Chapter Fifteen
Dan
I watched Scarlett as she hugged herself, her shoulders hunched as she watched me with wide eyes. I felt…strange, like I held this woman’s world in my hands. Or, well, the fate of a child that belonged to the both of us.
It really would be better for everyone involved if I gave into the adoption idea. I hadn't actually thought of it, because I hadn't had time. I’d been left with some stranger’s baby, and all I could think of was how to find the mother and return the child. But, it wasn’t that simple anymore.
I didn’t know how I felt about Scarlett, or the baby. I’d had fun with her, but this was all too sudden. My wife had left me because I’d been reluctant to have a child in the first place.
When I thought of it that way, the current situation was pretty ironic, how I’d fallen into the exact kind of situation I’d been running from with Laila.
But…is this really the same?
With Laila, I’d felt panicked every time she mentioned children. I’d done everything to try and get her to forget it. I’d even given up nights of sex, because I knew she was off birth control and she didn’t want to use a condom, because she wanted to try and get pregnant. We’d already been divorced for a year when I met Scarlett, and while I regretted how I’d treated her for her first time, I couldn’t entirely regret having slept with her.
And now, a baby had come out of it. One that neither of us were really in the right place to look after. But, did that mean I had to give the baby away?
No.
The word popped in my mind unbidden, and it caught me by surprise. But, the more I thought about it, the more comfortable I was with the idea. Scarlett and I were more or less in the same boat, both in deep shit and with a responsibility we hadn't planned for. I couldn’t leave her to take care of our baby alone. She’d helped me when I was at my worst, and she was right, I did owe her.
“Do you have some sort of plan?” I asked.
I must have been silent for too long, because she jumped when I spoke, then blinked at me like she hadn't understood me.
“W-well,” she stuttered. “A plan? I…”
My mind was whirling with ideas and plans of my own, and now that I was doing more than feeling sorry for myself, I could feel excitement start to build in my chest. I walked over to Scarlett, and she jumped a little, but didn’t move away.
“Yeah,” I said. “A plan. You were leaving the hotel, right? Where do you plan to go, and do you know what you’re going to do?”
She blinked at me some more. “Um, I don’t really… I was just going to go into town and see what I could do. I’ve talked to some people before and I have a few leads…”
I took both her hands in mine, her eyes widening. I pressed her hands together between mine, closing the space between us.
“Would you move in with me?” I asked.
She gasped. “What?”
“Move in with me,” I repeated. “I just figured something out. You named him Makas because it meant hope, right? I guess you could say I just realized that, in a way, you and Makas are my hope.”
She frowned, her eyes falling to where I held her hands between us, chewing nervously on her lower lip. “What do you need hope for, though? You had a good job before, didn’t you? You could probably get another one easily, right?”
I chuckled. “Yeah, it’s not going to be that easy. If it was, you wouldn’t have found me in a clinic early in the morning, looking like a hobo in a suit after days of not showering. My life´s a mess right now, as is my house. But I want to change all that.”
She looked up at me through her eyelashes, still chewing on her lip, a nervous tick of hers I’d noticed from before.
“Believe me, okay?” I held her hands tighter between mine. “When my wife left me, I…kind of lost it. I thought I was coping, but my friends had to intervene so many times, and I messed up badly enough at work that it got me fired. Meeting you was the happiest I ever was in the past two years. And the responsibility of looking after a kid might just be the kick I need to get my ass in gear.”
I couldn’t say I was in love with Scarlett. Being around her made it easy for me to forget my worries, even though at the moment, a great deal of them involved her. But my heart felt clear for the first time in a while. I rarely went with just my intuition instead of cold, hard, reliable logic.
“But,” she started, hesitant. “What are we going to do? You need to look for a job, and I still need to try and sell the hotel…”
“I have some savings, just enough that I don’t need to look for anything right away. My friends, the guys you saw with me outside, were nice enough to buy a bunch of stuff for the baby, we probably won’t need to get any more for some time. I was thinking…we could just stay at home for a while, and we could try to get used to raising a kid, together. Then, I’ll look into getting a new job.”
I frowned as I thought. I didn’t have any definitive plans, and having the spare time would be useful. Because I would definitely need a plan if I was going to re-enter the corporate world with my current track record.
Then I remembered I was forgetting something, and focused my attention on Scarlett.
