Chapter 7
Mari entered her room with tears stinging in her eyes. Asking herself how in the world was she going to deal with this? She couldn’t sleep, because the crazy dreams were happening. She couldn’t let her guard down at all, because they weren’t just happening when she was asleep. She couldn’t touch people, be around Ben. Her mind raced with all the implications her loss of control was having on her life.
She grabbed her phone off the dresser and flopped down on her bed with a sob of desperation. Embarrassed or not, her fingers were dialing Ben regardless. He was the one person she had always confided in. Her family was great, but Mari learned that you can’t vent to your family about your family. It just didn’t work that way. The trickiest part of her friendship before their encounter the night before had been how to vent to him without letting on what she was.
Mari, being part of one of the Fae families meant to keep magical creatures a secret, couldn’t be the person to run around with a human and let him in on the secret inner workings of the Fae world. Mari had learned that she could vent about personality conflicts though, and those arose often with a young sister, and five over protective and vastly different brothers.
She inhaled deeply, watching a few tears roll off her face and onto the bed beneath her. She wiped furiously at them as she listened to the faint ringing impatiently. Relief flooded through Mari when she finally heard Ben’s voice on the other line.
“Hey, I was afraid you weren’t going to call,” Ben said with a measure of anxiety in his voice.
Mari was mentally kicking herself for leaving things so awkwardly with Ben. She couldn’t understand how she could have done that to him, but had a sinking feeling that she wasn’t exactly firing on all cylinders for the past week.
“Ben, I’m so sorry,” Mari gushed as soon as he was through talking, “I didn’t mean for that to happen. I can’t imagine what you must think of me. I don’t even know how to explain it, everything is just so wrong right now, and I have no idea what to do.”
“You’re sorry? I should be the one apologizing, Mar. You were sleeping and I feel like I took advantage or something,” Ben explained, inhaling deeply to gather the courage to say the words he had planned, “I just thought maybe you were finally starting to feel the same way about me, but that’s not the case and that is fine.”
Mari felt the weight of the words he was saying hit her like a ton of bricks. She hadn’t realized that Ben felt anything more for her at all. She considered Ben attractive but hadn’t given it much thought since she knew she was expected to marry another Fae. The idea hadn’t ever seriously crossed her mind that there was another choice.
“What do you mean feel the same way about you?”
Her question hung in the silence between them on the phone line. She heard Ben inhaling slowly, and could imagine him closing his eyes the way he always did when he was trying to say something carefully. She had known him since childhood, and in many ways, knew him far better than her brothers at times. No one had ever questioned her having him as a friend so long as she was careful, and her mother, before she had passed away, had insisted on the friendship for as long as she could remember.
“I don’t really want to talk about it. We’re friends, that’s it, and I honestly wouldn’t want to ever do anything to risk that,” Ben said with a sigh, “Don’t worry about it, okay?”
Mari was trying to process what he was saying but she wasn’t entirely sure she believed him. She had a sinking suspicion that Ben had much more complicated feelings for her than just friendship, and that realization made her realize just how cruel her actions the night prior had been. Mari felt guilt gnawing at her as she tried to think of what to say.
“Anyway, what do you mean everything is wrong? What’s going on with you? You didn’t get a chance to tell me the other night, but you seem upset. I’d much rather talk about whatever it is that Eryn has done this time. He’s so much fun to talk about,” Ben said in a forced attempt to change the topic of conversation.
Mari’s thoughts reeled back to why she had been so upset before she called Ben to begin with. She couldn’t possibly figure out how to explain it without telling him what she was in the process. She settled back on the bed crossing her legs under her, and rubbed her temple with two fingers attempting to squeeze the stress out.
“You wouldn’t believe me if I told you,” she sighed with a bitter laugh, “Let’s just say I have officially had the most awkward family dinner in the history of all family dinners. The only way it could have been worse is if Eryn had been there to give me shit about it.”
“Oh, come on now, Elwood. You can’t leave me hanging like that. I need details. That sounds far too interesting.”
Mari could hear Ben’s tension dying down as their banter returned to some semblance of normal between them. She wasn’t sure how to explain everything, without poking at whatever emotional wound she had caused Ben the night before but she knew he wouldn’t give in on her opening up about it.
“Ugh,” she groaned, “I don’t even know where to start. It was so bad. I’m having these weird dreams that keep happening. Kind of the like other night, where I can’t control myself and things get very intense. Vocally intense? And I may have had one in the middle of conversation around the dinner table. Think like that scene in that old movie we watched…but so much worse.”
Ben laughed deeply at her flustered explanation. He felt even guiltier over having taken advantage of her dream the night before, but pushed the emotion down. He knew exactly what movie she was talking about and it made the situation all the funnier for him. He had never met all of Mari’s family, but had met Val and had vivid mental images of what they all looked like. The idea of her having anything even remotely like an orgasm in the middle of a family dinner was hilarious, no matter what way he sliced it.
