23
IT WAS A LITTLE JET and a bumpy ride. It dropped us off just inside the city, but we refused a Sect van even though, technically, we were here on official duty.
Being on official duty, of course, had its constraints. Rhys had only bought us a few hours in Madrid, and even in the state the Sect was in now, it was still pretty strict when it came to loaning out its aircraft. That meant that we were on borrowed time; we were to complete our investigation by the end of the day and return to London immediately. The jet wasn’t even going to leave the tarmac.
Naomi wanted to see me by sundown, so as long as she kept it short, we could make the deadline, though I still wasn’t keen on having to go back to the facility. Disguised in the same ball cap and shades we all had, Belle rented us a car and we set off down the Spanish streets.
“Who knew you spoke Spanish?” said Chae Rin from the backseat, though it was one of the few comments any of us had made the entire trip. None of us was much in the mood for talking.
Belle had been in Madrid before and knew the way to Natalya’s apartment. She drove us through the city, the skies clear, the sun pleasantly biting. Madrid had not gone untouched by the influence of modernity and globalization. Popular brand-name coffee shops, stores, and restaurants were on every corner. But there were sights I wasn’t as used to. We drove past the Plaza de Cibeles square, the castle-like white marble structure stretching up into the morning. Gazing out the window, I watched the street vendors and performers pass in and out of view. People skated under the sun and under the safety of the APD outside the city: a tower at the top of which a giant kinetic structure of moving metal plates reflected a frequency that spanned over a hundred miles. It was too far away for me to see it from here, but I’d seen it from above when our jet had begun to descend.
Natalya’s apartment was close to a gigantic park, tucked away in the Salamanca neighborhood, packed with chic restaurants and outdoor bars. Belle knew someone who ran a rooftop bar nearby—not her friend, per se, but certainly Natalya’s. It was still morning, and the bar hadn’t opened yet. He was willing to let us stay in secrecy for a few hours while the bar was closed, but he warned us that we’d have to leave before the clients started streaming in at sundown. Well, that was our timeline to begin with.
“Are you okay?” I asked Chae Rin after following her to the roof. She was sitting at one of the many empty tables with a glass of water in her hands. Water. Huh. I’d expected she’d have taken advantage of the setting and gotten some alcohol. But Chae Rin didn’t seem like herself. She was slouched over the table, worry aging her soft, pale features as she stared into her half-empty glass.
When she saw me coming, her expression hardened. “What’s it to you?”
“Whoa.” I stopped, holding up my hands in a sign of placation. “I’m just asking if you’re okay. No ulterior motives. I’m just a bit worried, that’s all. You’ve been weirdly quiet for a while.”
“You’re worried about me, huh?” I couldn’t tell if Chae Rin’s laugh was a jab at me or herself. But she waved me over and I took the invitation, sitting next to her.
“Hey, kid, you remember when we first met in Quebec? You were whining at me endlessly about joining this ridiculous fight, which, by the way, we still haven’t won because shit just keeps getting crazier and crazier?”
“Yeah.” A sudden surge of shame made me look away from her. “I said some really messed-up stuff too. I’m so sorry.”
But Chae Rin shook her head with a little smile. “No, it’s okay. I already beat you up for that, so it’s all good. But . . . you remember when I said that being an Effigy is hardest on families?”
I did. And after seeing Uncle Nathan, his worry and shame, I knew exactly what she meant.
“After the awards show, my sister told me that my mom had another . . . um.”
She hesitated and quickly looked at me. As she squeezed her hands against her glass, the normally confident Effigy seemed at once like a timid child scared of sharing her secrets.
“Sorry,” she said. “It’s not something that’s easy for us to talk about. My family never discusses it and my mom never sees a doctor because they’re all against it. I don’t know, I can’t explain.”
“No, I get you.” Back then, on the grounds of Le Cirque de Minuit, Chae Rin had been more fixated on her family than on the prospect of Saul attacking more cities. And I’d never even bothered to consider why that would be.
“She’s just not well, you know. She stays at home a lot. My dad takes care of her. But she gets so much anxiety normally, and it’s just gotten worse since I became an Effigy.” Lying back, Chae Rin looked up at the clear sky, squinting under the glare of the sun. “She’s so worried and paranoid all the time. And me being who I am, getting in the news for screwing up some mission, getting suspended, beating someone up, destroying a car or several—it doesn’t help.”
