half-drowned and maybe a quarter of your size.”

He snorted and Mercy giggled again, and she searched for some big fluffy socks to cover my feet. I eased the panties and shorts on gingerly, not wanting to drag the ointment all over, and wrapped my hair up in the towel after pulling on shirt and sweatshirt for a few extra layers.

Henry sighed. “I’m not worried about you, witch.”

“Then what’s the problem? If I don’t kick your ass, who would?” I sat on the couch to pull on the socks, not looking at him. “And you can turn around. Thank you for being a gentleman.”

Mercy practically beamed, going up on her toes. “Well, since you brought it up, it’s very interesting that the—“

“Stop.” Henry’s voice cracked into the quiet like a whip, and Mercy jumped like she’d been goosed.

I looked between them, trying to read into the laden looks they traded, and felt like I was missing something important. Mercy scowled and turned down the bed, ignoring Henry. “It seems kind of strange that the alpha knew about you being burned, though. How do you suppose that happened?”

My stomach unbalanced. I didn’t want to think about that. The implications... I shivered again. “I don’t know.”

“Really?” She glanced at me sideways, her tone turning wheedling instead of straightforward. “Are you sure? Seems kind of odd that Evershaw, out of everyone here, would realize you were in trouble.”

“It’s probably nothing,” Henry said. He scowled at Mercy and made a shooing gesture. “Go. Finish up.”

“We’re finished,” she said. My eyes narrowed as I studied them both. Mercy grinned brightly and pointed me to the bed. “Time to get some rest, witchy witch.”

I folded my arms over my chest. “Hold on. What the hell is going on?”

Henry took a pillow from the couch and tossed it onto the floor near the door. “Nothing is going on. Everyone is getting some sleep. Mercy, shut your trap and lie down. Deirdre, it’s fine.”

It wasn’t fine. Something certainly wasn’t fine. But I didn’t want to think too hard about why Evershaw felt the burning on his legs at the same time that I did. He hadn’t shown any evidence of it, though, at least where I could see. I rather spitefully wished he got covered in boils and blisters, since the man was a complete tool.

I shuffled toward the bed as my legs dragged like lead weights, and pulled the towel from my hair so I could lay it on the sheets to protect them from the ointment. Mercy and Henry continued to argue in voices too low for me to overhear, so I put a pillow over my face and tried to think my way through the mess I’d made of my life.

Maybe the geas Smith used to bind me to Evershaw’s life had not been only a one-way connection. What if Smith created instead a two-way bond, where Evershaw felt what I did and I suffered as he did? It seemed like I got the short end of the stick there, since there was a whole city of people who wanted Evershaw dead. I hadn’t thought of any enemies recently other than Smith, so Evershaw was in the clear for people trying to kill me.

I wanted to roll over and sleep on my stomach, but my legs ached and tingled as the numbing agent wore off. I’d never had a scrying go so badly wrong; I’d never even heard of such a thing, where the water and the flame combined to burn the caster. And it wasn’t as though I had a lot of witches I could turn to for support or advice.

The thought made me feel very alone. I missed my mother desperately with a sharp pain, and my eyes burned with tears as I squeezed them shut even under the pillow. What the hell was going on? The coven drained me dry as often as they could, and I’d made a deal with the ErlKing that not only backfired but got me linked to a shapeshifter, and my scrying had gone completely wonky and there wasn’t anyone else to ask.

I shook with the effort it took not to collapse into a puddle of tears; only the presence of the two wolves in the room kept me from falling apart completely. They’d fallen silent, though I didn’t know if that was because they wanted to sleep or because they’d heard me start to lose my shit. I didn’t look the gift wolf in the mouth and instead just accepted the peace and quiet. My thoughts swirled and scattered, but the urge to cry only strengthened.

Maybe I could hide in the bathroom and muffle the sobs in another towel, since the pillow didn’t feel dense enough to do a good job of stifling my grief. It made me miss my cat even more, since he always knew when I was sad and would have curled up on my head and the pillow, regardless of my wet hair, to push his paws against my scalp.

And when I thought I would burn to death, the one thing on earth I’d miss the most was my cat.

I dragged my knees up to press the pillow even harder against my face, wrapping my arms around both, and shook with sobs. The coven wouldn’t care. The coven would only notice when they tried a complicated spell and it didn’t work. No one else would show up at the house to check on me or figure out where I’d gone. No one cared if I disappeared or not. No one would even notice.

I didn’t often let myself feel sorry about everything that had disappeared out of my life, and I never took much time to mourn what I’d lost. It felt too indulgent. Especially when there wasn’t anyone else to do the work, I couldn’t afford to sit around and wallow. I had bills to pay. The electric bill came the same time every month whether I’d dragged myself to work enough to pay it or not. So I put my head down and focused on putting one foot in front of the other.

And look where I ended up. Kidnapped and detained, compelled by the ErlKing, alone and burned and without any real options. There wasn’t a way to keep putting one foot in front of the other while under Evershaw’s thumb. I couldn’t push down my fear and anger in order to keep working on something else. All the misery of the past year stared right back at me inside my eyelids.

It welled up and threatened to drown me, but there wasn’t any way to keep it back. I wailed into the pillow and burrowed under the blankets and sheets to try and suffer in silence despite the sobs. I prayed the wolves were asleep and not just sitting there listening to me suffer. It would have been less humiliating if I’d been alone.

I wished the medic had something to numb the pain in my heart, since my legs seemed to be doing just fine.