Chapter Twenty-Six
Jake
Good Lord, but what in the hell had gotten into me? I was asking her what we were doing about our relationship or lack thereof? I was the one bringing this infamous conversation up? Me??? Someone who never would have ever, in a million years, brought up this conversation. Usually I was trying to dodge it, trying to avoid committing to anyone while I still tried to figure out a way to continue having sex with them.
Maybe this was karma coming back to bite me right in my stupid ass.
Whatever it was, this girl had messed me up something fierce—that much was sure. Usually, I ran away from discussions about titles and what happened after I had sex with someone. Usually, I was the one who never wanted to see the woman again. But something was different with Summer. Something was different and whatever that different was, it had landed me right on my ass.
“I’m not really sure what we’re doing,” she’d responded with an innocent smile that hid a less than innocent mind. The woman knew exactly what she was doing—driving me to madness! “But I think we’re headed in two different directions,” she’d added. “I’m not sure where I’m going or what I’m doing after the summer ends.”
The summer. I’d completely forgotten about the fact that she was only here for a limited amount of time. It wasn’t like she’d planned to move to Springhill permanently, and what was more, I didn’t know if Brady would have wanted her to stay longer than the summer.
As soon as that thought entered my head I pushed it away—it was clear that Brady had a soft spot for Summer and she was an absolute help to Rue. If she’d wanted to stay, I was more than sure neither one of them would put up a fight. In fact, they’d welcome her with open arms. And I would have too.
“So you’re for sure leaving after the summer ends?” I asked.
“That was always the plan,” she answered.
“Where will you go? Back home?”
She cocked her head to the side and then shook it. “No, I can’t go home.”
“Then where?”
“I don’t know,” she answered and then sighed. I was surprised that she said she couldn’t go home but I also didn’t want to push the subject. I figured she’d tell me if she wanted to. Hopefully when she wanted to.
“Then that’s it?” I asked, not able to keep the dejected tone from my voice.
She inhaled deeply. “As much as I’d like to say it isn’t it,” she started.
“You can’t,” I finished for her. Then I nodded. “I get it and I understand.” I smiled at her and patted her thigh, to let her know I didn’t expect anything more from her than what she could give me.
It’s better this way, I thought to myself. If she leaves then you’ll be able to move on and get over her. You won’t be stuck feeling like a lovesick puppy all the time. You’ll get back to being the man you’re used to being.
And there was some level of reassurance and relief in that thought.
Before I knew it, she’d changed the subject and was now saying we had to get back to the ranch before anyone suspected anything. So we headed home. I couldn’t say I was in a very good mood either. All I could think about was the fact that in a couple of months, she’d be gone. Summer would be out of my life and chances were that I’d never see her again.
And that was a thought that left me feeling hollow and empty.
***
It had been an hour ago that we’d had the conversation about her moving. And now, the moon was shining brightly through my window as I lay on my bed, hands behind my head, watching it track across the sky.
I’d tried to sleep after dropping Summer at the door and kissing her goodnight, but all I’d been able to think about was the way that woman twisted me up. She was so hot and honest and vulnerable all at the same time. Brady was going to kill me when he found out that I’d disobeyed him and followed the interests of my less sophisticated brain instead.
Even now, I knew I should leave her alone, but I just couldn’t. She’d gotten under my skin and after I’d had a taste of her... well, there was no walking away from her at that point, even if it pissed Brady off. Hopefully he wouldn’t can me over it.
There was something about Summer’s vulnerability that called to my own. She’d touched a place that I avoided at all costs and yet a pair of curious eyes had opened me up like I was a damned book. I sighed and closed my eyes. I was starting to get a lot more comfortable with my own feelings and talking about them and my past. That was a realization that stunned me because in general I avoided talking about my past with most everyone. Even Brady didn’t know much.
What was I going to do about her? She didn’t plan on staying at the ranch; it was clearly a stopover to another life. A life like the one she’d come from. One that was a million miles from mine.
All of this was going to come to a screeching halt and then I’d be left behind. And that was a thought that troubled me more than I could say. This was the reason why I never got involved with women. They were too much trouble, too much of a risk and I was better off alone. Sure, women were good for sex, but I hadn’t had a serious girlfriend for a long time. Not after the last one had screwed me so bad. After that, I’d decided I was just fine as the loner cowboy. It was a shirt that fit me real good.
Until now.
I opened my eyes and stared at the moon as I tried to figure out when the hell I’d handed my balls over to that damned woman. Furthermore, she was the one who’d lost her virginity to me! And yet, she seemed to be as calm as a cucumber while I couldn’t get her out of my flipping mind!
