Amalia…

I legit had a headache for two fucking days after cracking my skull on the damn counter. Didn’t stop me from having sex with him on the couch that night, but I’d begged off going anywhere. I still felt as fragile as blown glass and needed time to cool properly after my raging shit storm of a crying jag.

God, I hated that shit.

Now we were at his clubhouse on a Friday night and the boys had all come back to get the little women and children out of what they called the media room. Gag me with a spoon, but being on the domesticated end of the spectrum was so not my thing.

Kyle came in behind Trigger, caught one look at the sour look on my face and started laughing.

“Everything all right?” Shelly asked, catching the same look. Man, my mouth wasn’t the problem. It was totally my face that needed some sort of deliverance.

I told the truth, couldn’t help myself. “The mommy shtick is so not my scene.”

She smiled and nodded, one of the kids was teething, and I knew it wasn’t their fault but the damn crying set my nerves on edge and made me antsy.

“It’s okay, I totally get it,” she said. “I always wanted my own kids but other people’s kids? Not yours!” she shot a look at Red who was looking over amused, Melody echoing the look beside her. “Like stranger’s kids. Like to drive me up the wall!”

“Yeah, it’s no offense,” I said wincing as another one of the toddlers started in after getting beaned in the head with a block.

“Come on,” Kyle said laughing, holding out a hand. I took it and he hauled me off the end of the couch. “We’re out!” he called.

“Man, now I feel like I’m being shitty!” I groused as he pulled me out the door.

“No, trust me, they aren’t in the cult of mommy, they get it. They signed up for it, you not so much.”

“Amen,” I said. “Not disappointed are you?”

He shook his head, “No. I can live without the baby phase.”

I laughed, “Okay, all right.”

I knew it was a conversation we had before, but people changed their minds, you know? I had to check and see every once in a while. I knew I took bullheaded to a new level, but not everyone made a decision and stuck to it like I did. Kyle was in this, too and his thoughts, his feelings on any given subject, meant the world.

We went out the back and up to the fire pit area. I sank onto one of the benches and Kyle dropped onto it next to me, his arm automatically lying across the back of the seat and curving around my shoulders.

“Your kid is crying,” Revelator called out from behind us towards Ghost who was crouched and trying to get the fire lit.

“Yeah, so’s yers,” Ghost said absently.

“Go on, the both of you. I got this,” I said getting up and Rush called out, “Sit down all o’ you! Before you go an’ fuck up my fire pit!”

I snorted but sat back down gratefully, putting myself closer, tucking myself tight into Kyle’s side.

Bailey, Rush’s girlfriend and apparently Dray’s cousin on his mama's side, had two beers each in her hands. She stopped in front of Kyle and held two of them out to us with an arched brow.

“Thanks,” Kyle said and took them from her.

“Just doin’ what you asked,” she said with a wink.

“And he’s expressing his appreciation, Bailes!” Dray called out. Bailey and I exchanged a look and rolled our eyes in unison.

“Jesus, I heard that all the way from over here,” Everett called as she and Dray took a seat across and one swing to the left of us. Cue some good-natured laughter.

I liked this. I felt at home – like I might actually fit here. Even more so when Kyle’s arm tightened around me, dragging my temple to his lips where he pressed them for a kiss that took two seconds longer than was polite. Of course, that’s because I knew he was breathing me in. He liked the smell of my shampoo, or so he said, which I found funny because I hadn’t used the same stuff more than twice since we’d landed here. I kept raiding his stock of stolen hotel shampoos and conditioners and it was killing my color.

Even though there were other men and women of his club around, I felt comfortable. Like we might as well be out here alone, so I asked the question that’d been burning the shit out of me for a couple of days, now.

“Where were you going to take me the other night before I so gracefully tried to give myself permanent brain damage?”

He snorted and laughed and hugged me a little closer, but before he could answer, Trigger did it for him.

“Was supposed to bring you by the shop.”

I frowned and echoed the word questioningly, “Shop?”

“Yeah,” Disney said, showing up to the fire with his arm around his boyfriend. “Our shop.”

“As in tattoo?” I asked.

“Asking about if she wants the job?” Revelator asked, coming up bouncing his son. The boy had finally stopped with the crying and was sucking his thumb, his tear-stained face dull and sightlessly staring from where it lay on his dad’s shoulder. Lost in his own dreamy little imagination, the kid was tuckered out and two seconds from racking out completely, and I felt a pang of almost, almost, wanting one of my own.

I had no doubt that I would be completely cured of the notion as soon as he started screaming again. I just did not do screaming child well at all. They sent my damn blood pressure through the roof and made me want to punt a puppy or something.

Yeah, my ‘mommy’ was definitely broken.

“What job?” I asked, suspicious.

