Chapter 13 – The Hair of the Dog

My head throbbed, my body ached and I felt nausea in the pit of my stomach. How much did I drink? I cracked open one eye and saw the time, 6:00am. Why was I so freaking hot? I tried to lift myself off the bed but I was stuck, tied down. What the hell? Something was laying on me. Its weight shifted - his cool fluid voice was barely a whisper.

“You okay baby? You need more water?” Alex asked.

“Huh? What am I doing here?” I questioned, my head still fighting fog.

“You were pretty drunk last night, Lex. I wasn’t about to send you off home like that, regardless of your protests,” he clarified.

“Oh, yeah... last night.” The events of the past evening came flooding back to me! As I sat up in bed, my head felt heavy.

“Ugghhhhhhhhh I feel sick.” I groaned.

“Next day remorse,” he laughed. “Been there too many times.”

“Did we?...” I asked.

“No,” he affirmed.

“I’m sorry Alex, I’m sure you didn’t want to spend your night babysitting me when you could have been getting laid. I’ll grab my stuff and get out of here.” I attempted again to raise my head off the pillow but he pushed me back down.

“Hey, no one held a gun to my head and I’d rather be here sleeping beside you than getting blown by some random chick I don’t care about. Besides, I got to break the rules last night,” he smirked.

“What rules?” I questioned, unsure of what exactly had transpired last night.

“I got you to sleep over!” he exclaimed.

“This doesn’t count. I was unconscious, I didn’t have free will,” I argued.

“Oh it counts baby.” He countered unable to hide his broad grin.

“Alex, I think lines are getting blurred. I don’t know what came over me last night, this isn’t our arrangement. This isn’t what we wanted,” I tried to reason, hiding the real reason why I had felt the need to numb myself with alcohol.

“How do you know what I want Lexi? You’ve never asked me!” His voice was now heated.

“We agreed! You agreed!” Was all I could manage.

“Yes I agreed, cause I wanted you. You intrigue me the way no other woman has. I love that you call it how it is. It’s so refreshing. But the sneaking around bullshit, that’s not me. If I’m with a girl, I don’t hide it like it’s something I’m ashamed of.” He growled.

“I’m not ashamed; I just don’t need to broadcast who I’m screwing! So this doesn’t work for you? Is that what you’re saying?” I jeered.

“I want to be with you, just you. We don’t have to be like James and Hannah but I just don’t like this just fucking status you seem to have attached to us.” He hissed.

“Well you sure have a funny way of showing it! Did you happen to inform the blonde bimbo who was eye fucking you back stage or the equally classless blonde who was riding you like a prized bull last night?” I exploded.

“WHAT?! You were backstage? So that is why you are mad!” he surmised. “Lexi...I wasn’t with anyone last night. YES - I was talking to girls, it’s part of the job. Girls feel entitled to touch and flirt with me but you know what, it doesn’t mean shit. I didn’t kiss or touch anyone. I didn’t want to. I wanted YOU.” He assured me.

I closed my eyes, what did I want? I can’t go down this road. I would not be one of those women who sacrificed everything for a man at the cost of herself. I had done that once and I would never do it again.

“Alex, I don’t want a boyfriend. I’m sorry.” My voice wavered.

“No boyfriend,” he confirmed “just no one else. I don’t share well, Lexi, and by the sounds of it neither do you.”

“I don’t know Alex,” I protested.

“Okay, let’s negotiate then,” he countered.

“Okay - No boyfriend, no girlfriend; but no one else. No phone calls. No sleep overs. No one knows. That’s as far as I’m going to bend.” I proposed.

He sighed. “I don’t like the no sleep over rule. Think of how many more times I could please you if you stayed in my bed, or I in yours,” he coaxed.

“Well that is a good point but it’s still a no,” I argued.

“Well I guess you’ve just challenged me to see if I can change your mind,” he nodded.

“Knock yourself out,” I laughed.

“So, now that we have gotten that out of the way…” I murmured. He stared at me with his astonishing clear eyes and lowered his head.

“Yes?” he asked.

“This is the part where you pleasure me. Or was that all talk?” I panted. His amazing smile spread across his face.

“All talk?” he scoffed. “Do you how much restraint I showed last night? You’re going to be walking with a limp” he smirked.

It was everything he promised and more. I lost count of the number of times he brought me to climax; he was an incredible and attentive lover. We took turns in assuming the lead. He submitted to me, and I to him, each instance bringing its own set of rewards.