“But you save people too,” I said hopefully. “They won’t just see the bad, you know. They’ll see the good. And the good far outweighs the bad.”
Chae Rin didn’t look convinced. “I don’t know. The thing is . . .” She went quiet, fiddling with her fingers. It took her a while to speak again. “Even with all the crap we deal with on a daily basis and all the times I screw up . . . I’d rather be here than at home taking care of her like my sister. My sister can handle it. But I . . . Sometimes my mom’s anxiety is scarier to me than chasing monsters.” She let out a sigh, shaking her head. “Gross, right? I’m totally awful, right? I mean, I want to see her. I love her. And I was happy that last day at the circus when I thought she’d come to watch me perform, but maybe that was because I knew she’d just be there for a day or two. How could I be more comfortable out here than at home with my own mother? I mean, look where we are!”
Chae Rin gestured at the Madrid skyline, at the shopping boutiques and Spanish markets around the corner down below, at the tiny specter of the magnificent APD tower we could now see, somewhat, in distance. “It’s one mess after another. Since Saul appeared, we’ve basically been nomads, hopping around the world trying to stop him. I feel like a sprite in a role-playing game.”
“I once had this dream that we were in the Metal Kolossos MMORPG and my player didn’t equip me with the right defense accessory and I ended up getting killed by a dark elf. Which is weird because there are no dark elves in the game.” But before I could go too far, I noticed Chae Rin staring at me. I stopped, pursing my lips together sheepishly.
“This may never end. But I . . . At some point, I should go home. I should do it. Right, Maia?”
Hearing her speak my name was more jarring than I’d anticipated. She usually called me “kid,” or maybe “moron.” A flush of surprise rose up my chest, but Chae Rin was serious. As she looked back at me, she had the world-weariness of someone who’d lived much longer than her eighteen years.
“Right now going home is only going to put our families in danger. So we’ll just have to work hard and end this thing as soon as possible. I know it’s difficult, but . . .” I breathed deeply, summoning what I needed for the hopeful smile I gave her. “I think if we stick together, it’ll be all right. Don’t worry, Chae Rin. We’re a team.”
Chae Rin raised an eyebrow, amused, before sipping her water and staring out over the terrace. That’s right. As insane as everything got, we could count only on each other. I had to admit that as dangerous as it was, traveling the world trying to stop Saul had given me something important: a purpose. Comrades. That became all too clear whenever I thought back to how things were just a year ago, those nights alone in my room, that terrible loneliness after my sister and parents were gone.
I wasn’t alone so much these days. It was a good feeling.
“Thanks, Chae Rin,” I whispered.
“Huh?” She set down her glass. “For what?”
But I was already feeling too embarrassed to elaborate. I got to my feet. “Come on—there are a lot of people on the streets now. Even if we’re all the way up here, we might get recognized.”
I tugged at her sleeve annoyingly, until she got up with a groan and followed me back to the door. For all of our sakes, we had to stop Saul. It was the only way we could go back to our families without looking over our shoulders—or theirs. But as long as we were in this battle, we had to rely on one another. It wasn’t only what I wanted; it was what I needed—the four of us together.
I didn’t want to lose anyone.
• • •
We left the bar just before sundown. Our suitcases were still there; the man who ran the bar said he’d keep them in the storage room for us, though Lake had had the good sense to take a few things she said we might need and stuff them into her knapsack. Strapping on our caps and black shades, we did some reconnaissance of the area, scanning bodies as they made their way to nightclubs and the restaurants surrounding the apartment building. No Jessie or Vasily. But we couldn’t be sure how many soldiers Saul had on his roster or who else knew we were in Madrid other than that handful of Sect agents. We’d have to be careful.
We were buzzed in almost the moment we got to the door. Naomi must have been there already. There wasn’t anyone in the narrow hallways, but we moved quickly, going up to the twelfth floor. Belle knew the way. She stood in front of Natalya’s door silently for a moment too long, her hands hovering close to the solid peach wood. I knocked for her.
A man in a black suit opened the door. A Sect agent? I could see his female partner standing by the wall silently, her shades covering her face.
The man nodded to his partner before stepping aside. His broad shoulders nearly bumped against the wall as he moved to let us through.
