Saeed’s control had been obliterated the moment his fangs pierced Cerys’s skin. The sensation of her pussy gliding over his shaft, the softness of her bare skin, her scent, and then, her taste as her blood flowed over his tongue, drove him past reason. He’d become a single-minded beast whose focus centered on finding a way to banish the desperate ache that ate away at him and fill the hollow space that consumed him.
He thrust home and a sense of such intense relief washed over him that it took him a moment to gain his bearings. The sensory overload was almost more than he could handle and the way Cerys’s pussy encased his shaft caused a shiver to race from the top of Saeed’s spine to the backs of his heels.
“You feel so good, I can barely breathe.”
Not that he needed to, but it was the truth. The impact of this moment left him stunned. He’d known with so much certainty that Cerys was meant for him and yet he’d never felt the all-consuming impact of that truth until now. He wanted her with a ferocity that was unlike anything he’d ever felt. Saeed respected order. Self-control. He’d always been calm, unflappable, and self-possessed. But since the moment of his turning, he’d become a creature ruled by instinct and need. The Collective had ruled him for so long, but now it was Cerys who held sway over him. She was the center of his universe.
Cerys hooked her ankles over his thighs and thrust her hips. Saeed sucked in a sharp breath and moved against her, pressing into her as deeply as he could go. She answered with an indulgent moan that sent a tingle over his skin and tightened his sac. She was exquisite. Without equal.
Mine.
Tethered or not, Cerys belonged to him.
“Fuck me, Saeed.” Her brazen words reignited his lust. “I want you hard and deep.”
He moved against her, slowly at first. It was a sweet torture to force himself to enjoy her body and not simply sate his lust. He pulled out to the tip and dove back in, a slow glide that elicited another delicious moan from Cerys. He loved her passion. Her fire. Her unabashed nature.
He adopted an easy pace, determined to fuck her so thoroughly that she’d never think of another male save him. Cerys’s back arched with every deep thrust and her low moans quickly transformed into tight whimpers and desperate cries. She gripped his shoulders, her nails digging into his skin, and Saeed welcomed the gentle bite of pain.
Saeed propped himself up on an arm. He stared into Cerys’s eyes, held her gaze and took in her blissful expression with every measured thrust he delivered. Her tongue flicked out at her lips and Saeed couldn’t resist but to put his mouth to hers and capture a bit of that sweetness on his tongue. His fangs nicked her and the taste of her blood encouraged him to bite down again, harder. She moaned into his mouth as he sucked at her bottom lip, closing the punctures as quickly as he’d opened them.
Cerys’s back arched as she ground her hips into Saeed. He sensed her urgency in every roll of her hips, every tight breath, and her grip on his shoulders as she pulled her body as close to his as she could get it. “More, Saeed.” Her desperate plea shot through him like lightning. “I’m so close.”
Pride surged in Saeed’s chest that he could please her. He fucked her hard and deep, his pace measured but not too slow. Cerys’s breath hitched and her body went taut. Saeed took in the sight of her, cheeks flushed, eyes wide, full lips parted with her breath. The natural luster of her skin sparkled in the darkness and only lent to her ethereal aura. She was a goddess. Perfect. Exquisite in her passion. And she was his.
“Oh gods, Saeed!”
Cerys threw her head back as she let out a desperate cry. Each powerful contraction of her sex squeezed Saeed’s cock until he didn’t think he could take another second of the intense sensation. A rush of wet warmth bathed his shaft and Saeed drove faster, deeper, until his sac grew tight and his thighs shook from the effort. He toppled over the edge a moment after her. He let out a horse shout as he pumped unmercifully into her, riding out his own pleasure as wave after powerful wave crashed over him.
“Mine.” The word left his mouth without any thought as to how it might sound. He collapsed on top of Cerys, his own breath racing in his chest as he rested his lips against the outer shell of her ear. “You are mine.”
“Yes.” Her voice was thick with emotion. “I’m yours, Saeed.” She drew in a shuddering breath that made Saeed’s own chest ache. “I’m yours.”
They were both lost. Both hollow. Both coping as best they could with being incomplete. But in the quiet dark of Saeed’s bedroom, his body resting on hers, the only sound their mingling breaths, he felt whole. It was the closest thing to love Saeed had ever known.
Would he need his soul returned to know for sure?
He pushed those troubling thoughts to the back of his mind. He refused to let doubt or worry ruin the moment. Instead, he focused on Cerys. The softness of her skin against his, the rise and fall of her chest, the sensation of her fingertips as they glided down his spine. Saeed braced his palm on the floor to push himself up and Cerys grabbed onto his arm to stop him.
“Don’t.” Her voice was little more than a whisper. “Just stay like you are for a while.”
Saeed settled back down on top of her and cradled the back of her neck in his palm. “I’m not hurting you?”
“No.” Her head came up from the floor as she placed a gentle kiss on his shoulder. “I want to feel your weight against me.”
She was so slight compared to his bulk. Despite the comfort he felt, Saeed worried that he would hurt her. He indulged her for several moments before shifting to his side. He wrapped his arms around her, keeping her body close to his as he rolled. He might not have wanted to hurt her, but Saeed still craved the skin on skin contact.
