An hour later, Nate and I are at Echo Lake, a hidden gem that sits on the top of a mountain. There are “No trespassing” signs all over the place, but since no one ever comes here and we fully intend to clean up after ourselves, we ignore them.

The sun is shining brightly and the breeze is a perfect temperature to keep us cool in the eighty degree weather. It’s the perfect day. I lean back on my elbows, the blue fleece blanket providing just enough protection from the hard ground beneath. Tilting my head to the side, I catch Nate staring at me.

“What?” I ask, sitting up. “Do I have a bug on me?” I hate bugs.

He laughs and places a hand on my shoulder. “No. Relax.” His hand gently squeezes and then lingers. God, how I wish I could feel that hand touching every inch of me. Although I’m not sure what the point would be. He’s leaving. I can’t make him stay, and I’d never want him to pass up a job opportunity like this for me. He deserves this. I have to keep my distance, remain completely in the friend zone until he leaves.

“What are you thinking?” he asks.

I lean back again and his hand falls. “How perfect this is.” I look out over the lake because staring into his eyes is too much. My sunglasses don’t entirely conceal my eyes, which means they won’t mask my tears either.

“It’s a beautiful day.”

“That’s not what I mean.”

“I know.” This time his hand finds mine, and I can’t resist turning in his direction.

“I feel like I’m losing part of myself.”

“We’ve been best friends for a long time.”

He’s so much more than that. He’s been my world. Even when I was dating Aaron, it was Nate I ran to when I was upset or excited or wanted to talk. I know I still have Ashley, but she has her own life. Separate from mine. Nate and I have been walking this path together for twelve years. How do I go from seeing him every day to seeing him a few times a month? A tear falls from my eye.

“None of that.” Nate moves closer and wipes the tear from my cheek. “You aren’t losing me, Aria. You never could.”

I lean my head on his shoulder, and he presses a kiss to my forehead. I’m tempted to tilt my head up and find his lips with mine, but without any liquid courage, I’m paralyzed with fear. We sit like this for a while, neither saying a word, just enjoying each other’s company. Aaron and I rarely did this. We were always on the go, attending parties or work functions for his job. Even when he came over at night, it was to fool around. Then he’d fall asleep, claiming he had a long day. That was usually when I went into the living room and called Nate. We’d talk for hours, with me falling asleep with the phone in hand sometime around two in the morning. I guess we can still talk on the phone like that once he moves to Pennsylvania. But what about this? This closeness? The warmth of his body next to mine?

I press my hand to his chest.

“Are you hungry?” he asks, sitting up a bit.

I move away, forcing a smile so he can’t see I’m disappointed to not be in his arms anymore. “Starved,” I lie.

He opens the cooler and pulls out two wrapped sandwiches. “Tony said he put extra banana pepper rings on your cracked pepper turkey sandwich.”

“That’s why I love him,” I say, already unwrapping it. I focus on eating and not the feelings that are threatening to consume me.

We make small talk for a while. Nate tells me about the apartment he rented in Pennsylvania, which sounds much bigger than the one he’s living in now.

“It’s more like half a house really. There’s this really cute community, and all the houses are split into two apartments. No more elevators or parking garages. I have two parking spots right outside my front door, and there’s even a fenced in yard. It’s tiny since the backyard is divided in two, but I can get a grill and there’s enough room for a patio set.” His smile melts my heart. He’s getting everything he’s ever wanted.

“That’s great. I can’t wait to visit so I can see it in person.”

“You should come down next weekend. It will take me a while to meet people, so I’ll be bored out of my mind there by myself. Say you’ll come.”

“Of course I will.” I drink the rest of my lemonade and kick off my sandals. “It’s getting a little warm. I’m going to stick my feet in the water.”

“You?” His eyes widen. “Little Miss Only-Swims-in-Pools?”

“This is a man-made lake. Without any connection to a bigger body of water, I don’t have to worry about any sharks.” After reading the story behind the movie Jaws, about the Matawan Man-Eater, I’m terrified of large bodies of water.

“Not great whites at least.”

“The Matawan Man-Eater was a bull shark, not a great white. The movie got that wrong.”

“You read too much Weird N.J.”

“I’m a journalist who happens to have lived in New Jersey all her life. What did you expect?”

He laughs, a low laugh that makes my stomach flutter like it’s become home to a bunch of hummingbirds. “I’m a journalist living in New Jersey, and I’ve never read an issue of Weird N.J.”

“Yeah, but you’re a traitor, running off to Pennsylvania.”

He leans closer. “I don’t plan on reading Weird Pennsylvania either.”

“Can’t commit to any state, can you?”

“Apparently, I can only commit to you.”

I cock my head at him.

“I mean, I’ve stuck with you for this long.”

“But now you’re leaving me, too.” I stand up and brush off the back of my shorts.

He jumps to his feet and grabs my arm before I can make my way to the lake’s edge. “Hey. I’d never leave you, Aria. You’ll be my best friend until the day I die. I wish I could take you with me.”

I force a laugh. “Shrink me and pack me in your suitcase?”

He sighs and his hand lowers from my elbow, his fingers lacing through mine. “I don’t know how to live without you by my side. Hell, we lived in the same dorm all throughout college. Now we live in the same town and work for the same paper. You’ve always been with me. The second another position opens up at The Sentinel, I’m lobbying for you to fill it.”

My chest fills with love for this man. I know if I had any shot at that job, he would have dropped out of the running and sacrificed it to me. Not that I would have wanted him to. That’s just Nate. “And leave New Jersey behind? Sounds like you don’t want to be the only traitor.”

“I want to be...” His sentence is left unfinished.

“What, Nate?”

He lets go of me and moves toward the water. I follow, studying his profile, trying to understand what’s going on inside his head. He’s too difficult to read at times like this. It’s like he’s hiding his feelings from me. Pushing me away.

“I don’t want things to change.”

He means he doesn’t want us to change. Does he sense my true feelings? Am I being too obvious?

“They won’t. Everything will be fine. We’ll talk on the phone and visit on weekends, like you said. Same old Nate and Aria.” I force a shrug when he looks my way.

“You promise?”

I swallow my heart and tell the biggest lie of my life. “I promise. Nothing between us will change.”