CHAPTER SIX
We spend the next few hours going through every inch of the four large department stores located at each end of the mall, as well as a few smaller stores in between. Cassie picks out everything she considers perfect for me, and I spend hours in the dressing rooms.
During one of my sessions in the dressing room, Cassie stands outside pouting. “I don’t see why you won’t get that dress I liked in the last store. It’s perfect on you.”
“I-i-i-it was f-f-f-fifty dollars,” I remind her quietly while pulling a pair of jeans on.
She snorts at my simple reasoning. “What about the shoes in the first store?”
“I-I-I can’t j-j-justify eighty d-d-dollars on shoes.” It makes me uncomfortable to spend someone else’s money, even if they gave permission. “I g-g-got the black s-s-shoes, t-t-though.”
“That’s because it was the cheapest pair I would approve of,” she retorts with no real malice.
“She doesn’t need to get every pair of shoes that fit her, Cassie,” Caleb chides in from somewhere near the fitting room waiting area. “Just because you have a small shoe store in your closet doesn’t mean everyone else should.”
“You’re one to talk, big brother. You should buy stock in those boring ass black and gray shirts you always seem to need.”
Jaxon snickers at Cassie’s words, but Caleb remains silent.
It only takes me a few more seconds to slip on one of the shirts picked for me and open the door. My body tenses, wondering what to expect. Cassie might have made her brother mad with her last statement and I worry Caleb might want to hurt her because of it.
My worries are for nothing, thankfully.
Cassie stands leaning against the wall across from my dressing room while Jaxon and Caleb sit on the wide bench to the left. They both have their heads buried in their phones and their legs surrounded by bags.
“Perfect!” Cassie claps her hands and I startle, jumping back a bit at the sudden noise. All three of them notice and exchange matching looks of concern. My gaze drops to my bare feet and I rock back on my heels. “Th-th-that was the l-l-last thing.”
My goal of distracting them from my strange behavior works well and I loosen the balls my hands had formed from the unwanted attention.
“I saw the little place across from here is having a good sale,” Cassie yelps, strolling past me into the dressing room and gathering up the items she approved of. “Get changed and I’ll bring this stuff up front. Toss that outfit over, though. I want to add it, also.”
My stomach takes that moment to let out a loud rumble and I blush with embarrassment. “S-s-sorry.”
“What for?” Jaxon tilts his head to the side in confusion.
My eyes widen as I try to figure out if he really wants me to answer or if he’s being sarcastic. His brow draws together as he watches me.
I clear my throat nervously. “M-m-my stomach, being h-h-hungry.”
“You’re sorry for being hungry?” His frown deepens as if he doesn’t understand.
He starts to say more, but Caleb jumps in before he can. “I’m actually starving, too. We need to grab some lunch.”
“We ate those pretzels between the first two stores,” Cassie argues, her hands defiantly placed on her hips.
Caleb glances down at his watch and shakes his head, exasperated. “Shit, it’s basically dinner now. We need to get something before we keep going. Pretzels are a snack, Cassie, not a meal.”
“Also, that was over five hours ago, sweetheart,” Jaxon reminds her.
Cassie mopes the whole way to the checkout line with the overly large pile of clothes in her hands. The boys carry all the bags, which leaves me to fidget with my hands, wondering what to do.
Luckily, I don’t need to wonder long. The guys have so many bags already, Cassie and I grab the new lot after it’s paid for and we all make our way to the restaurant. I’m glad the boys convinced her to let us stop for dinner. My feet ache, and it feels good to sit down at the table of the little Mexican restaurant just outside the main mall.
“This is so much fun! Aren’t you having fun, Riley?” Cassie bounces around in her seat.
“Y-y-yeah, but I n-n-never knew shopping w-w-was such hard w-w-work,” I admit, hiding a grin when the boys chortle.
“Wait!” Cassie shouts, startling me.
Caleb and Jaxon stop laughing at my obvious jolt.
“Wh-wh-what?” I whisper, worried I’ve made her mad by saying shopping is hard work.
Her eyes widen. “Have you ever been shopping?”
“Erm… n-n-no? I mean, I w-w-went to the th-th-thrift store once, a-a-and I went to the g-g-grocery store a lot.” My cheeks heat as I bow my head. “Also, Leanne t-t-took me shopping f-f-for a few things l-l-last week. D-d-does that c-c-count?”
“Of course not! Well, unless you bought a bunch of cute vintage clothes at the thrift store.” She barely pauses to take a breath as she continues to chatter. “Why didn’t you ever go shopping? Was it just a money issue?”
“Cassie!” Jaxon growls in warning.
Immediately, my spine straightens, and my hands begin to shake at his tone.
Cassie winces and gives me an apologetic smile. “Sorry, that didn’t sound right. I don’t mean to pry about your old money situation. I’m just naturally curious. I’ve never met anyone who hasn’t been shopping.”
