He could die, Tasha thought dismally, kicking a clump of snow into the tall pine trees. She pivoted on her foot, twirling as best she could in her too-big boots on the frozen ground. The eerie calm of the mountain felt so much like their life in that moment. Frozen, waiting, moving slowly forward; almost there, but not quite. Each day melted a little more, but each fresh snow fall heralded another frozen moment in time. A reprieve. A brief minute where she could catch her breath once more and hang on to this time with her husband. Why did she have to go and ruin it with her silly question?

David always seemed so indomitable that it felt impossible that anything could happen to him. Yet, he’d confirmed as much when he’d said in his business, it was either kill or be killed. He was right, her request had been childish. Thoughtless. Of course, assassins did not just quit their jobs. Murder was a life choice. There could be no going back. What had she been thinking?

She sighed and looked around the idyllic mountain landscape. She could see the peaks of other, higher mountains towering above their isolated, lonely clearing. Such a beautiful place for them to escape to. She wondered again how long David had stayed here before coming after her. It seemed impossible that outside life could intrude on them. And yet, David’s words echoed in her head. Kill or be killed.

With that last grim thought, she turned and made her way back inside, stomping her boots on the porch before going in. Her eyes widened in surprise when she saw he was on a phone talking to someone. As far as she knew, neither of them had spoken on the phone to anyone since arriving at the cabin. She frowned and hovered in the doorway, wondering if she should leave, but he just looked at her, his expression devoid of emotion. When he didn’t wave her away she finished closing the door and simply stood in the door and listened with unabashed curiosity.

David was using his satellite phone since they didn’t have reception any other way. He was mostly listening to the person on the other end, his body tense and motionless.

Tears gathered in her eyes and her mouth felt suddenly dry. Her stomach cramped. A visceral response to what she knew was happening before her eyes. A job. He was being called back to work. She could feel her breakfast churning in her stomach and acid burning her throat. She clamped a hand over her mouth. His sharp eyes tracked the movement. Still his face did not show a single emotion.

“I have been taking care of business up North. Nothing that concerns you,” David said dismissively into the phone, his eyes still pinning her in place.

He paused as he listened.

“It has been taken care of.” His tone was so sinister Natasha shivered in response.

Another pause.

“I’ll be clear to move again when I am needed. I am at your disposal, Mercer.”

Pause.

“Accepted. Send the details to my usual address.”

Pause.

“Who is the mark?”

Pause.

She caught the slight flare of surprise and then a glimmer of satisfaction as the corner of his eye crinkled ever so slightly. Whoever was on the phone had presented David with a challenge and David enjoyed a good challenge. She knew her husband well. Tasha’s stomach cramped again in response. Unfortunately for her, a challenge meant he could be made more vulnerable to a bullet.

“Assets?”

Natasha’s heart rate sped up, blood pounding in her ears, as she listened to David accept the mission. Oh god! He was going to assassinate someone. The thought made the nausea intensify until she was clutching her stomach. She tried hard to breathe through her nose and listen to the rest of the conversation, but David said very little else.

Finally, unable to hold herself together any longer, Tasha dashed to the washroom. She felt David’s eyes tracking her movements. She shut the door without looking at him and collapsed over top of the toilet, shoving the lid up just as the bile rushed to the surface. Vomit and tears burst forth at the same time. She heaved until she was empty, one arm curved around the top of the toilet, while the other clutched her stomach until the cramping settled a little. She hadn’t heard David enter the washroom so jumped in surprise when she felt his fingers tugging the cap from her overly warm head. He reached past her slumped body and flushed the toilet for her.

She closed her eyes and leaned her clammy head against her forearm where it was braced against the edge of the seat. David didn’t say anything. She heard him turn on the tap in the sink and then he crouched behind her. She wanted to shove him away, but was too weak to open her eyes let alone go up against a fully trained killer. She moaned in appreciation when he crouched behind her, gently moved the sticky hair at the back of her neck aside and pressed a cool, wet cloth against her overheated skin.

“You understand, Natasha?” he asked quietly, settling on the floor behind her.

He made sure the cloth on her neck stayed put and then shifted her hips so she was sitting more comfortably between his spread legs. She felt tugging against her ankles and peeked down between her hands to see him unlacing her boots. He pulled them off her feet and tossed them aside. She curled her toes against the uncomfortable sensation of the cold melting snow that had fallen from the boots soaking into her socks. David reached behind him, pulled a towel from the rack and wrapped it around her feet, protecting her from the wet floor. She felt a rush of gratitude at his kindness for taking care of her, then a spark of revulsion hit her, nearly doubling her back over the toilet again. She’d just heard him accept a job to kill someone and knew deep down he was looking forward to it. She was being touched by the hands of a killer. Misery flooded through her.

She nodded her head, still not lifting her face from the cradle of her arms. He was asking if she understood the significance of his phone call. How could she not? He’d made sure that she stayed to hear the important part. He could have waved her away, or relocated to another room. Instead, he left no doubt in her mind that he had accepted a job and that they would soon be leaving the safety of their idyllic hideaway.

She took a quick breath and whispered, “Are you going to kill someone?”

He didn’t answer the question at first. She felt him tense behind her. “Why would you ask a question like that, my love?” he asked, his voice low and dangerous, my love, heavily accented to her ear.

Finally, she moved, forcing herself to lift her head and turn so she could look at him, stormy eyes accusing. “Because you’re a killer and I heard you taking a job. Th-this Mercer person has hired you to kill someone else, haven’t they?”

He shook his head, his dark eyes sharp on her pale face. He ran a finger over her cheek and across her chin as though checking her for damage after her bout of illness. He leaned forward, getting in her space and staring her down. “You ask dangerous questions, Natasha. It would be better if you just did as you were told and let me work.”

