I'm starting to wonder if this guy is ever going to kiss me.

There was a moment there, I thought that was it. Instead, Barrett tells me about his childhood, his family, his career as a bush pilot. He tells me about inheriting his money and building his house, and hiring Raven to help him find a woman to turn it into a home.

The moment passes quickly and now I'm standing on a corner of Barrett's property next to a pile of wood that will need split and stacked for seasoning and I'm wondering if maybe I'm not what he's looking for at all.

Rogue and Melissa seemed pretty sure that Bear was the right man for me. They spent a lot of time telling me about life in Alaska and Melissa and I had lots of conversations about what it really meant to be a bush pilot's wife. They were convinced that I'd adapt to this environment quickly and that their friend was just what I was looking for.

It never occurred to me that maybe I wouldn't be what he was looking for.

Maybe he thinks I can't hack it up here. Maybe he thinks I'm too high maintenance-- that I'll miss mani-pedis too much or that I won't be able to handle the winters.

I know I'm petite, just a little over 5 foot, but I've got a few extra pounds on me-- it's not like I look malnourished or anything. And just because I'm short, doesn't keep me from getting shit done. I can cook, I can keep a clean house, hell! I can run that log splitter I see peeking out from under the corner of a tarp behind this pile of logs and I can turn all these rounds into a well stacked wood pile. By myself, if that's what needs to be done.

I can do just about any kind of car repairs, short of tearing an engine apart, and I'm sure I can learn to do that if that's what it comes to.

Dammit. Why doesn't he like me? Is the chemistry just one sided? I make a mental note to call my nieces later and ask them for more details on why they agreed on this man. Maybe I can get a few clues as to what made our teams mutually agree that we were compatible. Because I honestly don't have a clue how to read this guy.

"I'm looking for a woman who wants me for me, not because I got some money or because I built a big house," Barrett is answering me, "I want a wife. A woman who wants to spend her life by my side. Raise some kids and grow old together."

His words cut through me. He's talking like these aren't the same things I want. Like I'm not what he's looking for. It hurts. More than I'd like to admit, but I'm not about to let that show.

By the time he's finished showing me the grounds and we're headed back in the house I've come to some conclusions. I can either shake hands and part ways with Barrett Hainey and go back home and contact Raven and try again, or I can prove to this mountain of a mountain man that I am everything he's looking for in a wife. Because, dammit, if I don't want this man.

As we walk into the kitchen a radio interrupts the silence between us. A man's voice is calling Bear, asking if he's in range.

Barrett walks over and picks up a hand held radio off the counter and, after a short exchange with the man on the other end, he sets it down and looks at me, "Um, sorry," he says bashfully, "That was Joe, they need me in the air."

I give him a warm smile. Getting called away because he has work to do is fine by me. I knew that would be part of my life if things worked out with us and I don't have a problem with being by myself.

"Of course," I reassure him, "I'm OK by myself." Then I second guess the worried on his face, "You can drop me off with Melissa, I guess," I tack on hastily, "you know, if you'd rather not have me here alone when you're not home."

I start to reach for my purse when Barrett doesn't answer. When I look up he's staring at me with an unreadable look on his face.

"No, it's fine," he says, drawing the words out slowly like they aren't the ones he's actually thinking, "if you feel comfortable staying here, that's fine. I don't know how long I'll be, but you got everyone's numbers, right?"

I nod and set my purse back down.

"'K then, if you get bored or scared or somethin' you give Mel or Sasha a call. I'll be back as soon as I can."

"OK," I say again.

There's an awkward pause between us where I think there's supposed to be a kiss on the cheek or a hug or something before we part ways but, once again, Bear manages to forego any sort of contact with me before he grabs his things and heads out the door.

I watch from the window till his truck is out of sight. It's still early in the morning, the whole day is ahead of me and from I've learned about Barrett's work, it's unlikely that I'll see him again for several hours.

What can I do to keep busy and prove to this man that I'm worthy of being his wife?