It was exactly the same as Natalya’s memories. The treelike coatrack on the far left-hand side. The steel fridge next to a little coffee table and a clear sink. Glamorous pop art hanging from the eggshell walls. Something in me stirred when I saw the familiar sights, the narrow hall that opened up into an expansive living room.
The living room.
A sudden vertigo hit me, my head spinning. The crystal decanter on the shelf that I knew was always filled with scotch. The stylish bookshelves and modern furniture, the ceiling that sloped down at one angle. And the chair. The one Natalya had been sitting in the night she’d died. It was in the same place, at the center of the room. Everything was in the same place. A memory, a former life. A crime scene.
“Maia, are you okay?” Lake had her knapsack dangling off one shoulder. Sliding it back up, she hooked my arm with hers so I wouldn’t fall over.
“Were you followed?”
Sucking in a sharp breath of air, I turned and saw her. Naomi. Still beautiful with her clean, youthful skin and long black hair that veiled her chest. In a plain mauve dress, she sat in a chair—not the chair, but a lonely settee by the tall set of windows that spanned almost the entire length of the wall. The nighttime city lights crept through slivers in the blinds, casting a glow across her. The lights in the living room were dim, but I could see her bright brown eyes.
“Were you followed?” she repeated, the urgency quiet but palpable in her voice.
“No,” Belle said.
Naomi paused and took in the sight of us all. “Maia.” She moved the shawl over her dress. “I expected you’d come alone.” Her eyes flicked fearfully toward Belle, and I instantly understood.
“Yeah, that’s not happening.” Chae Rin folded her arms. “You’re Rhys’s mom, right?”
“Maia said you were a member of the Council,” said Lake, still holding on to me.
Naomi shifted uncomfortably in her seat, turning her wedding ring around her middle finger. “Ah, is that so? What else did she tell you, I wonder?”
“Don’t get salty about it,” Chae Rin barked. “It’s not like we were going to let her come here alone, so you might as well spill what you know.”
I could stand up straight now, though Lake continued to link arms just in case. The place had the musty smell of an apartment that hadn’t been lived in for some time. I could feel traces of her here.
“Why here?” I asked her. “Why did you want to meet me here? And just me?”
Naomi stood up and walked to the window to look out over the city. “You feel her, don’t you?” she said without turning around. “Like a ghost in the shadows.”
I brought up a hand to my chest, my fingers curling around the fabric of my shirt. “You want me to scry.”
“It’s Marian we need, Maia, not Natalya. The other Effigy in your line. The first.”
First? I could feel Lake and Chae Rin glance at me, surprised. Belle’s gaze never wavered from Naomi.
“Why Marian?” I asked, but Naomi was too distracted to hear me, peering through the blinds, searching the streets below.
“We don’t have much time. I’m supposed to be back at home in Virginia by morning. I told my husband I wanted to stay in England for a little while longer, so he left without me. Nobody but James and Rosa know I’m here.” With a shift of her head, she indicated the two agents who stayed vigilant by the front door. “And I can’t be sure I wasn’t followed. So I’ll get through this quickly.”
“Yeah, talk, please.” Chae Rin tapped her foot impatiently. “Saul is out there planning something big; we can’t afford to stand around anymore.”
“But it’s not just Saul,” Naomi said, and I noticed her voice had dipped in volume. “There are members of the Sect helping him. Even members of the Council. This is much bigger than just him. You must have realized it. How could Saul alone have taken down the APDs of all those different cities?”
Even after what Uncle Nathan had told me about his job in the MDCC, I may not have known exactly how it all worked, but I knew that the city’s system was complex enough that it required networks of very smart technicians with very expensive computers to play with. Unless Saul could shut off complicated technology with the power of his mind, he’d need people from within the center, or maybe a special group from the outside hacking into multiple ones. It was the only explanation.
“It’s why Baldric fled,” Naomi said.
“Baldric.” Belle stepped around the coffee table. I watched each step she took toward the woman with anxious eyes. “Natalya mentioned him to a priest we know. Madame, who is this man?”
Naomi brought her hands up to her chest, her thumb caressing the ring around her finger. A nervous tic. “Baldric Haas. He’s also a member of the Council. Like my family, he’s been in service of the Sect since its inception. They are the only ones who knew about the last volume: the one Castor had written in secret.”
