Rosa
I’m flying high. So high. But Javier has me in his solid, protective arms. I don’t even care that Iker can see bare parts of me. All I care about is Javier. I want—no, I need—him inside of me. My body physically aches for this.
“Please,” I beg as I shamelessly grind against his hard cock through his trunks. “Make love to me.”
He chuckles, the sound deep and dark. “In front of Iker?”
“Yes,” I moan. “I don’t care. I just want you.”
His fingers feel like silk as he tugs away the strings on my back, freeing me of my top. I slide my body against his naked chest, enjoying the way my breasts feel smashed against him.
“Iker’s cock is pierced,” Javier taunts. “Sure it isn’t his young cock you want inside of you instead?”
“Just yours,” I plead, my fingers clawing desperately at his shorts. I manage to yank them down and free him. We both groan when I sink down on his thickness.
“What if another man fucks you?” Javier demands, his fingers biting deliciously into my hips. “What happens?”
I rock up and down on him, my fingers tangling in his hair. “You’ll kill him.”
He grabs hold of my hair and yanks back, baring my throat to him. “I’ll kill you too if I have to.” His finger slides between my pussy lips and he massages my clit. “Will I have to kill you too?”
“I won’t fuck another man,” I vow. “I swear, Javier. Only you.”
He pinches my clit and sucks on my throat hard. Stars dance around me as he owns me completely. I come with a shriek, uncaring of those around me, and groan when his heat fills me up. His kisses on my neck are possessive. He’s marking me over and over again. I let him because I want everyone to see I’m his.
But your job?
In this moment, I don’t fucking care.
He pulls me closer and I curl against him, seeking his comfort. His fingers lazily stroke my spine as he kisses my hair. I’m safe with him. Safe with a monster. It doesn’t make sense.
I drift off but wake to discover we’re moving. I’m wrapped in a towel as Javier walks us through his cold house. He’s gentle with me as he dries me off once in his room and helps me into bed. And I fall asleep with my monster bucking inside of me, owning me even as I chase sleep.
He’s completely taken over.
And I’m not sure I’m even unhappy about that.
I’ve never felt so alive.
I’m an idiot.
Oh my God.
I fucked Javier in front of everyone at the party last night. Got high. Took drugs. Did everything the CIA would shit over if they found out. Then, like every night, I let Javier come inside me. So many times. I’m so deeply fucked I don’t even know what to do anymore.
I need focus.
Thank goodness it’s Saturday.
I can meet with Michael and stop my world from spinning. Seeing him will remind me of my job. Of my freaking duty.
I’d slipped out while Javier dined with his family. He thinks Michael is my ex but still my friend. Saturdays used to be my day off and Javier knows I promised to have dinner with Michael. I'm not sure how much longer he'll be okay with me spending Saturdays away from him to run off to see my ex, so I do what I can while I can. While he was distracted feeding Emiliano grapes, I left the estate and took off to the hotel.
My thoughts are a jumbled mess. Last night, I’d been nervous. I was meeting the big dog. Yoet Estrada. It was such a pivotal moment. I needed him to trust me as well. But then he was just an older version of Javier. Handsome and friendly. His wife was sweet and their son was adorable. It was hard defining who was the bad guy exactly. If anything, I wanted those people to like me. To think I was good enough to be at Javier’s side.
Spinning and spinning.
I’m losing my mind.
Is this how my mother felt when she got wrapped up with my father? My mom was good and gentle. My father was a crazy gangster who somehow hooked my mother. I was made from love. Despite everything my father was into, he loved my mother.
My heart aches as I slip into the hotel. I go through my usual checks and find myself standing in front of the same hotel room as last time. I’m nervous. What if Michael can tell how far I’ve slipped in just a week’s time? Swiping my palms on my light pink summer dress, I try to steady my nerves. Oddly enough, when I touch the dainty diamond bracelet Javier gave me, it calms me.
This morning, he spent the early hours lazily kissing me between my thighs. I’d come several times until I was too sensitive to take it anymore. Then, he just held me down and forced one more orgasm on me before sliding his cock into me. I’d been so dizzied and addicted to him I nearly decided to forgo coming to see Michael.
“If you don’t show up, we’ll assume you’ve been made. We’ll be forced to come for you.”
The very thought of agents busting into Javier’s home, scaring little Emiliano, had me dragging out of bed with new resolve. The fact I was more concerned about the Estradas than my duties had me snapping out of it.
I have a job.
I need to remember that.
The door opens before I have a chance to knock and Michael stands there not wearing a shirt. My eyes, of their own accord, drag down his newly formed man-boobs and rounded stomach. He’s only wearing boxers and his hair is disheveled. His breath reeks of alcohol and his eyes are bloodshot.