“I should go home, you have another show tonight” I panted, unable to catch my breath.

“You coming?” he smirked.

“Didn’t I already?” I laughed.

“As it should be!” he asserted.

“Oh baby, no one could ever accuse you of not fulfilling your duty as my sex slave” I chortled as I stroked his damp, sex matted hair.

“I’ve got the business cards to prove it,” he mused.

There was a gentle knock at the door. “I’ll go get that; why don’t you go grab a shower? Feel free to take one of my shirts if you like.” He smiled and slid on a pair of boxer shorts. I reluctantly climbed out of bed and entered the bathroom. My body ached as much as my head did. Alex’s threat of a giving me a limp was not idle, he was a man of his word. I laughed aloud as I recalled the events that had brought me to this point - a crazy twist of fate.

 

~~~~~~

 

“Ugggghhhhh” moaned Hannah as we sat across from each other in the dining room; our eyes concealed by large sunglasses. People filtered in and joined us for a late breakfast.

“Oh my God. Can you turn down that shirt?” I stammered as Dan approached wearing a bright yellow Sex Pistols t-shirt.

“There is nothing wrong with this shirt; it’s my favourite. I brought it from the village,” Dan exclaimed.

“Well maybe the village will take it back!” I snipped.

“Never Mind the Bollocks,” said Dan attempting a dirty British accent. “This album was pivotal! Maybe you need to lay off the booze.”

“Shut it Dan!” Alex interjected.

“Hey don’t be pissed at me cause you ended up with the chick that wouldn’t put out,” Dan laughed.

“Maybe you should spend less time with your hand on snatch and more time on a bass so you don’t sound like shit.” I fired back.

“BUUUURRRRNNNN!” laughed Troy.

“Dude you just got owned by a drunk girl.” Jason declared, unable to hide his pleasure.

“Oh, we are definitely keeping her,” Alex laughed. James nodded in agreement.

“Yeah, whatever!” was all Dan could muster as the table erupted into fits of laughter.

“You should try eating something,” James offered.

“I don’t think I can stomach anything” I conceded. Hannah tentatively bit into her toast. “How much did we drink?” I asked her.

“I don’t remember, I thought you were keeping track?” she grimaced.

“You made me the responsible one?” I asked as I giggled in disbelief.

“It hurts to laugh” she groaned.

“I didn’t think it was possible but my hair hurts,” I agreed. Alex sat down between us with two glasses of orange juice, the sight made me want to dry heave.

“Drink!” he ordered, “Both of you.”

“Ughhhh Alex, I can’t do juice right now.” I protested as I pushed the glass away. Hannah wrinkled her nose at the mere suggestion.

“What the hell is in this Alex?” she quizzed as she sniffed her glass.

“Drink it, you guys will feel better. The hair of the dog. Drink!”

“Are you insane?” I asked, I couldn’t believe he was trying to give us more alcohol.

“Actually, he’s right. You will feel better. Alex and I have both been there.” James added as he rubbed Hannah’s back.

“FINE!” I gulped as I drained the glass. I winced and held my stomach as I willed myself not to lose what little contents it held. “Uhhhhhh” I mumbled.

“I’m not sure Babe.” Hannah hesitated, looking to James for reassurance.

“You chicken?” I goaded her as I started to feel a little better.

“No,” Hannah insisted. “I just don’t think this is a good idea.”

“If you’re chicken, just say you’re chicken Han,” Troy added.

“It’s okay Baby, you will feel better” James encouraged. Hannah placed the glass to her lips, and scrunched her eyes as she took a deep breath.

“One, Two, Three - Swallow,” Alex grinned.

“Word to live by Man, words to live by,” Dan joked.

“Dan! That’s my fucking wife!” James hissed.

“Sorry dude, I got caught in the moment. Sorry Han.” He shrugged. Troy and Jason both unsuccessfully stifled their laughter.

“Can you eat now?” Alex asked.

“Not sure, I think I should just go home,” I shrugged.

“I’d rather see you eat something first. Do you want some more juice? I’ll leave out the vodka this time,” he smiled.

“Ugh! Ok, if it gets you off of my back. I’ll eat something,” I mumbled.

“Mmmmm. I’d love to get you on your back,” he whispered as he leant into my ear, everyone else oblivious to his flirtation. He stood up and walked over to the breakfast buffet and loaded a plate with food. He sat it in front of me, a selection of fruit and baked goods. I tentatively bit into a strawberry; it was sweet and delicious. He pushed the plate closer, silently encouraging me to eat more. I hesitated but finally settled on a bunch of grapes and a bagel, Alex nodding approvingly as I ate.

“Better?” He asked.

“Yes,” I answered.

“Never drinking again!” Hannah exclaimed, her head resting in her hands.

“I think we just need to keep better track, Hannah. And no more tequila!” I groaned.

“No more tequila!” Hannah agreed.

 