“Did anyone ask if they could have what you’re having?” Ben chuckled, knowing full and well just how much it was going to irritate her. Ben was, if nothing else, extremely gifted at distracting Mari from anything negative she was trying to dwell on. Humor was just a part of him, and it wasn’t in him to let something that had so much natural humor be taken so seriously.
“Ben! That is not funny!” Mari fumed as Ben continued laughing at her expense a little. She felt the sharp sting of embarrassment receding marginally. It was much more difficult to stay embarrassed when she was laughing at herself.
“It’s a little funny, and you know it.”
Mari sighed closing her eyes, and shaking her head slowly at the ridiculousness of her life in general. She heard a faint knocking at her door and groaned lightly.
“Ugh…I have to go. Are we okay, though?” She asked, hoping that her friend was back to just being her rock who would catch her every time she needed it. Mari took Ben for granted in many ways, and had never thought about how he looked at their friendship, after all this time.
“Of course,” Ben reassured her before his tone shifted to teasing, “Go handle what you need to. Just try not to handle it too much or you’ll have the same problem.”
“Seriously?” Mari asked in exasperation, “You’re awful. I’ll talk to you later.”
“Always, but you know you love me. Catch you later, Mar,” Ben replied before hanging up.
Mari shook her head slightly again and tossed the phone aside on the bed. She would have been perfectly content to sit around and dwell on how ridiculous Ben had been, but there was another knock on her door. Shame was itching at her as she fought with the urge to simply not answer and just hide from everyone for the rest of her life.
“Come in,” she sighed in frustration, feeling only minutely better that it was her uncle who opened the door and that he was alone. Of anyone who had been there for what happened, he was probably the only one she had a chance at talking about it with, without feeling like she needed to climb in into a hole and bury herself there.
Illwyn crossed the room quietly and sat on the corner of Mari’s bed. He had no idea what the right way to start this conversation was, but he had to start somewhere and break the awkward silence that was deepening between them. He cleared his throat quietly, hoping that he could get through this without further embarrassing both of them. He certainly didn’t want to consider anything remotely related to his niece and her love life. He didn’t even think of her as old enough to have one. In his mind, she was still a toddler running around.
“I’m not sure where to start,” Illwyn admitted, “I know there’s a lot that’s been going on you haven’t told anyone about. That much I gathered. What’s happening is normal, if that makes you feel better. Very rare, but normal for someone with your gifts.”
The words “normal” and “gifts” turned Mari’s thoughts sour. Her embarrassment was quickly fading as it was replaced with irritation. She was sure her uncle was trying to comfort her, but all he was doing was making it worse.
“Normal? How is what happened normal?” She pulled the side of her tee-shirt up exposing the angry red burns stretching up the side of her stomach, “How the fuck is this normal? If it’s a gift I want to send it back. I can’t do this, Uncle Illwyn. I can’t. I haven’t slept more than a couple hours in a week. I’m scared to let it go too far.”
Illwyn frowned at hearing his niece swearing. It was another reminder that the woman sitting before him was nowhere near the toddler he had imagined in his mind. He attempted to understand where she was coming from. He certainly knew he couldn’t understand exactly what she was talking about, but he had dealt with his power growing and being out of control. It was something that many of the Fae in their family had to deal with.
“You can’t give it back,” Illwyn countered patiently, “Let me explain some things before you keep trying to bite my head off, yes?” He leveled his niece with an authoritative look that he intended to remind her that, while he was tolerating her being angry and flippant, she still needed to calm down and listen to him.
Mari closed her eyes. She inhaled deeply, before exhaling and attempting to control her temper. She was frustrated, at so many things, but she knew that her uncle was right and none of it was truly his fault. It wasn’t fair for her to direct her anger at him, she reminded herself.
“Fine. Explain.”
“Right,” Illwyn replied before taking a steadying breath, “You have formed a bond that bridges empathic and psychic abilities. The dreams you’re having…they’re a bridge between you and someone else. Not just a figment of your subconscious. I can’t tell you why it happened, or how it happened with this individual…as it usually should only happen between two Fae, but if what I saw is correct, that is a dragon shifter, a fire dragon specifically. Which is why you keep ending up with those burns.”
Mari’s eyebrows knit together in frustration and disbelief. A fire dragon? Her mind raced as she tried to process the information. She had never met a dragon shifter to begin with, there were only two clans remaining, and the only one based in the US was clear on the opposite side of the country. She’d heard devastating stories about fire dragons specifically. They were renowned for having little to no control, to the point they would most often destroy themselves and everyone around them.
Illwyn fished a hand in his pocket retrieving an intricate silver bracelet, with several strands of braided silver intertwined in a vine pattern centered around an emerald. He extended his arm and offered her the bracelet.
“This will only stop the burns. It will mute this psychical side of your empathic powers, not really bind them like we would with a young Fae,” he explained as Mari slide the bracelet over her hand. It felt cool against her skin, though she didn’t feel any different wearing it than she had before.
