Jason flopped on his bed. Why had it been that memory? As soon as Selene had mentioned the cookies, the day had come back to him, a day he’d felt truly loved. It was one of the last days they were all together. Weeks later, Silas would move back to college and, although there would be visits, they would never live under the same roof again.

His stomach flipped as he remembered his parents dancing in the kitchen. It was something they’d done often, a quirky thing he’d found embarrassing as a teenager and oddly out of character for his usually stoic father. Now he’d do anything to see his parents dancing.

Outside his room, he heard Selene digging through his cupboards, pots and pans banging together, cabinet doors opening and closing. He should get up and help her find whatever she was looking for, but he didn’t. He was too busy trying to forget the memory she’d recalled in him. What she didn’t understand was that his happiest memory was now his most brutal reminder of his parents’ murder.

How could he tell Selene that remembering the source of the light within him was what fueled the darkness? A spray of bullets stole that moment from him in the most brutal way possible, negating it and every happy moment that came before. It was a memory of how everything you loved turned to shit eventually. Worm fodder.

Suddenly exhausted, he threaded his fingers behind his head, closed his eyes, and forced himself to forget again as he drifted away.

* * *

Gingerbread. The scent was unmistakable and almost overwhelming to his hypersensitive wolf senses. Immediately, the memory came back to him, all its light and its resulting darkness filling him at once.

“Selene, what have you done?” He scowled. Bounding from the bed, he burst from his room, ready to give her a piece of his mind. But when he reached the kitchen, the sight of her thawed any ice that had formed around his heart.

She’d donned a dress, the first one he’d ever seen her wear, simple and conservative with a flowing skirt that reached below the knee. Her hair was down, loose curls draped over her shoulders and flowing to the center of her back. And her smile was bright enough to light up the room.

All he could think was that she was perfect, beautiful, and worthy like an angel dropped down from heaven. Selene pulled a tray of cookies from the oven and turned her violet eyes on him.

“Who’s ready for some cookies?” she said softly.

Jason’s throat constricted and a muscle in his jaw twitched. Eyes burning, he crossed to her, a confusing mix of emotions swirling in his head. He shook her by the shoulders.

“Oww. Jason, you’re hurting me.”

A growl emanated from his chest, his wolf lowering its head and baring its teeth. Her eyes widened.

This close with his hands wrapped around her upper arms, he was more than aware how his size dwarfed hers. He’d gained the weight back, thanks to her, and now he was using it against her.

Justifiably. She had yanked his chain one too many times.

“Why would you do this?” he said. “Why would you do this to me?”

“I… I thought you needed help remembering. I wanted to recreate the moment. Sometimes a smell can bring it back.” She squirmed within his too-tight grip.

“I remember, Selene. I remember everything about that day,” he said through his teeth. “But did it ever occur to you that that memory holds nothing but pain for me?”

Tears formed in her eyes. “You’re hurting me,” she whispered.

He shook her harder. “They’re dead. Every time I think of how perfect our family was, I remember what Alex took from me. He’s still out there somewhere, probably being nursed back to health by an evil dragon bitch, and everything that was right and good about my life is gone. Think about what this means. You are telling me that my core memory, the thing that brings light to my soul, is something I can never have again. How can you believe for a second that I can ever leave my vice behind when the darkness is the only thing holding me together? There’s no hope for anything else. Everything that was good about me is dead.”

Trembling, Selene twisted from Jason’s grip. A tear slipped from the corner of her eye, carving a path down the slope of her nose to her upper lip. “Everything good about you is not dead,” she said softly. “I wouldn’t be here if I thought the light in you had died.” She rubbed her shoulders, backing away. “Alex didn’t take everything from you. There are still people who believe in you. People who need you.”

“Like who?”

“Silas… and Laina.”

Jason rolled his eyes.

“The pack. All the people whose businesses you invest in.”

“Silas is more alpha than any pack needs, including ours. And you don’t need light in your soul to make a good investment.”

“Me.” Selene’s gaze lifted to his. “I need you.” Her voice was as brittle as a dried bone.

He licked his lips. “Yeah. You need me to get better so you can be promoted to priestess.” He snorted derisively.

“No. That’s not it.” Selene’s voice was laden with emotion as if she were on the verge of tears.

“Then why?”

“Because… because…” She shook her head.

He began to turn, to walk away. Her hand landed on his. Selene guided one hand around her waist and his other into her upturned grip. Jason didn’t fight her as she pulled him into her chest.

“Selene, what are you doing?”

Without answering, she began to sway. It took a moment for him to take the lead, for her movement to stop battling his stillness, but soon their bodies moved as one. He rocked back and forth, turning her as they crossed the floor, and never breaking eye contact. He tried not to think about the fact she was an acolyte and his spiritual advisor or that everything that was happening fell well within the bounds of “inappropriate.” He was greedy and the tiny slice of happiness Selene was offering was not something he was willing to turn away.