“A secret volume?” I looked at the other girls. “A thirteenth volume?”
Naomi nodded. “It’s said to carry the most dangerous secrets Castor couldn’t divulge even to the Sect. But as dangerous as it was, Castor wouldn’t destroy it. Instead, he entrusted it to the Haas family. They’ve been guarding it since, but eventually Baldric grew anxious.”
“What secrets?” Lake asked. “Like . . . like about us?”
“About you. About the phantoms. About the beginning of everything,” she said, her eyelids fluttering shut as she remembered. “Or so he told me. I can’t know for sure. He’s probably the only human alive who knows what’s inside those pages. But he’s always been a paranoid man, and he only trusted me to a point. He was the one who first told me at the beginning of this year that there were rumblings of treason within the Sect. That Saul appeared not long afterward isn’t a coincidence. Baldric was sure that the secrets in the volume were central to the happenings in the Sect, to Saul, to the attacks around the world. But he wouldn’t tell me how until he was sure the volume was safe in his hands.”
“You said you know how Natalya died.” Belle stopped by the chair Naomi had been sitting in, her hands brushing the top. “Can you tell me?”
It was only for a fleeting second—Naomi’s line of vision crossing with mine. Her eyes dimmed as she held her hands close to her sides to hide their slight tremble.
“Every generation of the Haas family places the volume in a new location to keep it safe. Baldric wanted to retrieve the volume from where he’d been hiding it—in Prague’s National Museum. But he’d fallen sick. Though he asked me to help him, if he really was being watched, it would be dangerous for me to go alone. On his behalf, I sent Natalya.” She watched Belle’s expression carefully as she spoke. “By then Natalya had already become suspicious about things. Around half a year ago, she came to me. After the Frankfurt attacks.”
“Frankfurt,” Belle said. “Sibyl told us. She confronted Saul then. Yes . . . just before the attack. Though he disappeared before she understood who or what he was.”
“I needed someone on my side,” explained Naomi. “I told her about the volume and asked her to bring it to me secretly, without the Sect knowing. But Natalya was a soldier. She was anxious about going against them . . . so I promised her what Baldric promised me—that with the volume, we’d know the truth. And that I would protect her from the Sect.”
She lowered her head.
“But you couldn’t,” Belle finished for her.
“She was intercepted and couldn’t retrieve it. Afterward, it was too risky to move. Baldric became jittery and finally fled Britain. Natalya would have tried again once the heat was off of her, but . . .”
“That’s when she was killed, right?” Chae Rin said. “She didn’t get a chance.”
Naomi took a shaky step forward. “I’m sorry, Belle. I know she was close to you. Like family.” Her eyes were glistening. “I’m sorry.”
“Do you know who killed her?”
Silence. Though Belle had sounded calm, I knew better than to take that stone mask as truth. Naomi said nothing, but I couldn’t keep this secret for much longer.
No. It wasn’t right. I had to confess.
My fingers clasped together, my body shivering from the stinging pain of my teeth biting into the corner of my lip. I couldn’t stay silent. No matter what my feelings were. No matter the consequences. I didn’t want to be a coward anymore. I had to trust Belle.
But when I opened my lips, the confession passed through Naomi’s instead.
“I did,” she said. Simple, bitter words.
The room went quiet. Seconds passed in silence.
An unbearable cold suddenly crashed into me as if I’d been caught in a torrent of wind. I closed my eyes, and when I opened them again, frost lined the bookshelves, clinging to the ceiling. Snow gathered on the furniture, the marble counters. And Belle’s sword was already at Naomi’s throat.
“Stop!” We all ran to Belle, but I got there first. My hand hooked her elbow, though it did nothing to deter the girl’s murderous gaze. Naomi’s bodyguards, who’d heard the commotion, were rushing through the narrow hallway, but before they could reach the living room, Belle covered the entrance with a barricade of ice to keep them out.
“Yes, I did it.” Naomi pressed her head back against the blinds, her lips trembling. “I sent her to Prague. I put her in danger. She died because of me.”
“Did you or did you not kill her?” Belle pressed her sword against Naomi’s neck just hard enough for a line of blood to form. It dripped down the edge of her blade. “Tell me. You either killed her or you know who did.”