“I-i-it’s o-o-okay,” I assure her, not wanting Jaxon upset with her. “I wasn’t a-a-allowed. I could o-o-only go to school and the g-g-grocery store. My m-m-mother and s-s-step-fa—” I stumble, not able to finish the word. I clear my throat and try again. “They d-d-didn’t allow m-m-me to go p-p-places or anything l-l-like that. I w-w-was supposed to stay in the house unless t-t-they said o-o-otherwise.”
Cassie frowns deeply. “What about hanging out with friends?”
I bite my lip, wondering briefly if she doesn’t notice the two men at our table fuming silently. “I w-w-wasn’t allowed to h-h-have friends. N-n-no one w-w-wanted to t-t-talk to me a-a-anyway. I d-d-don’t talk r-r-right.”
Silence stretches across the table. Did I say something wrong? Peering around, Jaxon and Caleb wear mirroring expressions of pure anger. Their eyes narrow into slits, their hands balled into fists on the table, and their mouths form hard lines. Cassie’s eyes widen, and her brow rises. Her mouth opens, but no words come out. My focus stays on the two angry guys, though, worried they’re mad at me.
Jaxon confirms my fear when he hits the table and roars, “Son of a bitch!”
My flight instincts kick in, and my mind screams at me to run away before he hurts me. I deserve to be hurt for saying something stupid and upsetting him. I shoot a glance at Cassie, and she scrunches her brow at me in confusion. After studying me for a second, her expression quickly morphs into panic. I heed her warning that Jaxon’s about to blow up.
My feet move before I even form a plan. Racing by the entrance to the restaurant kitchen, I vaguely register the waiters shouting about a burst pipe. Hopefully the chaos of whatever happened in the kitchen will distract Jaxon from chasing after me, or at the very least slow him down. I bolt from the restaurant and down the street.
Cassie yells for me to wait, but I can’t stop.
With the sun setting, the light blues and whites of the day morph into darker blues and grays. Lots of people walk the streets, so it’s easier to blend in. Even when the three of them shout my name from far behind me, I race as fast as my feet will carry me, dodging parents with large strollers and shoppers loaded down with bags. A few of the passersby yell and curse at me for narrowly missing them, but I can’t bring myself to care.
Jaxon’s shouts for me to stop continue to reach me, but the further I go, the more people there are. The crowd makes it easy for me to slow my run and blend in more. With a glance behind me I breathe deep at the realization I’ve really lost Jaxon.
Finding an alley, I duck into it and hide behind a dumpster in case he catches up to me or passes by the area.
Keeping as still as possible, I wait a long while before leaving my safe hiding spot.
My chest aches from the breath I couldn’t take until I knew for sure I wasn’t caught, but there’s little relief granted once I release the deep, shuddering breath. This time, I was able to get away, but if I find my way back to the house, Jaxon and possibly Caleb are going to be furious at me for running. A small whimper escapes at the thought. Why couldn’t life be different here? They all seemed great until now. Why did I mess everything up? I’m such an idiot.
With the street now darkened, I trek in the direction I remember the house being.
Since I left the purse Cassie picked out earlier in the restaurant, which holds the cards my dad gave me in it, I’m unable to pay for a cab. I don’t own a phone, not that they would come even if I called. The drive here was a straight shot down a main road, making getting back relatively simple.
It was about an hour drive, so in theory, the walk is doable.
Not long into my hike, the skies open, and rain falls in sheets. Not the light kind of rain you can ignore, but the tropical storm type that soaks everything instantly. My pace slows considerably because of the drop in temperature and lack of visibility in the rain. Freezing and tired, my legs ache from the this walk as well as what we did earlier in the day.
Somehow, I’m able to make it another few hours before my legs give out. The rain hasn’t let up, and I’m soaked to the bone. I massage my aching legs and wonder what awaits me when I make my way back. My entire body shakes, partly from the cold and partly from the fear of what’s waiting.
When I arrive at the house, they’re going to be furious with me for getting away. But they’re going to be even more agitated I took such a long time to come back. If I’m lucky, they’ll get my punishment over with quickly and send me to my room. I refuse to think of what will happen if I’m unlucky. To distract myself from thoughts of punishments, I search the clouds in the sky for some type of break in the rain.
With a startle I realize the rain stopped pelting down on me.
Glancing around, I expect to see the storm passing, but instead I find the rain continuing around me. For some strange reason it’s simply not raining down in the one spot where I dropped down.
After a long while, a minuscule bit of strength rests within my resolve. The strange pattern of the rain works in my favor for the moment, so unfolding myself from the curled position I’d taken up to try staying warm, I push myself to standing. I take the last several miles at a snail’s pace, mostly because my legs won’t cooperate with me.
As soon as the house comes into view the rain begins to hit my body again, the odd reprieve from the wetness gone.
When I finally make it to the house, it’s the middle of the night, and my legs are numb. The lights downstairs are on, which means someone’s waiting up for me. They probably spent all this time sitting around, deciding the perfect way to make me pay for my stupidity.
Pausing at the front door, I take a few deep breaths and decide to bite the bullet, ringing the doorbell because I don’t have a key.