“I should have asked this already, but do you know what you want to do with your life, now that you no longer have the hotel?”
She blinked at me, looking surprised that I’d asked. I didn’t know if she even had an answer, but when she did speak, it was my turn to be surprised.
“I just…want to be happy,” she admitted.
I could feel my expression twist, just a little. I’d been ambitious all my life, and while I could understand wanting happiness and contentment, just wanting to be happy wasn’t a goal one should have for life, how I saw it. But if it was what she wanted…
“If that’s what you want, then it’s a start,” I decided. “We can go from there.”
Chapter Sixteen
Scarlett
I woke up in a large bed, alone, and for a moment, I was disoriented. Until I remembered I’d moved in with Dan. It had been a few days already.
Everything had happened so quickly. There wasn’t anything left in the hotel anyway, so after he’d called his friends to pick us up, I’d locked it and we’d left. I still had to do something about it, but I had time and a place to think.
Dan’s house was bigger than I’d expected, big enough for our little family of three. He’d told me he hadn't planned for a family any time soon, but he had a couple guest rooms. He was letting me sleep in his room, while he took one of the guest rooms. His friends had bought a crib for Makas, and when we got back, they’d helped to turn the extra room into a nursery where he slept.
I didn’t like sleeping alone, and I didn’t like the idea of the baby asleep in a room on his own, so he was in a crib just a few feet from the bed. I got up and walked over to him, smiling down at him when I found he was still sleeping. I reached for one of his little fists, the one he didn’t have in his mouth. I felt the same awe and fear I had as when I’d first held him in my arms when he was born. My little unexpected miracle.
“You wake me up in the middle of the night because you’re hungry, and you look this much like an angel in the morning, huh.”
Makas removed the fist from his mouth to smack his lips, stretching his arms a little, before the wet fist was back in his mouth. I laughed quietly to myself.
We had a baby monitor set up, and I made sure it was turned on, before taking the speaker with me as I walked out of the bedroom, leaving the door open. I heard sounds coming from the kitchen, and followed the smell of breakfast.
“Did you learn to cook since the last time I saw you?” I asked, walking into the kitchen.
He glanced at me over his shoulder with a grin from where he was holding the pan handle, ready to flip a pancake. “Only a little bit,” he admitted. “I decided I couldn’t live on frozen food and take out and sandwiches forever. Or you could say my meddling friends decided it, and they took it upon themselves to tech me how to make a few things.”
I yawned as I moved to sit at the island and watch him.
“Sorry I got up so late. I wanted to make breakfast…”
He shrugged without turning around. “It’s fine. It was your turn to be with Makas last night, and he woke me up with the crying a few times. I figured you could use the break.”
Dan finished up with breakfast, then set the food on the table. I laughed a bit, because it was what I’d made for him before; pancakes, bacon and eggs, with some milk and coffee on the side.
We chatted a bit about inconsequential things. There were plenty of important topics we needed to discuss, but we had time.
Besides, in the few days I’d been living with him, I’d realized the connection we’d felt before was still there, even with a baby in the middle. We were giving the whole living together thing a try and falling into it pretty easily, like we’d done it for a while, because we were so comfortable around each other. I’d missed that with my family as they all left, one by one, but it was different with Dan.
For one, when I went to bed, alone, in his large bed, I sometimes fantasized about what it would be like if he could be in the bed with me.
Breakfast lasted longer than it should have, and an hour later we were at the sink finishing up on washing the dishes. The bell ringing interrupted us, and Dan groaned.
“Who is it?” I asked, curious.
He sighed. “My meddlesome friends have equally meddlesome wives. They insisted on coming over to talk to you.”
“Oh.”
I bit down on my lip. I’d been properly introduced to his friends, and I knew they all had kids. But, I hadn't met their spouses yet.
“You don’t have to look like that, it’s not like they’re going to eat you. If anything, they’re upset at me. Trust me, they’re friendly.”
I frowned at him. “If they’re so friendly, then why are you backing away from the front door?”
He winced. “Like I said, they’re upset with me. Just go open the door and tell them I’m with the baby if they ask.”
He turned tail and ran back to the bedroom. I sighed, and headed for the front door. I was nervous, but if I was going to be staying with Dan, then I would meet them at some point. I took a deep breath and let it out, before I opened the door. Two women stood there, both of them pregnant with one of them being further along by a few months going by size, both with friendly smiles on their faces.