~~~~~~

 

Hannah and I became close over the course of the following week. Mike’s recovery was coming along and his parents had flown home. Hannah had decided to stay for the duration of the Melbourne leg and was flying home when the boys headed to their next destination. The days were the same; I filled them with work, trying to balance the Power Station account with my regular work. Kate was patient because of the money it was bringing in but I could see that she was looking forward to having me back full time and at her disposal. I sneaked in a couple of long lunches here and there and took Hannah shopping, her taste was impeccable and she had the credit card to back it up. The shop assistants fell over themselves to attend to us, it was fun.

“That dress is amazing on you Lexi, you have to buy it,” insisted Hannah as I modelled an amazing red floral lace Scanlan and Theodore gown.

“Where am I going to wear it? It’s two Grand!” I protested.

“You’ll find an occasion. Trust me, it’s stunning. I’m buying it for you, I insist.” Hannah volunteered, handing over her black Amex card to a very excited attendant.

“Hannah, you don’t have to do that, I don’t need this dress,” I protested again.

“Just let someone do something nice for you without arguing Lexi, ok? Let’s say we’re doing it for me instead of you.” She cajoled.

“Okay, thank you.” I conceded and went to change as she completed the transaction. We had become firm friends in such a short time.

The nights were more exciting. I’d come home from work and get ready to head to see the show. Sometimes I’d have company, sometimes I went alone. Every show was better than the last. They put it all on the line, night after, night - giving their hearts and souls to the fans. I’d watch from the wings, mesmerized. I had such a huge respect for each and every one of them, even Dan was growing on me. It was staggering how good they were, especially James and Alex who performed flawlessly every night. They worked every inch of the crowd, it was incredible to watch. Alex would catch me staring from time to time and would give me a nod of acknowledgement. I could watch him for hours and never get bored, he was so compelling. I understood the attraction these girls had. I may not have a sign saying so, but I was captivated by him. I wanted him and only him.

I never ventured backstage again. I let Alex do his job without worrying about my feelings and I knew that at some point I had to trust him. It was a massive step for me but I reasoned that if he’d wanted to be with someone else, he would be. He had plenty of opportunity and yet each night he’d come back to his hotel room alone where I was waiting.

Our time together so far had been mind-blowing; we never seemed to tire of each other. It was primal yet pure. We each had a need that only the other could fill, not resting till exhaustion set in. I wanted him constantly, almost irrationally and he seemed to feel the same way. I loved it and yet it unnerved me, I was not willing to relinquish all control. Alex had me one hundred percent physically, there was nothing we hadn’t done at least once but emotionally, I held back. I was guarded and he knew it.

“Stay with me” were always his parting words.

“You know I can’t,” I would respond.

“Can’t or won’t?” he’d challenge as he tried to crack my tough veneer.

“Does it matter? Isn’t this enough? I love what we have.” I tried to soothe his disappointment.

“I want you to stay with me. One day Lexi, you’ll stay.” He affirmed.

“Maybe, but not today.” I left, as always, and went home to sleep alone.

Most nights I’d lie awake for hours after, his scent still lingering on my skin. I knew this was more than just sex and it scared the hell out of me but I couldn’t stop. I didn’t want to stop. I just had to keep it in perspective. I could do this. I could play close to the flame and not get burnt. I just had to be smart.

My phone buzzed as it did most nights.

- Are you sleeping? Alex xx

- If I was, I’m not now Lexi xx

- You can come punish me for waking you if you like

- It’s not punishment if you enjoy it!

- What if I try not to enjoy it?

- What if you try to go to sleep?

- I would if you stayed with me

- You’re delusional if you think that we’d sleep if I stayed!

- Sleep is overrated. Are you naked?

- Alex! Sleep! -Lexi xx

- Are you mad yet? I like you mad -Alex xx

My face hurt from my stupid grin; yep we both needed a program and possibly a sponsor. I was sure I wouldn’t be able to go cold turkey. I knew that it would have to come to end, in two days they were moving on to Sydney and I was working with them remotely, flying up when needed. It was going to end. It was just a matter of time.