“Will this stop the dreams? Break the connection?” She asked hopefully. She sincerely wanted nothing more than to be able to sleep, or use her powers without such intense dreams taking over. Her eyes searched Illwyn’s for some glimmer of reassurance but was met only with reluctance.
“I’m afraid not. That kind of connection doesn’t happen often. It’s called an animus connection…soul connection. We’ve never been able to explain why they happen, but they are powerful and aren’t something that can be broken. It’s like the two individuals share a life force, or a soul. I can’t find any record of it happening between a Fae and another creature. The connection is strengthened the closer in proximity the two individuals are. Based on what I could see from Rena, this man has been getting closer and closer to here, which is why the dreams are increasing in frequency and intensity.”
Mari’s mind was shattering trying to process the information that Illwyn was telling her. She pulled her knees up to her chest, hugging them tightly. The implications of what this meant was beyond frightening to her. She eyed her uncle warily and could sense that he was still keeping part of the story from her.
“I feel like you’re not telling me part of the picture,” she sighed in frustration, dreading what else her uncle could possible think was too much for her to hear.
“This man, if all of these things are related like I think they are, is incredibly dangerous,” Illwyn explained, “The man I brought with me earlier, Riley, was his friend. They fought and he brutally injured Riley, who is barely recovering from his injury. Just making the trip out here has taxed him more than I think he would ever admit. He’s come to help find his friend.”
“His friend fell under the control of someone who is incredibly powerful, and ultimately endangering everything we know. She’s the reason I am here. She has been collecting various creatures around the Eastern region, and now suddenly fled west to here, no less. The bear I had asked you to track down, we think is one of those, who have fallen in with her. I fear, what happened with Rena, was this woman taking advantage of the link between you and the fire dragon. I suspect she was able to use it to bridge the gap between all of you, and pull Rena’s power beyond being bound.”
“Can’t you just put Rena’s power back? I mean, binding can be done and undone. We do it all the time,” Mari asked in confusion. She wasn’t sure what this all meant for her sister, but she felt a flood of guilt over the fact that she had definitely been responsible for what happened to her sister.
“We can’t, dear,” Illwyn explained, “Power isn’t meant to be shifted away from a person like that. It’s an act against nature, and the costs of playing with power like that are deadly. I fear that’s what makes this situation with your connection so dangerous. The same thing was done to the fire dragon you’re linked with.”
Mar stared down at the circle pattern on her bedding. Rena was stuck in limbo. Mari was linked to a fire dragon who was also stuck in limbo with his power. Mari’s mind was searching for any solution she could see to the situation.
“Can’t we just get rid of this woman? The one doing all of this? Who is she, anyway?” Mari asked eagerly. She was searching for any kind of answer that would at least give her some sense of solace, some goal she could focus on to take her mind off it all.
“I honestly don’t know, dear,” Illwyn sighed, “The best we’ve come up with is trying to have you, Magni, Riley, Valentyn, and the missing Bear’s brother head out and try to see if we can find one of them. Either the missing dragon or bear. We just need to find someone who may be able to at least lead us to where the woman is.”
Mari frowned, still sensing that her uncle was hiding things from her. She couldn’t figure out why he was still being so secretive. She felt minutely better that there was at least some sort of plan that could be put into place. She was less than thrilled it meant having to travel anywhere with William, who looked at her like a piece of meat, and Riley, who probably thought she was a wanton hussy.
“When are we supposed to be leaving?” She asked with the weight of just how tired she was starting to settle around her, weighing her down.
“Tomorrow morning.”
“How is Rena doing with all this? Is she going to be ok?” Mari asked, realizing that had been her main concern before she so rudely interrupted their dinner. She loved her sister and felt immensely guilty that she had so easily forgotten in her interest in hearing what her uncle was telling her.
“She is very different right now,” Illwyn said cautiously, “It’s going to take her some time to adjust to how she’s feeling. I would recommend you get some sleep, and check on her in the morning since she’s resting. You need the sleep, and should be able to at least get a full night’s sleep without having to worry about any more burn marks.”
Illwyn rose from the bed and moved to the door. He felt terrible that all of this was weighing so heavily on this younger generation. He had no idea how he was supposed to explain to them that the woman, Kali–that they were dealing with–was corrupted as a direct result of the actions that he, his sister, and Mari’s father had taken years ago.
“Mari,” he said as he paused looking back at her, “Your human friend, Ben? Try not to take him for granted in all this. You need him more than you realize right now.”
Illwyn turned and exited, leaving Mari stunned in a state of confusion, guilt, and exhaustion. She had no idea what her uncle had meant by what he said about Ben, but she had a sinking feeling that nothing good could come from Ben being wrapped up in this. With a deep sigh, she reached over to the lamp by her beside and turned it off. She plugged her phone in, and laid back on the pillow feeling the weight of everything crushing her emotionally. Her fingers traced the intricate design of her bracelet as her mind drifted quickly off to sleep, despite her hesitation over whether the bracelet would or wouldn’t work.