Chapter Four – Dean

“Are you OK?” Dean asked, as he walked across to where she stood, watching Suzie’s car disappear into the distance.

“Yes,” Elizabeth said confidently, but her voice wavered.

“No pressure, just dinner,” Dean promised. Although he wanted more; he was struggling to keep his need for her contained, he’d waited so long, and somewhere, at some time, he had given up hope of ever finding his mate. He’d figured fate had a different path for him to follow. Now he knew he’d simply gone the long way around.

“Just dinner. I can do that.” She tried to sound self-assured, but he could see the panic in her eyes, he’d seen it in scared kids enough times to know. “Shall I follow you there?”

“You can, but it would be easier if we took your car.” He cracked a smile. “I walked here.”

“Oh, I assumed. Because of the rose bush…” She nodded. “Right. Here’s my car.” She led him to her old reliable Ford. “This is me.”

“OK, if ever you need any work done on it, I’m your man.” He tilted his head and smiled at her surprise. “What? Do you think I’m just a male nanny?”

“No. At least I didn’t think you were a nanny at all.” Elizabeth studied him. “You are a man of surprises.”

“Not really, I’m totally predictable, but I’ve learned a lot over the years. Sometimes it’s easier to relate to kids if you share an interest. Getting your hands dirty while you fix something is a great way to bond.”

Elizabeth opened the car door and got in. “Is that what planting the rose was all about?”

He chuckled. “No, that was because I wanted to do something for Suzie. And it is one of my favorite roses.” He got in the passenger seat, and immediately the enclosed space of the car made him intensely aware of her.

“Suzie admires you a great deal.” Elizabeth started the engine and pulled away from Karen’s house.

“And I admire her. And her mom.” Dean glanced across at Elizabeth, studying her expression. He’d met kids like her before. Kids who were reluctant to let people in. But she was his mate, and he had to find a way to get under her skin. He wanted her to want him as much as he wanted her.

What if that never happened?

Dean had a fleeting moment of terror. He could understand how Zak, one of his former foster kids, had felt when he realized Louise was his mate. Louise wasn’t a shifter, and he’d kept the truth from her at first, because he didn’t want to freak her out. Dean was lucky, Elizabeth at least knew about shifters. That didn’t mean she would blindly go along with the life fate had set out for them.

“I haven’t done anything special,” Elizabeth told him firmly. “I just did what any other mom would’ve done.”

“Hey, don’t sell yourself short. I have fostered kids on my own for a number of years. Believe me, I know how hard it is to be a single parent.”

“You must love kids.” Elizabeth came to a stop at the end of the street. “Which way?”

Dean quickly gave her instructions and she turned left and followed the road that headed toward his home. “I do love kids. I love helping them become better people. I love seeing them blossom. Especially shifter kids. It’s a difficult time when you are on your own, and this change comes over you. I mean all kids sprout hair where they’ve never had it before at puberty, but shifter kids get claws and tails too.”

“Did you want to stop in town?” Elizabeth came to a stop at an intersection: left took them into Bear Creek, right took them home. Or at least to his home, Sunnyside, where he hoped Elizabeth would one day live too.

“That depends on what you want for dinner.” Dean could rustle something up out of the staples he kept in his kitchen, but since this was the first meal he was going to cook for his mate, he wanted it to be special. But he didn’t want to overwhelm Elizabeth. She’d had enough shocks for one day.

“I’m easy. I had a frozen meal planned for this evening, so anything will be an improvement.” She looked at him, allowing her hair to fall down over the left side of her face. “What I’m trying to say, badly, is it is your call.” Elizabeth smiled ruefully. “I want to shake off this fear of meeting new people. But it’s like it’s ingrained on my soul.”

Her words were about the most honest anyone had ever spoken to him, and he’d heard a lot of words, listened to a lot of reasons why people thought they acted the way they did. Dean reached out for her hand and took it in his own, wanting to send her warmth and love. “It’s not something you can flip a switch on. I understand that. Let me help you.”