He held her closer, his face a breath away from hers, and then, without warning, spun her away from his chest, across the kitchen, and back into his arms, dipping her in front of the stove. She giggled, her laugh ringing through him like a bell and lifting two tons of weight from his heart.

“You’re stunning,” he whispered in her ear as if it were a secret. “Do you know you could have any man you ever wanted with a wink of your eye?”

“Don’t be silly,” she said breathlessly. “I’ve never been beautiful.”

“Oh, sweet girl, you’re wrong about that, and if you were mine you’d never forget it.”

She met his eyes, her lip tucking between her teeth in a gesture that made her look younger than she was. He stood her on her own two feet, realizing his wolf’s interest in her had grown to unsafe levels for both of them. As much as he wanted her, as much as he longed to have her goodness in his life permanently, he needed to accept that she was here in a professional capacity only. She might remain friendly with him when all was said and done, but she’d never be his. Not really.

But then why wasn’t she moving away from his open arms?

* * *

A chill came over Selene’s body as Jason set her on her feet and opened his arms, the absence of his touch like the loss of heat after the setting sun. His green eyes darkened, a storm gathering in his thoughts, the irises tinged with amber. In that moment, she was not an acolyte or a spiritual therapist, she was just a woman whose entire being wanted to be back in those arms, wanted to feel precious again, wanted a taste of something she’d never had before, never would have again.

She stepped into his space and rose up on her tiptoes, her arms snaking around his neck. His breath quickened with his pulse, his hands spreading wider as if he were afraid to touch her, and his face, oh goddess, his face was a mask of torment. Ignoring the alarms going off in her head, she planted a kiss on his lips. She’d never kissed a man like this. Sure she’d had a mouth forced upon hers. She’d been kissed. But she’d never done the kissing. And certainly a kiss had never felt like this one. Soft, warm, gentle, searching. Her mind blanked, wrapped up in all the emotions and raw feelings that came with her wanton exploration.

But the kiss was one sided, his body stiff, his lips accepting but tentative. Until, quite suddenly, the wall she’d been pressing against, the invisible thing holding him back, shattered. His arms wrapped around her ribs and swept her away, the storm she’d seen gathering in his eyes swirling around her. The full force of his masculinity beat against her lips, blew across her skin, and doused her body in a deluge of heat. His hands were in her hair, on her waist.

And he was inside her mouth, stroking her tongue with his own in a way that set her on fire. His body pressed against hers, ushering her toward the sofa. When she bumped into its rounded back, he lifted her, hoisting her dress so he could slide between her knees.

Was this really happening? His body held a coiled tension she instinctively knew she could release. If she didn’t know better, she’d say it was magic, this force driving them toward each other. She wrapped her arms tighter around his neck, drawing him closer until she could feel the hard length of him pressed against her.

Jason pulled back, panting and groaning as if he were in pain. “No. No, we can’t.”

Selene shook her head. “This is right. It’s all right.” Something in the back of her mind knew she was wrong, but she didn’t want to think about it. Not now. Not yet. She wanted to stay in the storm, feel the rain drench her face, get swept away by the wind and the lightning without a thought to the consequences.

“You’d regret it. It would mean the end of your acolyte status. And as much as I want you, and oh, by the goddess I want you, I can’t do that to you. I can’t take your virtue when I know you’d never do this if I hadn’t been such a shit to you and drawn you into my web.”

“Drew me in? I wasn’t drawn in. I have feelings for you—”

“You’re sweet and naive. You don’t see it. I’m a predator. I have a power over women. It’s not your fault. Without even realizing it, I seduced you. You’d never do this if I hadn’t. You’d never risk your future.” He backed away, his hands coming to rest on his knees, the physical hardship of holding back the desires of his wolf evident on his face.

Selene’s eyes widened and she looked out the glass doors to the balcony, to the moon that hung in the night sky. “I’m so sorry, Jason. I’m a fool.”

“It’s not you.”

“No. The shift is tomorrow night. I’ve tempted you at your most vulnerable.”

He took a step back, still hunched over, and clutched his middle.

“Are you in pain?”

“Go into your room and lock the door,” he said.

“What? Jason, no. Let’s talk about this.”

He raised his eyes to hers and all she saw was the animal, the intense need turning his eyes from green to the amber of his wolf’s. She hopped down from the back of the couch.

“Go,” he said, a deep growl emanating from his chest.

She did, running into her room and locking the door. She heard him pacing on the other side for some time, the slam of what she assumed was the cookie sheet against the counter, the whine of the front door opening, and his groans as Silas’s command kept him from leaving.

Eventually, after what seemed like hours of painful pacing, his bedroom door slammed and she heard his shower turn on.

Selene fell back onto her bed, wondering at the ache in her body that accompanied her thoughts of Jason. She ran her fingers down her neck, between her breasts, over the cotton bodice of her dress, and up along her inner thigh. She stopped at the lace edge of her briefs. Was a vice catching? Because right now, all Selene could think of, although she knew it was wrong and self-destructive, was how she didn’t regret kissing Jason.

If anything, she regretted stopping.