Dahlia

I can see Bunny moving around in the diner, her head sailing back and forth between booths. I keep the car running, ready to get going.

She's quick about coming to the car this time, apparently having listened to my snippy lecture the other day. As she throws herself into the passenger seat, I see her hand instantly go out for my phone and I slap the back of it lightly.

She flinches, drawing her hand back in and looking hurt.

“What?” she pouts. “I just want to check in on my new favorite soap opera: As The Dahlia Blooms.”

“Put your seatbelt on.”

She does as she's told, buckling the strap over her skinny little hips. “You seriously don't want to show me? How did the panty picture turn out? What did he say?”

“I don't know… nothing, really.”

“Oh, come on!” she huffs. “He must've said something! Wait… are you serious? Did he really not say anything at all?”

I pull the car into the stripmall with the China Fountain restaurant.

“Here, can you go get it?” I ask her, handing her my debit card. “Just sign my name. I'll wait here.”

“Wait, you're being serious here? You're not going to tell me anything at all?”

I halfway turn toward her, instantly softening when I see her sincere pout. I guess she really is disappointed and I wonder why I am being so territorial.

“Okay… fine. Just go get the food,” I suggest. “Then I'll get you all caught up.”

She practically skips out of the car and into the restaurant, dashing back out with two large plastic bags in her hands that she drops into the back seat before sliding back in next to me and buckling her seatbelt once again. Then she claps her hands lightly under her chin.

“Okay! Tell me all about it!” she squeals.

I pull back out into traffic, happy that I don’t have to look directly at her. It’s all so strange and ticklish in my mind, just think about it makes me blush fiercely.

“Well first, I want to say that I did not appreciate you telling him about that dream I had.”

“About the… oh, right!” she sighs, remembering. “Well, it was a good dream. Hot.”

Slowing at a red light, I flip on the turn signal and lean forward to check cross traffic.

“But it was a secret!” I remind her. “I thought we had like a pact or something. And then you just went ahead and laid it on him, right off the bat like that!”

“Fair enough, it was a super-secret sex dream. But then again, what if I hadn't?” she counters.

“What is that supposed to mean?”

She sighs through her nose, drumming her fingers impatiently on her knee. “Dahlia, tell the truth. What was your real plan there?”

“It wasn't my plan. It was your plan, remember?”

“Exactly! And the moment that I turned my back on you, you were going to wimp out, right?”

“I was not going to wimp out,” I protest.

“You were totally going to wimp out!” She rolls her eyes. “If I hadn't jumped you in there with both feet, you would never have done anything. Come on. Admit it.”

I just shake my head, even though maybe she's got a point.

“You know, I just figure the best strategy is always just to go for it,” she muses, staring out the window as we drive through my subdivision. “I mean, I know that you are all caution and baby steps, but I've always subscribed to the idea that immediate gratification is the very best kind of gratification. Just go for it!”

Rolling into the driveway, I notice August’s BMW parked behind my dad's car. My heart leaps in my chest.

“Oh, he's here,” Bunny purrs. “Well, now, would you look at that?”

“Oh, my gosh, how am I supposed to face him?!”

My cheeks go hot, reddening instantly. Bunny gives me a sidelong look.

“You're gonna be fine,” she tells me in a commanding voice. “You own this, okay?”

“I don’t feel like I own anything right now!” I confess quickly.

“Dammit, Dahlia, would you please just stop it?”

“Stop what?”

She slaps her thighs with her palms in frustration.

“Stop acting like such a wimp!” she huffs. “Where's the old Dahlia? The one who never gets upset or ruffled or anything?”

“I don't even know what you are talking about.”

“Yes you do. You always have your shit together, Dahlia, okay? It's one of the things I love about you. So get your shit together. Own this situation. Stop acting like such a nervous Nelly!”

I sigh through my nose, shaking my head. She's right, I guess. I need to get my old self back online. Even I am not comfortable with this tentative, nervous version of me.

“Send him a text. Right now.”

“I've been texting him all day. Let's just go eat dinner,” I sigh.

Quick as lightning, her fingers reach out and snatch my phone off the dash.

“Nope. I want you to send him a text right now!”

“Give me that!” I insist. Luckily, she gives up the phone when I reach for it and does not make me wrestle her to the ground. Because I will. I totally will.

“Fine. That's more like it,” she sniffs. “Now send him a text, Dahlia. Right now.”

“What should I say?” I grumble, considering it.

She shrugs. “I don't know, because I don't know what you sent already!” she reminds me pointedly. “When you sent him a picture, did he send you a picture back? What was it?”

“No, after the picture we just kind of texted back and forth. Just, you know… flirty stuff.”

She raises her eyebrows. “Sexy stuff?”

My chest gets tight. “Yes,” I admit. “Sexy stuff.”

She smiles, looking me up and down. “You like this, don't you?” she says knowingly.

“I don't know if I like it or not,” I lie. Still, I feel how hot my cheeks are. I'm probably bright red right now. “But Lori said more hints about needing us to maybe meet with Kirkman again. So whether or not I like it or not I have to keep going. I have to get that meeting or she’ll know I made the whole thing up.”

Bunny narrows her eyes at me. “No… It's not just Lori. You like this. You're enjoying it. Admit it.”

“I don't know what you're talking about.”

“Ha!” she hoots. “You are totally enjoying this! You’re finally getting to take some your cute little pet fantasies for a walk, Dahlia. You're like a secret slut!”

I roll my eyes. “Enough, Bunny. What should I text him?”