“Oh my god, oh my god, oh my god.” Lake was bobbing up and down on her feet, freaking out. “Is Belle going to kill her? Please don’t kill anyone!”
“Belle, please stop!” I cried. “Natalya’s killer—”
“Doesn’t matter.” Naomi was looking at me now. “I killed her. My actions set her death in motion. It didn’t begin with Prague. It began years ago.” She was shaking. Tears started to dribble down her cheeks, mingling with the blood slipping down Belle’s sword. “Everything that happened . . . It’s because of my weakness. Because I can’t protect anyone. I never could. Not then. And not now.”
Did she mean Rhys? I frowned, my grip on Belle’s elbow failing. I tried to speak again, to fill in the blanks Naomi kept hidden. But as much as Naomi could against Belle’s blade, she shook her head.
“Please. Please don’t,” she said. She was talking to me. “It’s my fault. The sin is mine from beginning to end.”
“That’s not good enough,” Belle hissed.
“Stop.” Chae Rin stepped forward and grabbed the edge of Belle’s blade with barely a wince. “Stop, Belle. Enough with this crap.”
But despite her warning glare, Belle wouldn’t back down. “I promised myself that I would find Natalya’s killer. And murder them. No matter the cost. I will murder them.”
I took a stumbling step back, my feet heavy. So I was right.
“Well, that wouldn’t be productive, would it?” Chae Rin said. But they were at a stalemate. Neither would budge to the other. “Lady,” she said without looking at Naomi. “You said you sent Natalya to Prague. That’s where the secret volume is, right? What if we get it?”
Naomi spoke very carefully. “Baldric told me that the information in it could help us fight whatever is coming. And that we couldn’t allow the Council to get their hands on it. Baldric is gone. Off the grid. I can’t just ask him. We need the volume or—”
Chae Rin kept a firm grip on the blade. “Or?”
“Marian. Baldric mentioned it, that Marian knows the secrets that even he does not. I would have asked Natalya, but—” Her breath hitched as Belle’s grip tightened around her sword. “Maia . . . Maia could scry right here.”
“That would take too long!” Lake said. “You said Marian was the first fire Effigy, right?”
Belle had told me once during training that I would have to go through each Effigy. But I couldn’t even get past Natalya, not when she was still plotting to take me over. I held my head in my hands.
“Belle, let’s get the special volume,” Chae Rin said.
“No.”
“Damn it!” In one quick movement, Chae Rin pushed Naomi out of the way with her elbow and with her great strength broke the sword’s blade. It dissipated—cold frost into the air. She’d pushed Naomi so hard, the woman had tripped and fallen to the floor, her hand grasping the window ledge as she tried to reorient herself, but Belle was already stalking toward her.
“I said stop.” With her bloody hand, Chae Rin grabbed Belle’s collar and pushed her against the window, but Belle’s fingers were already curled around her shirt. The tension was palpable, as chilling as the air around us. My feet wouldn’t move. I was too scared to even tell them to.
“Oh, come on!” Lake gripped the straps of her knapsack, her voice trembling with fear.
“You know what, Belle? I’m getting real tired of your crap,” Chae Rin spat. “You want to kill a woman because she blames herself for someone’s death. Clearly she didn’t murder anyone, but you still want to cut her open. What the hell is wrong with you? It’s not like you—”
“To be this cold?” Belle’s lips curved into a small smile. Not a nice one. “Surely you of all people know better than that.”
“Yeah, you’re a bitch,” Chae Rin said. “And that’s usually fine. But you’re not a murderer. You’ve been acting freaking bizarre since we got back from France—no, since Natalya’s death. Like what you did in that desert hideout? And that wasn’t the only mission where you jumped the gun. You’ve been good at hiding it so far, but you’re slipping, Belle. I know it. They know it too.”
She flicked her head toward us. It was true. Belle had been off since Natalya’s death—especially once she found out her mentor’s suicide was a murder.
I thought back to that night in France by the river. Belle had taught me to scry, but it wasn’t to reach Marian. The way she’d shaken me, pleaded with me. The desperation.
She was still desperate.
“So what are you going to do?” Chae Rin tightened her grip. “You’re going to kill a director’s wife? And then we all get stuck in a jail cell while the Sect continues to fall apart when we have less than seven days to stop whatever Saul is planning?”
“Why not?”
