The next morning was a rude awakening. If this is what her life would be like, it sucked. Evil Billy kicked dirt directly in her face to wake her up as the sun rose. Unfortunately for Sabine, she had slept with her mouth open from exhaustion, thus landing her a clump of dirt right on her tongue. Sitting up quickly, rubbing her eyes, gagging and coughing, she almost lost her temper at the obnoxious treatment from the hulking ogre. Evil Billy was laughing at her sputtering and then kicked her boots.

“Get to moving, if you ain’t dead yet,” he announced lightly. “We are mounting up. Jack, thought you were gonna take care of the boy?”

“I am,” he countered. “I was letting him get some sleep so he can pull his weight. Remember we thought he was ill? I think he needs a bit to get used to life as a volunteer.”

“You’re too damned soft on him. Get up, kid,” Billy ordered again, swinging his boot out to kick her foot again. This time, Sabine was ready. She had wiped her face and spat out the dirt, watching the men nearby. She swung her legs away from Billy’s boot, almost causing him to lose his balance, eliciting a grin from Jack off in the distance as he watched the display.

Sabine hopped to her feet and glared at the big oaf, her hands clenched to the side. She had just gotten here and didn’t feel she deserved to be treated as such! Not to be ungrateful, she would bite her tongue until absolutely necessary.

The last thing she wanted to do was wear out her welcome on the first day. Jack didn’t know her and she didn’t really know him. If the roles were reversed and someone challenged a person she had known for a while, she’d be tempted to side with them. That was the last thing she wanted! If push came to shove, she wanted someone, anyone, on her side! If she was supposed to actually be “matched” with Jack as Eve had told her, she didn’t want to drive a wedge or create disharmony between them so early on. She wanted a friend to have her back. Her father always supported her mother and she wanted the same thing for herself.

Billy began kicking dirt onto the small fire they had built. Sabine saw the tin plates and bones on the makeshift spit. Figures! They let her sleep and ate already. Her shoulders dropped as she realized that not one of them had chosen to wake her in time for a meal. Instead, she would go hungry for a while longer.

“Chip,” Sam called out. “If you want to wash up before we head out there is a creek over yonder. Just hurry and we’ll wait.” Looking away, she felt tears welling up at the first nice or polite thing said to her. Unfortunately, it was from the redheaded man she had passed over due to his lack of teeth. Why couldn’t it have come from Jack?

“Thanks,” she said quietly and walked off towards the creek alone. “He said hurry!” she heard Billy call out behind her rudely. Just ignore him, she thought, like they ignored me.

She walked downstream a bit in order to have a bit of privacy. She wanted to wash up and use the restroom. She also hoped for a bit of privacy in case she wanted to have a small pity party and give in to the tears that were now rolling down her cheeks silently. She wasn’t sure if she even wanted to stay with the group at this point! Maybe if they left her, Eve would just swoop right down and remove her from this setting, too. After all, she had been yanked from her life just as it had fallen into place. Perhaps, she could find another reason to have it all start over again.

Kneeling by the creek, she washed her face and stared at the water. Her mind was racing at any other places and locales she would rather be at right now, complete with issues each one would incur. Here was obviously a rough lifestyle. They had been on horses for hours yesterday to the point that she didn’t even realize they had built a fire as she slept. She could have been attacked, tied up or killed without knowing. At this point, she kinda didn’t care. Could it get any worse? What would life be like if it was better? Could it get better?

“Eve?” she called softly, hoping for an answer and hearing none. Staring at her reflection, she saw that she had dirt in her hair as well due to her rude awakening. She’d love to climb into the creek and float in the cool water, but she knew there wasn’t enough time for that. Instead, she rolled up her sleeves and proceeded to brace herself so she didn’t go headfirst into the water. Carefully, she dunked her head and shook it around in an effort to wash it. With no soap or comb, she realized that she might have made things worse. The water certainly felt better and made her feel like a person again. Using her fingers, she tried to comb down the brown mass that was now standing on end like a troll doll. A wild looking person, she thought, amused.

“Chip, you ready?” She heard Jack’s deep voice behind her and groaned aloud at her reflection. Of course, he would catch me with my hair standing on end, wouldn’t he? Noooooo, couldn’t wait until I was somewhat presentable – could you? Sighing, she hurriedly finished trying to smooth down the stray locks.

“Yes, I’m ready. Sorry I took so long,” Sabine said politely, looking over her shoulder at him. She felt her stomach clench at his rugged good looks. Jack had obviously either had a bath in the creek or had washed his hair as well. He stood nearby and his brown hair had curled from the water. He seemed almost larger than life as he watched her. Jack had a presence that called to her. It was obvious as she felt her body respond. She was just depressed that it was all so one-sided.