“Hi,” I said quietly, giving them a small wave, and probably giving away my nervousness as well.
“Hi there,” one of them said, the heavily pregnant one. “I’m Kylie, Noah’s wife. And this is Ivy, Chad’s wife,” she pointed at the other woman. “Do you mind if we come in?”
I smiled at them and hoped it looked natural. “Of course I don’t mind. Dan is playing with Makas right now, though.”
“Oh, that’s just fine,” Ivy said. “He should be helping you look after the baby after all. We left our own kids with our husbands. Children need both their parents, after all, not just their moms.”
Kylie nodded solemnly at her words, though she ruined it by smiling. We moved to the living room, and the two of them took the couch, while I sat on the single seat catty corner from theirs. It felt too much like I was in an interview with the both of them turned to stare at me.
“Is there anything I can get for you?” I asked, my years in the service business kicking in. “Something to drink, or…”
“We really just came to talk to you,” Kylie said, shaking her head.
“We heard the whole story from the guys,” Ivy said. “And we wanted to come talk to you, and let you know that if you need anything, we’re here for you.”
Kylie nodded. “Martin’s wife will probably be along soon. She just got the news she was pregnant and her morning sickness keeps her down the first couple months after it starts.”
I nodded. I’d gone through it myself, so I knew how awful it could be. I’d talked to my neighbor, and realized I was pretty lucky, because it could have been a lot worse.
I also calmed down, realizing from their words and their smiles that they were nice, like Dan had said. With the way they were looking at me, I felt a little more at home and comfortable around them, and my own smile became firmer. It had been a while since I’d had friends, but I needed someone to confide in urgently.
“Thanks for that. I kinda feel like I’m in way over my head,” I admitted. “I’ve never even thought of having kids. And living with Dan is just…” I frowned, trying to find a way to describe it. “I don’t know. I mean, we’re okay, but one moment he’s hot, and the next he’s just ice cold and I don’t even know if he really wants me here…”
He’d asked me to move in impulsively, but I was worried he’d tell me to leave eventually.
“You don’t have to worry about Dan,” Kylie said, waving a dismissive hand.
Ivy hummed in agreement. “He doesn’t go back on his word, ever. He’s probably just as worried as you are. The guy´s a total pussycat, deep down. Believe me, none of them have had easy rides when it came to parenthood.”
I was just about to ask what she meant, when Kylie interrupted and said, “Don’t let him bully you, though!”
I could tell them my story. That my whole life, I´d been dumped on by my family and maybe that was why a part of me felt a bit stronger. That and knowing that I was a mom. Knowing that Makas relied on me to make decisions for him. I didn´t say a word as they went on to giving me tips and pointers, on how to deal with the baby, and Dan, and I felt like I should have been taking notes, because I had a lot to learn.
Chapter Seventeen
Dan
It had been my decision to ask Scarlett to move in with me. I’d all but said I would support her.
Days later, and I was sort of having second thoughts.
A while after I’d retreated into the bedroom to hide from my friends’ wives, Makas had woken up, and immediately started crying. Because Scarlett was busy, I’d picked him up to try and calm him down, at the same time trying to figure out what had him in a bad mood.
I checked what I feared most, first. But there was no smell, and his diaper didn’t seem heavy, so it wasn’t soiled. I breathed a sigh of relief and rocked him gently. There was a bottle on the nightstand by the bed I knew Scarlett had left for last night. Scarlett had told me she breastfed him, but Martin had told me it wouldn’t hurt to give the baby some formula as long as she didn’t stop nursing him.
The bottle still had some formula in it, so she must have added more after she fed him last night. I figured it would be fine, and I tried to give him the bottle. He wouldn’t take it, though.
It took me an hour to get him to quiet down, and I was pretty sure the only reason he fell asleep was because he grew tired, not because I actually calmed him down.
“I know the guys told me about it already, but…” I sighed, slumping on the bed.
Crying babies were exhausting. I’d woken up early this morning because he was crying, and I’d had to change his diaper. I couldn’t go back to sleep, so I’d spent some time on my computer, and when the day started to brighten, I made food. After soothing him through another crying binge, I was tired enough to fall asleep. And I did.
I was woken up by more crying, and I groaned as I sat up, my eyes squinting open. Before I could go to the crib, though, Scarlett was walking into the room.
