Chapter 7
Brad stared at the sleeping baby.
His sleeping baby.
He still couldn’t quite believe it.
He’d never even considered being a parent. In fact, he’d always been pretty careful not to be. Except for that time with Lyrian.
He hadn’t exactly come out here thinking he was going to meet anyone. He’d been visiting his uncle for goodness sake. Things had been getting hot and heavy with Lyrian, and he’d asked if she had protection.
He was sure she’d said she’d take care of it.
He’d assumed that meant she had protection. He hadn’t considered her taking care of a baby.
Probably he should have stopped and made sure, but he hadn’t wanted to stop. God had he not wanted to stop.
And maybe it wouldn’t have made any difference if he had anyway. Maybe she had used protection. He knew, objectively, that sometimes things failed. He’d seen the statistics enough times.
He just hadn’t expected it to ever happen to him.
This was going to have a far-reaching impact on his life. Lyrian didn’t want to go to America, and he had a job there he couldn’t leave. This was going to be a mess. He knew that.
But the knowledge was dim and distant.
It wasn’t half as real as standing here in this room, the sunlight from the window illuminating the floating dust motes, a magpie warbling somewhere outside, and the sleeping baby shoving a tiny fist into her mouth and sucking on it noisily.
His heart overflowed with love in a way it never had before.
He knew, in that moment, that he’d do anything for the tiny human in front of him.
Even give up everything he’d thought was important.
Because none of that mattered anymore.
It was amazing really, he’d never seen this baby before. Never even dreamed she existed until a few moments ago. Yet, he loved her with his entire being.
The sucking grew louder. Anarian wriggled in the bed, and then her eyes flicked open, then closed, then opened again.
She stared at him, her sky blue eyes reminding him of her mothers.
Seemed Anarian took after her. He couldn’t see any hint of him in her face at all. Not that he had a problem with that. She was perfect just the way she was.
Her eyes widened a little, and then she let out a wail.
Food. She probably wanted food.
Brad turned around to head to the kitchen to heat up the bottle in hot water, as Lyrian had instructed him. Then he realised.
He shouldn’t leave the baby. She wasn’t in a crib, she was on a mattress on the floor. Who knew what could happen. He should take her with him.
He moved over next to the bed, and stared down at her, half afraid to touch her.
Sure, he’d held a baby before. He’d had to examine some during his residency. He’d even performed heart surgery on one.
But this was different.
This wasn’t someone else’s baby whose life he was saving.
This was his baby.
None of his friends or family had started families of their own yet. The closest any of them had come had been his twin brother helping to deliver a baby on a plane a few months back. Even then, Nate had taken pictures, not held the baby.
Brad gave a wry laugh. None of them ever would have expected he’d be the first.
He bent down, and picked Anarian up as gently as he could. She wriggled, her little body stiff and her face screwed up as she proclaimed her dislike of this situation to anyone who would listen.
Unfortunately, the only person who could hear her right now was Brad.
He cradled her in his arms. Amazing that such a tiny thing could make such a noise.
He headed out to the kitchen, then wondered what he was going to do with the baby while he heated up the milk. He transferred her awkwardly to one arm, and did his best to scoop the bottle into some warm water with one hand.
It was harder than he expected. Anarian cried the entire time.
Babies cried. He knew that. But when he’d been examining them, he’d been able to keep his distance. Of course they’d been crying in a strange, unfamiliar situation. But they’d stopped when he’d handed them back to their parents.
Now he was the parent, and Anarian wasn’t stopping.
It was hard not to take that one personally.
Brad bounced Anarian up and down, as he’d seen mothers doing. “Hey there, it’s okay. Your milk will be ready in just a minute.”
Anarian, of course, had no idea what he was telling her, and continued to cry.
As Brad jiggled and prayed for the milk to warm up faster, it occurred to him that there might be another reason for her tears. She probably needed a clean diaper as well.
He frowned. Come to think of it, he hadn’t seen any diapers anywhere. He backtracked to the bedroom, but still couldn’t see any. Only a pile of folded facecloths.
On second examination, they closely resembled the diaper Anarian was wearing.
Looks like Lyrian favoured cloth diapers. Why wasn’t he surprised? Brad took a deep breath. He could do this.
He laid the screaming baby down, and undid the safety pin.
The diaper was, indeed, very wet. No wonder Anarian was crying. Brad put it to one side, not sure where Lyrian kept them, and reached for another. Trouble was, he wasn’t sure how he was supposed to fold it.
He reached for his phone. Luckily it was still connected to his uncle’s wifi. The internet would have the answer.
Sure enough, it took him only seconds to find a video on how to fold a diaper. As a bonus, as soon as the video started, Anarian stopped crying and stared at it, entranced.
Brad managed to fold the diaper and get it successfully pinned on her.
When he was finally done, the milk was cold, and he needed to heat it up again. He played a few kitten videos to Anarian while they waited, which mitigated the crying a little. Even so, by the time the bottle was warm enough, Brad’s nerves were shot.
It wasn’t like he hadn’t dealt with stressful situations. He was a cardiac surgeon for goodness sake. In fact, he was known for his calm head in an emergency.
He’d never felt this stressed before.
He fumbled with the bottle, trying to slide the teat into Anarian’s screaming mouth.
It was as though he’d hit the mute button. Her little rosebud mouth opened and practically sucked in the teat, then her face was suddenly completely peaceful as she sucked the milk down furiously.
Brad eased himself into one of the big lounge chairs and stared at her, exhausted.
She really was beautiful. When she was sleeping anyway. Her blue eyes reminded him so clearly of Lyrian, every time he saw them. They were the same shade, more blue than any he’d ever seen before.
Now that she was out in the light, the blue tint to her hair was even more unmistakable. It wasn’t a trick of the light, her hair really was blue. He could imagine that it was only going to become more obvious as she grew more of it.
He frowned. It was the most unusual thing he’d ever seen. He’d never seen a baby with coloured hair before.
Had Lyrian dyed it?
Surely she wouldn’t do that to a baby. He could just imagine the screaming, and he knew that wasn’t any fun at all.
So how did it get blue?
He stroked it gently with his finger, marvelling at its baby softness.
The bottle gurgled, and the last of the milk drained into Anarian’s mouth.
Brad hoped she’d had enough. It was all he could do not to wince as she sucked harder, then stopped. He gently pulled the bottle out of her mouth, expecting another scream.
But she didn’t. Instead, she stared up at him, her little face scrunched up in concentration, her eyes staring into his.
Then she smiled.
The expression lit up her face, and his heart.
“Hey,” he said softly.
He wasn’t sure if the baby could understand him, but it felt right. “Your mommy is out for a little while, and she left me in charge. I don’t know a lot about babies, so you’re going to have to tell me if I’m getting something wrong. I think you’ll be more than happy to do that.”
Anarian listened intently, her little eyes focused on his face.
So Brad kept talking. “I’m hoping you and I can get to know each other a little better.” He hesitated for a few minutes, then he added, “I’m your daddy, you see. I’m not sure if mom mentioned me, but… well, I only just found out about you. Otherwise I would have been here sooner.”
If he’d had any clue, he would have dropped everything to come. Why had no one told him?
Lyrian seemed to have a lot of secrets. Her brothers, her elusive looks that she’d somehow passed onto her baby, and who knew what else.
Brad was determined to unlock them, no matter how long it took.
He suspected he was going to need more than a week.