“You like it! Admit it!”

I can tell by the serious look on her face that she's not going to give up. In fact, if I don't get her to stop talking about it, there's a good chance she's going to blurt it out in front of my dad or August and really try to humiliate me.

“Fine. I like it. But just a little!”

“I knew it!”

“Now what do I text him?”

She chews on her lower lip. “I dunno… ask him to send you a picture. You sent him one, so that sounds fair. He should send you one too.”

“A picture of what?” I ask, unsure this is such a good idea.

“Let him figure that out for himself,” she shrugs. “Let him be creative.”

Heart racing, I send him a quick text. He asks me for more information and I just let it go, hinting that he should come up with something. Bunny glances over my shoulder, scanning the text history and sighing happily.

“See?” she says smugly, getting out and retrieving the food bags from the back seat. “I told you this wouldn’t be so hard. You totally got this!”

“Yeah, I guess you're right,” I admit.

It seems like the whole world is sexting each other. I’ve read about it on BuzzFeed and in Cosmo. Some of the exchanges get really hot. Like, blistering hot.

But I never thought I would be the one to do it. I’ve never even had a serious boyfriend before, much less had anyone to sext with. Every time I go to type something, I get something that feels like stage fright. It’s all completely new and I’m making it up as I go along.

But I guess it’s not as hard as I thought it would be, once I get my head in the game. Actually I guess it’s kind of fun. Once I say something, it feels like a tiny barrier is swept away, some imaginary wall. Makes me think about all the other things I could be saying to him, all the things that I've been holding back all this time.

My dad waves over his head without turning around when Bunny and I amble through the front door. I deposit the bags of food on the dining room table. The football game sounds fill the living room, not leaving a lot of room for much else.

I drop my phone into my purse, making sure that it nestles snugly at the bottom so nobody can see any notifications when they pop up. I don't need any kind of embarrassing moments to happen during dinner. Then I head off to the back hall to wash my hands and tie my hair back before dinner.

As I come around the corner, I almost slam directly into August’s broad chest. He almost knocks the wind out of me as he emerges suddenly from somewhere in the back of the house. I gasp, trying to figure out if I'm falling or crashing into him or what, and he flinches, mumbling something about trying to find the bathroom as he darts past me, not even making eye contact.

After I wash my hands, I come back out to see Bunny has most of the Chinese food arranged on the dining room table, with serving spoons and chopsticks in a neat pile. I fix myself a bowl, glancing over it at August every few seconds to see what he's doing. I only see the back of his head. He seems completely enthralled with the game just like my dad.

“Food’s here, you guys,” Bunny calls out, shooting me a look. It seems kind of rude that they asked us to bring take out and then didn't even acknowledge that it was here.

Scowling, I wander back into the kitchen for a glass of white wine. Bunny follows me.

“Did he say something to you?” she asks me. “In the hallway or something?”

“Who? August? No… it was weird. He just rushed past me. I don't think he even looked at me.”

“Oh, okay,” she shrugs. “You just look pissed off or something.”

“No, it was just weird, like I said. And I don't think they’re being polite, ignoring us, but I guess… oh, I don't know. I'm probably just being touchy.”

“Don't overthink it,” she sighs. “My family hasn’t sat down and had a meal together in probably two years. It's not that big of a deal.”

“Yeah, I guess you're right,” I say as I lean back against the counter. After a moment or two, I feel the vibration traveling along the surface. Setting my bowl down, I reach into my purse and fish out my phone.

“What's that? Did you get a text?” she asks.

Chewing slowly, I nod. The notification says I got a response on Instagram, already.

“He answered you?” she whispers urgently. “While he was here? In your living room??”

“Yes, be quiet!” I whisper back as I open the app. I scroll down to the last message; it's a picture. I click on it to expand and suck in my breath, biting my lips together to keep from squealing.

“Let me see!” she insists.

I clap the phone to my chest and back away. “No way!”

She lunges for me with her hand out, but stops up short. I bend over protectively, twisting to keep the phone out of her reach.

“What are you guys doing?” August asks, striding into the kitchen with a scowl on his face. Bunny squeals in surprise and immediately starts choking on a mouthful of food. I clap her helpfully on the back, trying to dislodge it so she doesn't die in my kitchen.

August sighs and rolls his eyes, pulling a couple of beers from the fridge and opening them. When Bunny stands up straight again, red-faced and teary-eyed, he nods curtly at her and leaves the room.

Protectively, I drop my phone down the front my jeans, into my panties. I’m at least 60% sure she won’t go after it in there. Bunny gasps in surprise and outrage.

“Why would you do that? I wanna see!”

“I told you can't see it, and you can't see it!” I explain.

“Ugh! You suck!” she hisses.

“Be quiet!”

She stomps off, taking her food with her.

Chewing thoughtfully, I wait for my heartbeat to slow down. He sent me a picture, one that definitely evens the score. Though I only saw it for a second, it’s clear in my mind. He sent me a picture of himself, hard and ready. His penis was in his hand, his hand strong and solid against the most magnificent erection I've ever seen.

But what thrilled me even more was that I saw the background. The unmistakable pink bedspread. The frilly edge of the lamp shade.

He was in my room. Naked in my room. Right there, in my space.

I don't know why this is so exciting. I can't imagine what it means, but knowing that he was just doing that, touching himself in my room, shakes me to the core. I feel closer to him than ever before, knowing that he invaded my space like that. He’s only been there in my dreams before, and my dreams are slowly becoming reality.