“We get a lot of transient talent to fill spots for a few weeks here and a few weeks there, but we have a station we’d like to permanently fill,” Trigger said, looking across the licking flames at me.

“Seriously? Just like that, you want to give me a job?”

Revelator laughed, “No, not just like that.”

“You forget we have your portfolio?” Disney asked, grinning.

Yeah, I actually had… Fuck.

Out loud I said, “No, but I didn’t expect you all to go snooping, thought that wasn’t y’all’s style.”

“Oh! Listen to her! Losing that city girl accent already,” Rush grinned.

“I was a Kentucky girl long before I was a city anything,” I reminded him. Kyle nuzzled the side of my neck and I got the hint. Cool it down, he didn’t mean anything by it.

“Couldn’t help myself,” Disney declared. “Good art begs to be looked at.”

“Spot’s open, but it’s a limited time offer,” Revelator said but he wasn’t being a dick about it. He stared into the fire, rocking his body back and forth, shifting from foot to foot and bouncing on his knees a little and the tyke was almost out.

“How limited?” I asked.

“As in not on the table for long,” Rev said.

I rolled my eyes, “Do I have to decide right this second, or can I see the shop first?”

“I’d hope you’d want to see the shop first,” Trigger said grinning.

“When?” I asked coolly. I didn’t want to seem over-eager.

“We’re open tomorrow,” Disney declared.

I nodded slowly, thinking it over. I mean, did I really want to put all my eggs in one basket? I settled against Kyle and sheltered close to his body while a tempest of thoughts raged in my head.

Living with him, being a part of his life was becoming as natural as breathing. Granted, I was restless as fuck and wanted to go back to work, but did I want to work for his club brothers? Was that a good move? I mean, I was sure there were other shops in the area that could use some talent. I mean, if I had to leave, working for these guys would make it that much harder to bolt at a –

I startled so hard at my revelation I physically moved and Kyle’s attention snapped to me.

“You okay?” he asked slowly and gave me some serious side-eye when I answered too quickly.

“Yeah, fine. Random cold shiver.”

“It’s in the 70’s out here and we’re in front of a fire,” he said flatly. I hung my head, and he took a pull from his beer. “Come on, let’s go somewhere we can talk.”

Well, I wasn’t getting out of this one, but granted I wasn’t trying very hard to either. He led me away from the fire and away from his brothers over to a copse of trees near the fence line. They made a triangular clearing and there were three hammocks set up over here. The bough of one of the trees hung low enough to screen us from view of the fire and everyone else, giving us the illusion of privacy. I took a drink of my own beer and let the sudsy, hoppy goodness go down smooth.

“Spill,” he ordered teasingly and sat down in one of the hammocks, boots planted firmly on the ground so he could swing back and forth a little. I joined him, and we sat under the dim, deepening twilight, rocking back and forth, sipping our beers.

“I just had a rude thought back there is all,” I told him, suddenly worried that if I told him, it would hurt his feelings.

“Yeah, about what?”

“I was just letting my train of thought steam on, wondering about working for your friends…”

He interrupted me gently, “Mali, they’re your friends, too.”

“I know,” I said blushing faintly. God, what kind of an asshole was I? The kind that doesn’t let anyone into your circle and guards it like Fort Knox, my sarcastic self answered.

I let out a frustrated exhale and pursed my lips, Kyle just patiently waited me out. I finally rushed it out, like ripping a Band-Aid off, “I weighed whether or not it was a good option to go there in case I had to make a quick exit again.”

He nodded slowly, “I see, and what did you come up with?”

I looked up at him like he’d grown a second head, and when he didn’t immediately laugh like he used to, I did what I used to do and crossed my eyes to add to the effect. I got the sought-after laugh, took a deep breath and said, “To be honest, my train of thought derailed right then.”

“And now that it’s back on track?”

“I’m pretty sure there were no survivors, dude.” He laughed again and fell silent, taking a drink from his beer and waiting me out again. To be fair, I used the silence to do what he was silently asking me to do… think about it. I mean, really think about it.

I was so tired of running and I didn’t have to anymore. I mean, the problem was taken care of. I knew that. I guess it still hadn’t fully sunk in, though. Seventeen years was a long time to be doing any one thing.

“Old habits die hard, I guess,” I muttered.

“They say it takes 19 days for any new habit to take.”

“And to break an old one?”

“I’d like to think of it as rewriting code,” he said.

“Nerd,” I accused.

“Jock,” he shot back, and I smiled.

We were silent for a long time and finally he asked me, “You don’t have to make a decision until you’ve seen the shop, will you at least go and do that?”

I thought about it and nodded slowly, “Yeah, I’ll do that. You coming with me?”

“If you want me to.”

“Yeah, I do.”

“Then I’ll go with you.”

