“I want to stay like this, Lexi, with you in my bed, under my roof,” Dillon said, his voice deep and sleep filled. “I want you to be mine in every conceivable way, not because I’d keep you here—which has crossed my mind—but because you know this is where you’re supposed to be.” His words were genuine, serious. He had his hand right between my legs, his palm covering my pussy. It was this act of ownership, and it made me feel good.

I didn’t feel like a piece of property to Dillon, not with the way he held me, and not with the words he spoke. This was fast, maybe even insane, but it felt right.

I’d come here looking for answers, looking for something that would bring realization and reality into my life. I’d hoped I’d find that with Dillon, and that my instincts hadn’t been wrong in thinking we were two of the same.

I shifted on the bed so I could face him. He had this intense look on his face, but I’d come to realize that was just Dillon. He was hard in all ways, closed off from his emotions after whatever he’d gone through. I felt the product of his desire for me, his cock still so hard, so big. We might have just had sex, but it seemed like he was still ready for me, still needing me.

But when I shifted closer, he placed a hand on my neck, not adding pressure but stopping me, being proprietary.

“Do you want this?” he asked softly.

“I want this,” I said without question. Maybe this was too soon, too deep? But we’d just had sex. Surely being that intimate with a man, hearing the way he spoke about me and the things he wanted with me, meant this wasn’t just about being together physically?

He cupped my cheek and for long seconds said nothing. The feel of his thumb moving along my skin, soft, gentle, told me this man, despite his fierceness, was a gentle giant.

But only to you.

I knew that. I felt it.

I looked at his inner bicep and saw a small black sparrow tattoo. Not thinking, just acting, I lifted my hand and touched that small design.

“What does it mean?”

He was silent for a second. “The freedom I know my brother would want for me, but that I can’t give in to.”

I stared into his face, saw his expression clouded with whatever he was currently thinking about.

Even I could see the symbolism of the darkness of the little bird, of the lack of dimension, life.

“You can have whatever you want.”

His face softened just a fraction, and he leaned in and kissed me. “I have you. That’s all I need.”

I melted against him, and for long seconds I just rested my head on his chest and listened to the sound of his heart beating.

“Can you live with that in a man?”

I didn’t need to elaborate on what he meant. I knew. I tipped my head back and stared into his face once more. “I came here because I saw something in you I saw in myself each and every day.” I placed my hand on his stubble-covered cheek. “I’m not looking to change you. Who you are is what I want. You’re who I want.” I went back to resting my head on his chest, and we stayed like that, not speaking, just breathing.

Just living.

* * *

I listened to the sound of Lexi sleeping. I watched the rise and fall of her chest as she breathed. Her face was unmarred by the fact she rested, was content and peaceful. She knew she was safe with me. I could sense it, feel it in the way she relaxed against me.

I smoothed my hand down her side, along the dip of her waist, over her hip, and along her ass.

She was mine in all ways.

I wouldn’t let her go.

She’d accept who I was, that I wasn’t the “good guy.” I’d go to hell to protect her, and take anyone with me that thought to hurt her, but I’d never be that knight in shining armor that rode in on a white horse to save the day.

I was more aptly the monster in a horror movie.

I could never submit to my darkness. It just dissolved into background noise because she was in my life.

It was true that with her I felt this calm, this easiness I’d never felt before. But I’d seen too much, in life and in war; I’d never be able to be the man she deserved.

But I’d strive each and every day to make her see, to let her know she was the only thing that mattered to me. Without her in my life I was just walking around with that cloud of hatred and self-loathing hanging over my head.

With her by my side I felt a semblance of being complete. This was fast, maybe even a little on the crazy side, but I lived for that … I’d live for her.

I might not be able to change who I was, but I could make damn sure I gave her a happy life and that she knew she came first. Always.