“You have no idea how bad I needed that.”
Saeed gave a low chuckle. “I know better than you think.” He’d needed it just as badly. “And I’m not even close to sated.”
Cerys’s fingers teased the strands of his hair that brushed his neck. Saeed let out a slow sigh as he put his lips to her forehead. “Not even close?” He loved her teasing tone. “You must not want me to be able to walk out of here on my own steam.”
The thought of shutting themselves away in the bedroom and fucking until neither of them could move only served to reignite Saeed’s desire. He reached up and brushed her untamed hair from her face. “The sun will soon be up.” A fact he wished he could change. “And I’ll have no choice but to sleep.”
“What’s it like?”
He’d never had to explain the phenomenon of daylight sleep to anyone. “It’s not as traumatic as you might think.” Saeed knew from glimpses into the Collective that the pull of sleep was different for each vampire. “As the sun rises, I feel an immense sense of exhaustion. Weariness steals over me, my limbs become heavy, and I am relaxed.”
“I guess that doesn’t sound too bad.” Cerys’s fingers wandered from his hairline down the back of his neck and across his shoulder. Pleasant chills broke out on Saeed’s skin and he drew in a slow breath. “I sort of wish I could feel like that at the end of my day.”
“You don’t?”
Cerys let out a soft snort. “Hardly.” Saeed pulled away to look at her and found her expression so full of sadness that it twisted his gut. “I’m always too wound up to sleep. My brain won’t slow down enough for me to relax.”
“What do you think about?” Saeed wanted to know every thought she’d ever had. Craved that intimacy with her.
“I think a better question is what don’t I think about?” Cerys averted her gaze and let out a slow breath. “Thousands of years of soulless servitude gives a girl a lot to contemplate.”
Saeed didn’t press her for more. Instead, he gave her a moment with her thoughts.
“Being with you sort of grounds me though,” Cerys said as though the admission were tough to make. “I’m not as tense, not as worried, and I don’t feel like I have to eat every five seconds.”
Two simple sentences spoke volumes. Once again, Saeed felt a sense of pride that he could offer her some kind of comfort no matter how small. “You should sleep.” As much as he wanted to spend the few precious hours they had together in deep conversation, touching, kissing, sucking, Saeed knew the greatest gift he could give her was rest. There would be many more nights spent together. He believed that with his entire being. Once he freed her soul and took her away from Rin once and for all, they could talk, touch, and kiss without worry for as long as they wanted. “I know you’re tired.” She’d almost died tonight depleting her energy for Rin’s foolish greed. Saeed had been no better in his own greed for her body. “Sleep.”
“It’s past my curfew.” Her rueful laughter filled his ears. “How pathetic does that sound? Like I’m a teenager out past her bedtime.”
“Rin enslaved you.” Anger rose from the pit of his stomach to choke the air from Saeed’s lungs. “That’s not pathetic, it is an injustice.”
“Either way, it sucks.”
It certainly did. And Saeed wasn’t going to let it continue for a moment longer. “I don’t want you to worry about Rin, or anything else tonight. Sleep in my arms, and let me watch over you.”
* * *
Saeed’s offer was tempting. Too tempting. Already Cerys’s lids tugged downward, heavy with fatigue. It felt so good to simply lay here in his arms. Feel the comfort of his presence. The protection of his strength.
“If I don’t go back, he’ll kill us both.” Her words lacked conviction and they ran together in a lazy string.
“I think we both know you’re much too valuable to him for him to ever consider harming you.
Cerys gave a sleepy laugh. “Maybe. Maybe not. That doesn’t mean he won’t go after you, though.”
Saeed offered up an unconcerned shrug. “He can try to hurt me. He won’t be successful, but he can try.”
So arrogant. Cerys’s lips curved into a smile. “I should go.”
“Stay.” Saeed’s lips found her temple. He kissed her there, down along her jaw line, to the corner of her mouth. “Please.”
His arms held her tighter and Cerys had never felt so at ease, so cared for, so sheltered. She didn’t want to leave. She was right where she belonged. “Maybe for a few minutes.” What could an hour hurt? Rin usually gave her a little leeway when she had a difficult job to do. She couldn’t bring herself to move even an inch. Not when it felt so amazing to have Saeed’s arms around her.
His contented sigh settled over her like a warm blanket. She was still pretty wiped out from everything that had happened tonight. A few more minutes of rest was exactly what she needed.
“Tell me more about your coven.” She loved the soothing quality of Saeed’s deep voice. She looked for any excuse for him to speak to her. “How did you become the coven master?”
A space of silence passed. Cerys settled into Saeed’s embrace and rested her head against his strong shoulder. She could lie like this forever. The thought of leaving after even a few minutes caused her stomach to tie into an anxious knot.
“I became coven master out of necessity. Not because I had any grandiose plans to amass power.” His fingers stroked idly through her hair and Cerys let out a slow sigh. “So many of us were thrown to the wind after the slayers attempted their genocide. We were scattered, directionless, hopeless, and desperate. It was obvious that there was at least one vampire still alive. Otherwise we would’ve all starved. Mikhail was hidden from us for nearly a century and there were few dhampirs with the fortitude necessary to regroup and protect those of us who were left.”