“Hey,” she said, shooting me a smile. She went and picked the little guy up. “I figured you could use a break. I would have come earlier if I’d known you were sleeping.”
I rubbed my eyes. “What´s the time?”
“It’s afternoon already. I made some lunch, Kylie and Ivy ate, then they left. There’s some left over for you if you’d like.”
“Ah,” I murmured.
She moved with Makas to the rocking chair that sat in the corner, another present from the guys. I got up as she was lifting up her top, going to get some food. I served some for myself, and went right back. She looked up, smiling at me, as I walked into the room.
“I thought you had a rule about eating in the bedroom?” she said, arching an eyebrow.
“I’ll overlook it for this one time,” I said, winking, and she giggled.
I watched her nurse the baby as I ate, then she got up to burp him, before putting him back in his crib. The baby slept a lot. He was usually up for some hours in the evening, getting to sleep late, and waking up in the course of the night wanting attention for hours at a time. The guys had told me about it, too, and how it got better as time passed. I hoped it would happen soon.
Scarlett, though, looked like she was having the time of her life.
“How do you do that?” I asked, curious. “The baby kept you up, but you’re awake and smiling and acting like it’s nothing at all…”
She shrugged. “To be fair, I did have him for some time before I met you again. I’m kinda used to it. And… I like it, having someone to look after. I’ve done it all my life, now it’s just a baby.”
I snorted. I could never see it so simply.
“You know, when you said you only wanted to be a mom for the time being, I’d worried a little.”
She sighed. “I know working to get a job would help out…”
“You don’t have to get one,” I reassured her. “The more time I spend with the two of you, the more I realize that…it suits you. You’re a natural, Scarlett.”
Her eyes widened in surprise, and I realized I hadn't been complimenting her enough. There was a flush on her cheeks, and looking at her, I could feel the spark that had attracted me to her before. I got up, leaving my empty plate on the nightstand. Then I walked over to her, taking one of her hands in mine.
“Dan?” she whispered, her breath starting to pick up as she stared up at me.
I smirked. “The baby’s asleep,” I murmured. “I know it’s still pretty early, but the baby will want some attention later. I want to take you to bed.”
She sucked in a breath. “I’m going to assume it’s not to sleep, because it is really early.”
I just hummed, leaning down to slant my mouth over hers in a kiss. She was still for a second, then she moaned and stepped closer, pressing her body against mine.
“Please,” she breathed out when we pulled back from the kiss. “I’ve wanted you since I saw you at the clinic,” she admitted. “But I didn’t think you still…”
I sighed, nuzzling my cheek in her hair. “I don’t think I can stop wanting you, if that’s what has you so worried.”
She snaked her arms around my neck, kissing my neck. Only to freeze.
“We are not doing this with the baby in the room,” she said, frowning up at me.
“Of course not. We’re going to the room I’ve been using.”
She pulled away from me. “I’ll get the baby monitor, I left it in the kitchen.”
Scarlett went running, and I would have laughed at her eagerness, except I was just as much if not more eager. I left the door open and waited for her in the hall, before leading her to the room I’d been sleeping in since she moved in. I would be going back to sleeping in my bed that night.
“I’m here,” Scarlett said, sounding breathless as she came into the room.
She left the speaker by the nightstand, where we’d be sure to hear, and stood fidgeting by the bed. Her eyes jumped from it to me, and I laughed.
“Come here,” I called, opening my arms for her.
She stepped toward me immediately. I wrapped my arms around her, and dropped us both onto the bed. She yelped, before breaking out in giggled. It was a lovely sound, but I cut it off as I pressed my lips against hers in another kiss, rolling her so she lay beneath me. We squirmed until we were in the center of the bed, Scarlett with her legs wrapped around my hips, and her fingers digging into my back as I ravaged her mouth.
We’d get to the main event, but I planned to take my time. I wasn’t going to make the mistake I’d made the first time; I was going to take my time making love to her, and it would be the first of many times to come. I knew that I had a good thing with Scarlett. So different to Laila. She made me feel like the man that I wanted to be, rather than I needed to be. She was happy to take my good points and my crappy ones too. I wasn´t perfect. Far from it, but with Scarlett I felt it and with that feeling, I knew that it was going to be a beautiful relationship. We just had to get to know each other better and that would all happen in good time.