“You look like a fucking whore,” he sneers, his eyes raking over my breasts through my shirt. “Is his cum still running out of you?”
I gasp in shock. After a week of being Javier’s queen, I’m stunned at being spoken to so rudely. “Excuse me?”
“Just get inside, Daza,” he snaps.
Glowering at him, I push past him. Saying my last name where others could hear is reckless. I waltz inside and eye the space with disgust. I can’t believe I was deluded into thinking we had something. Looking back, he just used me for sex. We didn’t talk about anything. All I did was hang on his every word while he fucked prostitutes between our visits.
He’s disgusting.
I pick up a folder from the table, but it gets torn from my grip by Michael and shoved in his messenger bag.
“Classified,” he barks. He picks up a bottle of tequila and twists the cap. “What do you want?”
Letting out a sigh, I walk over to the bed and sit down on the edge. “I’m here to give you an update. Like always. It’s Saturday.”
“No shit?” he asks. “I thought you’d run off into the sunset with that fucker. You’re clearly sleeping with him. That much was evident when I saw you with him.”
“You told me to,” I snap back, my fire brimming to the surface. “You said get close to him.”
“You got close all right,” he says as he scratches his balls through his boxers. “Does he make you squeal like a pig, Daza?”
“You’re an asshole when you’re drunk. I’m not putting up with this,” I bite at him as I rise. “Tell Stokes I’ll meet with him via video conference next week. I’ll inform him of my updates.”
As I walk past him, he grabs my bicep, his strong fingers bruising my flesh. “No.”
“Yes,” I hiss at him. “Let me go or I’ll report this. I’ll report all of this.”
He shoves me away from him and I fall to my ass on his bed, the mattress springs squeaking in protest. “You’re not reporting shit.”
I start to rise again when he swings his half-full bottle of tequila at me. It makes contact with the side of my forehead with a loud thunk. I crumple to the bed, my vision blacking out. Blinking away my daze, I rub at the painful spot on my head.
“Michael,” I croak out. “You hit me.”
I try to sit up when his fist cracks against my jaw. I’ve never been so brutally hit before in my entire life. Pain so intense explodes across my face. I start to crawl away, but his fingers bite into my thigh and he drags me down the bed.
“No,” I mutter out. “Stop.”
Everything goes black for a moment and then I blink open my eyes again. I’m jolted awake when my panties get jerked down my thighs.
“Michael,” I cry out. “Stop!”
His knee comes between my thighs and he overpowers me as he pries me apart. I can hear the sound of the foil of a condom ripping.
He’s going to fuck me.
And instead of being worried, all I can think about is Javier.
“No!” I scream at the top of my lungs, clawing at the duvet. “Get away from me!”
I’m silenced when he pushes inside of me. His grip finds my throat and he squeezes. Hot tears roll out of my eyes. This hurts. I can’t move and he’s fucking me like it’s his God-given right to.
Javier will kill me.
He’ll kill both of us.
I give up. All fight bleeds out of my body as I let Michael fuck me. It’s not unlike all the other times. Same position. Same amount of feelings toward me, which are none. Dirty and disgusting. At least I can count on him being quick. And he sheathed his worthless cock.
I wait it out, tears leaking from my eyes, as I wonder how long Javier will let me live. Will he hold me one last time and tell me I’m safe? A loud, ugly sob tears from me as Michael groans. He comes hard and then he’s pulling out of me.
“Fuck!” he curses. “Fuck, Rosa! Why did you fucking make me do that?”
I curl into a ball, my tears soaking the bed. My entire body shudders. “H-He’ll kill us now. L-Look what you did,” I accuse. “Why d-did you d-do that? Michael, why?”
“I don’t know,” he yells back. “I don’t know.” Something shatters against the glass mirror. “I’m fucking sorry, okay? I just missed you. I miss us.”
Sniffling and my jaw aching, I sit up. My head hurts badly. He’s standing on my panties, but I don’t even care. I need to get out of here. Sliding off the bed, I stumble toward the door.
“Where are you going?” he demands, his eyes wild.
“I’m getting away from you,” I shriek. “You’ve ruined everything. We’re both as good as dead. He’ll take us to the shed and gut us, Michael. You did this to us!”
“No,” he bellows as he lunges for me. “He won’t know because you’ll keep your goddamned mouth shut and remember your duty to the motherfucking agency, Daza!”
We slam against the door and it cracks in protest. I scream, kicking at him, but he smashes me against the door with his weight. His grip on my biceps is strong, keeping me locked in place.