More silence, the urge to say something growing in me like a soap bubble on the surface of the water. Growing and growing until it finally burst and the words rushed out, “I’m not going anywhere, you know that right?”

His expression said it all, that no, he really didn’t know that and I guess I only had myself to blame. I mean, I was nothing if not predictable and I was gypsy stock. The nomadiest of the nomads, born with wandering souls… except that must have skipped right over me because all I ever wanted was to put down roots. You had roots, you grew strong. I looked up into the trees and wistfully wished we were under our tree. I was half afraid to ask about it, seeing as it's probably been cut down or something.

“Penny for your thoughts?”

“That shit’s at least a nickel now if you account for inflation.”

He snorted, “More like a buck fifty or more.”

I grinned and knocked my shoulder into his, “Doesn’t matter now, just a fleeting one. Can’t even remember what it was,” I lied.

“Uh huh,” he finished off his beer and I did the same with mine.

“Not buying it?”

“Nope. It’s okay, though. You don’t have to tell me everything.”

“That’s what I love about you,” I said. “You make me do what I don’t want to do all the time, but only if it’s good for me.”

“I try,” he said with a shrug.

“No, you do.”

We lapsed into another comfortable silence, turning at the rustle of dried leaves and someone stumbling, a woman’s laugh, and finally, Dani and Thirteen came into view.

“Uh-oh! Looks like our secret hiding place is occupied,” he said affably.

“No, it’s cool,” Kyle said standing up and I did likewise, hastily so I didn’t end up swallowed by the hammock.

“You sure?” Thirteen asked.

“Totally, we were just heading in.”

“We were?” I asked with a shark’s grin.

“We were,” he said firmly and I couldn’t say I wasn’t looking forward to what he clearly had in mind.

“Well, all right then, Y'all have a good night.” Thirteen tipped an imaginary hat and Kyle captured my hand, dragging us away, back towards the club. We ditched our dead soldiers in a bin by the back door that was overflowing with them and passed through the open doorway.

“Sure we aren’t being anti-social?” I asked and he hauled me up against his body.

“Do I look like I give a fuck?” he demanded.

“That’s my line…” I murmured huskily as his lips descended on mine. We made it through his club room’s door and kicked it shut behind us, hands grasping and grabbing, pulling and shoving at clothes in a bid to get them off.

He, of course, got me naked first. He seemed to have a knack for that, drawing his hips away from my fingers which cradled and stroked his thick cock from root to tip, massaging the hard length in a bid to make him feel good and ramp up the excitement. Apparently, I ramped it up a little too high, a little too fast, because he bodily picked my skinny ass up off the floor and tossed me back-first onto the bed. I squealed and laughed and he dove over the top of me, mouth finding mine, kissing down my body, pausing to lavish my small breasts with attention.

“Don’t crack your head this time,” he growled and went in for the kill, sealing his mouth over my sex and sucking my clit, laving it with sure strokes of his tongue.

My cry was strangled and drowned out by a throaty moan and I gripped the bedding in clenched fists. He held my hips in his hands and when I proved I couldn’t hold still against his sweet onslaught, put an arm on them, forcing them down to the bed. He grinned at me from between my thighs, his brown eyes rich like chocolate and holding a dark light as he cracked, “You must be this tall to ride this ride.”

I laughed and again he killed it with the skill of his tongue against the most intimate parts of me, but I couldn’t care. I just tipped my head back and gave myself over to the sensations.

A warm, tingling rush filled my veins and my body grew wet and ready. That heavy, pure weight of desire settled into my core ready for the long haul as Kyle took his time working me up, bringing me so close, to the very brink, before maddeningly backing off just enough so that I wouldn’t come… at least not yet.

He kept me there on the precipice of that warm, sweet abyss for so long I thought I was going to go mad until finally, I started begging. Announcing his name like a plea into the dimly lit room but apparently, he was enjoying himself too much to quit just yet.

I was frustrated, my cunt tight and grasping at nothing, needing just that little bit more to shove me right over the fall, and when I reached the point of aggravation where I was just about to stop him, he slid two fingers inside me and crooked them just right. Instead of shattering, I exploded, the pieces of my being so damn small that I might as well have been dust in the wind.

He didn’t let me come back down, either. Working that bundle of nerves with light, intermittent flicks of his tongue sending shockwaves of electricity through my system, playing finely with the sweet pain of oversensitivity, the man was a master at his craft. He twitched his fingers, licked me slowly and I tightened around him and bucked, but he had me pinned like a fucking butterfly.

“Oh, god! Kyle please!” I gasped bordering on the edge of panic. Never had I ever lost control of my body and heart at the same time or so completely before and it was honestly so nice, cathartic to do so. I didn’t know if I was begging him to stop or to never quit and it was seriously confusing but in all sorts of good ways.