Chapter 24

Anna

I buried my face in Austin’s pillow, but not even his scent could bring me peace. I hadn’t stepped foot back in my room since it was completely destroyed. I didn’t want to see the bloodstains on the floor or the marks from the fire on the walls. I didn’t even want to smell the smoke on any of my belongings. Austin had promised that Team Seven was coming later this week to put everything back to normal. But plaster and paint couldn’t fix the gnawing emptiness and pain that filled my heart. I couldn’t get past the guilt of Talen’s death or of letting Gemma in to terrorize my pack.

I had one job. One. Protect the pack from magic.

I could still feel the echo of Talen’s memories in my mind, and I was suspicious of some of the new knowledge that was floating through my brain. Talen had given me more than I had realized, but a part of me was angry that he hadn’t fought harder to stay with us. We had a funeral service for him yesterday. As much as he had antagonized the guys while he was alive, no one could deny that he had given his life for the pack. For me.

His service had been held on the beach, his body burned on a funeral pyre. We had no way to get in touch with Froston or anyone else from the fae world, but with everything that I had seen in Talen’s memories, they wouldn’t have cared anyway. I think I had surprised Austin with my bitterness when I told him that, but he had just gently taken my hand and assured me that Talen would be surrounded by people who respected him for his sacrifice. I wasn’t sure if it was military or wolf culture, but almost every member of the pack had sought me out to promise that Talen had earned a spot in Valhalla.

Austin, Cody, Caleb, and even James had been gently caring for me since that night. I had slept the first day after everything had happened, probably because my body had been physically and mentally exhausted. But after that, I had drifted between troubled sleep and blankly staring at the wall, replaying everything in my mind and cursing myself for not being able to stop what happened.

The guys had been trying to coax me into eating, but everything tasted like ashes and stuck in my throat. They tried to hold me at night, but not even the warmth of their closeness was enough to heal my broken heart. I had heard Cody and James shouting at the twins down the hall a couple of times, but Mason and Jason had avoided me for three days now. I deserved it.

The other guys had taken turns watching over me. Right now I had Austin on one side of the bed and Cody on the other. Intellectually, I knew that I was being weak by hiding in bed and not facing the consequences of my actions. But I just couldn’t. I was numb to everything but my own self-loathing and regrets.

Tears soaked my pillow, and I tried to remain soundless as I cried. I wasn’t successful, because Cody took me in his arms to rub my back. “You’re breaking my heart, Anna,” he murmured as he held me. “I just want to make you okay again.”

I didn’t answer, because this wasn’t the first time that he had held me as I wept, and I doubted it would be the last. I drifted off to sleep as he stroked my hair and his murmurs faded into silence as the darkness swallowed me up.