The collection of running footsteps racing for the door has me taking a step back, not knowing what’s going to happen. The door is thrown open, and my dad with Leanne next to him stand there wide eyed. Cassie, Caleb, and Jaxon huddle behind them, but my focus remains on my father. His chest heaves with short breaths, his eyes widen on me, and his hands, loose by his sides, shake visibly.
My mind races with reasons why he would appear so scared. Maybe someone got hurt or something bad happened while I was gone.
I peer around at everyone, and they’re all wearing matching expressions of fear and worry. Their expressions have my mind going to the possible punishments I’m about to receive. Before my mind comes up with anything, Dad yanks me into his arms, lifting me off my feet to hug me tightly. He must not realize I’m drenched.
“Thank God!” he cries. “Oh, Riley, we almost called the police. We drove around town for hours looking for you. We were terrified! Are you okay? Are you hurt?” He sets me down and scans me from head to toe.
I simply stand there, shaking and confused. What in the world is happening?
“Mark, let’s get her dry. She’s soaked,” Leanne insists with a sniffle. Tears stain her cheeks. Once my dad steps out of the way, she hugs me. “I’m glad you’re okay.”
Leanne and Cassie take me upstairs and find me some pajamas.
“Take a warm shower. It’ll make you feel better,” Leanne softly orders.
I do as I’m told, all the while wondering what they’re planning as punishment. After I’m done showering, I’m beyond tired. Just the thought of taking the stairs makes me want to cry. Not wanting to give them any more reason to hate me, I suck it up and stumble downstairs, nearly falling a few times on the way. Everyone sits on the living room sofa when I creep in. No one notices me at first, allowing me to catch part of their conversation.
“Dad, I’m really fucking sorry,” Jaxon murmurs pitifully, his voice broken. It sounds like he’s trying not to cry.
Cassie sits next to him, rubbing his back.
“Son, it isn’t your fault. She doesn’t understand that you weren’t mad at her. She isn’t used to people caring about her and taking care of her. We just need to be patient.” Dad lets out a long breath and sits back. “Maybe we should sit her down and talk to her. Explain what she can expect from us.”
I don’t want to get caught eavesdropping, and I’m not sure I want to know what they’re talking about. Instead of waiting where I am, I shuffle farther into the room and make myself known. Leanne spots me first and hops up. She takes my hand and leads me to the couch, starting out at a normal walking pace. My legs refuse to work correctly, giving out after two steps.
Caleb lurches forward, catches me around the waist, and pulls me into the seat next to him and Leanne. I can’t even look at Caleb as I murmur a thank you because I’m terrified he hates me like everyone else must.
“Riley, we need to talk.” My head lifts to see Jaxon staring right at me, and my whole body turns to stone.
This is what I’ve been dreading. This is where he lets me know what my idiocy has earned me.
“P-p-please,” I whimper. “I-I-I’m s-s-sorry. I d-d-didn’t m-m-mean to r-r-run. I’ll n-n-n-n-never do i-i-it again. I-I-I’m s-s-so s-s-sorry.” My body shakes harder, my voice cracking with fear. My only hope is that begging means he’ll go easy on me. “I-I-I’ll do w-w-whatever you w-w-want. P-p-please, j-j-just don’t h-h-hurt me.”
Jaxon reels back, gaping at me before his body stills. Cassie and Leanne start to cry. Why are they upset? Did begging make things worse? Should I have kept my mouth shut?
My dad stands and takes a step toward me.
Realizing he didn’t like my pleading, I cower into the couch and he immediately stops in his tracks. To my left, Caleb shifts and suddenly pulls me onto his lap and wraps me up in his arms. As soon as my mind catches up to what happened, I stiffen. My head swirls with thoughts of what he plans to do. A lump forms in my throat, preventing me from taking deep breaths, and my lungs burn with a lack of oxygen. Waves of dizziness push my vision out of focus and a loud ringing fills my ears.
I feel Caleb lean down to my ear, and when he speaks, his voice comes out low and soothing, not at all what I expected. It gives me a shiver, but not the kind I’m used to, not from fear. “Baby, no one is going to hurt you. I promise, not one person in this room wants to hurt you in any way. We all care about you so much, and it kills us to think of the terrible things you’ve gone through. You may not have told us anything, but we aren’t blind. We know shit was terrible for you. You look like you’re about to jump out of your skin waiting for something bad to happen to you. But please, believe me when I say I will never let anything like that happen to you again. None of us will.”
I pull back and stare into his eyes.
It’s always been effortless for me to spot liars. Caleb’s eyes hold nothing but warmth and truth. Right now, I trust his words and believe he will try to protect me. I’m not getting punished tonight. Tears of relief rush down my cheeks.
He puts his hand on my head gently and pulls it to rest on his chest. I hold onto him like he’s my lifeline, and at this moment, he kind of is. He whispers to me, telling me, “It’s okay. You’re safe.” He says it over and over while he holds me, his hand slowly brushing over my arm to give me comfort.
Right now, I never want to move away from this spot, from this feeling of safety.