I sighed and sat up. I needed to knock this shit off right now. That girl was going to get me in a heap of trouble, and not just with Brady. The last thing I wanted to deal with was a broken heart. I needed to let her alone so she could get her feet under her and move on with her life. I got up and took a shower. No point in waiting any longer for morning to come. Sleep had eluded me for the night apparently.
By the time I got outside, the moon had set and the sun was pinking up the sky. Brady was already moving cattle around and I caught him by the fence. “You’re clearly feeling better?” I asked.
He grumbled something which I translated to a “Yes, I’m fine.” But he was still limping.
“What was all that with Rue yesterday?” I asked. I’d been meaning to talk to him about it for a while now.
He grunted and waved a hand for me to grab a bale of hay. I did and followed him, waiting for his answer. We fed the cows in silence but I wasn’t going to ask him again. He was the most damned stubborn man I knew. But there was also something serious in the set of his jaw and he didn’t run errands with Rue in general, so I knew something was up.
“Damned doctor wanted to run some tests.”
I folded up the baling twine and tossed it in the metal trashcan. “Wow, you actually went to see Doc? Consider me shocked.”
“Ha ha,” he growled back.
Clearly, he was in a mood but I wasn’t going to back down. Not yet. “What kind of tests?”
He shook his head. “You name it, they ran it. Bunch of stuff showed up in my leg when we went in and it freaked them out. Guess they’ve never seen a cowboy before.”
We were quiet as we walked back to the barn. “Brady, is it serious?”
“You’d think so to listen to those doctors, but I’m fine.” He thumped his chest. “Healthy as a horse.”
I eyed him in disbelief. Brady was like every other cowhand and rancher I’d known my whole life. Not a single one of them liked doctors or medicine. They believed in it for their cows, but if a good vet couldn’t diagnose it, they weren’t interested. I was going to have to ask Rue what was going on because I clearly wasn’t going to get anywhere with Brady.
We worked all morning and I kept an eye on the thunderclouds moving across the sky. We had a ton to do and at some point, we needed to get the guests on horses and push these cattle out.
“We gonna move these tomorrow?” I demanded.
He glanced at the sky and put his hands on his hips. “Boy, I sure want to, but we’re supposed to get hammered again by another damned storm. Not sure Marlene would like driving the cattle in the rain with her high-society ways.”
I laughed. “No. Don’t think she would, but she did come out to try her hand at ranching.”
“True,” Brady answered as he cocked his head. Then he turned to face me. “What’s your girl up to today?”
My back tensed. “My what?”
He snorted and walked toward the house. “Don’t give me that. You think I’m blind? I’ve been watching you.”
I looked away and dropped back so I didn’t have to meet his hard gaze. “I’m sure Summer’s helping Rue.”
“Talk to her after lunch, see if she wants to jump that mare of hers and put on a show for Marlene. Girl’s good.”
That was the strangest request I’d ever heard him make. We never did things around here for show, not ever. Brady had always been very vocal about the fact that this was a working ranch and if people wanted to come here to work, then that’s what they did. “Okay.”
After lunch, I caught up with Summer while she was folding laundry.
“Hey, Posh.” I leaned against the doorjamb and tried to stay cool even though I wanted to kiss the tendrils of hair that had come loose from her ponytail. Goddamn, but I needed to get over this… crush or whatever the hell it was, pronto.
She glanced up and set a fluffy white towel on the stack. “Hey, Scary.”
My gaze roamed over her and I didn’t hide my interest. She ignored me and kept folding laundry. “Brady wanted to know if you’d work Aria this afternoon.”
She frowned and stared at me. “What? Really?”
I shrugged. “Not sure what he’s up to, but we can’t put Marlene and those kids on horses and move the cows yet, owing to the coming storm. I think he’s worried they’re going to be bored.”
She put both hands on the washing machine. “And he wants me to ride?”
I shrugged, like Brady’s request shouldn’t have come as a surprise. “You’re something else, you know that, right?”
She scrunched up her face in that adorable way of hers and then fidgeted. “I guess.”
I stepped into the laundry room and then I couldn’t help it any longer—I had to touch her. I settled my hands on her hips. “You’re an amazing rider and you’re even more amazing to watch.”
She stared straight ahead and I didn’t pressure her for a comment. She leaned into me, her shoulder on my chest. “When?”
I lifted my fingers to her neck and massaged the cords of her muscles. “He and I have to work on the baler all afternoon, so anytime you want.”
“What are you two up to in here?” Rue barreled into the room with an armload of sheets, startling us both and sending Summer scuttling away.
“Oh, um, nothing,” Summer responded right away while I shook my head at her to let her know she was anything but stealthy.
Rue shoved me out of the room. “You two are going to steam up my dry laundry.”
I moved back to the door and gave her a wide grin. “Well, we wouldn’t want that to happen!”