“I w-won’t lie t-to him,” I choke out. “Let me go.”
“Will you listen to yourself? You’ve gone fucking crazy over him! You can’t tell him shit, Rosa. He’s a target, not your fucking boyfriend.”
I squirm and spit in his face. He releases my arm to grip my jaw. I’m forced to look at the man whom I trusted for so long. He’s more of a monster than Javier could ever be.
“You won’t tell him,” he hisses.
Bringing my knee up, I hit him hard in the balls. He starts howling and releases me. I rake my nails across his face before twisting the knob and running out the door. He starts after me, but once I exit the side door of the building, I realize he’s not following me.
It’s dark and people loiter about, but I’m not afraid.
I have to get to Javier.
I have to make him understand I didn’t want it.
When I promised I wouldn’t fuck another man, I meant that with every part of my being. Michael may think I’m brainwashed, but I’m not. I may have my duties for the agency, but my body made promises to a man that had nothing to do with anyone else.
Someone catcalls me from a bench, but I ignore them, my feet pounding faster in my sandals. Everything hurts. I just want to find Javier, crawl into his arms, and let him hold me. That’s all I care about right now. I’m almost to the gate when I slam into a man made of solid muscle.
I start screaming and flailing, but he’s too strong for me.
“Calm down,” he hisses. “It’s me.”
Jerking my head up, I lock eyes with Marco Antonio. His irritated stare is gone. He regards me with a mixture of fury and concern.
“I need Javier,” I cry out, falling against him.
He scoops me into his arms and walks through the gate. I curl against him, praying he’ll save me from certain death. It’s an odd feeling being afraid of the one who will no doubt kill you yet craving his comfort at the same time.
The lights inside the house are bright as Marco Antonio carries me in. Upon entering the living room, I get a whiff of strong cigar smoke along with Javier’s and Yoet’s laughter.
“What the fuck?” Javier bellows. A chair scrapes across the floors and then I’m being pulled into his strong, warm embrace.
I scramble to wrap my arms around his neck. My tears that had been falling freely get caught in my throat as I start crying hysterically. Javier’s heartbeat in his chest thunders against me.
“Rosa, what happened?” he demands. He’s barking out orders to his men and it’s all a blur to me. All I care about is him. When he tries to pull me away so he can look at me, I shriek and claw at his neck.
Yoet starts growling at his men and I hear him tell Javier to deal with me. That he’ll take care of it. I cling to Javier. Deal with me how? Take me out back and put a bullet in my skull?
But we don’t go outside.
When I peek out past his neck, I realize we’re in his bathroom. He walks into the shower, turns it on, and then steps back out.
“Manzanita, listen to me,” he says softly. “I cannot help you unless you talk to me.”
Help me?
He eases me to my feet but doesn’t let go. I’m shaking violently and weak. I grasp onto his suit lapels for dear life. Finally, I work up the courage to look at him.
His perfect, handsome face cracks open something deep within me. I want to lock him up in this moment where he thinks I’m beautiful and wonderful. Not in another moment where I admit to him that another man fucked me. He blurs as more tears form.
“Talk to me,” he begs, his voice cracking. “Please.”
“I d-don’t w-want to d-die. I w-want t-to stay w-with you,” I chatter, snot and tears running past my lips.
With his thumb, he swipes away the wetness draining from my nose and kisses my forehead. “Michael hurt you.”
I cough, my sobs making me gasp for air, and buckle in his arms. He steadies me before tilting my chin back up with his knuckles.
“Yes or no, Rosa?”
“Y-Yes.”
His thumb strokes my sore jaw as his eyes skim over my face. “He hit you.”
I nod, my chin wobbling wildly. “D-Don’t kill m-me, Javier.”
Our eyes meet and hate blazes in his gaze. He knows. I don’t have to tell him because he’s clever and figured it out. But I tell him anyway.
“He f-forced me. I didn’t want to,” I whisper and then close my eyes, waiting for the worst. “I didn’t w-want to.”
“Oh, Rosa,” he growls.
I wince as I wait for it to come. The wrath. The fury. A knife. A bullet. His fist. But instead of the worst, he pulls me to him. He strokes my back and hisses violent whispers speaking of revenge and murder.
Not mine.
Michael’s.
And he’s sorry?
“I will skin that motherfucker alive,” he vows. “I didn’t realize you were going, mi amor. I’m so sorry. Lo siento mucho.”
I jerk my head up and our eyes lock. Tenderness and sadness are in his dark brown gaze. “You’re not going to kill me?”
“No, Rosa. I’m going to clean you.”