We’ve been flying seven hours, heading to Miami where we’ll stop to fuel up. It’s been a long flight, vacant of any cheer or conversation. We’ve done this trip without Alec before, when he’d been on tour and we’d already seen Locked Tight perform in a couple cities.

During those stints Jack and I would go to Ibiza to relax and pass the time. Or Santorini. Or Belize. One year we even went to Alaska and froze our asses off to see the glaciers melting. It was more sobering than fun, so we never went again.

I returned and donated a hefty chunk of change to Earth Justice, after researching them of course.

Even if their records didn’t have the transparency they proved to have had, I might have chosen them just because of their kickass slogan: Because The Earth Needs A Good Lawyer.

I didn’t tell Jack I did that.

Not because I was sure he’d object, but because I wasn’t sure what he’d do. And I didn’t want to argue about Global Warming and whether or not it was happening. If Jack had argued the opposite stance, I would have had one more reason to be disappointed in my brother.

I pick my battles.

Even though I’ve never been more disappointed in Jack than I am today, my hands aren’t clean. I could have been firmer. I could have been more sympathetic.

I could have… what? I don’t know.

But this gnawing sensation in my stomach is telling me there must have been something I could have done. And now I’m playing the fun replay game, every moment since we got the news from Henderson, going over and over in my mind as I search for what I could have done differently.

This flight is going to be a blast.

Without glancing over to me, Jack grumbles, “You’re quiet.”

I pause from tapping my fingers on the leather armrest. “Not really. It’s usually you and Alec who are doing most of the talking, so it just seems like that without him here.”

He winces; target hit.

“Did you talk to him before he took off?”

“No.”

“Did he call you?”

“No.”

“Text?”

“Jack,” I sigh, exasperated.

His lips tighten and he holds his tongue. But that doesn’t last as long as I’d like it to.

“Hey.”

I hit the armrest hard. “What?!”

He turns his head and meets my impatience with a look that stills me. “I fucked up. I want her back.”

I’m too stunned to speak for several seconds. “What, so you can keep playing your games with her? You want to entertain yourself some more since you have nothing better to do with your time?”

Anger flashes behind his eyes and his nostrils flare. “Not again.”

I unbuckle my seat and head for the liquid patience to my left. Opening up the shelves, my body jerks with an unexpected blast of turbulence. “Whoa.” Gripping the bar, I look over my shoulder at Jack. “What was that?”

“A handshake from the devil,” Jack mutters dryly, unaffected by the jolt. His head bobs as another hits, this one making the bile rise to the back of my throat. Jack glances in my direction and to humor me, hits the button on his chair. “Terence?”

The pilot’s voice sounds through the speakers, “Mr. Stone, it’s just a little bad weather, but it’d be best if you both buckle up.”

I walk quickly back to my chair, my heart beating a little faster. I’ve always hated turbulence. Jack seems to not give a shit about it, ever.

“No, I don’t want her back for that. Something happened to me today.” He stares ahead and inhales deeply. “She almost died in my arms, and I thought…”

Another jolt of turbulence hits us. “Holy shit! Fucking cut it out, Terence!” I yell toward the closed cockpit door. There’ve been too many small planes like this plummeting into mountains for me to chastise myself about my paranoia. I’m not an idiot. We’re flying miles in the air and how exactly is that possible? No amount of explaining aerodynamics will ever convince me that this isn’t a miracle susceptible to flaws.

Jack holds my look, asking silently if I’m done freaking out, before he continues, “And maybe I want to mess with her a little still, but only because she rises to the bait.” He smiles with brotherly mischief that would normally have me relaxing, but not after today.

“Jack. You asked Alec to ruin her heart!”

His eyes flash defensively and his jaw ticks. “I said I fucked up.”

Another jolt and the plane bobs down making even Jack’s eyes widen momentarily.

Fueled by my fear, I yell at him, not holding back anymore, “You fucked up? What you did was downright malicious if not evil! You deserved Alec punching you in the face. If I weren’t strapped down right now, I’d–” The plane jerks again and my stomach dips into a vortex of motion sickness. “Ugh,” I groan, rolling my eyes toward the windows, the charcoal gray ominous clouds giving me chills. To my horror, a flash of light followed by a thunder-clap explodes while I watch. “Shit. Did you see that? We’re in the middle of a lightning storm!”

Terence’s voice sounds over the speakers, this time with more urgency, “If you’re not buckled up, do so now. It’s getting hairy.” The silence that follows is unnerving.

I look to Jack, completely forgetting my outburst until I see his face. He leans over and snaps, “I’m trying to fucking apologize! What do you want from me?”

Another crack of thunder and the room lights up with a bright flash.

“I want you to apologize to them!”

“I will! They’re just not here right now, are they?!”

“And whose fault is that?”

“Jesus, Sean. It must be hard to live up on that pedestal. Why don’t you come down and breathe human air for a change?” He glares at me. A jolt throws us to the right, the low seat belts cutting into our waists. My teeth clang against each other painfully and I stare at the flashing jagged strikes outside. Jack’s got a deep line piercing the bruise above his nose. “He’s a great pilot. We’re going to be fine.”

I glance to him, surprised by the fear I heard in his voice. Another terrifying dip and my knuckles go the color of bone, gripping the armrest. “Holy shit. Has it ever been this bad before?”

Grimly, Jack shakes his head a little, his attention on the swaying plane. Another jolt and we dip forward. Jack slams his palm against the button. “What’s going on?!!” No answer. “Terence!”

Urgency edges into the response. “Lightning hit us! We’re going down! Prepare for a water landing.”

“What?!!” I shout. Looking to my brother for hope, he turns his head to meet my eyes, his overflowing with fear, shock, resignation and some sort of superhuman strength. Our fight evaporates. Everything that’s ever happened disintegrates instantly as the plane begins to shake. The pilot is fighting to keep it from nose-diving and our fight seems petty all of a sudden.

In life I’ve always been the empath, knowing what people needed sometimes before even they did. I’m the one they talk to, our friends and family.

But Jack? He’s always been the badass.

He’s always kicked the ass that needed kicking.

He’s always been the one who never lets it get to him. And right now I need him to kick the shit out of my terror. “Are we going to die?”

The plane plummets forward. Jack yells over the rattling, “Get your life vest!” He motions to my seat and bends to yank out the yellow plastic beneath his own.

I whisper, “Oh my God,” as oxygen masks fall from the ceiling. Jack and I put on the vests, fastening the belts and pulling the red cord to inflate them.

They both explode with air.

The ache in my ears from the cabin pressure strips away my ability to think.

Grabbing for the oxygen mask and missing as it swings away from me, I look over to Jack and see him staring at me like this is it.

With everything clattering around us and pillows flying through the air, he’s calm.

“Sean.” I couldn’t hear him, but I saw his lips move and I know his voice as though it were my own. The look on his face cuts through my frantic mind and I relax. A peace comes over me as I look into my brother’s eyes. As we race toward the Atlantic, the air in the cells of my body slows down.

I reach out to him, the oxygen masks flapping around our heads. He grabs my hand and we clasp tightly.

I tell him, the guy who drives me the most crazy out of anyone else in the entire world, “I love you, too.”

We hit the water with such force that our hands tear apart.