“I want to go home.” The word sounded as if it’d been somehow mangled coming up Chae Rin’s throat. She was shaking. “I want to see my family. My mother.”
“Me too,” Lake whispered. “I’m an only child. I’m all my parents have, and they’ve been so patient this whole time.” She sounded close to tears.
“We can’t do that until we get Saul once and for all,” Chae Rin continued. “And your selfish shit is going to get in the way of that.”
“But you all have families,” Belle whispered. “That woman took mine. She admitted it.”
Naomi held in her sobs. She couldn’t speak. So I did.
“Belle . . .” I swallowed hard, glancing at Naomi, who shook her head ever so slightly. She was begging me. I balled my hands into fists. “I know what it’s like to lose people. My family died, remember?”
But even I had Uncle Nathan. Most of my grandparents were still alive. I wasn’t completely alone. But Belle was. She didn’t even know where she’d come from.
“Getting revenge isn’t going to change anything. Please. I hate this.” Tears trickled down my cheeks. “We’re supposed to stick together. You guys are the only friends I have. My sister’s gone. . . .”
I felt Lake’s comforting hand on my shoulder. The thought of June made me suddenly feel faint and weak. It was that phantom pain again, like I just found out I was missing an arm. “Don’t fight. We have to stay together. I . . .” I inhaled. “I don’t want to lose anyone else.”
That was enough. It felt like the tension was finally starting to dissolve. Belle’s body relaxed, and Chae Rin let her go. We stood awkwardly in silence, pairs of eyes avoiding each other. I walked over to Naomi and helped her stand.
“Belle,” Naomi started.
“Quiet,” Belle hissed, brushing herself off and stalking away from the window.
“No, I need to say this.” Naomi kept her hand firmly around my wrist. “As a member of the Council, I watched Natalya, I’ve watched you—all of you—swear allegiance to the Sect. And then I’d sit in my ivory tower and let you all fight and die for the cause we gave to you.”
It was hard to forget the vast emptiness I felt as I knelt before Blackwell and the seven members of the Council in Ely Cathedral. Naomi’s had been the only soothing voice among the cacophony of judgments. Maybe this was how she’d felt that day, when she alone had tried to give me something to hold on to.
“I never understood just how heavy that burden was until I learned of the death of one Effigy, Jemma Moretti. One of the Effigies of wind before you, Victoria. Suicide.” Naomi gripped my wrist tighter. “Perhaps it was the funeral. I can still hear her mother’s wailing. And since then I’ve wanted to do right by you. By all of you. When Natalya first became an Effigy, she used her power to kill a mobster who’d held her family in debt.”
“What? I didn’t know that,” I said. And by the way Belle frowned, it didn’t look like she did either.
“I covered it up. I thought doing little things like this would help ease my guilt . . . help me feel useful again. Maybe that’s why, when Baldric suggested that there could be corruption in the Sect, the very organization that marched little girls to their deaths, I wanted to do what I could. But in the end, nothing’s changed. I sent Natalya to her death like all the others. And now I could be sending you straight into danger.”
Finally, she let go of my wrist and moved toward the other set of windows, her black hair glimmering under the moonlight streaming through the blinds.
“I may never be able to atone for anything I’ve done,” Naomi said. “But there’s nothing I can do on my own other than this. I have to lean on you again, Effigies. I’m sorry, but please . . . please find the volume. There’s a secret passageway beyond the museum that only Baldric knows, but he told Natalya, which means he’s told you, Maia.” Naomi looked at me meaningfully. “Get it before the Sect does. If what Baldric said is true, it could be the key to stopping all of this. I have to believe that. I just—”
She was looking at Belle, the pain of too many lives lost sinking into the wells of her eyes. “My only wish is that we could find a way to stop this painful cycle. Girls being trained and sent to the slaughter. Fighting and dying. Pain and revenge. If only it would end.”
“End . . . ,” Belle said as if the word were foreign to her.
Naomi closed her eyes. “It needs to change,” she said. “All of it. Baldric said so himself before he disappeared. The Sect. Humanity.” Her lips trembled. “Our world needs a revival. If only . . . if only we were . . . free.”
A deafening round of shots exploded through the window, but only three pierced Naomi’s body. None of us moved. None of us could figure out what was happening. Not until Naomi hit the ground.