Elizabeth gave a short laugh. “I don’t think anyone can help me.” Her eyes sparkled with tears. “I know I’m a coward.”

“No, Elizabeth. No. Don’t say that. You raised a wonderful daughter, and you did it alone.” He shrugged. “Sometimes we just can’t see the way forward, we only see the walls we’ve put up for ourselves.” He squeezed her hand. “Did I tell you I’m good with a sledgehammer?”

Elizabeth swiped at a tear that rolled down her cheek. “Are you offering to break down my walls?”

“I most certainly am.” He let out a long sigh. “And I can’t wait to see what’s behind them.”

Elizabeth giggled, which turned into a laugh. A slightly hysterical laugh. “I have no idea who I am anymore. Before Suzie met Kit it was all so easy. All so compartmentalized. And now it’s as if bits of my life are strewn in all different directions, and I don’t know how to fit it back together.” She rested her forehead on the steering wheel. “I don’t know who I am.”

A car horn sounded behind them, which made her jump, and she sat back up, raised her hand in acknowledgment, and pulled out onto the road heading toward Bear Creek. Dean was pleased she had made the decision to go to town without him telling her.

“If you pull over outside the bakery, we can get some fresh bread. Then we need to visit the grocery store.” He talked as if it was completely natural for them to be going to town together. In his experience, it was better to act normal, be completely chill, rather than make a big deal out of situations that might not occur.

But if Elizabeth needed him to make a big deal of it, he would. He was just going to follow her lead.

She parked the car just beside the bakery, and switched off the engine, slipping the keys into her purse. Then she gazed out of the window, looking along the street. Dean took his seatbelt off and put his hand on the car door. “Ready?”

She looked nervous, but smiled. “As I’ll ever be.”

Elizabeth pushed her car door open and got out. Dean couldn’t help noticing she walked with her head slightly bent forward so that her shoulder-length hair fell around her face. It was cut and styled to curl around her cheeks, and he longed to brush his fingers through her chestnut locks and push her hair back from her beautiful face.

However, this was not the time. He could not help her change overnight. Experience told him that patience and love were the two best gifts you could give an insecure person.

Walking around the car, he moved to stand next to her on the sidewalk, and he reached out for her hand. Wordlessly, she looked at his hand and then at his face. Whatever she read in his eyes must have helped, because she slipped her hand into his with a weak smile.

“I’ve never held hands on the street with anyone other than Suzie,” Elizabeth admitted.

“Get used to it,” Dean told her with a look of possession that made her swallow hard.

Don’t blow it, his bear told him.

I don’t intend to, but hell, it’s hard to control myself.

The funny thing was, he was a master at teaching others the art of self-control and patience. He needed to learn to take his own advice.

“Sorry. This is all new to me too.” He thought about his own past. “You know, I can’t remember that last time I ever walked along a street holding hands either. My foster kids would have run for those mountains if I ever tried to get them to hold my hand.”

“I bet they would.” Elizabeth looked down at their hands. “Today has been all about new experiences.”

“And the night is still young.” She blushed at his words. “I was thinking about my cooking.”

“Are you a good cook?” Elizabeth asked as they walked toward the bakery.

“I like to think so. Although I don’t make fancy dishes. Just good old-fashioned home cooking, that the kids used to like coming home to.” He grinned. “Don’t worry, I’m not going to cook hot dogs or pizza.”

“I like both.”

“OK, a lady after my own heart. That’s good to know.” Dean pushed open the door of the bakery and held it for her. “Let me cook something special tonight, though. It’s been a while since I’ve had a proper adult to experiment on.”

“Your house, your dinner, your rules.” Elizabeth brushed past him as she entered the bakery, and he inhaled her scent. His mouth watered, more than it would over the fancy dinner he was planning to cook tonight.

As he closed the door and said hi to Mrs. Closh, he wanted to pinch himself to check if this was real.

Oh, it’s real, all right, his bear said with a sigh.

Great, two lovesick fools: the chances of them embarrassing themselves had just shot through the roof.