He didn’t seem interested in the slightest and looked vaguely bothered at times. Times like now! While she thought he looked devastatingly handsome standing there, he looked at her like she had sprouted horns on her forehead. Honestly, he looked truly baffled and appalled the longer he looked at her. It was insulting to see such an open reaction quickly get hidden away. Looking in the water at her reflection one more time for good measure, she sighed and slapped the dusty hat on her head in frustration.

Standing, she dusted off her knees and ran to catch up with him as he walked off towards the horses. Jack mounted his horse easily and held out his hand politely to help Sabine up. Grasping his hand, she pulled herself upwards and took her seat behind him. She couldn’t help the sigh that slipped from her as she wrapped her hands around his waist. He must have heard her because he jumped, yanked her hands right off his stomach where they lay and leaped down from the horse.

“You go ahead and ride,” he said abruptly, looking away and taking the reins of the horse. “I’ll walk for a while.” Evil Billy and Sam stared at the two of them oddly at the scene that they were making. If Jack walked, they would be moving at a slower pace, increasing their travel time. Sabine blushed, embarrassed and humiliated at the treatment, and silently nodded. She moved herself up onto the saddle from the horse blanket she had sat upon yesterday during their ride. Catching him watching her, she saw him quickly look away as he pulled his hat down low on his face.

Sabine rode silently for quite a while. The landscape was gorgeous in its own wild way. Occasionally, she would see something off in the distance and remark on it, but that quickly went by the wayside as well. When she saw a group of jackrabbits, she exclaimed, “Look at the sweet bunnies!” as she heard several loud pops making her jump in response. Turning, she saw Sam and Billy both had their revolvers drawn, grinning at their handiwork. Glancing back, she saw that two of the rabbits had been shot. Sabine looked at Jack horrified, only to find that he was staring back at her with almost the same expression. Looking away quickly, she tried to mask the hurt she was feeling and how out of place she felt.

This was definitely a different world, she thought as she watched Sam dismount. He gathered up the two limp rabbits and strung them up on the neck of his saddle. Sam called Jack over and spoke silently with him for a moment. Sabine knew it was about her as Jack looked over towards her and then mounted the horse. Sam walked over and took up the reins that hung from her horse.

“I’m going to walk for a bit to stretch my legs,” he said easily. “Hope you don’t mind. We’ll rotate out when we stop again.” Billy was then quick to yell that he wasn’t giving up his horse for some mealy mouth, spoiled kid. Sabine would have rolled her eyes if she didn’t feel lower than dirt at the moment. She felt like she was bothering the trio. Two out of the three didn’t seem to mind her being there so much, but it wasn’t exactly welcoming either. Nodding, she remained in the saddle as they began walking the horses again.

* * *

When they finally stopped for the night, Sabine slid boneless to the ground next to the horse much to Billy’s amusement. She received empathetic looks from Sam and Jack as she tried to stand but her legs would not cooperate. The muscles in her thighs burned something fierce and it was like her body was just not operating properly.

Sabine got to her hands and knees, struggling to pull herself upwards and keep from getting stepped on by the horse when she saw a hand appear. Jack stood next to her, offering to help. “I’m good. Just give me a minute,” she grumbled feeling humiliated as she heard Billy chuckling.

“Chip, c’mon,” Jack said abruptly, grasping her under the arm and lifting her bodily. She shivered as his hand came precariously close to her breast that was hidden by the vest. As she stood on wobbly legs, she realized she barely came to his shoulders.

“Walk it off and stretch your legs. Gather some twigs for a fire,” he said gruffly and released her arm. “You’ll toughen up.” Sabine stood there for several minutes until she felt like she was getting control of her limbs again. She walked some distance, gathering a stray stick here or there. She found one log but, as she went to move it, a swarm of ants began pouring out of the nest she had disturbed. She dropped the small log immediately and backed away.

She returned to the site to find that they had removed the saddles and allowed the horses to graze. Billy tossed a limp rabbit towards her with orders to clean it, as he removed the fur from the other rabbit in one horrific pull. That terrible ripping sound echoed in her head as she backed away from him, heaving. She ran for the nearest place to hide.

A small mesquite tree served as a wall from the disgusting sights and sounds of the rabbits being cleaned for cooking. She gave in to the nausea, feeling lightheaded and gagging as her empty stomach contracted painfully. Slightly dizzy, she sat in the dirt. She was obviously in the wrong place, wrong time. She wasn’t cut out for this life and it was becoming painfully obvious the longer she was here.