She brought a hand up to his chest and tried to push him back, her fingers brushing the leather of his holster. She jerked her hand away with a frown. She hadn’t realized he was carrying his weapon. Why would he need it on the mountain? “If you wanted me dead, I would be dead.”

He nodded slowly and traced her jaw with his fingertip. “This is true. However, I can cause a great deal of… discomfort… in your life if you were to cross me again, Natasha. Please tread carefully.”

“I won’t go back to the way things were.” She stated ignoring his warning tone. She moaned as another wave of nausea threatened. She wrapped her arms around her stomach and tried to push the discomfort aside.

“You don’t have a choice,” he said. “You were happy then if you recall, you can be happy again. Travelling with me when I have jobs.”

She laughed bitterly. “I was naïve and young then. I’m happy now, David, on this mountain.” With you, she wanted to add, but stopped herself. She couldn’t bring herself to restart their argument from the evening before. She was in no fit state for that kind of fight. Besides, she was vulnerable enough without opening herself up further.

David said nothing more. He didn’t need to. There was nothing further to argue. They both knew the outcome was inevitable. He would leave the mountain and she would go with him. She turned away from him, resting her back against the bathtub. She brought her knees up, rested her arms on top of them and dropped her head.

“Can you please go?” she whispered.

She could feel David tense beside her and thought he might refuse. Perhaps it was the defeat in her voice and the slump to her shoulders, or maybe it was that she had nowhere to run. He stood, touched her head for a brief moment and then left her alone in the washroom, closing the door quietly behind him. As soon as he was gone she allowed the tears to flow. She sobbed into her braced arms, trying to muffle the sound, afraid he might come back and attempt to hold her while she let loose her misery. She knew it would be a cruelty worse than any he’d committed thus far if he tried to comfort her. He was the cause of her agony and there was nothing he could do to relieve her.

Eventually she must have slumped onto the bathmat and fallen asleep because she woke up in their bed, disoriented. She wasn’t wearing her heavy coat anymore and the blanket was wrapped snuggly around her body. She pushed it aside and sat up. She felt nasty and a little hung over from her crying jag on the washroom floor. Sliding off the end of the bed, she stood and made her way out of the bedroom, finger combing her hair.

She decided she didn’t feel much better. Her body felt leaden and a little like it didn’t belong to her. Though she knew it was mostly due to the shock of David’s phone call, she partly blamed the disembodied feeling on the myriad of bruises David left littering her pale skin after the way he had taken her the night before. He’d been anything but gentle in his ruthless domination of her body while proving to her that he could force not only her compliance, but her pleasure as well. She glared at him from beneath her lashes as she made her way to the fridge where she poured herself a large glass of milk and picked up an apple. She slid into a chair opposite him and ate her snack while he concentrated on the laptop.

As she finished eating, he closed the laptop and stood. “I’m going into town,” he said gruffly. “Will you join me?”

Her breath caught and for a split second she considered asking him if he were actually giving her a choice since he seemed intent on taking so many of her choices away. Then she thought better of antagonizing him. If they only had a few days left at the cabin, perhaps she should make the best of her time. She shook her head and stood to turn away from the table, tossing her apple core in the garbage.

He pulled a heavy jacket over his broad shoulders and adjusted the collar. She sucked in a quick breath and changed her answer. “Actually… I’d like to go. There are a few things I want to pick up.”

His sharp gaze clashed with hers for a second and then swept her from head to foot, taking in her still pale features. He nodded and waited patiently while she rushed into the washroom and brushed her teeth. She pulled her dark hair back into a low ponytail and crammed a wool hat over her head, pulling it low over her ears. Though the days were beginning to warm up compared to the deep chill of a Canadian or Russian winter, snow and ice still clung to the forested mountains. She pulled on her mittens and met him at the door, stiffening only a little when he took her elbow and helped her into the cab of the truck. She tried not to resent the solicitude. Where once, she had found his small kindnesses charming, now she saw them as more sinister. A way to control and dominate his young wife.

She glared at him from beneath her lashes as he made he his way around the truck and climbed into the driver’s seat. Tasha hadn’t driven the entire time they had been on the mountain. In fact, she rarely drove. Though she technically knew how to, she could count on both hands the amount of times she’d been behind the wheel of a car. Now, the idea made her nervous. It was yet another way she saw herself as being controlled. She turned in her seat, facing the passenger door so David couldn’t read the resentment on her face. Maybe it was her mind playing tricks, but at the moment, it felt as though he couldn’t do a single thing right. And she was just too upset to let him try.

She trailed after David in the grocery store, her heart sinking when she saw he purchased only enough groceries for a few days. They truly were leaving. Her nerves grew taut as she saw their time in town coming to an end.

Finally, she gathered enough courage to ask, “May I please have some money for the pharmacy? I’m running out of my f-favourite lip gloss.”

David stilled for a moment, studying her features as though looking for something, his own face impassive. He seemed to come to some kind of conclusion and reached for his wallet. He gave her far more cash than she would need. She tried to protest, but he just wrapped her fingers around the money and gave her a slight push. “You should have your own money.” His dark eyes were on her face, searching, before he continued. “When I can trust that you won’t run, I will ensure you have an account and access to your own funds.”

Her mouth opened and she stood speechless as he strode away from her after telling her to meet him at the truck in fifteen minutes. She was torn between wanting to go after him and see what he was up to. He never left her alone in town. Why would he suddenly trust her not to run away? Not that she could get far with a hundred dollars and no transportation, but it was still strange. Instead, she thanked god for the small boon of privacy and went into the pharmacy. She’d had no idea how she was supposed to hide a pregnancy test from him and she wasn’t ready to divulge her suspicions just yet.