This week had been like something out of my wildest dreams. First pizza night—which was a really big deal, according to Soren—and then the following evening, we went out and got ice cream at this little frozen yogurt shop downtown.

But the cherry on top was that every night, I fell asleep wrapped in the loving embrace of a man I still couldn’t believe was real. It felt like some sort of surreal fantasy and I hadn’t woken up yet.

And that was the thing—I was afraid that at any given moment, if I so much as breathed wrong, it would all come crashing down around me. As much as I wanted to cling to this bubbly feeling, this elation, this sweet little slice of happiness? I was scared, and at the core of it, the unknown was eating at me.

Would Huxley still want me if I wasn’t carrying his child? How had I gone from terrified of being pregnant, to terrified of not being pregnant? It was all so fucked up. It muddied my mind and clouded my head with doubts and uncertainties.

So I sat down at the table and grabbed a pen and I drew.

No. I didn’t draw; I seethed. I poured every last terrible, anxious emotion out in thick black ink strokes across flimsy white notebook paper. The pen nib scritched loudly across the page. I hunched over the notebook and lost myself to the sharp angles and bared teeth and the bloodless eyes that stared out at me and haunted my ever-living nightmares.

I didn’t feel Soren come into the kitchen until he touched my shoulder. Jolting forwards, I bit back a cry and gripped my pen even tighter. “Y-You scared me!”

Soren waved both hands in front of him, then offered a doleful smile. “Sorry, Chance, I didn’t mean to. You just looked so…intense.” He leaned in to peer down at the mess of scribbles on the blue-lined page. “Wow, this is really good but it looks kind of angry. You okay?”

I dragged in a breath. “No. It’s… It’s vent art, and no. I’m not okay.” I set the truth free.

The other Omega’s brows puckered in concern. “Can I help somehow? I’m a good listener.”

“I… Would you take me to town? I need to pick something up at the store.”

“Of course, but let me tell Hux where we’re going so he doesn’t worry, okay?” When I nodded, he darted off. I closed my eyes and tried to calm my rapidly beating heart. I flipped the notebook shut and shuffled it beneath some clutter on the table. By the time we left the house, I was damn near shaking.

I needed to know.

“I’m gonna run in real quick. You can wait here, if you want,” I offered when Soren pulled into the lot of the nearest drug store. My heart thudded viciously against my breastbone, making my chest ache with each beat. I jammed both hands into the pockets of my hoodie so the other Omega couldn’t see the way I was trembling.

“You sure you don’t need help?”

“Nope, I’m good. I’ll be back in a sec.” I kicked open the door of the truck, then sprinted across the lot. My sneakers squeaked over the rain-damp pavement while the sky drizzled down on me. I hunched my shoulders and walked through the automatic sliding doors, to be greeted by a frizzy-haired older lady wearing a bright blue smock.

“Hi there! Welcome to CJ’s! Can I help you find anything?”

My stomach flip-flopped. I quickly shook my head. “Uh, I’m good. Thanks, though,” I mumbled, even though I had no idea where the pregnancy tests were. I guessed they’d be back near the pharmacy. I meandered down the aisles in search of them. Sure enough, there was an entire shelf dedicated to all the different brands.

Chewing on my lip, I leaned in and skimmed the packages. How many should I get? Two? Three? I knew these things could give you false positives if you so much as bumped the tests while they were setting, but… Groaning under my breath, I snagged three different boxes off the shelf and continued my walk of shame back up to the front counter.

“Is this it for you?” the peppy cashier chirped as she scanned the boxes. Beep. Beep. Beep.

I didn’t meet her gaze. “Yeah.” I dug out a couple wrinkled bills from my wallet—money that Huxley had all but forced on me—and handed them over.

“So, are you excited?”

I fumbled with the coins, dropping them onto the counter where they skittered and spun. “I-I don’t know.” Was I excited? Or was this gnawing at the very core of me dread, plain and simple? I didn’t have the first clue about how to raise a kid, no matter what my instincts said. Not to mention, the idea of a little alien creature coming out of my body made my heart go into palpitations.

“Aw, well nerves are perfectly normal, honey! I’m guessing this is your first?” She smiled kindly and patted my arm. I swallowed the lump stuck in my throat and nodded mutely. “Don’t worry. I’m sure it’ll all work out for the best. Babies are such a precious gift.” She finished ringing me up, then handed me the receipt. “You take care.”

“Y-Yeah.” Everything inside of me was quaking now. My stomach pitched and for a breathless, mortifying moment, I thought I might heave up my lunch right here all over the entrance runner. Talk about embarrassing. I gulped down the taste of bile and quickly backed away. I needed to find the bathroom, fast.

My gaze darted around in search of the restroom sign. With the plastic bag gripped tightly in one hand, I made a beeline for the men’s room. The door swung shut behind me, but I was already on my knees in front of a toilet that stunk of industrial cleaners. The pungent, bleachy scent threw me right over the edge. My mouth flooded and I gagged, retching into the porcelain bowl until my sinuses stung and my eyes teared up.

Fuck, fuck, fuck. This was too real. I wasn’t ready to be a dad. Hell, I was barely a functioning adult. I didn’t have a job, I was running from my past and there was a good possibility that there was a tiny, innocent life budding inside of me. I gripped my stomach and sobbed softly, collapsing against the toilet. I couldn’t do this…

Someone rapped on the door and I scrambled to wipe my face. “S-Sorry, I’m almost done,” I called out. My nose was stuffy and my throat hurt, but I needed to pull myself together. I was a hot mess right now. I stood up on stiff, half-numb legs and wavered in the middle of the bathroom stall. “Shit.”

“Chance?” Soren’s worried voice echoed in the small room. “Are you okay? Are you sick?”

I flushed the vomit and wiped my eyes with the edge of my sleeve. I crept out of the stall and over to the sink. “I’m scared.” The truth came out small and hoarse as I thrust the bag into Soren’s arms. He fumbled to pull it open. He took one look inside and whined. I squeezed my eyes shut, dragged in a sharp breath, then washed my hands.

To my surprise, Soren set the bag down on the counter and pulled me in for a hug. “Hey, it’s okay to be scared, but Hux will take care of you, okay? No matter what.” He bumped his forehead against my shoulder and squeezed me. “I promise.”

“I hate this,” I whispered. “I hate it. What if I’m not pregnant, though? What if I’m not? He’d have no reason to keep me around and I—” I wanted to be wanted. God, I wanted to be accepted more than anything.

Soren touched his fingers to my lips, a solemn expression on his face. “Chance. My brother is the strongest person I’ve ever known, but you don’t know how melancholy he’s been these past few months. He plastered on a smile, sure, but he was a shell, a ghost of his former self—until he found you. I haven’t seen Huxley smile like this in forever. Did you ever stop and think that maybe, just maybe, he needs you as much as you need him?”

His kindness was overwhelming and I began to cry all over again. He patted my back, letting me cling to him until I’d scraped together my composure once more. “Th-Thank you, Soren. I hope you’re right.”

Soren grinned. “I usually am about these things. C’mon. Let’s go home.”