Sabine sat under the tree for quite a while, alone. Weak, hungry, nauseated and in pain seemed to be her world right now. Oh, and rejected! Can’t forget that! Rejected by the person she was supposed to bond with, he seemed to be repulsed by her very being. Every time she saw a spark flare, it was quelled almost as quickly. She heard steps coming towards her and didn’t move. Her head hung low as she sat cross-legged in the dirt. If she had to run away right now, she was one hundred percent certain she couldn’t. She’d drop either from a muscle cramp or lack of nourishment.

“You okay, Chip?” she heard Jack ask from a distance and nodded slightly.

“Here,” Jack said politely and shoved a tin of beans towards her. “Billy told me about the rabbit. You sure you want to be a Volunteer? It’s a tough life sometimes. If you’ll forgive me for saying it, you seem…” he hesitated, as if trying to think of the word. He took a seat next to her and didn’t finish the statement. Instead, he sat nearby and stared off in the distance.

“Thanks for the beans, but I’m not sure I can eat,” she whispered, staring at the plate.

“You are gonna have to eat something, unless you’d prefer rabbit?” he asked bluntly. “I won’t have you dying on me. I’ve never left someone and won’t start now. Eat up, Chip – even if you don’t feel like it.”

Nodding, she grasped the spoon and took a bite. The smoky taste of the rich beans made her stomach clench in anticipation. She was starving and so relieved it wasn’t rabbit he brought. He handed her a square biscuit of some sort that seemed extremely stale and salty. While it struck her as odd, she pretended it was a thick saltine cracker. She cleaned the tin, scraping every bit of sauce from the beans up as much as possible.

“Better?” he asked, still looking away.

“Much. Thank you,” she said politely, staring at his profile.

“Good. When you are ready, come join us around the fire,” he invited politely, standing. “I’ll get the dishes tonight. You rest, kiddo.” Sabine handed Jack the tin, nodding and watching him as he looked away from her.

She sat in place for some time, watching the sunset. She heard the men’s voices carry towards her as they talked. This seemed almost peaceful as she listened to their stories. They were carrying on, laughing and telling ribald jokes that had her laughing from where she sat. She stood, and walked over to the fire to join them. She sat between Sam and Jack, simply to keep herself far from Billy. There was something simply wrong with the man that bothered her to no end. He was the type of person that would get a kick out of simply being cruel to people and animals for fun.

Jack handed her a canteen without looking her direction. He simply extended his arm and stared at the fire. As she took it, she watched him roll a cigarette. It was strange because he hadn’t smelled of smoke like people back home had. As he lit it, she took a deep breath as the earthy, sweet tobacco smell came alive, mixing with the scents of the fire pit and the long-gone rabbit. Lifting the canteen, she heard Billy talking about the last woman he was with.

“Didn’t ask her name, cause hell, I didn’t need it for what she did for me!” he exclaimed lewdly. “Drink up, Chip. We’ll make a man of you yet!”

Sabine took a small sip and shivered, making her the butt of Billy’s jokes again. It was not unpalatable, but simply stronger than anything she had ever had before! Taking another deep drink, she shivered again at the pungent aftertaste and handed the canteen back to Jack. It was strange that he kept avoiding meeting her eyes. He was polite, almost overly so. She sat with them for quite a while, simply hoping that maybe she would learn more about them as a group or just learn more about Jack. Unfortunately, he was silent and didn’t talk much. Occasionally, he would smile or laugh at something Sam said, but the second he caught her staring at him, he would look away, uncomfortable.

“I think I will turn in, if you all don’t mind?” she murmured, feeling the effects of the alcohol. The canteen was handed back to her one more time, this time by Sam. “Go ahead, you’ll sleep heavy and feel better tomorrow,” he told her. “Jack told me you had been sick.”

Looking quickly at Jack, she saw him frown and throw a rock into the fire. They had been talking about her? Taking the canteen, she took another sip and slowly stood.

“Thank you again, for everything. I will be better tomorrow.” Sabine unrolled a horse blanket they had provided and lay down not far from them. The thing she wanted to be was left alone in the darkness if the fire died in the night. It felt so good to be lying down, as the tangy alcohol warmed her insides. She felt so relaxed and vaguely felt like she was beginning to fit in. “Goodnight.”

“G’ night, Chip,” she heard from Billy and Sam. Jack was silent as she caught him staring at her from across the fire. His expressive green eyes confused and torn. Sabine gave a shy smile that died when he turned away quickly. She rolled over to stare at the stars. She felt hurt at the abrupt dismissal and longed for home.