Cerys could only imagine the trauma they must have experienced. Rin had made it a point to keep the company of vampires throughout the years. She had no idea why other than the fact he found them fascinating. But when the berserkers unleashed their fury on the vampires, Rin had made sure to sever all contact. He’d turned his back on those he’d befriended, more concerned with saving his own neck than saving an entire race from extinction.
“At one point vampires populated the world.” The lulling quality of Saeed’s voice relaxed Cerys much like slipping into a tub of warm water. Her eyelids grew heavier as her breathing became more even. “As our numbers dwindled, so did our territories. The slayers effectively corralled us through our need to draw from each other’s strength.”
Cerys could see how others would look to Saeed for leadership. He exuded strength and confidence. “I’m sure there are many dhampirs who thought you were a natural choice to lead.”
Saeed’s gentle laughter rumbled in his chest. “I don’t know about that. I merely did what I thought was right and helped to steer us when we had no direction.”
One of the things Cerys admired about Saeed was his sense of honor. She’d lived so long in Rin’s company, a male who had none. Saeed reminded her there were those in this world who were better than their selfish machinations. Her fingertips stroked from his bare torso up and over the swell of one pec, and across his collarbone. “I’m sure those under your care love you all the more for accepting leadership.”
“Perhaps at one time.” The sadness in his voice speared through her chest. “I abandoned them when they needed me most.”
“Because of me.” Guilt welled hot and thick in Cerys’s throat. It was selfish of her to want to be here with him in this moment when his coven needed him.
“No.” He squeezed her tight against him. “Because I could not remain there while I was incomplete. Because I could no longer lead them when my mind refused to leave the Collective. Because the absence of my soul weighed heavily on me and I knew that its return relied on action.”
He’d left his coven with such faith in his success and Cerys feared that once he realized he would never free her soul from Rin’s captivity, it would break him. “Saeed.” Cerys’s heart ached as she forced the words past her lips. “Rin will never let me go.” The faster he acknowledged that truth, the sooner he could return to those who needed him.
Saeed stroked an idle finger over the swell of her shoulder and Cerys shivered. “Rin has no choice in the matter.”
Gods, his confidence. It almost made Cerys believe. “I’ve belonged to him for so long I can’t remember what freedom feels like.” Saeed had given her a small taste of what her life could be like without Rin. She couldn’t let herself become hopeful. Because Cerys knew their dreams would shatter and, like Saeed, it would ruin her.
“Cerys, I promise—”
“Don’t.” Cerys put her fingertips to his lips. She couldn’t bear to hear him promise her anything. Not when he believed so adamantly in his success while she doubted it so wholeheartedly. It wasn’t that she didn’t have faith in him. On the contrary, Cerys believed Saeed could move mountains if he put his mind to it. But she also knew Rin would rather kill her himself than allow her to belong to anyone else. “Just let me lie here next to you. Let me feel your arms around me while I rest.” She really was exhausted. If she didn’t get a little bit of sleep, she wouldn’t make it back to Rin’s on her own steam.
Her fingers fell away from Saeed’s lips. She let out a slow, measured breath and with its release, her body relaxed against him. The thought of forever with Saeed made her feel full to bursting. But the reality was that the only forever they would ever have would be encompassed in minutes rather than centuries.
“Why were you angry at the world? When you were an assassin during the Crusades. What happened to you that made you want to take vengeance on those you hunted?” She’d wanted to know why since the night he’d mentioned it and Cery knew she’d never get another chance to hear the story. Tonight was their forever, and as soon as she could walk out of here on her own two feet, it would come to an end. Tears pricked once again at Cerys’s eyes but she refused to let them fall. She refused to taint the beautiful gift of freedom, no matter how fleeting, Saeed had given her with even an ounce of sadness.
“I was angry at humanity.” Cerys wondered at his reluctant tone as though he was embarrassed to admit it. “For their religious wars, their prejudices, their secrets and lies. As though the gods care about such petty squabbles.” Saeed’s words faded to silence. “I was tired of the constant invasions, those who encroached on our peace. Our coven master cared not for the affairs of humans and said we should allow them to annihilate each other, but I couldn’t stand by and watch as so many were slaughtered under the guise of a religious crusade. Wars are always about two things: power and greed. I can tolerate neither. And so, I became an assassin and did what I could to send those who didn’t belong from the land that I loved because I longed to restore some sort of peace.
“In the end, nothing I did mattered. The course of fate will not be stopped. The Sortiari proved that point several centuries later when they waged war on us. And yet again, I was forced to stand by and watch the slaughter of innocents. Which is why I became a coven master myself. I wanted to protect those who were left.”
Cerys’s heart pounded in her chest. He was the most admirable male she’d ever known. She made a vow to herself in the quiet aftermath of Saeed’s story: No matter what happened, she’d do whatever she could to make sure he got back to his coven. Where he belonged.
“I wish I had my soul, Saeed.” Cerys fell closer to sleep and she wasn’t afraid to say the words out loud. “Because if I did, I think I would love you.”